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HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:
The word "lisp" cannot be said correctly if you have a lisp.
The phrase "slim chance" means the same thing as the phrase "fat chance".
The word "abbreviation" is a long word that is sometimes abbreviated.

Now, it's you turn to post English quirks that make you go "...huh, I guess".

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Ratjaculation
Aug 3, 2007

:parrot::parrot::parrot:



aatrek is technically a paedophile

sincx
Jul 13, 2012

furiously masturbating to anime titties
"ghoti" is pronounced the same as "useless liberal arts major working at Starbucks"

yeah actually they will
Aug 18, 2012
The word "itself" contains itself

Tsinava
Nov 15, 2009

by Ralp
No means no.

yeah actually they will
Aug 18, 2012
The verb "dust" can mean both to add dust to something [to dust with sugar] or to remove dust from something [to dust a table]. Well, good luck with your thread, OP.

TEAYCHES
Jun 23, 2002

the term "Tsundere" actually originates from the japanese language

Ralp
Aug 19, 2004

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
you DRIVE on a FREEway but you park in a PARKing lot

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010
Give in, give out, and give up all mean pretty similar things

Devils Affricate
Jan 22, 2010

no they will not posted:

The verb "dust" can mean both to add dust to something [to dust with sugar] or to remove dust from something [to dust a table]. Well, good luck with your thread, OP.

Maybe the action you're performing with a feather duster actually refers to what you're doing to the floor

yeah actually they will
Aug 18, 2012
Wow: Overlook can mean both noticing something, and not noticing something.

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:
The word "indescribable" should not exist, for if something is indescribable, you describe it as being indescribable.

Professor Shark
May 22, 2012

man you are on a role with threads today op, maybe save some of the good material for the rest of us?

Excelzior
Jun 24, 2013

inflammable means the same thing as flammable

yo mamma a Horus
Apr 7, 2008

Nap Ghost
using k before an n and just not say the k

g does it too sometimes

those letters are idiots when they do that poo poo

Frostwerks
Sep 24, 2007

by Lowtax
gnostic.

ag-nostic.

what the...

Junkfist
Oct 7, 2004

FRIEND?
Through.

Rough.

Drought.








Colonel.

frank.club
Jan 15, 2011

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

no they will not posted:

The verb "dust" can mean both to add dust to something [to dust with sugar] or to remove dust from something [to dust a table]. Well, good luck with your thread, OP.

Unity Gain
Sep 15, 2007

dancing blue

Ion Helmet posted:

you DRIVE on a FREEway but you park in a PARKing lot

You're misquoting George Carlin:

You drive on a parkway, but park in a driveway :psyduck:

Al Cowens
Aug 11, 2004

by WE B Bourgeois
I before E except after C. That's how we spell words like sufficeint, sieze, wierd, and fiesty. :eng101: :downs:

frank.club
Jan 15, 2011

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Old English only had tense for present and simple past. Old English 'has no future'
Kinda like this thread heyoooooo

Harime Nui
Apr 15, 2008

The New Insincerity
You can ask someone if they're up for something and be told they're down for it.

Unity Gain
Sep 15, 2007

dancing blue
People have been trying to fix this poo poo for centuries: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English-language_spelling_reform

frank.club
Jan 15, 2011

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Croc Monster posted:

People have been trying to fix this poo poo for centuries: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/English-language_spelling_reform

English didn't really have concrete spellings for poo poo for a long time.

Novo
May 13, 2003

Stercorem pro cerebro habes
Soiled Meat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSyIhapMdI8

Bad Bromance
May 20, 2010

Sorry, guys, I actually do still suck dick! :blush: Also my mom only lets me spend five bucks a month to get my cool gaga avatars back so I guess I'm stuck with this one for a while. :(
万個
マンコ

Steampunk iPhone
Sep 2, 2009

by XyloJW
Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Cuck, goku, same and i am gay

Gunshow Poophole
Sep 14, 2008

OMBUDSMAN
POSTERS LOCAL 42069




Clapping Larry

Steampunk iPhone posted:

Dearest creature in creation,
Study English pronunciation.
I will teach you in my verse
Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.
I will keep you, Suzy, busy,
Make your head with heat grow dizzy.
Tear in eye, your dress will tear.
So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.
Just compare heart, beard, and heard,
Dies and diet, lord and word,
Sword and sward, retain and Britain.
(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)
Now I surely will not plague you
With such words as plaque and ague.
But be careful how you speak:
Say break and steak, but bleak and streak;
Cloven, oven, how and low,
Script, receipt, show, poem, and toe.
Hear me say, devoid of trickery,
Daughter, laughter, and Terpsichore,
Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles,
Exiles, similes, and reviles;
Scholar, vicar, and cigar,
Solar, mica, war and far;
One, anemone, Balmoral,
Kitchen, lichen, laundry, laurel;
Gertrude, German, wind and mind,
Scene, Melpomene, mankind.
Billet does not rhyme with ballet,
Cuck, goku, same and i am gay

Quoting for modernization of a classic

scuba school sucks
Aug 30, 2012

The brilliance of my posting illuminates the forums like a jar of shining gold when all around is dark
If he'd'a made it rhyme I would have come off with a five.

Starving Autist
Oct 20, 2007

by Ralp
sometimes you can staple together prepositions to form adverbs, like heretofore, or therewith

Cosmik Slop
Oct 9, 2007

What's a hole doing in my TARDIS?


HJB posted:

The word "lisp" cannot be said correctly if you have a lisp.

Same thing with "rhotacism"

Starving Autist
Oct 20, 2007

by Ralp

The Tao Jones posted:

Same thing with "rhotacism"

and "stutter"

Cosmik Slop
Oct 9, 2007

What's a hole doing in my TARDIS?



and "mute"

Cardiovorax
Jun 5, 2011

I mean, if you're a successful actress and you go out of the house in a skirt and without underwear, knowing that paparazzi are just waiting for opportunities like this and that it has happened many times before, then there's really nobody you can blame for it but yourself.
Like 95% of all European languages share enough phonemes that if you can understand one, you can probably semi-comprehensibly pronounce most of them. English gets every single vocal wrong.

Frostwerks
Sep 24, 2007

by Lowtax

haha

Frostwerks
Sep 24, 2007

by Lowtax

Cardiovorax posted:

Like 95% of all European languages share enough phonemes that if you can understand one, you can probably semi-comprehensibly pronounce most of them. English gets every single vocal wrong.

im writing a screenplay about your life. it's called 14 going on 40

Horniest Manticore
Nov 23, 2013

Hello, you!
Lipstick Apathy
"Phonetically" is not spelled phonetically.

Horniest Manticore
Nov 23, 2013

Hello, you!
Lipstick Apathy
Want to have your mind blown? Check this out. This is the order in which adjectives are generally arranged in English. Native speakers have memorized this order but rarely have it pointed out to them.

1. Quantity or number
2. Quality or opinion
3. Size
4. Age
5. Shape
6. Color
7. Proper adjective (often nationality, other place of origin, or material)
8. Purpose or qualifier

Example:

Those are three amazing big old thick black American loving cocks!

Cardiovorax
Jun 5, 2011

I mean, if you're a successful actress and you go out of the house in a skirt and without underwear, knowing that paparazzi are just waiting for opportunities like this and that it has happened many times before, then there's really nobody you can blame for it but yourself.

Frostwerks posted:

im writing a screenplay about your life. it's called 14 going on 40
If you're so fascinated by me, I'm sure I could find one of those old videos of mine somewhere. For "research purposes," of course. Not that I'd imply anything.

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monkey
Jan 20, 2004

by zen death robot
Yams Fan
helico-pter (spiral-wing) should have a silent p

pre-gnant (before-birth) should have a silent g

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