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Choke someone, put them in a pool to make it appear like they drowned, and smash their watch after setting it to a time that will give you an alibi
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Feb 26, 2015 13:08
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banana peel, flight of stairs, the gentlest of nudges
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Feb 26, 2015 13:09
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Kill your spouse after infidelity and months of loud, violent arguuments that wake the neighbors. Claim a black guy broke in or whatever.
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Feb 26, 2015 13:11
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Honour kill your high school sweetheart then forget your alibi. Years later become a podcast series superstar.
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Feb 26, 2015 13:19
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For real though #freeAdnan
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Feb 26, 2015 13:20
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Use a knife to stab someone then use jet fuel to melt the blade.
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Feb 26, 2015 13:22
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shoot the president in the head with a tshirt cannon
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Feb 26, 2015 13:22
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Professor Shark posted:Choke someone, put them in a pool to make it appear like they drowned, and smash their watch after setting it to a time that will give you an alibi Due to its position, the hyoid bone is not susceptible to easy fracture. In a suspected case of murder, a fractured hyoid strongly indicates throttling or strangulation in an adult. Body temperature, while falling slower than normal when in cold conditions such as in water or outside, will still likely not present a time frame that matches the watch. Not_Rainbow_Horse posted:shoot the president in the head with a tshirt cannon I got Lowtax another visit from the Secret Service and all I got was this stupid t-shirt.
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Feb 26, 2015 13:28
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Large, pointy icicle up the pooper and a simple note that says "I'm gay". No evidence and police will just suspect a bbc and no foul play.
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Feb 26, 2015 13:30
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Tie someone up and place a bundle of TNT in front of them with a ten second fuse.
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Feb 26, 2015 13:30
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post detailed plan on social media
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Feb 26, 2015 13:31
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haunted bong posted:post detailed plan on social media murder anyone who doesn't like & share
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Feb 26, 2015 13:36
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Confront ex-wife and new boyfriend outside her home. Stab both repeatedly. Bring along gloves and get blood on them, but make sure that the gloves are just a little too small and won't fit your hands.
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Feb 26, 2015 13:48
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Kill them in the night and say you were sleep walking
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Feb 26, 2015 13:49
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bury them alive -- in a ballpit
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Feb 26, 2015 14:14
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moose face posted:Kill them in the night and say you were sleep walking Actually a pretty decent plan. Shoot them with a gun registered to you, and then hide it under your mattress.
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Feb 26, 2015 14:24
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Mr. Popo posted:Due to its position, the hyoid bone is not susceptible to easy fracture. In a suspected case of murder, a fractured hyoid strongly indicates throttling or strangulation in an adult. What if it's a digital watch 
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Feb 26, 2015 14:28
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Stab them through a really tight belt. Have an alibi for when they take it off and bleed to death. Give a knife and money to someone else, make them pinky swear to not tell anyone. Trick them into writing something that could be construed as a suicide note, then kill them.
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Feb 26, 2015 15:11
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Choke somone to death while on camera in front of multiple eyewitnesses. (This doubles as The Best Murder if you're a cop and they're a black.)
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Feb 26, 2015 15:21
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Plant a time bomb in someones house and set it for a year somebody actually did this and might have gotten away with it except that he was nuts and literally went to the police to say he wasn't involved when the police didn't even know who he was at the time
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Feb 26, 2015 15:23
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strangle someone outside the big window on the today show
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Feb 26, 2015 15:27
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Explain your grandiose plan in explicit and very incriminating detail, laughing at the futile attempts by the police to catch you up until now. Watch the highway cop put away his citation book, radio in for back up, then put his hand on his holster and ask you to step out of the car now. Speeding ticket, really?
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Feb 26, 2015 15:35
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teach your daughter how to drive
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Feb 26, 2015 15:48
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Walk up to someone giving a speech on a stage in front of thousands of people and on live TV, blow their head off with both barrels, raise your hands in victory and yell "WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I DID IT!!! I KILLED THAT GUY!!!!!" There may be a few kinks in my plan but I'm sure they'll work themselves out.
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Feb 26, 2015 16:01
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Shoot a guy with a derringer in a theater in 1865 during a lovely play.
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Feb 26, 2015 16:06
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Teleport inside a womb and eat Hitler's fetus.
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Feb 26, 2015 16:08
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Feb 26, 2015 16:10
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Dastardly!
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Feb 26, 2015 16:13
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a hose that goes from their butt to their mouth and then they choke on the fart gas while they sleep and then they die and it looks like it was because their farts backed up kakadodopoopisstittytoot
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Feb 26, 2015 16:17
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go up to someone eating in a restaurant and start cramming food into their mouth when no ones looking at you two it'll look like they died naturally
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Feb 26, 2015 16:23
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Digital Fingers posted:
this in one of the 59 inuit words for snow, fyi
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Feb 26, 2015 16:24
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Ill Peripheral posted:For real though #freeAdnan hes guilty tbh
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Feb 26, 2015 16:24
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Suck their dicks off
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Feb 26, 2015 16:31
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Kajeesus posted:Stab them through a really tight belt. Have an alibi for when they take it off and bleed to death. That was the dumbest Sherlock episode so it fits right in here. Don't care how tight a belt is you'd feel someone loving stabbing you. I'd volunteer to prove this but I'm 500lbs so belts don't fit me.
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Feb 26, 2015 16:56
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really really hot sauce
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Feb 26, 2015 17:02
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remove passenger seat and place her in car then get ready to write code for reiser4
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Feb 26, 2015 17:05
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become prince of a secret ninja commune then have your parents transofmmred into monsters by a mad scientist then murder them with your friends then fight a guy who loosk like a satan
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Feb 26, 2015 17:05
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Throw someone in lava and they'd melt right? No evidence. perfect crime.
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Feb 26, 2015 17:09
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Google "How long can a baby live in a closed car during summer." Then leave a baby in your car during a hot day and claim you forgot about the small human. Make sure to practice your remorseful hollers for bystanders when you return to the vehicle.
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Feb 26, 2015 17:31
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ChogsEnhour posted:That was the dumbest Sherlock episode so it fits right in here. Don't care how tight a belt is you'd feel someone loving stabbing you. I'd volunteer to prove this but I'm 500lbs so belts don't fit me. Wait that was seriously an episode of television?
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Feb 26, 2015 17:33
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