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George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





previously on my dick's adventure i gave myself urethritis by having sex too hard in february and was out for 2 1/2 weeks. this time i have a weird kind of red rashy/ring right under the glans. wtf is going on this year with my dick?!?

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girl befriender
Sep 22, 2014

by vyelkin
welcome to the disease their's no cure for

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

your worthless dick is made of glass apparently.

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





Christmas Miracle posted:

your worthless dick is made of glass apparently.



if only my dick yelled like samuel jackson that would own

fun tunnel
Feb 16, 2007

that boys so lovely
op has gaids. my gonondolances

you irl
Jan 22, 2014
you just need a dickectomy it's no big deal if you don't mind having a vagina instead of a penis for the rest of your life

Irish Joe
Jul 23, 2007

by Lowtax
Where's the picture of your brokeass dick, human being?

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

heh, never had this problem....... cos i never had sex........ heh, i am just beyond some things.....

Kleen_TheRacistDog
Feb 17, 2014

Can't bust the Krust fuckman
www.skullmund.com
i got arrested for child molestation b/c my GF is preggers and my big dick entered the womb and BF'd the kid on accident.

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:

i got arrested for child molestation b/c my GF is preggers and my big dick entered the womb and BF'd the kid on accident.

:wom:

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:

i got arrested for child molestation b/c my GF is preggers and my big dick entered the womb and BF'd the kid on accident.

INCHI DICKARI
Aug 23, 2006

by FactsAreUseless
A rash? Come the gently caress on, I was hoping for at least a penile fracture or a degloving of some sort

----------------
This thread brought to you by a tremendous dickhead!

lonesomedwarf
Mar 22, 2010

Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:

i got arrested for child molestation b/c my GF is preggers and my big dick entered the womb and BF'd the kid on accident.

in borat voice HIGH FIVE!!!

GrrrlSweatshirt
Jun 2, 2012
once i met a guy who actually did "break" his dick and didn't get medical help fast enough for it

he spent years getting it back to a normal state and said it was still way harder to get it up lmao

e: we tried to get him to show us his dick but he wasnt drunk enough

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





OFFICER 13 INCH posted:

A rash? Come the gently caress on, I was hoping for at least a penile fracture or a degloving of some sort

pffft hardly

its like this weird kinda soreness looking thing. skin was tight and not lubed up and proceeded to get a friction burn right under the head. soap and continuing to masturbate keeps this baby going.


dont get handjobs friends

BONE DOG
Jun 7, 2009

by Fluffdaddy


this is what is happening to you op

Sponge Baathist
Jan 30, 2010

by FactsAreUseless
I wanted to hear the tall tale of how the OP was really rich and did a bunch of drugs and banged so many supermodels that he couldn't gently caress normal people anymore but instead we got a short tale of fungi.

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





mookface posted:



this is what is happening to you op

an accurate portrayal of when im with this girl yea

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





amityville anus posted:

I wanted to hear the tall tale of how the OP was really rich and did a bunch of drugs and banged so many supermodels that he couldn't gently caress normal people anymore but instead we got a short tale of fungi.

i am sorry i am not rich enough to have models do lines of coke off my raging hard on

Hell Yeah
Dec 25, 2012

never trust anyone else to jerk your dick imo.

orangesampson
Nov 22, 2012

by Ion Helmet

SaltLick posted:

previously on my dick's adventure i gave myself urethritis by having sex too hard in february and was out for 2 1/2 weeks. this time i have a weird kind of red rashy/ring right under the glans. wtf is going on this year with my dick?!?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XmIqIVxUuKs

you irl
Jan 22, 2014
my dick is in peak physical condition i really can't sympathize with this thread

just lifted, d is pretty swole

orangesampson
Nov 22, 2012

by Ion Helmet
You wake up as an an influential male, with all this.

and want to die

Samuel L. ACKSYN
Feb 29, 2008


ur jerkin technique is obvs. hosed

George H.W. Cunt
Oct 6, 2010





Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:

ur jerkin technique is obvs. hosed

wasnt my doing but yea hers is p bad

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Slush Garbo
Nov 20, 2007

FALSE SLACK
is
BETTER
than
NO SLACK

Christmas Miracle thinks this means 'WOW'

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