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Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
As an Atheist, I pray every day for the death of all religions and the dawn of enlightenment.

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Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Hector Beerlioz posted:

I bet atleast one of them complained about not getting enough cheese.

Maybe he was praying to Cheesus Christ?

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Muerte posted:

What does praying do? Nothing that's what, go take your attention seeking bullshit to your church and pray for your meals there. I don't want my children introduced to your weird and creepy bullshit.

E; I don't have kids but you know

I pass a crystal three or four times over my meals before eating so I can maximize my magnetism intake.

I also only eat at restaurants built on top of ley lines if I can.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Jerry Mumphrey posted:

Hi, welcome to heaven. Ok let's get right to this.

Baptised...check. You gave thousands of dollars to local charities, good, good. Oh! Says here you went on a humanitarian mission to nurse Ebola patients, that's great!


Oops...hold on. Ooh, seems you didn't pray before you ate that fast food burrito that one time?

Hmm yeah my hands are tied here. It's off to hell with you.

lol at this guy who doesn't understand how prayer works.

You pray over food to ask for protection from food poisoning. You pray in church to get into heaven.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Cnut the Great posted:

prayer is about quiet reflection and being thankful for all that u have. it isn't about wishing for stuff or trying to get into heaven. why don't you try talking to a real religious person once in a while

If it's about quiet reflection then why do they say it out loud? Checkmate, Christians.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

Cnut the Great posted:

so taht others may know and be inspired by god's boundless glory

If God's glory is so boundless, why does he need some douchey loser to rep for him?

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost
lol gently caress people who believe in a higher power, amirite?

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

exquisite tea posted:

I ate a whole bunch of eggs and yogurt before an important meeting at work today and now I'm praying that my bowels hold up for another two hours.

Are you posting this from the meeting?

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

happyhippy posted:

A higher power that cares about what loving salad dressing they will use, yup.

God cares about everything. He is infinite, which means He has an infinite amount of time to devote to each and every one of us.

Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

exquisite tea posted:

We're about to get started and my gut is already at a low rumble, it's gonna take a miracle to keep this in until 3.

It was six minutes between my post and your reply. Why didn't you just go during the interval?

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Applewhite
Aug 16, 2014

by vyelkin
Nap Ghost

icantfindaname posted:

what about thin girls with big tits?

Actually the correct answer is medium-sized girls with REALLY big tits and big butts also.

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