- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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retard strength
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Dec 17, 2014 03:48
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Apr 28, 2024 23:41
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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crossfit
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Dec 17, 2014 04:06
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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humans also used to be stronger but changed due to sedentary lifestyle
im almost certain when i was 13 i argued in GBS that a sufficiently well trained and conditioned human could defeat a gorilla in unarmed combat and it went on for like 10 pages
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Dec 17, 2014 05:12
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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If you're just talking about a 1 on 1 boxing ring type situation not "Arnie vs the Predator"/hunger games tho I'm p sure the gorilla dominates 99 times out of 100.
im not talking about strongest gorilla in the world vs strongest man, im talking about a really strong, well trained man (trained solely in the art of fighting gorillas) against an average gorilla
fake out the gorilla a few times and then pluck its eyes out and you could win imo
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Dec 18, 2014 00:46
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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if it's 1 on 1 in a cage with no weapons, no, any human would be hosed.
you're thinking a huge strike on the gorilla would bother him.
gorilla wouldn't give a poo poo, he would keep moving forward and then he would gently caress you up big style.
no it wouldnt be a huge strike. you would have to use agility and youd have to fake out and trick the gorilla and pluck out its eyeballs to get the upper hand. then youd fight dirty the only reason why itd have to be an exceptionally strong human is so he could land enough hits on a blind gorilla to finally take it down before exhaustion
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Dec 18, 2014 00:55
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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gorillas would have more agility than you on an account of having 4 pivot points, whereas a human would have two.
you're assuming that you'd get within arms length of a gorilla to blind him, by the time you were within arms length he would destroy you.
youd have to anticipate where the gorilla would strike using a human's above average intelligence. that is what i mean by studying gorilla fighting in a scientific environment. he would have to dodge the initial blows to get in a position where he can blind the gorilla
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Dec 18, 2014 01:01
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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im not the one who will fight the gorilla. it will be hundreds of men from strong families trained from birth, bred for gorilla fighting. only one dude who was bad enough would be selected to fight the gorilla
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Dec 18, 2014 01:03
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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I mean yeah if you're the world heavyweight champion or a shaolin monk or some poo poo and study gorillas for years then maybe
thats all im arguing, but its more like the world heavyweight champion who is also a shaolin monk who has studied gorilla fighting science his entire life
my only claim is that its possible
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Dec 18, 2014 01:06
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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the biggest strongest man on loving earth could not beat an average male gorilla who was face to face with him if he was trained in every martial art on loving earth a trillion times out of a trillion. stop this is awkward.
i disagree, i think thats a ridiculous statement. gorillas arent magic and they are also dumber than us. an average gorilla wouldnt expect the bred-from-birth-to-fight-gorillas human (who is 450lbs, 50lbs heavier than the gorilla, and taller) to kick dust in its face then feint and pluck its eyeballs out
also while a gorilla will start panicking and making poor decisions, the man would get increasingly focused and defeat the gorilla methodically
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Dec 18, 2014 01:53
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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a panicked gorilla is like the last thing i'd want to fight
not if you are a shaolin heavyweight champion. thats when the fight becomes easier once youve entered whats known as the "combat zen zone"
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Dec 18, 2014 01:54
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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there's more to being a gorilla than just being bigger and uh heavier, i don't know if a human is even capable of punching hard enough to hurt a gorilla
you all are dumb rear end mothers, forreal
what do you know about being a gorilla
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Dec 18, 2014 02:02
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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if you're picking the biggest strongest man to fight the gorilla its only fair you take a gorilla trained from birth to kill men and it has to be the biggest most ripped as gently caress gorilla too good luck god bless
no its not supposed to be a fair fight. this is the pinnacle of humanity in genetics and training, against an average gorilla. those are the stakes of the argument
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Dec 18, 2014 02:08
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Apr 28, 2024 23:41
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- TEAYCHES
- Jun 23, 2002
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Guys, listen to the expert.
Gorilla vs. Man
'Any animal can be knocked out by a hard punch'
******************************
by Gene Tunney
1926-28 Heavyweight Boxing Champion
Editor and Owner
Connecticut Nutmeg
New Canaan, Conn.
Vol. 1, No. 3
June 9, 1938
It was one of the first fights I had ever had. It was in France during the war. I was to box a big sergeant who outweighed me considerably and who had much more experience. Just before the gong sounded a second in my corner said, 'Stay away from this fellow. Be careful, he's as strong as a gorilla.'
In the second round I hit him in the solar plexus with a left hook and he very obligingly went down and out. It was not a particularly hard punch. I went back to my corner and said, 'If gorillas aren't any stronger than that get a match for me with one.'
I was a great admirer of the late Arthur Brisbane. I admired him tremendously as a man, as an editor, and of course greatly as a reporter. It was he who on the eve of an important championship heavyweight fight once wrote a bit contemptuously, 'A gorilla could lick them both.' The line was widely quoted and Brisbane often used it. More than once he wrote editorials for the Sunday American on the theme and the editorials were accompanied by Windsor McKay drawings showing an enormous gorilla crushing a man with a casual sweep of his right arm.
Eventually fighting became my trade. I was interested in every phase of boxing and of human anatomy. I learned early that a boxer to be successful must know a great deal more than how to land a punch. He must know where to land it so that it will have the most effect. He must know his own body and he must strengthen parts of his body which were never meant to absorb punches -- the solar plexus region for instance. Out of sheer curiosity I often talked over Brisbane's statement with medical men who knew anatomy and with explorers and wild animal men who knew gorillas.
I happened to be seated alongside of him at the 1932 Democratic convention in Chicago. One day Frank Buck walked up to us and I said to Frank, 'You know something about gorillas. Do you think that a well-trained, well-conditioned prize-fighter could knock out a gorilla?' This was meant as a sort of kid, for I knew that Mr. Brisbane, in spite of his great intellectual capacity, had no understanding of humor.
Buck said, 'I certainly do. I don't think he'd have any trouble.'
'How about it, Mr. Brisbane?' I asked, but Mr. Brisbane only shook his head. He said, rather emphatically, after Frank Buck departed, 'Tunney, don't let that fellow fool you, a gorilla could lick three men.' He wasn't going to give up a conviction which he had held for many years. Mr. Brisbane went to his death convinced that a gorilla could lick any man who ever lived.
I asked the late Martin Johnson about it and he thoroughly agreed with Buck and myself.
'A gorilla is a sluggish thinker,' Martin Johnson said. 'He only knows one attack. He goes after something and grabs it with his hands and then hugs it to his breast, crushing the life out of it when possible.'
* * *
It is my firm conviction that any fairly good heavyweight boxer could put the great Gargantua to sleep or to rout within two minutes. You must remember that a boxer stepping into the ring to defend or seek a championship is, muscularly speaking, quite a different person than is the spectator who watches him. Years of specialized calisthenics have put a tough layer of hard muscle over the boxer's stomach and solar plexus. Punches that would knock the ordinary man out instantly or injure him internally, bounce off the hardened body of a well conditioned boxer without making him gasp. That protective layer of muscle absorbs punches just as shock absorbers on your car assimilate the bumps.
And speaking of unprotected solar plexuses, I can remember seeing in the American Vaudeville Theatre at 42nd Street and Eighth Avenue some years ago a washed-up middleweight fighter named Mike Farrell from the Westside Athletic Club put the gloves on with a trained polar bear at the invitation of the trainer from the stage. The bear had been used to sticking out one of its gloved fore-paws and scaring the silly men who would accept the invitation to box with the bear as a lark. Mike Farrell had an Irish sense of humor. When the bear stuck out his paw, Mike simply slipped inside and with both hands played the most resounding rat-a-tat on the unsuspecting bear's midsection. The bear dropped on all fours and ran off the stage, letting out the most terrifying shrieks. The trainer tried to brain Mike with a chair, the only weapon he could reach, for trying to kill his breadwinner.
Gargantua is a big boy but a Dempsey left hook landing on his stomach might figuratively tear the poor animal in two and leave him paralyzed on the canvas or jungle. He didn't spend years of doing bending and mat exercises. A man has twenty-four ribs. Your encyclopedia will tell you that a gorilla has but thirteen. Between the ribs, below the breastbone, there are nerve centers. If they are shocked the shock travels to the spine temporarily causing paralysis. The ribs and well developed muscles between the ribs protect these nerve centers. Twenty-four ribs are much more protection than thirteen.
There is the question of Gargantua's enormous teeth which look so frightening. He could do a lot of damage with his teeth and he doesn't know it. To begin with he lives on a vegetable diet. He isn't a meat eater. He is herbivorous and therefore would hardly relish a bite of tough human muscle. Anyone who lives only on what the dietitians call soft food must have weak teeth. They haven't been hardened to tearing meat. A good right-hand punch would probably send eight of Gargantua's teeth flying out to the seventh row.
A gorilla has a skull which closely resembles the skull of a man. However, encased in that skull is a small brain, smaller than that of a dog. A gorilla has no reasoning process worthy of the name. Suppose he was fighting Joe Louis. What would he make of that amazing fast left jab? It would bewilder him considerably. It has bewildered every human opponent (except Max Schmeling) Louis has ever fought. A gorilla doesn't know pain, they say. Suppose Louis or Schmeling or any of the first ten ranking heavyweights were to land a punch let's say on Gargantua's Adam's Apple. Then Gargantua would know pain. Were you ever hit on the Adam's Apple? It isn't fun. Jack Dempsey hit me there when we boxed in Philadelphia and I felt as though I were swallowing whole pineapples for a week after. Martin Johnson told me a well-placed punch on the jaw would down the average large gorilla.
As soon as Gargantua felt pain his reaction would be to rush in furiously. A good fighter would side step, swing a right to the jaw and Gargantua would be hearing the birdies sing. Any animal who has a brain, a nervous system and a spinal cord, can be knocked out.
Now the Ringling Brothers Circus has come to our part of the country. It has pitched its tents at Bridgeport. Gargantua, the great star of the show, is there. Humphrey Doulens, one of our contributors, and a most ardent devotee of the circus, will also be there. He offers to arrange an opportunity for me to test out my theory: That a well-conditioned fighter could lick any gorilla. But unfortunately I am no longer in fighting shape. However, I would like to take up the offer for any one of a dozen third-rate heavyweights I know, but I would have to insist on immunity from any legal action by Ringling Brothers-Barnum and Bailey for damages through injury to Gargantua the Great. Moreover, I would insist on a referee other than Humphrey Doulens or any other Bridgeport buddy of Gargantua's to prevent the possibility of a long count.
- The End -
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Dec 17, 2014 03:48
