Let's Read the Sword of Truth books! (Or not. Can we not?)

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > Let's Read the Sword of Truth books! (Or not. Can we not?)

«‹›173 »

Pimpmust: Oct 1, 2008

I'm still curious just how in the world it came to be that this book-series got itself a two season TV-show :iiam:

In 2008

No wait, 2008... Libertarian power fantasy... this is your fault :obama:

, aint' it? Thanks Obama :argh:

# ? Oct 1, 2014 21:00

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 26, 2024 09:53

Grimpond: Dec 24, 2013

I remember first discovering this series years and years ago. I thought they were okay, but weirdly descriptive in places, but then it just kept getting bizarrely political, and then I think I stopped after the book where dick spends time in the wheel of time knock off city as a slave with a magic slave collar to keep him from using magic or something. Am I remembering that right?

# ? Oct 1, 2014 22:14

That Old Tree: Jun 24, 2012; nah

Grimpond posted:

I remember first discovering this series years and years ago. I thought they were okay, but weirdly descriptive in places, but then it just kept getting bizarrely political, and then I think I stopped after the book where dick spends time in the wheel of time knock off city as a slave with a magic slave collar to keep him from using magic or something. Am I remembering that right?

Well that is I think book 2. So...

# ? Oct 1, 2014 22:19

Bieeanshee: Aug 21, 2000; Not keen on keening.; Grimey Drawer

I can't help thinking that Dick Cipher's name is a lovely nod to (who is) John Galt.

# ? Oct 1, 2014 22:37

Lemon-Lime: Aug 6, 2009

Pimpmust posted:

I'm still curious just how in the world it came to be that this book-series got itself a two season TV-show

Libertarians are lovely rich people, so of course they have money to throw at lovely things.

# ? Oct 1, 2014 22:54

Calde: Jun 20, 2009

I'm still amazed that younger me managed to reject Faith of the Fallen as inserting a hamfisted political agenda into my "harmless" swords & sorcery books. I dropped the series completely after the pacifist-slaughter. I should probably thank Goodkind for accidentally warning me off from fedora-wearing Objectivism.

The series even has the evil empire of blond-haired, blue eyed D'Haryans eventually fighting on the sides of the "good guys" after their evil leader is deposed..

# ? Oct 1, 2014 22:56

claw game handjob: Mar 27, 2007; pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

Quick note: the end of this chapter is going to get real uncomfortable in a work-safe fashion, be aware.

Remember how I mentioned the last chapter ended with Richard and Kahlan talking about how the less people who knew about her, the safer she was? In fact, let me quote it so you can see I'm not making that up.

quote:

Her green eyes turned hard. "They are called a quad. They are, well, they are like assassins. They are sent to kill�" She caught herself again. "They kill people." Her face regained the calm countenance it had when he first saw her. "I think that maybe the fewer people who know about me, the safer I will be."

Well, Richard dragged her to Michael's government party. Like, chapter 3 begins there.

quote:

People in fine clothes strolled the lawns and gardens, making Richard feel suddenly out of place. He knew he must look a mess in his dirty, sweat-stained forest garb, but he hadn't wanted to waste the time going out of his way to his house to get cleaned up. Besides, he was in a dark mood and didn't much care how he looked. He had more important things on his mind.

Those things are "gently caress the Midlands" and "man I'm hungry". Within instants of entering the party, we meet Richard's pal Chase (note: not his real name, it is actually given to us as "Dell Brandstone", but everyone calls him Chase, and no, this is never explained), a Boundary Warden who watches the border between the Westlands and the Midlands. The conversation is basically recounting the prior chapters until we learn that Michael has called in every single Boundary Warden to be bodyguards at this party.

quote:

Chase rested his left hand on one of the knife handles. "What indeed." His face gave no hint of emotion. It rarely did. "Could be he just wants us around for effect. People are afraid of the wardens. You've been away to the woods since your father was killed, not that I'm saying I wouldn't do the same if I were you. All I'm saying is you haven't been around. Strange things have been going on, Richard. People coming and going in the night. Michael calls them 'concerned citizens.' He's been talking some nonsense about plots against the government. He has the wardens all over the grounds."

Richard looked around, but didn't see any. He knew that didn't mean anything. If a boundary warden didn't want to be seen, he could be standing on your foot and you wouldn't be able find him.

Chase drummed his fingers on a knife handle as he watched Richard's eyes scan about. "My boys are out there, take my word."

"Well, how do you know Michael isn't right, what with the father of the new First Councilor being murdered and all?"

Chase gave his finest look of disgust. "I know every little slime in Westland. There's no plot. Might be a bit of fun to be had if there were, but I think I'm just part of the decoration. Michael said I should 'stay visible.'" His expression sharpened. "And about your father's murder, well, George Cypher and I go way back, way back to before when you were born, back to before the boundary. He was a good man. I was proud to call him friend." Anger heated in his eyes. "I've twisted a few fingers." He shifted his weight, taking another look around before bringing his fierce expression back to Richard. "Twisted hard. Hard enough to cause their owners to spit out their own mother's name if it had been the right one. No one knows a thing, and believe me, if they did they would have been happy to have shortened our conversation. First time I've ever chased anyone and not been able to get even a whiff."

Lesson one about Richard's world, folks: every government is corrupt, without exception*. Objectivists are not people who you would call fond of governments as a whole, and this is the very first point where I can start bridging these gaps. Don't worry, we'll get more.

_{* Except for one that we'll get to later.}

quote:

The two turned and melted into the crowd entering the house, moving through the entry, across white marble floors, to the elegant central meeting hall. Marble walls and columns glowed with a cold eerie cast where the sunlight streaming in from above touched them. Richard had always preferred the warmth of wood, but Michael had maintained that anyone could go out and make what they wanted from wood, but if you wanted marble, you had to hire a lot of people who lived in wood houses to do the work for you. Richard remembered a time before their mother died, when he and Michael played in the dirt, building houses and forts with sticks. Michael had helped him then. He wanted so much for Michael to help him now.

That line in italics is really loving funny given where these books end up. Hint: Richard is going to singlehandedly carve a set of marble statues at some point.

quote:

Kahlan scrutinized them. "Some of the serving girls have long hair. That is allowed?"

Richard looked around, a little bewildered. "Yes. Anyone can have any kind of hair they want. Look." He held his arm close to his chest and pointed as he leaned toward her. "Those women over there are councilors, some have short hair, some have long. Whatever they want." He looked at her out of the corner of his eye. "Do people tell you to cut your hair?"

She lifted an eyebrow to him. "No. No one has ever asked me to cut my hair. It is simply that where I come from, the length of a woman's hair has a certain social significance."

"Does that mean that you are someone of considerable standing?" He took the edge off the question with a playful smile. "Seeing as how you have such long beautiful hair, I mean."

She gave him back a small smile, devoid of joy. "Some think so. I could only expect that after this morning, the thought had entered your mind. We all can be only what we are, nothing more, or less."

"Well, if I ask anything a friend shouldn't, just kick me."

Alright, so. Keep this line in mind, but I'll come back to it at the end of this post. In the meantime, Kahlan uses a clever bit of subterfuge to see if two men who are staring at them are focusing on herself or Richard. It's Richard. This does not make Kahlan feel any better, however.

quote:

"There is no way another quad could track you now, not once you have come here, to Hartland. It's impossible." He knew enough about tracking to feel confident that he was telling her the truth.

Kahlan hooked a finger in the neck of his shirt and drew his face close. There was a flash of angry intolerance in her green eyes. Her voice came in a slow, harsh whisper. "When I left my homeland, five wizards cast spells over my tracks so none could know where I went, or follow, and then they killed themselves so they could not be made to talk!" Her teeth were gritted in anger, and her eyes were wet. She was starting to tremble. "Richard, I am scared to death!" She was trembling more now. "If you hadn't been there today, you don't know what would have happened to me. The dying would have been the best of it. You don't know about those men." She shook uncontrollably, giving herself over to her fear.

He promises that they'll go see Zedd later, Zedd being "the smartest man [Richard] knows". That'll work, right? But their conversation is interrupted by the guest of honor.

quote:

Whispers rippled through the crowd as heads turned to the far side of the room. It was Michael. Richard took Kahlan's hand and moved to the side of the room, closer to his brother, so they could watch.

As Michael stepped up onto a platform, Richard realized why it had taken him so long to come out. He had been waiting for the sunlight to fall on that spot, so he could stand in the light and be lit in its glory for all to see.

Not only was he shorter than Richard, but heavier and softer. Sunlight lit his mop of unruly hair. His upper lip proudly displayed a mustache. He wore baggy white trousers, and his white tunic with bloused sleeves was cinched at the waist by a gold belt. Standing there in the sunlight, Michael positively gleamed, casting the same cold, eerie glow the marble did when struck by the sun. He stood out in stark relief against the shadowed background.

This next part is... I am going to mildly abridge this. Michael gives a speech, which begins with saying "I've sent men out to round up conspirators in our midst, the reason we have the wardens here guarding all of us. These folks are war-hawks who wish ill upon those in the Midlands and D'Hara, which is going to be a problem when the boundaries break down someday. We want peace, not war! But we're gonna be peaceful, you dig?" The crowd is totally into it, and then... this.

quote:

Richard was stunned. He had never heard his brother speak with such conviction or eloquence. It all seemed to make such sense. After all, here he stood with a woman from across the boundary, from the Midlands, and she was already his friend. He was starting to see his brother in a new light. People had been moved by Michael's words in a way Richard had never witnessed. Michael was pleading for peace and friendship with other peoples. What could be wrong with that?

Why did he feel so uneasy?

"And now, to the other part," Michael continued, "to the real suffering around us. While we have worried about the boundaries that have not harmed a single one of us, many of our families, friends, and neighbors have suffered, and died. Tragic and needless deaths, in accidents with fire. Yes, that is what I said. Fire."

People mumbled in confusion. Michael was starting to lose his bond with the crowd. He seemed to expect it; he looked from face to face, letting the confusion build, and then dramatically he thrust his hand out, his finger pointing.

At Richard.

"There!" he screamed. Everyone turned as one. Hundreds of eyes looked at Richard. "There stands my beloved brother!" Richard tried to shrink. "My beloved brother who shares with me"�he pounded a fist to his chest�"the tragedy of losing our own mother to fire! Fire took our mother from us when we were young, and left us to grow up alone, without her love and care, without her guidance. It was not some imagined enemy from across a boundary that took her, but an enemy of fire! She couldn't be there to comfort us when we hurt, when we cried in the night. And the thing that wounds the most is that it didn't have to be."

Tears, glistening in the sunlight, ran down Michael's cheeks. "I am sorry, friends, please forgive me." He wiped the tears with a handkerchief he had handy. "It's just that only this morning I heard of another fire that took a fine young mother and father, and left their daughter an orphan. It brought my own pain back to me and I couldn't remain silent." Everyone was now solidly back with him. Their tears flowed freely. A woman put her arm around Richard's shoulder as he stood numb. She whispered how sorry she was.

"I wonder how many of you have shared the pain my brother and I live with every day. Please, those of you who have a loved one, or a friend, who has been hurt, or even killed, by fire, please, hold up your hands." Quite a few hands went up, and there was wailing from some in the crowd.

"There, my friends," he said hoarsely, spreading his arms wide, "there is the suffering among us. We need look no further than this room."

Richard tried to swallow the lump in his throat as the memory of that horror came back to him. A man who had imagined their father had cheated him lost his temper and knocked a lamp off the table as Richard and his brother slept in the back bedroom. While the man dragged his father outside, beating him, his mother pulled Richard and his brother from the burning house, then ran back inside to save something, they never knew what, and was burned alive. Her screams brought the man to his senses, and he and their father tried to save her, but couldn't. Filled with guilt and revulsion at what he had caused, the man ran off crying and yelling that he was sorry.

That, his father had told them a thousand times, was the result of a man losing his temper. Michael shrugged it off; Richard took it to heart. It had instilled in him a dread of his own anger, and whenever it threatened to come out, he choked it off.

Michael was wrong. Fire had not killed their mother; anger had.

Arms hanging limply at his side, head bowed, Michael spoke softly again. "What can we do about the danger to our families from fire?" He shook his head sadly. "I do not know, my friends.

"But, I am forming a commission on the problem, and I urge any concerned citizen to come forward with suggestions. My door always stands open. Together we can do something. Together we will do something.

"And now my friends, please excuse me, and allow me to go comfort my brother, as I am afraid bringing out our personal tragedy was a surprise to him, and I must ask his forgiveness."

He hopped down off the stand, the crowd parting to let him through. A few hands reached out to touch him as he passed. He ignored them.

Richard stood and glared as his brother strode to him. The crowd moved away. Only Kahlan stayed at his side, her fingers lightly touching his arm. People went back to the food and began talking excitedly among themselves, about themselves, and forgot him. Richard stood tall and choked off his anger.

Smiling, Michael slapped Richard on the shoulder. "Great speech!" he congratulated himself. "What did you think?"
Richard looked down at the patterns on the marble floor. "Why did you bring her death into it? Why did you have to tell everyone about it? Why did you use her like that?"

Michael put an arm around Richard's shoulder. "I know it hurts, and I am sorry, but it's for a greater good. Did you see the tears in their eyes? The things I've started are going to take us all to a better life, and help Westland grow to prominence. I believe what I said; we have to look to the challenge of the future with excitement, not fear."

So. Let's go back to Objectivism for a second. A huge undercurrent to Objectivist works tends to be that the mass of people are easily led and/or fools to reject its teachings, however, governments, as bodies which generally cater to the masses in this era, are used as tools to let the majority cripple the Objectivist superman. The comment earlier about how one cannot be "any more, or any less, than what they are" is real similar to a general belief that governing bodies, unions, and pretty much any organization is used as a weapon of the weak to bring the strong down to their level for the sake of "fairness", which is a foul word to any hardcore Randian.

This poo poo is gonna run rampant in this series.

If you didn't think that was enough, Michael then poo poo-talks their father and pretty much makes the subtext of "something shady has happened to give him this position" into text as he reveals way too much about the murder, and how he's totally fine now that dissidents have been rounded up, and oh could Kahlan possibly come with him tonight for a quick lay? He's the most powerful man in the Westlands:

quote:

Michael's smile melted. "You should find better friends. No good can come of spending your time with that contrary old man." He turned back to Kahlan. "You, my dear, will be my guest tonight."

"I have other arrangements," she said warily.

Michael reached around her with both arms, cupped both hands to her bottom and pulled the lower half of her body hard against him. His leg pressed between her thighs. "Change them." His smile was as cold as winter night.

"Remove. Your. Hands." Her voice was hard and dangerous. Each stared into the other's eyes.

Richard was dumbfounded. He couldn't believe what his brother was doing. "Michael! Stop it!"

They both ignored him and continued to confront one another, faces close, eyes locked together. Richard stood next to them, feeling helpless. He could sense that both wanted him to stay out of it. His body tensed, muscles hard, readying to disregard the feeling.

"You feel good," Michael whispered. "I think I could fall in love with you."

Kahlan's breathing was slow and restrained. "You do not know the half of it." Her voice was even and controlled. "Now, remove your hands."

When he did not, she slowly placed the fingernail of her first finger on his chest, just below the hollow at the base of his neck. As they glared at each other, she slowly, ever so slowly, began to drag her nail downward, ripping his flesh open. Blood ran down skin in rivulets. For a brief moment, Michael didn't move, but then his eyes could not disguise the pain. He flung open his arms and staggered back a step.

Without looking back, Kahlan stormed out of the house.

Richard gave his brother an angry glare he could not suppress, and followed her out.

We're only three chapters in and we're already getting uncomfortably rapey.

claw game handjob fucked around with this message at 02:26 on Oct 2, 2014

# ? Oct 1, 2014 23:45

Grimpond: Dec 24, 2013

Should I care enough to go look up what objectivism is? I never really thought to learn anything about the author or his beliefs.

Good write-ups so far though

# ? Oct 2, 2014 00:31

claw game handjob: Mar 27, 2007; pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

"gently caress You, Got Mine".

That's it. That's Objectivism. It is literally "care about nobody but yourself, and abuse everything you can to get an edge". It came out of Ayn Rand's crazy head.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 00:32

Grimpond: Dec 24, 2013

Oh. Uh. Hmmmmm.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 00:33

Tulul: Oct 23, 2013; THAT SOUND WILL FOLLOW ME TO HELL.

Grimpond posted:

Should I care enough to go look up what objectivism is? I never really thought to learn anything about the author or his beliefs.

Basically, Ayn Rand (a woman, incidentally) grew up in the Soviet Union, and she loving hated communism. Her "philosophy" is therefore pretty much a rabid rejection of communism, swinging as far away from it as you can towards capitalism. The individual genius superman is the savior of society, capitalism is Good and Correct and will allow the superman's ideas to flourish, and the only moral principle to follow is to make yourself happy.

If you think that sounds like something a dumb selfish rear end in a top hat would spout, congrats, you understand that objectivism is followed by dumb selfish assholes. It's really had staying power because it appeals to those who are rich; it tells them that they are morally in the right for being rich, that they are smart (otherwise they wouldn't be rich), and that they have zero reason to help out the less fortunate, because those greedy poor fucks are obviously dumb, or they would just bootstrap themselves into being rich.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 00:43

Grimpond: Dec 24, 2013

oh, so it's a rand thing, huh. I've never had any reason to read up on her so far either, outside of being made aware that john galt is a 'thing'.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 00:59

claw game handjob: Mar 27, 2007; pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

There are later super-obvious comparisons to Rand's novels and writings in Sword of Truth, but right now it's still kiiiiiinda-couched in fantasyland speak.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 01:02

Sionak: Dec 20, 2005; Mind flay the gap.

Pimpmust posted:

Does this have a talking... dinosaur that loving "luves" Richard Cypher: Our Hero(tm)? I remember some read-through/mockery of this series that brought it up

And apparently Goodkind pillages quite a few plot-points from the Wheel of Time (but with more bondage), of all things.

Could this possibly be on par with GOR! for the "so lovely it's funny" awards?

I think it's a gargoyle? All I remember is that the baby-talking monster thing was the point where it just seemed too stupid altogether and I stopped reading.

From everything else I've seen about the series, I should be grateful to it for that.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 03:56

Pimpmust: Oct 1, 2008

DARKSEID DICK PICS posted:

"gently caress You, Got Mine".

That's it. That's Objectivism. It is literally "care about nobody but yourself, and abuse everything you can to get an edge". It came out of Ayn Rand's crazy head.

Sounds remarkably similar to certain strains of Satanism when you put it like that :devil:

# ? Oct 2, 2014 05:54

Gravy Train Robber: Sep 15, 2007; by zen death robot

Pimpmust posted:

Sounds remarkably similar to certain strains of Satanism when you put it like that

LaVey was pretty much inspired by Ayn Rand and objectivism.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 05:56

Night10194: Feb 13, 2012; We'll start,
like many good things,
with a bear.

You fuckers weren't kidding. He's going to outlaw fire. Holy poo poo this is hilarious. I can just see the author's wheels turning. "How can I explain how foolish it would be to outlaw things that kill people? AH YES! FIRE!"

# ? Oct 2, 2014 06:03

That Old Tree: Jun 24, 2012; nah

Gotta be honest, I completely forgot Michael existed or that he, uh, made campaign promises "against" fire. I remember lots of magical bullshit going on at the border of the Westlands and stuff, but it seems like the Westland itself pretty much disappears for most of the series after the start of the first book.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 06:07

Small Strange Bird: Sep 22, 2006; Merci, chaton!

Discovering that the story is set in the "Midlands" is now making me picture everyone speaking with broad Brummie accents. :britain:

# ? Oct 2, 2014 08:15

Pimpmust: Oct 1, 2008

Night10194 posted:

You fuckers weren't kidding. He's going to outlaw fire. Holy poo poo this is hilarious. I can just see the author's wheels turning. "How can I explain how foolish it would be to outlaw things that kill people? AH YES! FIRE!"

It wowould've been funnier if the mother had drowned, missed opportunity there.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 11:27

potatocubed: Jul 26, 2012; *rathian noises*

Man, I don't remember any of this from the time I read Wizard's First Rule way back when. The 'ban fire!' thing is so transparently meant to be equivalent to the gun control argument that I don't know how I missed it.

I think I managed to get some way into book 3 before I got sick of a) waiting for Richard to be wrong about something (anything) and b) Goodkind's habit of pulling yet more bullshit powers out of his protagonists' asses whenever something might plausibly threaten them.

E: In fact, all I do remember are the BDSM cult, the twist ending, and being frustrated with the poor storytelling.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 12:30

neonchameleon: Nov 14, 2012

potatocubed posted:

Man, I don't remember any of this from the time I read Wizard's First Rule way back when. The 'ban fire!' thing is so transparently meant to be equivalent to the gun control argument that I don't know how I missed it.

Because it's a terrible enough analogy that it does nothing except makes those who use it seem ... divorced from reality. I missed it because the "Must Have Guns!" lobby is not a thing in my country.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 14:21

Kellsterik: Mar 30, 2012

The straight faced rejoinder that "anger killed mom, not fire" only makes the argument more insane.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 14:52

TheCenturion: May 3, 2013; HI I LIKE TO GIVE ADVICE ON RELATIONSHIPS

Sionak posted:

I think it's a gargoyle? All I remember is that the baby-talking monster thing was the point where it just seemed too stupid altogether and I stopped reading.

From everything else I've seen about the series, I should be grateful to it for that.

It's a Gar. He kills it's mother, but can't bear to kill the baby, so he kinda raises it.

In the short term, it turns into a Saturday morning cartoon style VERY IMPORTANT LESSON about how sometimes you have to do things people don't like for their own good.

Later on, it turns out to be the fulfillment of prophesy that isn't quite prophesy as Gratch leads an army of gars at Richard's side.

'Gratch lurrg Ratch-argggg'.

When it comes to prophecy in the books,
I did kinda like how it was reduced to basic computer programming. But again, the objectivism comes through, as unless you're one of the OVERMEN, prophecy is ultimately meaningless to you.

Hmm. Do we need to be spoilering things? Overall plot? Things that happen eight books down the road?

# ? Oct 2, 2014 15:42

Pimpmust: Oct 1, 2008

"Spoilers" are fine, no one is gonna give a gently caress and still read the thread.

This thread is lacking in pictures of the man himself, although surprisingly hard to find any decent sized ones.

For some reason he dresses like an extra from the Matrix movies.

And he really likes to :colbert:

These are pretty nice gems too:
"The books I write are first of all novels, not fantasy, and that is deliberate; I'm really writing books about human beings."

"To define me as a fantasy writer is to misunderstand the context of my books by misidentifying their fundamentals."

"The stories I'm telling are not fantasy-driven, they're character-driven, and the characters I want to write about could be set in any world. I'd like to address a broader audience."

""What I have done with my work has irrevocably changed the face of fantasy. In so doing I've raised the standards. I have not only injected thought into a tired empty genre, but, more importantly, I've transcended it showing what more it can be . . ."

Pimpmust fucked around with this message at 16:43 on Oct 2, 2014

# ? Oct 2, 2014 16:41

dwarf74: Sep 2, 2012; Buglord

Pimpmust posted:

""What I have done with my work has irrevocably changed the face of fantasy. In so doing I've raised the standards. I have not only injected thought into a tired empty genre, but, more importantly, I've transcended it showing what more it can be . . ."

Holy poo poo. That's something from a dude who writes terrible, shallow books.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 16:49

claw game handjob: Mar 27, 2007; pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

Pimpmust posted:

And he really likes to

This picture is the inside-flap "About the Author" image going all the way back to 1994.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 18:10

Grimpond: Dec 24, 2013

hahaha, wow, I never made the connection between the 'ban fire' and gun control. Is that seriously what its supposed to be about?

# ? Oct 2, 2014 18:18

Toph Bei Fong: Feb 29, 2008

Grimpond posted:

hahaha, wow, I never made the connection between the 'ban fire' and gun control. Is that seriously what its supposed to be about?

Somehow.

Which is insane, because in a pre-industrial society without electric stoves, microwaves, etc. it will mean that everyone in the town will soon be dying from eating raw meat or will be turning vegetarian. Also, most industry, from blacksmithing to tanning to canning food to mining, will have to be shut down. No light sources after dark, either, so the security of the town will plummet...

It is a bad analogy written by a bad writer to showcase his bad idea. In the real world, no matter how popular, Michael would be laughed off stage for the tasteless punchline to such a moving lead-up, and his political career would be over instantly.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 19:44

Grimpond: Dec 24, 2013

Spoilers Below posted:

Somehow.

Which is insane, because in a pre-industrial society without electric stoves, microwaves, etc. it will mean that everyone in the town will soon be dying from eating raw meat or will be turning vegetarian. Also, most industry, from blacksmithing to tanning to canning food to mining, will have to be shut down. No light sources after dark, either, so the security of the town will plummet...

It is a bad analogy written by a bad writer to showcase his bad idea. In the real world, no matter how popular, Michael would be laughed off stage for the tasteless punchline to such a moving lead-up, and his political career would be over instantly.

incredible. I wonder what else I've forgotten about this series

# ? Oct 2, 2014 19:47

Pimpmust: Oct 1, 2008

I am completely new to this "book"-thing and especially "f-a-n-t-a-s-y" but boy do I want to try some great piece of litterature out! Let's see what my favourite recommendation site Goodreads has to say!!

Oooh what's this book 4.11 out of 5?? amazing, let's see what the 5/5 crowd thinks so I know if it's any good!!

Dave, a simple name, I like Dave oh he must have good opinions?

quote:

Dave rated it 5 of 5 stars
The sheer depth of Wizard's First Rule is simply amazing. His characters are unique and original, yet seem simple when you realize that they aren't perfect. Every chapter you read will cling you tighter to his series. Of course, many will dislike Terry Goodkind's works, either because he establishes dead on ethics in an 'I'm right, your wrong' approach, or because of dissatisfaction with his writing style, but it would be a baseless altercation to state that he is a run-in-the-mill, and mediocre author. Terry Goodkind deserves nothing but praise for this extraordinary novel.

79 likes

Thanks Dave!

Oh who's this, James? I know a James! Did he read this too??

quote:

James rated it 5 of 5 stars

Excellent series of contemporary fantasy. Goodkind's books always center around difficult moral or social concepts that are put to the test by believable characters. The theme of Goodkind's books is that people should be true to themselves, not sacrificing their beliefs for conformist ideals or things that sound appealing but have no grounding in reality. To truly live one's life is what is most important. Towards the end of the series, this theme tends to get a little preachy and starts to lean towards agnosticism. Still, definitely worth reading to the end. There are a lot of good ideas and messages that anyone can take out of Goodkind's books. One caution, because Goodkind loves to preach about the sanctity of life, there are frequent depictions and images of those who would desecrate life, through murder, torture, rape, etc. Goodkind uses these in contrast to the heroes of the books who uphold moral standards and value life. Sometimes the images are intense, but the ones that may questionable are few in number.

I like Morals! and life!

Not rape though, but I guess that's fine. Hmm, I want something longer to really help me settle my mind here...

ooooh this one is long. Terrence? Lay it down like you mean it!!

quote:

Terrence rated it 5 of 5 stars

I was recommended by my friend to read this book. She exclaimed that Terry Goodkind's imagination was second to none. Hearing such high acclaim from my friend, I agreed to give Wizard's First Rule a try.

At first, I found it very hard to believe that such a clich� book with non-original character and plots could make such an impression. This impression quickly changed. How it did, I still do not know. Perhaps it was simply Goodkind's descriptive words that fluidly described every colourful event that takes place, and amplifies every emotion felt by characters in the story.

Later in the book, I found out that this story was not to be taken lightly. It is not a book for children like I first thought, but instead a book with very violent and complicated woven plots. Its constant theme, the sacrifice of few for the greater collective, is constantly explored, often in heartbreaking ways.

I quickly grew an affiliation for Richard and Kahlan, the main characters. I was able to witness their forbidden love, how they wanted each other so badly yet wasn't able to have the other. Although they have very clich� personalities, the manner of which Goodkind makes them act makes them much more alive and interesting.

It also must be noted that Goodkind adds several creative elements and objects that is purely original and not seen (not that I have anyway) in other fantasy novels. The power of the Sword of Truth and the Confesser's powers are entirely new to the world of fantasy. Other creations with these included, created a vibrant new world that we cannot have possibly seen ourselves.

Wizard's First Rule is still not comparable to Tolkien's epic Lord of the Rings series, but it stands very high above the plethora of other fantasy novels. I am very excited to read the second book in the Sword of Truth series and am hoping that it will be as good as the first.

Not a book for children? A story not to be taken lightly!? Oh boy! I'm going to love this!

You know what else I like? Cum...mings, let's see what he got to say!

quote:

Dean Cummings rated it 5 of 5 stars

I have currently read over 200 fantasy novels, and Wizard's First Rule, the subsequent novel, Stone of Tears and the fifth novel in the saga entitled Faith of the Fallen, are all 10/10 star ratings earning a special spot next to Lord of the Rings. This novel is pure magic from the first page, complete with every aspect a fantasy reader craves: adventure, philosophy, a deep sense of humanity and rightness, morality, passion, love, camaraderie, bravery and honour. This novel and several of the other novels in this series are sure to become fantasy classics for the ages. Terry Goodkind has truly earned his rightful position as a first-rank author

(To be fair, there's plenty of more... critical reviews, but god drat)

# ? Oct 2, 2014 20:04

TheCenturion: May 3, 2013; HI I LIKE TO GIVE ADVICE ON RELATIONSHIPS

Look, the first three books, and the last three books are fun reads, if you don't squint too hard. I haven't even bothered with the post-SoT series, I have to admit, but I don't take umbrage to them; he clearly said 'I'm done with THIS storyline; I'm not done with R&K.'

The middle four books or whatever, though, get heavy-handed. Oh, and a major multi-book plot point is resolved by somebody comparing some dates.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 20:09

Robotic Folksinger: Jun 27, 2008; I guess a robot would have to be crazy to wanna be a folksinger

Micheal was trying to ban fire? I thought he was just gonna make a committee on fire safety or something like that.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 20:23

thespaceinvader: Mar 30, 2011; The slightest touch from a Gol-Shogeg will result in Instant Death!

Sad thing is, I quite liked this series when I was a kid (read the first one at maybe 12 or 13 I think, possibly a little younger). I never read books too deeply back then, I tended to skim them, so I probably missed quite a lot.

And it turns out, yes, I missed quite a lot!

It definitely gets worse and harder to get through as it goes on.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 21:06

Pimpmust: Oct 1, 2008

Robotic Folksinger posted:

Micheal was trying to ban fire? I thought he was just gonna make a committee on fire safety or something like that.

Truly a leader of the ages.

"No, no! I said a *Juice* committee.

What the hell am I supposed to do with this enormous pile of corpses?

The district heating system? Hmm, well it could work... "

So it was that Dick Cypher's mom; Bagina Cypher, ultimately died in a tragic, committee caused, accident.
Quite ironic, you see, considering that it wasn't actually *anger* that caused her death after all, but fire. Lots of fire.
And something about things coming full circle.
And the Evil of Big Government.
Also :godwinning:

# ? Oct 2, 2014 21:15

claw game handjob: Mar 27, 2007; pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

Who wants to meet an old man? Let's meet an old man. But first, more ham-handedness.

quote:

"You seem to know a lot about people. You're very perceptive, I mean about why they do what they do."

She shrugged. "I guess."

He tore little pieces off the leaf. "Is that why they hunt you?"

She looked over as they walked, and when his eyes came to her, she answered. "They hunt me because they fear truth. One reason I trust you is because you do not."

He smiled at the compliment. He liked the answer, even though he wasn't sure what it meant. "You aren't about to kick me, are you?"

A grin came to her face. "You are getting close." She thought a moment, the smile fading, and went on. "I am sorry, Richard, but for now you must trust me. The more I tell you, the greater the danger, to both of us. Still friends?"

"Still friends." He threw the skeleton of the leaf away. "But someday you will tell me all of it?"

She nodded. "If I can, I promise I will."

"Good," he said cheerfully. "After all, I am a 'seeker of truth.'"

Kahlan jerked to a halt, grabbed his shirtsleeve, and spun him to face her wide eyes. "Why did you say that?" she demanded.

"What? You mean 'seeker of truth'? That's what Zedd calls me. Ever since I was little. He says I always insist on knowing the truth of things, so he calls me 'seeker of truth.'" He was surprised by her agitation. His eyes narrowed. "Why?"

She started walking again. "Never mind."

Somehow, he seemed to have broached a sensitive subject. His need to know the answers started to shoulder its way around in his mind. They hunted her because they feared truth, he thought, and she became upset when he said he was a "seeker of truth." Maybe she had become upset, he decided, because it made her fear for him, too.

"Can you at least tell me who 'they' are? Those who hunt you?"

She continued to watch the road as she walked next to him. He didn't know if she was going to answer him, but at last she did.

"They are the followers of a very wicked man. His name is Darken Rahl. Please do not ask me any more for now; I do not wish to think of him."

Darken Rahl. So, now he knew the name.

Yes, that's right, our main villain is named Darken Rahl.

quote:

Richard was eager to get home. Along with his knife and the other things he had forgotten to take along, there was something else he had to have, a very important thing his father had given him.

His father had made him the guardian of a secret, made him the keeper of a secret book, and had given Richard something to keep always, as proof to the true owner of the book, that it was not stolen, but rescued for safekeeping. It was a triangular-shaped tooth, three fingers wide. Richard had strung a leather thong to it so he could wear it around his neck, but like his knife and backpack he had stupidly left the house without it. He was impatient to have it back around his neck; without it, his father would be a thief, just as Michael said.

So on the way to Richard's cabin (which he has carefully strung spiderweb along as an early-warning system, Kahlan keeps running into them), he realizes someone has been there, because she's suddenly out of webs to hit when they near the house. Richard is kind of a dick for not telling her about the webs, incidentally. C'mon, man. Once again, she manages to outsmart our genius tracker, telling him "Hey, didn't your dad just have HIS house broken into before getting murdered? Maybe this is a similar kind of trap. Don't go in the front door." He heads around the house and sure enough, she's right.

One near-fuckup as a squirrel almost rats him out later, he grabs his backpack and the aforementioned tooth, but can't get to the knife without risking alerting the intruder, some schmuck we never see who's chilling in Richard's favorite chair. Instead, they leave and head for Zedd's house, and Richard gets all mopey every step of the way.

quote:

The tooth hanging around his neck nagged at him. His secrets nagged at him. He wished his father had never made him the keeper of the secret book. A thought that had occurred to him back at his house, but he had ignored, forced itself to the front of his mind. The books at his house looked like they had been torn apart in a rage. Maybe because none was the right book. What if it was the secret book they were looking for? But that was impossible; no one but the true owner even knew of the book.

And his father� and himself� and the thing the tooth came from. The thought was too farfetched to consider, so he decided he wouldn't. He tried very hard not to.

Most of this chapter is silent narration, by the by. Occasionally one of them asks the other something that they refuse to answer plainly. OR... they could give supremely unhelpful advice to keep one another alive in cryptic ways!

quote:

Just before he went through the brush into the clearing he stopped to swat a fly that was biting his neck.
Kahlan grabbed his wrist in midswat.

Her other hand clamped over his mouth.

He went rigid.

Looking into his eyes, she shook her head, then released his wrist, putting the hand behind his head while continuing to keep her other hand over his mouth. By the expression on her face he knew she was terrified he would make a sound. She slowly lowered him to the ground, and by his cooperation he let her know he would obey.

Her eyes held him as hard as her hands. Continuing to watch his eyes, she put her face so close to his he could feel the warmth of her breath on his cheek.

"Listen to me." Her whisper was so low he had to concentrate to hear her. "Do exactly as I say." The expression on her face made him afraid to blink. "Do not move. No matter what happens do not move. Or we are dead." She waited. He gave a small nod. "Let the flies bite. Or we are dead." She waited again. He gave another small nod.

With a flick of her eyes she indicated for him to look across the clearing. He slowly moved his head just a little so he could see. There was nothing. She kept her hand over his mouth. He heard a few grunts, like a wild boar.

Then he saw it.

He flinched involuntarily. She clamped her hand harder against his mouth.

From across the clearing, fading evening light reflected in two glowing green eyes as their gaze swept in his direction. It stood on two feet, like a man, and was about a head taller than him. He guessed it weighed three times as much. Flies bit his neck, but he tried to ignore them.

He looked back to her eyes. She had not looked to the beast; she knew what waited across the clearing. Instead she continued to watch him, waiting to see if he would react in a way that would betray them. He nodded again to reassure her. Only then did she remove her hand from his mouth and put it over his wrist, holding it to the ground. Trickles of blood ran across her neck as she lay motionless on the soft moss, letting the flies bite. He could feel each sharp sting as they bit his neck. Grunts came short and low, and both turned their heads slightly to see.

With astonishing speed, it charged into the center of the clearing, moving in a shuffling, sideways motion. It grunted as it came. Glowing green eyes searched, while its long tail slowly swished the air. The beast cocked its head to the side and pricked its short, rounded ears ahead, listening. Fur covered the great body everywhere except its chest and stomach, which were covered with a smooth, glossy, pinkish skin that rippled with corded muscles underneath. Flies buzzed around something smeared over the taut skin. Throwing back its head, the beast opened its mouth, hissing into the cold night air. Richard could see the hot breath turning to vapor between teeth as big as his fingers.

To keep from shrieking in terror, Richard concentrated on the pain of the biting flies. They could not sneak away, or run; the thing was that close and, he knew, that fast.

A scream erupted from the ground right in front of them, making Richard flinch. Instantly the beast charged toward the two of them in a sideways run. Kahlan's ringers dug into his wrist, but otherwise she didn't move. Richard was paralyzed as he saw it pounce.

A rabbit, its ears covered with the flies, bolted right in front of them, screaming again, and was swept up and torn in half in a blink. The front half went down in one swallow. The beast stood right over them and tore at the insides of the rabbit, taking some of the gore and smearing it on its pink-skinned chest and stomach. The flies, even the ones biting Richard's and Kahlan's necks, returned to the creature to feast. The rest of the rabbit was taken by each hind leg, ripped in half, and eaten.

When done, the beast cocked its head again, listening. The two of them were right underneath it, both holding their breath. Richard wanted to scream.

Large wings spread from its back. Against the failing light, Richard could see the veins pulsing through the thin membranes that were its wings. The beast took one last look around and skittered sideways across the clearing. It straightened, hopped twice, and flew off, disappearing in the direction of the boundary. The flies were gone with it.

Now, see, I want to give him credit for this scene, because that's kind of a cool bit of buildup and a freaky-rear end creature to boot? But the exposition right after takes a lot of the thrill out of it.

quote:

"Kahlan, what was that thing?"

She sat up, taking a deep breath as she looked down at him. Her hand came up and hooked some of her hair behind her ear; the rest fell forward over her shoulders.

"It was a long-tailed gar."

Reaching out, she picked up one of the biting flies by its wings. Somehow it must have gotten caught in a fold of his shirt and was smashed when he flopped onto his back.

"This is a blood fly. Gars use them to hunt. The flies flush out the quarry, the gar grabs it. They smear some on themselves, for the flies. We are very lucky." She held the blood fly right in front of his nose to make her point. "Long-tailed gars are stupid. If it had been a short-tailed gar, we would be dead right now. Short-tailed gars are bigger, and a lot smarter." She paused to make sure she had his full attention. "They count their flies."

Richard's reply to this is "Okay this is the third time today I've nearly died, when I count ONE the entire rest of my life. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?" Kahlan proceeds to give absolutely no helpful information at all and ask him to make a fire. Chapter 4 ends mid-conversation and picks up one line later. God I hate how this series does chapters.

Finally, after some more woodsiness, we g- hahahaha no we're still not going to address the elephant in the room, have more politics.

quote:

"I've never seen anything like a gar. The Midlands must be a dreadful place."

"There are many dangers in the Midlands." A wistful smile came over her face. "There are also many fantastic and magical things. It is a beautiful, wondrous place. But the gar are not from the Midlands. They are from D'Hara."

He stared in astonishment. "D'Hara! From across the second boundary?"

D'Hara. Until his brother's speech today he had never heard the name spoken in anything other than the cautious whispers of older people. Or in a curse. Kahlan continued to watch the fire.

"Richard�" She paused as if afraid to tell him the rest. "�there is no longer a second boundary. The boundary between the Midlands and D'Hara is down. Since the spring."

That shock made him feel as if the shadowy D'Hara had just taken a frightening, giant leap closer. He struggled to make sense of the things he was learning.

"Maybe my brother is more of a prophet than he knows."

"Maybe," she said noncommittally.

"Although it would be hard to make a living as a prophet by predicting events that had already taken place." He gave her a sidelong glance.

Kahlan smiled as she idly twisted a strand of hair. "When I first saw you, my thought was that you were no fool." Firelight sparkled in her green eyes. "Thank you for not proving me wrong."

"Michael is in a position to have knowledge others don't. Maybe he's trying to prepare the people, get them used to the idea, so when they find out, they won't panic."

Michael often said that information was the coin of power, and that it was not a coin to be spent frivolously. After he had become a councilor, he encouraged people to bring their information to him first. Even a farmer with a tale received an ear, and if the tale proved true, a favor.

From here we segue into The History of The (name)Lands. I am going to summarize because this goes on a while, anything in italics is a direct quote:

In the Westlands, nobody teaches the kids what the hell the boundaries are or any sort of history. Richard is literally the only youth who ever asked about this, because Kids These Days, but adults would never tell him anything but excuses.
Zedd and Richard's father came from the Midlands. Neither would tell Richard anything when asked, but Zedd got extra-salty about it with his deflections.
Long ago "in the time before [Richard and Kahlan's] parents were born", a man named Panis Rahl became King poo poo of D'Hara Mountain, and proceeded to conquer everything in the region, thus turning the third land from "D'Hara" into "The D'Haran Empire". The Midlands all banded together to fight back against this, because they might have hated one another, but they hated NOT BEING FREE more.
Eventually, Panis goes "Wait, this is pre-boundaries and there is magic EVERY-loving-WHERE", and he begins waging war with horrible things like the Shadow People, who are shades, but because that's not cool enough, "[their] touch caused the whole person's body to blister and swell and finally split open". THIS is what finally makes a single wizard join the Midlands' side.
The solution to the shadow people problem: magic horns that blow them away into dust when you blow on them. I am not making this up.
That single invention is enough to push the D'Haran army back, and the boundaries are created. The Midlands stay as a now-council of squabbling kingdoms, D'Hara is sealed on the far-east of the continent, and the Westlands become the place where everyone with PTSD around magic heads because gently caress MAGIC.
The boundaries are literally holes in reality where the world of the living is overlaid with the underworld itself, because this is an entirely reasonable idea to wizards.

At this point, talking about the boundaries gives KAHLAN magical PTSD and she nearly has her soul sucked out because Richard is too good at asking questions. No, really.

quote:

"How do you do that?" she asked in a soft voice.

"Do what?"

"How do you ask questions that fill my mind with pictures and make me answer, even when I have no intention to?"

He shrugged, a little self-conscious. "Zedd asks me that too. I guess it's just something I was born with. Sometimes I think it's a curse." He turned from the fire to face her again. "I'm sorry, Kahlan, for asking you what you saw there. It was a thoughtless thing to do. Sometimes my common sense doesn't keep up with my curiosity. I'm sorry I brought you pain. You being pulled back into the underworld, though, that shouldn't have happened, should it?"

"No, it shouldn't. It was almost as if when I thought back to what I had seen, someone was waiting to pull me back. I fear if you hadn't been here, I might have been lost there. In the darkness, I saw a light. Something you did brought me back."

Richard picked up the spoon while he thought. "Maybe just that you weren't alone."

Kahlan gave a weak shrug. "Maybe."

At this point, Panis has his revenge, sending a quad to kill the great wizard's wife and kid, and in a few years' time he leaves the Midlands because now that they are a government they become corrupt and use magic wrong somehow.

quote:

"At first everything was fine, but then the council of the Midlands started taking actions the great wizard said were corrupt. Something to do with the magic. He found out the council had reneged on agreements about how the power of magic was to be controlled. He told them that their greed and the things they were doing would lead to worse horrors than those put down in the wars. They thought they knew better than he how the magic should be managed. They made a political appointment of a very important position that was a wizard's and a wizard's alone to fill. He was furious, he told them the position was one for which only a wizard could find the right person, and the appointment only a wizard's to make. The great wizard had trained other wizards, but in their greed, these others sided with the council. He was enraged. He said his wife and daughter had died for nothing. As punishment, the great wizard told them he would do the worst thing possible to them; he would leave them to suffer the consequence of their actions."

Richard smiled. That sounded like something Zedd would say.

"He said that if they knew so well how things were to be done, they did not need him. He refused to help them further, and vanished. But as he left, he cast a wizard's web�"

"What's that, a wizard's web?"

"It is a spell a wizard casts. As he left, he cast a wizard's web over everyone, making them forget his name, even what he looked like. So that is why no one knows what his name is or who he is."

GEE. I WONDER.

Soooooo some people have been mentioning the huge undercurrent of how pacifism is the worst thing imaginable (which is, again, Objectivist in nature!) in these novels. Let's see the part where it begins!

quote:

"At the beginning of last winter, the movement started."

He backed the spoonful of soup away from his mouth as he looked up. "What movement?"

"The Darken Rahl movement. It seemed to spring up out of nowhere. All of a sudden crowds of people in the bigger cities were chanting his name, calling him 'Father Rahl,' calling him the greatest man of peace that ever lived. The strange thing is, he is the son of Panis Rahl, from D'Hara, on the other side of the boundary, so how did anyone even know anything about him?" She paused, allowing him to ponder the significance of this.

"But how did they get across the boundary?"

"It was weakening, only no one knew it. As it weakened, it faded from the top first, so the gars could fly over. In the spring it faded completely away. Then the People's Peace Army, Darken Rahl's army, marched right into the bigger cities. Instead of fighting him, crowds of Midlanders threw flowers at them wherever they went. People who didn't throw flowers were hung."

Richard stared wide-eyed. "The army killed them?"

She looked at him hard. "No. The flower throwers did. Said they were a threat to peace, so they killed them. The People's Peace Army never had to lift a finger. The movement said that proved Darken Rahl only wanted peace, since his army didn't kill the dissenters. After a time, the army stepped in and stopped the killing. Instead, the dissenters were sent to the schools of enlightenment to learn about the greatness of Father Rahl, about what a man of peace he is."

"And did they learn at these schools of enlightenment how great Darken Rahl is?"

"No one is as fanatical as a convert. Most just sit around all day, chanting his name."

"So the Midlands didn't fight back?"

"Darken Rahl went before the council and asked them to join him in an alliance of peace. Those who did were held up as champions of harmony. Those who did not were held up as traitors, and publicly executed on the spot by Darken Rahl himself."

"How did�"

She held up her hand and closed her eyes. "Darken Rahl has a curved knife he keeps at his belt. He takes great pleasure in using it. Please, Richard, do not ask me to tell you what he did to those men. My stomach cannot bear its recounting."

"I was going to ask how the wizards reacted to all this."

"Oh. Well, it started to open their eyes. Rahl then outlawed the use of all magic and declared anyone using it an insurrectionist. You must understand that in the Midlands magic is a part of many people, many creatures. It would be like saying you are a criminal for having two arms and two legs, and must have them cut them off. Then he outlawed fire."

His eyes came up from the soup. "Fire? Why?"

"Darken Rahl does not explain his orders. But wizards use fire. Even so he does not fear wizards. He has more power than his father ever did, more than any wizard. His followers give all kinds of reasons, the main one being that it was used against Darken Rahl's father, so fire is a sign of disrespect to the house of Rahl."

At this point we go into a weird segment where Richard defends his brother against the obvious, even telling a story of how Michael clearly cheated some motherfuckers to sell some of his father's merchandise much better than he ever could (getting 4 gold pieces instead of 1 for a vase barely worth that), an act that made George Cypher forbid Michael to ever take part in his business dealings again. This makes Michael a good person? Maybe? Because when Dad next left, Michael paid off the family's entire debts with the spare money. I honestly don't know whether we're supposed to find Michael an rear end in a top hat or a quiet saint for this, given the tone of the story.

We finally end the chapter when Kahlan finishes the exposition-load, and lets loose a ~~fairy in a jar~~ Night Wisp in a bottle, her guide across the boundary, to die in freedom for its help. It proceeds to spit prophecy for ten pages. Here are the only relevant bits for this novel.

quote:

Richard stared. "But� is there nothing we can do?"

The tiny point of light spun again, coming closer to him this time before stopping. "Better question, Richard Cypher. The answer you want is within yourself. You must seek it. You must seek it or he will kill you both. Soon."

"How soon?" His voice turned harder; he couldn't help himself. The light backed away a little as it spun. He would not let this opportunity go without finding out at least something he could hold on to.

The night wisp stopped. "The first day of winter, Richard Cypher. When the sun is in the sky. If Darken Rahl does not kill you before then, and if he is not stopped, then on the first day of winter when the sun is in the sky, my kind will all die. You both will die. He will enjoy it."

[Richard wanders off to let the two talk alone.]

"Others might tell him before you do, Confessor Kahlan. That would be worse."

She looked up at the night wisp, her eyes wet. "I will tell him before that happens."

"You play a dangerous game, Confessor Kahlan," Shar warned. "He could fall in love with you first. Then your telling would hurt him unforgivably."

"I won't let that happen."

"You will choose him?"

"No!"

The night wisp spun back at the sound of Kahlan's shriek, then slowly came back by her face. "Confessor Kahlan, you are the last of your kind. Darken Rahl has killed all the others. Even your sister, Dennee. You are the Mother Confessor. You must choose a mate."

"I could not do that to someone I cared for. No Confessor would," she sobbed.

"Sorry, Mother Confessor. It is for you to choose."

Finally, the wisp asks her to use a Confessor's power on her, so she dies not knowing the loneliness of being the only night wisp around. Shar becomes hopelessly in love with Kahlan for ten seconds after "the thunder without lightning" is unleashed, and dies. The chapter ends with Richard returning to camp and the pair sleeping.

We are 5 chapters in and holy god that was a long history lesson. And we still haven't met the old man.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 23:42

dwarf74: Sep 2, 2012; Buglord

I remember thinking Gars were legitimately cool and a neat idea.

gently caress the rest of it, but Gars are neat.

# ? Oct 2, 2014 23:54

claw game handjob: Mar 27, 2007; pinch pinch scrape pinch
ow ow fuck it's caught
i'm bleeding
JESUS TURN IT OFF
WHY ARE YOU STILL SMILING

It's just... the fact that she even gives a dramatic pause that the text points out for that lovely delivery. "Small gars COUNT THEIR FLIES."

# ? Oct 2, 2014 23:57

ProfessorCirno: Feb 17, 2011; The strongest! The smartest!
The rightest!

I'm pretty sure we are almost at the point where I found this book too boring to continue. I had lovely enough taste to read Xanth throughout middle school, I read TONS of terrible Star Wars EU books, I had collections of Forgotten Realms and Magic books, and this piece of poo poo didn't even make it halfway through before I called it quits.

Like the thing with all the political bullshit is that it's dumb and boring if you aren't already a hardcore believer. Outlawing fire is loving stupid if you don't know it's meant to tie in to GUN CONTROL. "PACIFISTS ARE THE REAL ENEMIES BECAUSE THEY HANG PEOPLE is loving stupid if you're just scratching your head going "well uh, they aren't really pacifists then, are they?"

# ? Oct 3, 2014 00:12

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 26, 2024 09:53

Kellsterik: Mar 30, 2012

ProfessorCirno posted:

"PACIFISTS ARE THE REAL ENEMIES BECAUSE THEY HANG PEOPLE is loving stupid if you're just scratching your head going "well uh, they aren't really pacifists then, are they?"

Wasn't this a thing in the Yuuzhan Vong era EU books as well? I think there was an evil peace movement that just wanted the Vong to win. Turns out that when you create every detail of the world and its history, you can make people who don't like war look pretty stupid!

# ? Oct 3, 2014 00:18

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > Let's Read the Sword of Truth books! (Or not. Can we not?)

«‹›173 »