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I decided to get tested for STIs and the tech or whoever that's taking my blood says, "We're required to ask this by the government: do you have sex with men?" I'm about to answer but then he continues. "Because we have anal infection testing at no extra charge to you." It took a second for me to process that and I answered truthfully, "No. No, I don't do that." It felt really weird to give that answer. I've been blown by three different dudes in one day before but I guess that's not good enough. To Uncle Sam you're not gay unless you do the buttsex apparently! This reminds me of once after I ate out one of my female friends and she said that in return she'd let me gently caress her in the rear end. I was like, "You think I like that just cause I'm gay, don't you?" I was a little offended to be honest.
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Sep 22, 2015 20:52
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lizardman posted:I decided to get tested for STIs and the tech or whoever that's taking my blood says, "We're required to ask this by the government: do you have sex with men?" Good for u
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Sep 22, 2015 20:53
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what the hell was the name of the man giving you the AIDS test OP
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Sep 22, 2015 20:54
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I came out of the closet today. I said "dads. dads i'm straight"
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Sep 22, 2015 20:54
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lizardman posted:I decided to get tested for STIs and the tech or whoever that's taking my blood says, "We're required to ask this by the government: do you have sex with men?" Don't lie to the government, they don't like it when you lie.
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Sep 22, 2015 20:55
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lizardman posted:I decided to get tested for STIs and the tech or whoever that's taking my blood says, "We're required to ask this by the government: do you have sex with men?" men blowing you all over the place but you wont even give them a piece of that rear end? a bad lover
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Sep 22, 2015 20:56
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Why didn't you just say yes and get an extra test for free? I pretend to be gay to get free STD tests all the time.
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Sep 22, 2015 20:59
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Molentik posted:Why didn't you just say yes and get an extra test for free? I pretend to be gay to get free STD tests all the time. I guess I could have, but I don't have any real reason to suspect my anus would be infected, and also I just didn't want to lie.
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Sep 22, 2015 21:01
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if blowjobs aren't considered sex i'm still a virgin
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Sep 22, 2015 21:03
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I'm gay
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Sep 22, 2015 21:04
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i can't give blood because of africa
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Sep 22, 2015 21:04
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Seriously, I've even run across confused straight guys who think they're gay because of this. We'd start messing around and it's clear he's awkward / not turned on and I'd tell him "it's OK if you're not into me, I'm not offended." And he says "It's not that, it's just that I'm only really interested in taking it up the rear end." Then I have to explain to him that anal has nothing to do with being gay and he would probably have a better time getting his girlfriend to use a dildo on him. This has happened to me at least twice.
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Sep 22, 2015 21:14
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You turned down a free anal infection test????
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Sep 22, 2015 21:17
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Arian_Samurai posted:You turned down a free anal infection test????
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Sep 22, 2015 21:18
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You are a liar, which is easily proven by anyone who has been in the same situation as you have in your state, which would be hundreds of posters most likelly, and also you're disingenious because you didn't even make your dumb story interesting any way. Choke on gay sex cocks, gay, lol, homo sex funny lol wtf. Hurf durf, herpedety derp. I also doubt you are fluent in English. Anal infection test, did you seriously think that was in any way believable?
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Sep 22, 2015 21:20
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The government knows what's up. The government doesn't consider me a 'Man' Can minors post on the forums now? This bitch is twelve years old, tops physically. Mentally maybe nine, on a good day. Lol homo put peenie in the bumbum *snort*
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Sep 22, 2015 21:23
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At least we know you have no famil, being a cockgobbler as you say, but that aside, do definitely kill you're self. (And your famil)
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Sep 22, 2015 21:24
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Guy was hitting on you, idiot
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Sep 22, 2015 21:24
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Thank god you're doing everything in your power to prove them wrong OP
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Sep 22, 2015 21:25
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plain blue jacket posted:Guy was hitting on you, idiot D'OH! I didn't think of this. Oh well, he probably would've just wanted me to stick it up his pooper anyways.
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Sep 22, 2015 21:27
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I'm straight
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Sep 22, 2015 21:27
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In NYC there are city run offices that give basically any vaccination for free no questions asked, the drawback being of course that this requires you show up at about 4am to get in line so they get to you before they run out of time in their day. Hep A however is only offered for free to men willing to state they have sex with other men. Iiafi (it is a funding issue) Op u gay U GAY U GAYYY
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Sep 22, 2015 21:28
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don't worry OP, on the internet you'll always be considered a human being
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Sep 22, 2015 21:29
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lizardman posted:D'OH! I didn't think of this. Which you've never done. Cuz you're not a man who has sex with men, you just have a cock that men who have sex with men cannot resist sucking. That is basically your narrrative, right?
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Sep 22, 2015 21:29
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Your Dead Gay Son posted:I'm straight This is a better question, can you be straight in italics?! Can anything?
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Sep 22, 2015 21:29
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Your Dead Gay Son posted:I'm straight https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B_exvKnrK6g
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Sep 22, 2015 21:30
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OPFAG, when this invariably goes not the way you had envisioned, are you gonna A) backpedal or B) go straight to puppetmaster? Because I might stick around if it's the latter.
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Sep 22, 2015 21:32
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This one time I was loving a chick so as not to be all the way gay and she wanted me to stick it in her rear end because my cock is magic and I was offended because this entire thing wasn't real and I made it up.
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Sep 22, 2015 21:36
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rejutka posted:This one time I was loving a chick so as not to be all the way gay and she wanted me to stick it in her rear end because my cock is magic and I was offended because this entire thing wasn't real and I made it up. What happened next man? Don't leave us hanging.  <- no penis in this please, no homo
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Sep 22, 2015 21:39
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She was so angry she offered me a free anal infection test.
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Sep 22, 2015 21:43
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rejutka posted:She was so angry she offered me a free anal infection test. Did you get the results yet or are tehy in the post? Anal infection teste sounds like a real medical thing that is not to be taken lightly. How infection is your anal? Found out today by taking this easy test online!
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Sep 22, 2015 21:45
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You can tell this is prime grade GBS by how nobody made a momdicum of effort.
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Sep 22, 2015 21:46
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they said my rear end had an infarction
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Sep 22, 2015 21:49
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So did you gently caress your girl friend in the rear end or not? Maybe she needs an anal infection test
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Sep 22, 2015 21:49
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how me a frog posted:Did you get the results yet or are tehy in the post? Anal infection teste sounds like a real medical thing that is not to be taken lightly. How infection is your anal? Found out today by taking this easy test online! I was so angry I left to make out with not gay dudes who want me to rear end gently caress them because they are not gay.
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Sep 22, 2015 21:50
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So is this IOU 1 buttfuck transferable or not OP?
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Sep 22, 2015 21:59
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lizardman posted:Man Who Has Sex With Men what a turn off! 
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Sep 22, 2015 22:00
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op didnt even have the god drat courtesy to give a reach around
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Sep 22, 2015 22:12
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Aralan posted:So did you gently caress your girl friend in the rear end or not? Maybe she needs an anal infection test Nah I didn't, she's safe. Also my tests came back all negative so she would've been OK anyhow. Also she wasn't my girlfriend, she's just a friend. I'm gay. The Brown Menace posted:don't worry OP, on the internet you'll always be considered a human being This is heartwarming!
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Sep 22, 2015 22:28
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lizardman posted:I'm gay. loving hell, enough with the goddamn memes already.
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Sep 22, 2015 22:31
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