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I had this really good idea of how to make money off of crime without risk. Everyone knows that crows and other corvids are attracted to shiny objects. And on top of that, there are stories of crows bringing "gifts" to people who feed them. Crows are very good at item recognition, so it seems likely enough that they could be trained to look for specific items, and bring them back to their trainers. Imagine this: a large plaza in a tourist location, with happy, unaware tourists happily eating outside, taking pictures of the scenery and talking loudly. One of them takes out his credit card or several bills, getting ready to pay. The moment he turns away, a crow quickly and stealthily swoops down, taking the card in its beak, and returning it to home base. Even if the person did get caught, they could just pretend to be an eccentric, and say that sometimes the birds brought back money. Am I criminal mastermind, or what?
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Apr 10, 2015 21:39
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Apr 10, 2015 21:41
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Earthbound has you beat to that idea by like, 20 years
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Apr 10, 2015 21:42
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for those of us on the coast, seagulls work well too
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Apr 10, 2015 21:44
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whoflungpoop posted:for those of us on the coast, seagulls work well too Seagulls are good at stealing, but the aren't smart enough to train. Like, they can steal food, but I don't think you can explain to a seagull how to steal credit cards or money.
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Apr 10, 2015 21:48
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glowing-fish posted:Seagulls are good at stealing, but the aren't smart enough to train. Like, they can steal food, but I don't think you can explain to a seagull how to steal credit cards or money. Next set of earthians to use for the evil commodity market: found.
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Apr 10, 2015 21:48
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nice, so you want to enslave intelligent creatures for crimes
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Apr 10, 2015 21:50
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Apr 10, 2015 21:53
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bettter idea: teach crows to feed our pets 
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Apr 10, 2015 21:53
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Wait till the crows learn they can just buy food with all the money they've stolen and cut you out of the equation
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Apr 10, 2015 21:56
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Stick Figure Mafia posted:bettter idea: Maybe I should have just called this thread "post corvid or other bird gifs" That is also cool, people can also do that.
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Apr 10, 2015 21:56
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perhaps one day a crow could even be trained to care for children and the elderly.
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Apr 10, 2015 21:57
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Corvids are fascinating using tools and poo poo. the moral thing to do would be to let ourselves die out so they can evolve and try again with this whole civilization thing. them and the squids
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Apr 10, 2015 21:58
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Fergus Mac Roich posted:nice, so you want to enslave intelligent creatures for crimes Just call me.. Mister Brooklyn Capitalist.
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Apr 10, 2015 22:00
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glowing-fish posted:Maybe I should have just called this thread "post corvid or other bird gifs" thats a dog
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Apr 10, 2015 22:00
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irl i am actually a crow pretending to be a person pretending to be a dog w ith sunglasses on the something awful forums
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Apr 10, 2015 22:00
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I don't know, wasting their awesome undead buttkicking emo powers on pick pocketing... seems to be kinda quaint.
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Apr 10, 2015 22:02
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Stick Figure Mafia posted:bettter idea: awwww 
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Apr 10, 2015 22:02
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Otto von Ruthless posted:Corvids are fascinating gently caress that if they wanna get civilized they got beat us first
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Apr 10, 2015 22:04
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Stick Figure Mafia posted:bettter idea: look at all those aminals get along (:
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Apr 10, 2015 22:04
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Necros posted:irl i am actually a crow pretending to be a person pretending to be a dog w ith sunglasses on the something awful forums not true, you're actually several children in a trench coat
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Apr 10, 2015 22:05
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=siTCJKbxjiM Crows: the Best Bird?
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Apr 10, 2015 22:05
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glowing-fish posted:Maybe I should have just called this thread "post corvid or other bird gifs" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aMBhYn66uzk
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Apr 10, 2015 22:07
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Fergus Mac Roich posted:not true, you're actually several children in a trench coat while you were typing this post i stole all of your lugnuts
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Apr 10, 2015 22:22
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Crows have a lot of potential as wise-cracking, street-smart sidekicks, paired opposite the experienced by the numbers detective in buddy cop movies.
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Apr 10, 2015 22:25
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Personally I've taken to zip-tying guns to crows' feet and then watching as they rain bullets down on the city.
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Apr 10, 2015 22:26
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Dead Gay Romans posted:Crows have a lot of potential as wise-cracking, street-smart sidekicks, paired opposite the experienced by the numbers detective in buddy cop movies. Would this be a real trained crow, or a CGI crow voiced by John Travolta?
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Apr 10, 2015 22:30
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Nooner posted:look at all those aminals get along (: ever wonder how many animals die each day lol
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Apr 10, 2015 22:31
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Rather train those lil monkeys
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Apr 10, 2015 22:31
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glowing-fish posted:Maybe I should have just called this thread "post corvid or other bird gifs" How 'bout a video of a crow sledding. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dWw9GLcOeA
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Apr 10, 2015 23:15
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glowing-fish posted:Would this be a real trained crow, or a CGI crow voiced by John Travolta? A real trained crow with Travolta's voice dubbed in.
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Apr 10, 2015 23:20
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Bored posted:How 'bout a video of a crow sledding. That is pretty awesome! Proclick! I know that other animals have tool usage, but it seems that corvids might be the only animals who use tools for fun.
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Apr 10, 2015 23:20
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Crow Vending Machine https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bXQAgzfwuNQ 7:15
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Apr 10, 2015 23:22
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glowing-fish posted:That is pretty awesome! Proclick! if a dolphin could i bet it would put things in its butt
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Apr 10, 2015 23:23
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Crows loving ownhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zK10aJcOfF0
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Apr 10, 2015 23:23
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Can I get a pet crow or would that make me a goth
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Apr 10, 2015 23:25
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I used to have a bunch of crows and bluejays that would bitch at me every morning until I fed the outdoor cats. Apparently they don't like the food I feed the cats as much now. Although I switched shortly to one brand because my usual brand kept loving up the recipe or something ( the cats didn't recognize it as food), and I swear one of the bluejays was about to knife fight the grackles for it. It was pretty funny to watch. This year, the crows were running interference between a red-shouldered hawk and the squirrels. I'm guessing so that they could dig up all of the squirrels food once the squirrels were done.
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Apr 10, 2015 23:35
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forget pickpocketing, in an area with a lot of outdoor businesses in the summer they could be stealing cash and cards all over the place off of tables and bars and whatnot you could make a machine like in that tedtalk where whenever the crow puts in money he gets peanuts and theyd train themselves
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Apr 10, 2015 23:38
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gggiiimmmppp posted:forget pickpocketing, in an area with a lot of outdoor businesses in the summer they could be stealing cash and cards all over the place off of tables and bars and whatnot They'd have to learn how to work in tandem to smooth out the bills.
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Apr 10, 2015 23:43
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gggiiimmmppp posted:forget pickpocketing, in an area with a lot of outdoor businesses in the summer they could be stealing cash and cards all over the place off of tables and bars and whatnot Thanks for reading my OP.
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Apr 11, 2015 02:40
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