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*guy with infowars.com bumper sticker has an all night Beatles Rock Band part on a tuesday*
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Aug 21, 2015 20:24
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I'm the assassin that lives at the end of the hall that reluctantly took in a young girl because her daddy stole drugs and got her whole family murdered.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:24
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Chomp8645 posted:I live in quad style Apartments and the one across from me had all kinds of emergency services the other day, but apparently over like nothing. It was some hispanic guy who doesn't speak any English and for the first time in the history of his residency he was the only one in the apartment. He called 911 for some medical thing apparently. Some firefighters showed up but none of them spoke Spanish so they all just kind of talked with exaggerated words and gestures for a couple minutes. Then the firefighters called in for a cop to come out who could speak some Spanish. he probably got freaked the gently caress out and decided it wasn't worth it
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Aug 21, 2015 20:24
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Chomp8645 posted:About two weeks ago my marine neighbor was drunk as hell at 3:00 AM and having an extremely loud conversation with his grandma, who he also had on speaker loud enough for me to hear. Apparently granny embezzled about $100,000 out of a medical scholarship fund and was going to jail. And let me tell you Mr. Marine really loves his granny was none too loving happy about this. He offered to go AWOL and drive her to Canada to escape prosecution. She declined. He said she should flee on her own to Mexico. She said she would not. He said he would go to Kansas himself and shoot the prosecutor in her case. She said please do not do that. That's half a screenplay right there.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:25
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Fojar38 posted:*hallways smell like weed literally 24/7*
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Aug 21, 2015 20:26
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downstairs neighbor is in his bathroom grunting and screaming SHITTTTT and either murdering someone or dropping an extinction level bomb on his toilet
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Aug 21, 2015 20:26
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someone is cooking something and now your apartment smells like hot dumpster juice
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Aug 21, 2015 20:27
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I wish my life mattered, but it does not.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:27
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Hobohemian posted:That's half a screenplay right there. A lot of crazy poo poo happens in this neighborhood but even I was taken aback by someone loudly making threats to murder a court official with their window open and everything. Anyone walking by could hear that poo poo complete with specific details. Just from my apartment I got grannies name, his name, the state in which granny lives (and the pending case), the type of fund she embezzled from... Like what the gently caress dude. Oh and I almost forgot. Mr. Marine has some serious loving sexism issues. He specifically asked granny if the judge was woman and if the prosecutor was a woman. The judge was not but the prosecutor is. Marine was disturbed by this. Women are immoral and will think nothing of sending someone who stole $100,000 from a medical scholarship fund to jail. EVEN THOUGH THEY WERE DOING IT FOR THEIR FAMILY. A man would obviously understand and be lenient but that cold hearted bitch will send granny to jail. Marine must have had some terrible loving marriage or something. Meme Poker Party fucked around with this message at 20:31 on Aug 21, 2015 |
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Aug 21, 2015 20:28
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Chomp8645 posted:A lot of crazy poo poo happens in this neighborhood but even I was taken aback by someone loudly making threats to murder a court official with their window open and everything. Anyone walking by could hear that poo poo complete with specific details. Just from my apartment I could got grannies name, his name, the state in which granny lives, the type of fund she embezzled from... OORAH
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Aug 21, 2015 20:29
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Will you shut the gently caress up in there, I'm trying to drown myself in alcohol in loving peace. *Smells like vodka, vomits uncontrollably*
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Aug 21, 2015 20:30
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neighbors are fighting again and screaming at each other in somalian or some poo poo
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Aug 21, 2015 20:30
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woman next door is a clown. like for childrens parties. a literal clown.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:31
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*Has to park in Walmart parking lot a 1/4 mile away because all the parking spots are taken*
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Aug 21, 2015 20:33
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I am in a poorly lit laundry room, oh hey it's Three Olives
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Aug 21, 2015 20:35
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one apartment door has two peepholes, one is at about belly button level. does a midget live there? vaguely disconcerting
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Aug 21, 2015 20:35
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Oh Hell No posted:*3 AM, possible drug dealer next door is still blasting '90s techno* That might be me. The Fat of the Land is still a cool album. The overpowering reek of onions, the hordes of screaming unsupervised mexican children, and the occasional dog poo poo in the hall were all on the neighbours. As were the bedbugs. Four times.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:37
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I go to throw out my trash. Beside the dumpster are: *Broken TV with Hatchet Man stickers on it. *Shattered baby-carriage ontop of urine soaked towels. *Stack of National Geographic from late 80's to mid 90's. *One large dog penis shaped dildo.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:38
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The downstairs neighbors got a second beagle. Awesome!
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Aug 21, 2015 20:39
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Xaris posted:*drunk urinates in the alley right under your window at 2am... and then pukes violentally, and then decides while i'm at it to take an explosive poo poo against the wall under your window* Are you my girlfriend?
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Aug 21, 2015 20:39
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Notice a car with expensive rims one afternoon and see it sitting on cinderblocks the following morning.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:39
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can't get anything delivered because your address is a block away from your actual building
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Aug 21, 2015 20:40
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Sex sounds, eventually followed by sex smells.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:42
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Xaris posted:*drunk urinates in the alley right under your window at 2am... and then pukes violentally, and then decides while i'm at it to take an explosive poo poo against the wall under your window* this, only instead of my window its this very thread
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Aug 21, 2015 20:43
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*trying to find out a way to permanently break the 1970s air conditioning unit to get a new one so that my power bill isn't $250 per month during the summer*
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Aug 21, 2015 20:44
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Neighbor decides to leave out catfood to feed all the stray cats. It smells like cat piss outside my door and I can hear the cats fighting/yowling/loving in the middle of the night.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:45
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When I first got married, we lived on the 3rd floor and after a month or so, these two guys who were just out of high school moved in. They were loud as hell and had parties every single weekend with music blasting until like 3 am. In the morning, below the patio, there would be a bunch of cigarette butts and empty beer bottles and cans. I guess the management got shitloads of complaints cuz they were gone within a month and a half.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:46
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texaholic posted:Neighbor decides to leave out catfood to feed all the stray cats. It smells like cat piss outside my door and I can hear the cats fighting/yowling/loving in the middle of the night. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8vAo2gIDSY
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Aug 21, 2015 20:48
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real life experiences: the 2 bull dykes and their twink girl next door are loving very loudly twink girl locked bull dyke out, bull dyke kicked the goddamn door in and gave her a black eye two big fat cousins from detroit are fighting and throwing each other into walls fat black lady neighbor asked gangsta black dude to turn down his music, he flashed a gun then slammed his door in her face middle aged woman downstairs will not stop partying and playing loud as gently caress music all the time since her 70 year old husband died neighbors with mangy indoor/outdoor cats left fleas on the shared porch which have now been tracked into our apartment and have infested our carpet those were some interesting years also the Norfolk pd will not actually write a ticket for a noise because they need a special meter to read the decibels of the disturbance which they conveniently do not have, or at least that's what they told us and the landlord will do nothing, luckily the breaker box for every apartment is located outside
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Aug 21, 2015 20:49
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Had a couple good law enforcement happenings right out in the street here (my apt views the street). 1) Some dude was literally beating his girlfriend in the street. Had her down on the tar, hitting her. I was asleep at first, my girlfriend roused me from sleep then ran out on the balcony and yelled at the dude to cut that poo poo out. Then our old redneck neighbor (who used lived in the unit Mr. Marine now occupies) came out on his balcony and yelled at the dude that he'll gently caress him if he doesn't stop. He's been to prison and he doesn't give a gently caress stop hitting that woman. Dude finally took off after that. Beaten girlfriend declined aid or to file a police report and walked away sobbing. 2) A drunk driver got pulled over right in view of my balcony. Apparently he traveled for bit before stopping and the cops asked him why he didn't stop sooner. He must have been loving drunk because the excuse he came up with was "my brakes don't work". 3) A dude got arrested in the street. While handcuffed face down he kept yelling about police brutality. "This is bullshit this is police brutality I'm gonna sue" over and over. As far I could tell the cops weren't even touching him. A small crowd watched the affair from the sidewalk and his sister or girlfriend or someone kept telling him to shut up every time he said something. 4) There was an explosion. I was chilling in the apt with some friends and just suddenly there was a bang and flash of white light. I ran out to the balcony and saw a dude in a hoody sweater take off down the street. The cops showed up and I told em what I saw but there wasn't much to say about it. Cops left and that was that.
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Aug 21, 2015 20:49
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twink girl from next door came in sobbing to one of the big fat detroit bros and it ended in her sucking his dick detroit bros beg for my pain meds after surgery black couple fight leads out to the porch, dude kicks girl in the stomach then goes back inside black girl knocks on my door at night with a fat bloody lip and says "he beatin me again", i give her a hug, let her inside and begin to call the cops, she tells me not to and goes back granny living with black couple keeps putting their garbage in my garbage can when their can is full neighbors catch a bum sleeping in my jeep with the seat reclined same couple steals cable/internet from my broken into cable box out back Ramsus fucked around with this message at 20:56 on Aug 21, 2015 |
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Aug 21, 2015 20:51
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*gets sex offender notices at least once a month*
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Aug 21, 2015 20:57
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vyst posted:Are you my girlfriend? I can be   for real tho that was the worst part of my apartment building was all the drunk students/homeless. the actual place was fine and i lived across from the landlord without any problems
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Aug 21, 2015 20:59
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Another package I ordered from Amazon is missing.
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Aug 21, 2015 21:00
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hey i live in one of those both in and out of itt *floor is covered in boric acid powder due to massive roach infestation* *skeletal west african muslim immigrant dry humps his wife in the hallway, has five kids and three adult men living in one bedroom unit. Smells like burning orange peels.* *two dudes that look like cartel hitmen from breaking bad sit in the parking lot staring oninously at the back exit* *maintenance takes a month to fix anything*
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Aug 21, 2015 21:01
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SmokaDustbowl posted:one apartment door has two peepholes, one is at about belly button level. does a midget live there? vaguely disconcerting It's for people in wheelchairs. I used to live in a lovely apartment complex. My methhead neighbor ran into my place when I was moving out and stole my TV.
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Aug 21, 2015 21:04
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Skeleton Ape posted:It's for people in wheelchairs. don't spoil the mystery
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Aug 21, 2015 21:06
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This was my experience until we figured out that sound carries so weird in this building that it wasn't our upstairs neighbours, but the weightroom below and to the side of us. Building is pretty rad besides the guy doing Power Cleans every odd week, and now I at least know wtf is making the noise. In previous apartments I put up with mice burrowing massive holes in the wall and living inside my oven, insane redneck homo wrestling, mexicans blasting lovely music and smoking weed at all hours, and a hoarder who shared a bachelor with his son (who poo poo all over the backyard like an animal) and played Command & Conquer and screamed at his computer all day, until he was evicted and when they brought out his appliances they were black with poo poo and crawling roaches. Living with poors loving sucks.
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Aug 21, 2015 21:24
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Wicker Man posted:I go to throw out my trash. Beside the dumpster are: *4 couches and 5 mattresses*
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Aug 21, 2015 21:28
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Blue Raider posted:*4 couches and 5 mattresses* *immigrant strokes chin and smiles* Bugs are an abstract concept in my country, so I must bring these into my building immediately!
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Aug 21, 2015 21:30
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