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It seems like most of his enemies just tell him and everyone in Gotham what they're planning on doing, or have really obvious gimmicks so when plants start growing all over the city it's not like there's too much confusion on who's doing it. It's more like he just tortures people until they tell him another person he can go assault.
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Jun 29, 2015 06:32
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 03:25 |
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im gay
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Jun 29, 2015 06:35
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but yeah, the "worlds best detective" part doesnt get enough love.
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Jun 29, 2015 06:37
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Slime Bro Helpdesk posted:It's more like he just tortures people until they tell him another person he can go assault. just like real amerikkkan police 
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Jun 29, 2015 06:38
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let me ask him
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Jun 29, 2015 06:38
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it was when he did your mom op had to hunt for ages amongst all the folds
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Jun 29, 2015 06:40
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Sometimes he sticks dirt out stuff in the bat computer and it goes like "beep boop this first has traces of the penguins poop in it" and then batman punches the penguin and puts him in jail for a couple of days.
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Jun 29, 2015 06:40
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Scarecrow has something going on. Again.
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Jun 29, 2015 06:41
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90% of batman comics are him freaking out because he is so poo poo at detectiving that criminals are always getting out of prison on technicalities
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Jun 29, 2015 06:42
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Oberleutnant posted:just like real amerikkkan police Nah. Batman has that whole No Kill policy.
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Jun 29, 2015 06:42
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Like I think the last time I can remember Batman seeming to work out a mystery was the '60s Adam West series where he'd get a riddle or some note from The Joker or The Riddler and he'd solve it in front of the police and be like "He'll be at the candy factory!" and then they run over to the candy factory and Joker or Riddler would be all happy that someone got their puzzle even though they'd now get beat up for all their hard work...
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Jun 29, 2015 06:43
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Slime Bro Helpdesk posted:then they run over to the candy factory and Joker or Riddler would be all happy that someone got their puzzle even though they'd now get beat up for all their hard work... Cause in the 60's, that's as close as they could get to gay marriage.
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Jun 29, 2015 06:45
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Slime Bro Helpdesk posted:Like I think the last time I can remember Batman seeming to work out a mystery was the '60s Adam West series where he'd get a riddle or some note from The Joker or The Riddler and he'd solve it in front of the police and be like "He'll be at the candy factory!" and then they run over to the candy factory and Joker or Riddler would be all happy that someone got their puzzle even though they'd now get beat up for all their hard work... Wouldn't he get a joke from the joker?
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Jun 29, 2015 06:46
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Movies: Batman 89: The Joker just kinda makes himself known to the city and also reveals his evil joker-poison on the evening news. I don't think it ever matters who Joker was? Maybe he tracked down the chemical plant being used to make the toxin but that didn't stop Joker from having a bunch of it. Batman 2: Batman kind of figures out that Penguin is somehow tied to the weird sewer gang, I think? But he's just kind of a weirdo trying to disrupt an election and eventually drives poor Danny Devito insane. Batman w/ Jim Carrey: I don't remember a bunch about this one. Did he have to figure out Nigma was The Riddler? Batman w/ nipples: It's not like it was that hard to track down Arnold Schwarzenegger in a robot suit. Pretty sure I could do that. Batman Begins: Is completely caught off guard by the League of Assassins plot, and who Ras Al Ghul really was. Dark Knight: There's that weird sequence with the bullet and finger print that did...something? And the super-spying device that also did something else? I never understood anything about what Batman was doing in this movie. Dark Knight Rises: Figures out Catwoman was after his fingerprint or something instead of the necklace. Completely whiffs on figuring out Bane's tracking down his secret weapons cache, or who Ras' real kid was.
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Jun 29, 2015 06:54
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Sounds like you haven't read a Batman comic
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Jun 29, 2015 06:54
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Windows 98 posted:Sounds like you haven't read a Batman comic I have not, but this thread can be a place for people to tell me comic stories where Batman did detective work. edit- I read Hush a few years ago. Batman mostly just stumbled around beating up his old enemies until the Hush guy came out of the shadows and was like "ey dipshit, I'm the guy doing all this!" and Batman was again confused. Fidel Cuckstro fucked around with this message at 06:59 on Jun 29, 2015 |
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Jun 29, 2015 06:55
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When I used Detective Mode in Arkham, OP
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Jun 29, 2015 06:55
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the arkham games have some detective stuff. Origins for sure, knight maybe idk Origins has loving hilarious leaps of logic in the long detective sequences but he detectives the gently caress out of mister freeze
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Jun 29, 2015 06:56
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additional movies: Superman vs. Batman: Batman uses his detective skills to determine if Superman bleeds.
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Jun 29, 2015 06:58
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I'm gonna keep this short because if I don't I will just sit in this thread yelling about batman stuff all night and that's stupid. Punching bad guys sells more than detective work, I guess. DC makes bad choices all the time. I mean they hired Ryan Reynolds.
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Jun 29, 2015 07:06
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Fluffy Bunnies posted:I'm gonna keep this short because if I don't I will just sit in this thread yelling about batman stuff all night and that's stupid. That's probably true, but I'm pretty sure there are more pages of Batman comics out there than pages of The New Testament. I have to think there are a few good stories where Batman does actual detective work. Also it's ok to yell about Batman stuff in this thread, although I respect your need to sleep.
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Jun 29, 2015 07:09
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Fictionql detectives usually have a dece detective gimmick. Sherlock does that deductive reasoning, columbo acts scatterbrained and stupid to trick the criminals, poirot is french etc.... All batman do is punch niggas
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Jun 29, 2015 07:10
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Oberleutnant posted:Fictionql detectives usually have a dece detective gimmick. Sherlock does that deductive reasoning, columbo acts scatterbrained and stupid to trick the criminals, poirot is french etc.... All batman do is punch niggas He's also good at sneaking around, which he rarely seems to use as a way to figure out what's going on, and more as a way to jump people and beat them up better.
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Jun 29, 2015 07:19
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In The Dark Knight he drops that Italian off a roof and breaks his legs to figure out where the Joker is. He doesn't solve the mystery, but it's good, solid detective work.
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Jun 29, 2015 07:20
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I think he does some detective work whenever Clayface gets involved in things. Like he hasto find a clue or two to put together that Gordon is actually Clayface in disguise? So there you go, the best Batman-as-detective villain is the big monster made out of clay or makeup or whatever it is.
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Jun 29, 2015 07:25
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Oberleutnant posted:Fictionql detectives usually have a dece detective gimmick. Sherlock does that deductive reasoning, columbo acts scatterbrained and stupid to trick the criminals, poirot is french etc.... All batman do is punch niggas Dick Tracy uses the fact that his first name is dick to make the bad guys laugh and drop their guard so he can swoop in and solve the crime. Ol' Dick is getting the straight poop
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Jun 29, 2015 07:26
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Oberleutnant posted:Fictionql detectives usually have a dece detective gimmick. Sherlock does that deductive reasoning, columbo acts scatterbrained and stupid to trick the criminals, poirot is french etc.... All batman do is punch niggas He also dresses up like a bat
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Jun 29, 2015 07:30
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Maybe they can do a Justice League story where the LEague hires Batman to figure out who's been stealing Green Lantern's lunch from the fridge every day. The secret is it's a team of Superman, Flash, Wonder Woman, etc etc etc working together...mostly doing ti because they think Batman's too dumb to figure this out. Batman waterboards Flash until he gives up the entire conspiracy.
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Jun 29, 2015 07:36
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death .cab for qt posted:the arkham games have some detective stuff. Origins for sure, knight maybe idk Came here to post this, you do a lot of the standard csi drama montage stuff. Also in the various animated series from when we were kids he does a lot of detective work, though a lot of it is off screen or using his miracle computer.
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Jun 29, 2015 07:37
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It turned out Mr. Freeze was in that giant castle made out of ice. Who knew?
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Jun 29, 2015 07:45
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It's worse than that It turns out that Mr Freeze is actually the cryogeneticist, Mr Fries
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Jun 29, 2015 07:48
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ArbitraryC posted:using his miracle computer. He doesn't even use the computer himself anymore, right? Now he has Gordon's crippled daughter as his own personal Siri running google searches for him so he can maximize his time punching people. Does he even pay her?
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Jun 29, 2015 07:50
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1991, in the story "bats mans last case". after that he just rolls around gotham in the bats mobile, beating up the homeless
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Jun 29, 2015 07:50
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Batman notices something sticking out of the dead man's breast pocket. It's a joker playing card. He takes it home to the Bat Cave, takes photographs of it, studies it under a microscope. Batman: What does it mean, Alfred?
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Jun 29, 2015 07:51
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quakster posted:1991, in the story "bats mans last case". after that he just rolls around gotham in the bats mobile, beating up the homeless http://batman.wikia.com/wiki/Batman_Issue_702 Synopsis "Batman's Last Case" Wally mentioned that Bruce had theorized about the bullet traveling through time; As much as Batman goes on about how he's out of his depth here, he's the only person realizing that he's dealing with the New Gods not on a physical level, but an ideological one. The box that Batman's referring to is the Ancestor Box, and he's trying to figure out where it started trapping his life, but it probably opened the day he was born. He's losing his memory of the events as he recounts them, although whether this is due to Omega or the Lump is unclear. Bruce arrives in the past and quickly removes his cape and cowl. Batman is somehow attached to both the Ancestor Box and the hyperfauna, it's why he can still hear the ringing of the box's bells. Anthro dies upon seeing Batman. Bruce removes the recorder, marks his bat, and leaves his cave. What the gently caress does any of this mean?
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Jun 29, 2015 07:53
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nobody knows. thats why he quit
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Jun 29, 2015 08:03
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Remember how The Dark Knight ended with the Riddler leaving cards behind, and then the next movie was 10 years later or something and suddenly Batman was a cripple. What the gently caress?
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Jun 29, 2015 08:08
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=61Hrfujv9c0
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Jun 29, 2015 08:09
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people point to the long halloween as a great example of mystery in batman but bats didnt even figure out who the killer really was or so ive read
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Jun 29, 2015 09:22
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 03:25 |
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Batman just wants to punch bad guys so hard that they pee out their teeth like kidney stones. In order to keep the flow of bad guys coming, he cant detective too hard or else they just go to jail for life, so he subconsciously sabotages the cases just so he can have another go at the bad guys. Batman is a very rich, very angry man that likes to beat up the surprisingly buff poors of Gotham, basically a republican wet dream.
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Jun 29, 2015 09:28
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