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I'll leave the pussy puns up to you:quote:NAPLES, FL - So far, this cat Dexter/Osama bin Laden has gotten one of my parents' neighbor's kitties, my best friend's mom's cat, and my dad's buddy's cat. He's using an axe or machete to chop them in half, according to local rumor, then he puts one half of cat on one end of the street and dumps the other half down the road. I'm hoping there may be a few Pet Detectives on the goon forums that can help me catch the fucker. The Sherrif's office doesn't have any leads- I have a feeling some outside help can break this case wide open. And if it's one of you (likely): Please stop your cat jihad and turn yourself in. There's a war on terror going on, and we are gonna smoke you out. Let's Roll.
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May 18, 2015 18:52
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 01:49 |
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semper fi
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May 18, 2015 18:53
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this is mad hosed up
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May 18, 2015 18:53
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Split that pussy in half, bro
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May 18, 2015 18:54
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Pretty hosed up really.
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May 18, 2015 18:54
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don't allow your cats outdoors
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May 18, 2015 18:54
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outside cats are pests and should be culled just like deer, raccoons, coyotes, etc. letting your cat outside is irresponsible and you deserve to have your cat cut in half.
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May 18, 2015 18:54
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someone's a dog lover!
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May 18, 2015 18:54
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huh, that's actually pretty hosed up
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May 18, 2015 18:55
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i hope this person gets caught by someone who has the good sense to say "what's the matter? cat got your tongue?"
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May 18, 2015 18:55
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I bet it's a katana. and yeah chopping cats is not a sign of a guy who you want in your neighborhood. Keep your cats inside yo
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May 18, 2015 18:56
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Cubey posted:don't allow your cats outdoors
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May 18, 2015 18:56
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interesting new meme
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May 18, 2015 18:56
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just tie a shield to your cat so it can deflect the first flurry of blows before escaping
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May 18, 2015 18:58
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I watch enough criminal minds to know the killer is the OP. He's a goon so he most likely has a katana. He is inserting himself into the investigation, and he is in the proximity. solved.
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May 18, 2015 18:58
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letting your cats outside can be appropriate given the right conditions and especially bc cats have a slew of important instinctual behaviors outdoor activity lets them exhibit. its not the cats' or the owners' fault that some maniac is chopping them in half. its okay to make the inside-cat argument when, say, a cat without a bell kills a songbird u liked...not when someone used an axe to spread their severed parts across the street
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May 18, 2015 18:58
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dont let your cat outside dummies
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May 18, 2015 19:00
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Cyber Dog posted:letting your cats outside can be appropriate given the right conditions and especially bc cats have a slew of important instinctual behaviors outdoor activity lets them exhibit. its not the cats' or the owners' fault that some maniac is chopping them in half. its okay to make the inside-cat argument when, say, a cat without a bell kills a songbird u liked...not when someone used an axe to spread their severed parts across the street gfy
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May 18, 2015 19:00
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May 18, 2015 19:00
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VendaGoat posted:Split that pussy in half, bro
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May 18, 2015 19:00
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cats r fuckrs
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May 18, 2015 19:00
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dethkon posted:"They only found half of the cat, so we're still looking for the other half of the cat," Do they think if they fund the other half and put the halves together the cat will get better?
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May 18, 2015 19:00
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oh?
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May 18, 2015 19:01
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gently caress da Mods posted:cats r fuckrs Actually cats are good. boom boom boom posted:Do they think if they fund the other half and put the halves together the cat will get better? Well it's probably got at least one of those nine lives left.
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May 18, 2015 19:01
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I would love to find this person.
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May 18, 2015 19:01
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give this man a medal
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May 18, 2015 19:01
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you should walk around the neighborhood with a gun
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May 18, 2015 19:01
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and shoot a black person with it ahahaha
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May 18, 2015 19:02
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this righteous individual is just trying to save the songbirds
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May 18, 2015 19:02
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Darkman Fanpage posted:and shoot a black person with it ahahaha good youtube prank vid here
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May 18, 2015 19:04
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loving florida has enough stray cats wandering around keep your cat indoors
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May 18, 2015 19:04
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Darkman Fanpage posted:and shoot a black cat with it ahahaha YOU MONSTER!
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May 18, 2015 19:04
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Cyber Dog posted:letting your cats outside can be appropriate given the right conditions and especially bc cats have a slew of important instinctual behaviors outdoor activity lets them exhibit. its not the cats' or the owners' fault that some maniac is chopping them in half. its okay to make the inside-cat argument when, say, a cat without a bell kills a songbird u liked...not when someone used an axe to spread their severed parts across the street there are other reasons besides harm to wildlife to not let cats outdoors. also i'm not at all excusing this fuckhead for being a piece of human filth and hope he is caught and prosecuted. i'd hope that if he was doing this to any other animal as well. but still don't let your cats outdoors, unless you have an area they cannot get out of like a cat-proof fence around your yard.
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May 18, 2015 19:06
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Stay safe OP.
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May 18, 2015 19:06
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get 50 cats from a shelter and distribute them evenly over about 30 square miles of countryside
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May 18, 2015 19:07
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Crewmine posted:get 50 cats from a shelter and distribute them evenly over about 30 square miles of countryside you are just asking for cats to be cut in half, get 60
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May 18, 2015 19:08
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Crewmine posted:get 50 cats from a shelter and distribute them evenly over about 30 square miles of countryside And the local bird/mice/rat/mole/rabbit population is reduced to zero.
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May 18, 2015 19:09
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If you harm animals I want to harm you. Toes and hammers just like the uzbeks.
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May 18, 2015 19:09
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VendaGoat posted:And the local bird/mice/rat/mole/rabbit population is reduced to zero. birds wake me up at dawn sometimes
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May 18, 2015 19:10
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 01:49 |
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Semper fi all cats should die
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May 18, 2015 19:11
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