PYF Trolls From Game Developers

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Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Anything in free to play games where it;s clearly been designed to be less fun so you'll buy coins or gems to skip it.

# ¿ Mar 8, 2015 02:03

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 02:53

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

The Deus Ex games are all about exploration. You start the first mission at your base and you basally just have to go talk to your boss and get your assignment. The place is full of computers to hack, people to talk to, and things to find. The game gives you a few reminders that you should be in a hurry but certainly encourages you to look around. If you take too much time, you'll arrive t the mission site to find a bunch of cops chewing you out because you took to long and all the hostages are dead.

# ¿ Mar 17, 2015 02:00

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Didn't one of the Final Fantasy games have super powerful weapons that only appeared if you didn't open certain chests at earlier points in the game?

# ¿ Mar 18, 2015 18:58

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

I think 7th guest had a puzzle where you play against an AI. Faster computers allowed it to make better moves and it's basically impossible to beat on a modern computer.

# ¿ Mar 20, 2015 05:06

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

I don't really know the context but there's that video of Snake hanging out at the beach with some guy and it's extremely gay. I can only assume it was made to make fans of the series uncomfortable.

# ¿ Mar 21, 2015 21:34

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Everyone is talking aobut Hitchhkier's Guide and ignoring Bureaucracy which seems to be an extremely deliberate troll.

quote:

The player is challenged to confront a long and complicated series of bureaucratic hurdles resulting from a recent change of address. Mail isn't being delivered, bank accounts are inaccessible, and nothing is as it should be. The game includes a measure of simulated blood pressure which rises when "frustrating" events happen and lowers after a period of no annoying events. Once a certain blood pressure level is reached, the player suffers an aneurysm and the game ends.

While undertaking the seemingly simple task of retrieving misdirected mail, the player encounters a number of bizarre characters, including an antisocial hacker, a paranoid weapons enthusiast, and a tribe of Zalagasan cannibals. At the same time, they must deal with impersonal corporations, counterintuitive airport logic, and a hungry llama.

# ¿ Mar 24, 2015 05:07

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJshjMyg6no

# ¿ Mar 25, 2015 06:11

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

NotAnArtist posted:

My least favorite troll is Del Toro and Kojima canceling Silent Hills

Is this a real game? It sounds like something my mother would say while complaining about pokemans.

# ¿ Apr 27, 2015 20:56

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

It's everywhere over there. I've even seen arcade versions of it.

# ¿ Apr 29, 2015 00:39

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Sometimes early access is dirt cheap which makes sense. You're taking a gamble and basically working as a beta tester so you get a discount. I don't really get the early access games that want you to pay full price for half a game that might never come out.

# ¿ May 1, 2015 19:22

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

In my junior high if people got suspicious, you'd have to show your end screen that missing no messed up. No one would play against someone who cloned rare candies.

# ¿ May 2, 2015 06:24

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Did the later pokemon games have better AI? One of the main reasons the first one was so easy was that every enemy would growl at you 5 times in a row while you killed them.

# ¿ May 5, 2015 04:37

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

peter gabriel posted:

The tutorial in the original Driver

Holy poo poo forgot about that. How many people rented that game and never managed to actually play it?

# ¿ May 5, 2015 13:18

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

How about the death of shadow in FF6? They tell you to hurry hurry hurry off the island and put a ticking clock in the car be. But do it too fast and the most badass character dies.

# ¿ May 6, 2015 01:15

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Nothing special. Just the usual case of early access game makes a bunch of promises, then runs off with the money.

# ¿ May 6, 2015 04:59

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Alouicious posted:

oh they totally did because they ran out of money for its development, but the insane bitter nerdrage about it is way funnier and sadder

Really not getting this one. Nerd rage is people getting mad about stupid poo poo. being unhappy about a poor purchase is completely reasonable.

# ¿ May 6, 2015 15:17

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

I'm just laughing at the idea of an awesome sword called Excalibur 2. Real creative name guys.

# ¿ May 9, 2015 18:54

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Sleeveless posted:

Tell that to all the boot-lickers who keep defending ads and pay-to-win bullshit in mobile games with the exhortation that you don't have to spend any money if you don't want to, up to and including the point where every mobile game is a glorified slot machine based more on giving people just the right amount of feedback to make them spend money so they can keep watching bars fill up and tapping on them.

I've made the choice to not play any games with in app purchases, no matter how much people say it's fine and you don't really have to buy anything. It's so much better. Pay the $.99 up front and get a real game.

# ¿ May 10, 2015 13:35

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Speaking of false credits. I got totally tricked by the fake credits in Donkey Kong Country. Put down my controller only to have K. Rool hop back up and kill me.

# ¿ May 20, 2015 00:56

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

I've been playing through the Deponia games. They're fun point and click adventures with pretty good puzzles. but one in the 2nd game was a real trial.

You have to get in through a door but you can't because you need to know the secret knock. You do a bunch of stuff to learn it and return to the door. It won't work because you have to pass through a market place with catchy music playing, that makes you lose the rhythm of the knock.

I spent hours trying to find a way to the door without going through the market, plugging my ears, stopping the music, knocking from another location, or remembering the secret knock better. Turns out all you have to do is go into the options menu and mute the background music.

# ¿ Nov 6, 2015 20:56

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

The old stats system was weird like that since doing anything at all increased base stats. You could have a monster show up and tear apart your most skilled fighters, only to have its head ripped off by some guy who's just been swinging a pick since the start of the fort.

The logical answer is to take some of these super strong miners and engravers and draft them to the military. The problem is that during training they had a good chance of straight up killing other recruits. A low weapon skill lead to training injuries being more common and their high stats made the injuries more severe.

If anyone thinks it sounds like a cool game they should just give it a try. It's confusing but there's a lot of good wikis and the dwarf fortress thread is really helpful. I haven't actually played since they the patch that made it really confusing to make your military actually pick up weapons and armour. What's it like now?

# ¿ Nov 29, 2015 17:42

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Internet Kraken posted:

Syndromes are randomly generated diseases. Maybe you fight a forgotten beast and touching its blood makes your dwarves develop a nasty cough. Or it could breathe clouds of toxic miasma that cause them to bleed from every part of their body in about 3 seconds. You just never know what kind of fun you're gonna get with syndromes! One time I ran into a syndrome that turned an exposed dwarf into a ghoulish zombie creature that was constantly rotting. However, they weren't hostile, so they didn't try to kill any dwarves. The other dwarves didn't want them around though so anytime they saw them they would either run away or try to murder them. So imagine a fortress with about half a dozen zombie hobos living on the outskirts, endlessly spewing miasma from their eternally rotting bodies. Occasionally one would run through the fort and scare the poo poo out of everyone and lead the military on a wild goose chase across the map.

I read about a guy who had a monster attack his fort. When it died it left a mysterious powder on the ground that his dwarves tracked everywhere. It didn't seem to be hurting anything so he didn't worry about it. Three years later half his dwarves suddenly have their feet fall off. Turns out the monster blood was some sort of super slow poison that only affected body parts it directly touched.

# ¿ Nov 30, 2015 05:45

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

haveblue posted:

Zybourne Clock is still the best thing this forum has or will ever produce.

You're using a real loose definition of "produced."

# ¿ Dec 15, 2015 20:35

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

The main things I remember about crimson haze is the guy getting really mad at all the fart jokes being made in the thread, and that people were actually pretty impressed that he managed to make anything at all outside of a website and some concept art.

# ¿ Dec 16, 2015 05:12

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Somfin posted:

gently caress, why do these games have to pad out their plots with all this bullshit gameplay that does nothing but waste my time? Why do these games have to pad out their gameplay with all this bullshit plot that does nothing but waste my time? Why are there failure states that do nothing but waste my time? Why are there enemies that obstruct my progress and waste my time? Why is there any distance at all between quest giver and quest site, all that travel just wastes my time! Why does this boss have more than one hit point, all it does is waste my time! Why are there more than one level, I got to an ending, why do I have to do it again and waste even more of my precious time!?

All games should come with a 'win game' button that is pre-pressed on starting up so that it jumps straight from steam icon to end credits so as to minimise time wasting. Just dump all 100% of the available achievements right onto my steam profile on load and call it good. I paid my five dollars (thanks steam sale!), I don't want to have to waste my time playing this time-wasting piece of poo poo.

Seriously, though. That part of the game doesn't have very engaging gameplay, that's valid. That part of the game isn't varied or interesting enough to hold my attention, that's valid. That part of the game feels like a pointless diversion from the main plot and it takes too much work for it to resolve, that's valid. It wastes your time? Motherfucker you are playing the blip bloops on the fuckin' screen, that time is gone. Every game is built to eat up big fat greasy slabs of your time, whether or not that time is wasted is up to you. We're living in an era where 50+ hours of "content" is a selling point. Why keep playing if you are being forced to spend that time doing something you don't like?

E: Seriously, I need to know this. Why did you keep playing if that early section was such a loving chore? What was it about the game that made continuing through that section worth it?

Do you seriously not understand why people enjoy playing a game but not enjoy watching a little man running in a treadmill?

# ¿ Dec 16, 2015 13:08

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

princecoo posted:

I remember a mod for the original Operation Flashpoint (the grandaddy of the ARMA games), it was a total conversion and actually really good, it added a poo poo-tonne of new weapons, uniforms, vehicles and a whole singleplayer campaign. I think it was based around the Finnish Army?

Anyway, about halfway through the campaign, there is a mission where you're supposed to stand guard on a hill in a little makeshift bunker/tent and remain on watch at the edge of your FOB, from like 12am until dawn, at which point you get relieved by next shift.

This is exactly what happens.

There are a couple of points where a civilian vehicle will drive along the road down the hill and in/around the nearby town, and at one point 2 civvies park near a house, get out and go inside for a couple of hours, then leave, but that's it.

It's literally a mission that simulates what standing post is actually like. The game can be sped up (up to 4x real time, I think?) but even then it's still a real time hour of boredom.

It's brilliant because this is a FPS army game, you're expecting things to kick off at any moment, but they just... don't.

In the very first Alien vs Predator game, the first human mission had no enemies. You just walked through a a bunch of creepy hallways filled with hissing steam vents, clanging machines and other startling things. Then like 30 minutes in you start getting rushed by aliens.

# ¿ Jan 15, 2016 06:59

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Veotax posted:

I think you could find the Fallout 2 guide in Fallout 2 in the weird post-game section after you finish the main quest. Reading it says something like "This would have been useful earlier" and bumps all your SPECIAL stats up to 10.

In the earlier Ultima games, there was a talking horse (I think) who gave you hints to the hardest puzzles in previous games, but nothing useful abut the game you are actually playing.

# ¿ Jan 20, 2016 06:11

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

It would be a minor thing until they fixed it. Then every brony and MRA would be complaining.

When that XCOM remake came out, there were people complaining that male and female soldiers had the same stats.

# ¿ Jan 20, 2016 23:58

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 02:53

Dr_Amazing: Apr 15, 2006; It's a long story

Section Z posted:

I know it's not exactly a "Horror" game except for the fact you flee in terror from a muscle man with no pants as he casually walks through explosives that would instant kill you.

But "Breakdown" on original Xbox had some serious First Person View going. Doing spinning high kicks, backflips and side rolls? Guess what happens to your camera!

So I'm sure that it would cause a lot of people to puke just as much as the first person barfing scene.

Does anybody know offhand how many "first person melee" games have your camera anchored to your face to that degree?

Frycry 3 does it a fair bit as well.

# ¿ Mar 27, 2016 19:02

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