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What, you want nudes? She did Playboy.
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Sep 23, 2015 05:36
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Hey, everybody got raptured, just saw it on the news.
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Sep 23, 2015 07:07
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Finally. Now there will surely be openings at the Family Dollar.
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Sep 23, 2015 15:18
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I'm all alone at work I guess the rapture happened, even the Muslim guy is gone. EDIT: Turns out it was just lunch break, they had tacos today. Sandweed fucked around with this message at 15:34 on Sep 23, 2015 |
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Sep 23, 2015 15:30
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Is it okay if I ate just before or am I gonna get cramps 
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Sep 23, 2015 15:33
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Tendai posted:Is it okay if I ate just before or am I gonna get cramps It would really suck to be judged by Yahweh, Jesus and Joseph Smith with a wicked charlie horse in your leg.
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Sep 23, 2015 15:43
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Going to post from my bath tub today, i figure the cold stale water will stop any heat effects and its a pretty sturdy old tub!
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Sep 23, 2015 15:58
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String Beans posted:It would really suck to be judged by Yahweh, Jesus and Joseph Smith with a wicked charlie horse in your leg.
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Sep 23, 2015 15:59
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lets do this
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Sep 23, 2015 16:00
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Tendai posted:Yeah that's kind of one of those situations where you'd want to be at your best I'd think. Jesus would be cool about it probably but the other two, who the gently caress knows. God would be a total dick about it. Like Old Testament level of being a dick.
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Sep 23, 2015 16:04
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This sunday is the next rapture. Sunday will present the rarest Supermoon – the first time in more than 30 years we will have a Supermoon and lunar eclipse at the same time. The result: a so-called "blood moon" that some in religious circles are suggesting will signal an end of the world type of event -- a doomsday. http://www.al.com/news/index.ssf/2015/09/four_blood_moons_prophecy_supe.html Edit: this was in the comments section,  Hope this helps. Hooded Reptile fucked around with this message at 16:07 on Sep 23, 2015 |
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Sep 23, 2015 16:04
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I loving love this biblical apocalypse poo poo. hail satan.
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Sep 23, 2015 16:08
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quote:"Over the last 500 years, blood-red moons have fallen on the first day of Passover three separate times. These occurrences were connected to some of the most significant days in Jewish history: 1492 (the final year of the Spanish Inquisition when Jews were expelled from Spain), 1948 (statehood for Israel and the War of Independence) and 1967 (the Six-Day War). Every heavenly body is controlled by the unseen hand of God, which signals coming events to humanity. There are no solar or lunar accidents. The next series of four blood moons occurs at Passover and Sukkot in 2014 and 2015," Hagee writes in material promoting his book Four Blood Moons. makes sense
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Sep 23, 2015 16:08
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you especially know it's all over when the white stick ppl are genociding the black stick ppl
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Sep 23, 2015 16:46
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I thought a blood moon was when you show someone your really bad hemorrhoid and it bursts.
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Sep 23, 2015 23:57
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So apparently the asteroid hit and we were all raptured up. Muslims, atheists -- everyone. It turns out that heaven is exactly the same as earth, so you better get up and go to work tomorrow or you'll get fired by Jesus. And that does not look good on your resume.
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Sep 24, 2015 05:51
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Posting from work to confirm, Jesus is the worst boss.
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Sep 24, 2015 08:35
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The rapture actually happens every single day at 3pm UTC, but no one really gets raptured because everyone is actually a piece of poo poo no matter how good a game face they put on.
Harrower fucked around with this message at 08:57 on Sep 24, 2015 |
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Sep 24, 2015 08:54
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Cantaloupe posted:gonna celebrate the rapture with a "fapture" (that's where I masturbate to pornstars who have become born-again christians) Who's on your list? All I got is Erica Campbell.
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Sep 24, 2015 08:55
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gently caress, I slept through half of rapture day, and I haven't seen anybody since I woke up, I'm all alone!
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Sep 24, 2015 08:59
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the crapture
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Sep 24, 2015 09:30
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why do you want to be picked up for a rape anyay
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Sep 24, 2015 10:23
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"rapture" (n.) a feeling of intense pleasure or joy; with the sense of "seizing and carrying off" by joy, irresistible enthusiasm, forceful joy. obs. One might "be raptured" (v. w/ obj.) during the Rapture (n.), and if so he is seized by joy and carried off to heaven by it (going towards the light, which we commonly characterize as irresistible: "don't go towards the light" (Late 16 cent.; (sense: "seizing and carrying off"): obs. Fr. or med. Latin raptura = "seizing") It is partly influenced by adj. rapt [pred.: late M.E.] (sense: "transported by religious feeling"): from Latin raptus = "seized" [p.p. rapere].raper Late M.E. arc. or lit. (having been carried away bodily or transported to heaven); functionally the same as Mod. "be raptured" (v. w/ obj.). Deriv. of Mod. rape = [1.: crime or act of forcing sexual intercourse without consent (n. & v.)] – [2.: wanton destruction or spoiling of a place / area (v. w./ obj.)] = (a wrongful seizure) Deriv.: raper (n.) l. M.E. (orig.: violent seizure of property; late → violent/forceful seizure of a woman*): from A-N Fr. rap (n.), raper (v.), from Latin rapere "seize." ------- this is also where the blacks "rap" comes from
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Sep 24, 2015 10:24
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Tendai posted:Yeah that's kind of one of those situations where you'd want to be at your best I'd think. Jesus would be cool about it probably but the other two, who the gently caress knows. you stupid fucker if you can't buck up for one second for the Lord gently caress you, you're the kid who would cry when a teacher would say you got an answer wrong in front of the class i bet
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Sep 24, 2015 10:26
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lol ya get that pussy rustem
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Sep 24, 2015 10:31
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whenever I think about the rapture I think about michelle bachmanns eyes
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Sep 24, 2015 10:33
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Yo that was sick
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Sep 24, 2015 16:05
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We're all still here. Guess Protestants are fuckwits after all.
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Sep 24, 2015 16:30
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so this IS hell
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Sep 24, 2015 16:56
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Nation posted:so this IS hell
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Sep 24, 2015 17:20
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it could still happen apparently during anytime in september or this year or this millenium or ever
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Sep 24, 2015 17:21
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Ruggan posted:it could still happen apparently during anytime in september I remember that one religious old guy that kept saying the rapture was coming on so and so date. It always passed with nothing, he set a new date. I think he retired now tho
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Sep 24, 2015 17:26
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Like I already said the rapture is on tomorrow, 25th because the new moon wasn't seen right away in Israel.
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Sep 24, 2015 17:28
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Haha a bunch of the crazy Mormons in my state believe it's the second coming of Jesus Christ this sunday. But they are not heading to doomsday bunkers since supposedly Jesus will come back and have a 1000 year Reich under his rule or that's what I'm told by my neighbors
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Sep 24, 2015 17:48
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Darth123123 posted:I remember that one religious old guy that kept saying the rapture was coming on so and so date. It always passed with nothing, he set a new date. I think he retired now tho He died, actually
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Sep 24, 2015 19:36
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Edgar posted:Haha a bunch of the crazy Mormons in my state believe it's the second coming of Jesus Christ this sunday. But they are not heading to doomsday bunkers since supposedly Jesus will come back and have a 1000 year Reich under his rule or that's what I'm told by my neighbors Make sure the bed spread is made!!! Jésus is sleeping over this weekend
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Sep 24, 2015 19:37
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Edgar posted:Haha a bunch of the crazy Mormons in my state believe it's the second coming of Jesus Christ this sunday. But they are not heading to doomsday bunkers since supposedly Jesus will come back and have a 1000 year Reich under his rule or that's what I'm told by my neighbors Silly nuts, a blood moon is not jesus
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Sep 24, 2015 19:45
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So everyone is obviously still here. Except Lowtax, but that could be anything. Could be aliens.
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Sep 27, 2015 03:43
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Tomorrow is the day. Monday the 28th. Pregaming at my place
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Sep 27, 2015 07:10
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| # ? Apr 26, 2024 16:23 |
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9:07 p.m EST gods time zone, is when the moon with become red, fully at 10:11 EST p.m roughly, and last for a half an hour. God help you in that half hour. Also, if it's cloudy out you are safe from the moon rays of evil.
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Sep 27, 2015 18:32
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