I am user zero

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > General Bullshit > I am user zero

Ben Murphy: Sep 9, 2001; I like him in spite of the fact that he's not me.

http://forums.somethingawful.com/member.php?action=getinfo&userid=0

years of fearful lurking finally paid off, top of the shitheap as it were

i have watched my enemies slain before me, and i emerged unscathed, if i have posted further it's because i have stood on the shoulders of giants

used to have an account back in 99, i think i said a dumb thing to lowtax and he gave me the boot, i was a college punk and likely deserved it

SA is one of the only sites that has stayed in my bookmark bar over the years and i still check drat near everyday

despite being outside the site's normal demographic (i don't play video games or know anything about anime, wrestling, drugs, guns, sports, etc) i've always found the posters here to provide some of the most consistently funny material i can read online, even if it's a topic i don't give two shits about

well that's all i wanted to say, been seeing lots of posts again about the death and demise of SA and figured i should speak my peace

here's the oldest photo i have in my SA folder which has somehow survived years of digital moving, enjoy

# ? Sep 23, 2015 08:37

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Apr 27, 2024 06:05

Pontificating Ass: Aug 2, 2002; What Doth Life?

same

# ? Sep 23, 2015 08:39

steinrokkan: Apr 2, 2011; Soiled Meat

I had no idea people used those awful ^__^ smileys in 99

# ? Sep 23, 2015 08:41

Otacon: Aug 13, 2002

your story and my story are very similar, OP

very, very similar.

i think we may be the same person????

# ? Sep 23, 2015 09:03

Dr. Lariat: Jul 1, 2004; by Lowtax

Old timers club meetup. By my regdate you may assume I joined for filez. Thats probably a pretty good guess.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 09:08

The Brown Menace: Dec 24, 2010; Now comes in all colors.

user zero good posts

# ? Sep 23, 2015 09:26

Ahundredbux: Oct 25, 2007; The right to bear arms

oh, now I get it!!

# ? Sep 23, 2015 09:27

Harrower: Nov 30, 2002

Don't think I've ever seen user 0 make good posts. That guy is a piece of poo poo.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 11:16

Stick Figure Mafia: Dec 11, 2004

# ? Sep 23, 2015 11:21

les fleurs du mall: Jun 30, 2014; by LadyAmbien

whoooopshhwiishh im flying the millenial falcon

# ? Sep 23, 2015 12:12

Hector Beerlioz: Jun 16, 2010; aw, hec

I want my 30 seconds back

# ? Sep 23, 2015 12:51

let it mellow: Jun 1, 2000; Dinosaur Gum

fuckin noobs

# ? Sep 23, 2015 13:05

Kharnifex: Sep 11, 2001; The Banter is better in AusGBS

He Hench's for no man.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 13:12

rejutka: May 28, 2004; by zen death robot

You're the one responsible for the forum AIDS? For shame.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 13:24

AbbadonOfHell: Jul 16, 2004; You know I would try to think of something funny to put here but ill just pass on that and threaten people with a + 2 board with a nail in it.

Photoshoppery was the reason I showed up but then I just started lurking. I do remember the :filez:

days though.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:22

bog pixie: Feb 23, 2013

Ben Murphy posted:

Rest in peace, LurkerX.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:28

soy: Jul 7, 2003; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

I regged because I thought a forum with a :420:

emoticon would be hella funny looollolol

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:29

SOME PIG: Aug 12, 2004; Hittin' Switches,
Twistin' wigs with
Phat Radical Mathematical type Scriptures

I didn't get so many drat filez from this site back in the day. That poo poo was awesome.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:32

social vegan: Nov 7, 2014

ur a zero alright

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:33

the future is WOW: Sep 9, 2005; I QUIT!

It's pretty funny that people still fall for that little trick.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:41

SOME PIG: Aug 12, 2004; Hittin' Switches,
Twistin' wigs with
Phat Radical Mathematical type Scriptures

People used to post these long, insane stories back then and everyone would eat it up and say things like, "Sir, if you're ever in [obscure podunk shithole] I'd like to buy you a beer!" This was a simpler time when people would basically believe whatever stdh you told them without question. It was super pathetic, but tbh I miss some of the stories people would come up with.

Edit: the last one I remember was the guy who worked at a hotel or something and was friends with all these billionaires and supermodels. Some goons were so impressed they started getting these gang titles that said "old fashioned." Does anyone know what I'm talking about?

SOME PIG fucked around with this message at 14:48 on Sep 23, 2015

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:43

penus penus penus: Nov 9, 2014; by piss__donald

i joined for the porn, which was promptly removed

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:44

ANIME IS BLOOD: Sep 4, 2008; by zen death robot

THE DOG HOUSE posted:

i joined for the porn, which was promptly removed

so it's your fault then

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:49

the future is WOW: Sep 9, 2005; I QUIT!

dethkon posted:

People used to post these long, insane stories back then and everyone would eat it up and say things like, "Sir, if you're ever in [obscure podunk shithole] I'd like to buy you a beer!" This was a simpler time when people would basically believe whatever stdh you told them without question. It was super pathetic, but tbh I miss some of the stories people would come up with.

Even as STDH some of it was pretty entertaining. It was a good way to while away the time during a boring overnight shift.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:49

penus penus penus: Nov 9, 2014; by piss__donald

ANIME IS BLOOD posted:

so it's your fault then

it was annoying because i think i stole my moms credit card to join

but yeah sorry about that

# ? Sep 23, 2015 14:56

CloFan: Nov 6, 2004

I miss when the internet was the wild west and you could get away with poo poo

# ? Sep 23, 2015 15:03

Masturbasturd: Sep 1, 2014

Hence the conundrum we're in now

# ? Sep 23, 2015 15:05

Skeleton Ape: Dec 21, 2008

dethkon posted:

People used to post these long, insane stories back then and everyone would eat it up and say things like, "Sir, if you're ever in [obscure podunk shithole] I'd like to buy you a beer!" This was a simpler time when people would basically believe whatever stdh you told them without question. It was super pathetic, but tbh I miss some of the stories people would come up with.

Edit: the last one I remember was the guy who worked at a hotel or something and was friends with all these billionaires and supermodels. Some goons were so impressed they started getting these gang titles that said "old fashioned." Does anyone know what I'm talking about?

I'll admit I joined because of the Martin Random poo poo lasagna story

# ? Sep 23, 2015 15:07

welcome 2 Clown Town: Aug 1, 2006; GALAXY'S #2 SCULL*!

*scrunt skull

i joined because of TFR but i lurked for years before then because of the photoshops

im a bad person and i should eat poo poo

# ? Sep 23, 2015 16:04

Prawned: Oct 25, 2010

Ben Murphy posted:

http://forums.somethingawful.com/member.php?action=getinfo&userid=0

years of fearful lurking finally paid off, top of the shitheap as it were

i have watched my enemies slain before me, and i emerged unscathed, if i have posted further it's because i have stood on the shoulders of giants

used to have an account back in 99, i think i said a dumb thing to lowtax and he gave me the boot, i was a college punk and likely deserved it

SA is one of the only sites that has stayed in my bookmark bar over the years and i still check drat near everyday

despite being outside the site's normal demographic (i don't play video games or know anything about anime, wrestling, drugs, guns, sports, etc) i've always found the posters here to provide some of the most consistently funny material i can read online, even if it's a topic i don't give two shits about

well that's all i wanted to say, been seeing lots of posts again about the death and demise of SA and figured i should speak my peace

here's the oldest photo i have in my SA folder which has somehow survived years of digital moving, enjoy

Hello, how are you

# ? Sep 23, 2015 16:05

Son of Rodney: Feb 22, 2006; ohmygodohmygodohmygod

dethkon posted:

People used to post these long, insane stories back then and everyone would eat it up and say things like, "Sir, if you're ever in [obscure podunk shithole] I'd like to buy you a beer!" This was a simpler time when people would basically believe whatever stdh you told them without question. It was super pathetic, but tbh I miss some of the stories people would come up with.

Edit: the last one I remember was the guy who worked at a hotel or something and was friends with all these billionaires and supermodels. Some goons were so impressed they started getting these gang titles that said "old fashioned." Does anyone know what I'm talking about?

I remember voicing criticism every once in a while at some of those lovely stories and everyone was like "who cares if its fake, it's a good story!!. I care, every dumb fucker ever can make up something, it's the fact that it really happened that makes it good.

This one time SA also convinced some dwarf in a wheelchair to write a book about his slightly interesting life, which didn't work out at all and he was pretty pissed at the end, someone remember this?

# ? Sep 23, 2015 16:12

Diesel Fucker: Aug 14, 2003; I spent my rent money on tentacle porn.

did airdisc ever come back?

# ? Sep 23, 2015 16:16

milkingmycow: Mar 28, 2008; by Cyrano4747

Thinking of buying an coconut and posting.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 16:46

aioli is just mayo: Aug 14, 2003; He has only forbidden to you dead animals, blood, the flesh of swine, and that which has been dedicated to other than Allah . But whoever is forced by necessity, neither desiring it nor transgressing its limit, there is no sin upon him. Indeed, Allah is Forgiving and Merciful

There used to be "Forum mentors" and you would add them on AOL Instant Messenger and they would tell you not to post some things. Mine was Karabiner I think, obviously I never listened to him because I've remained a shitposter to this day.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 16:49

Otacon: Aug 13, 2002

Lasher posted:

did airdisc ever come back?

yes actually

i remember airdisc

# ? Sep 23, 2015 21:03

Michael Bayleaf: Jun 4, 2006; Tortured By Flan

it took me a long time to join because I was too busy failing out of school because all I did was play MMOs

# ? Sep 23, 2015 21:11

Nathilus: Apr 4, 2002; I alone can see through the media bias.

I'm also stupid on a scale that can only be measured in Reddits.

Dr. Lariat posted:

Old timers club meetup. By my regdate you may assume I joined for filez. Thats probably a pretty good guess.

Wow gratz you are everything i hate in a sa user. A loving 04 here for da filez, AND an avatarless prole. Goddamn. You are everything thats wrong with sa and why we arent on top anymore.

We can still be cool tho, cuz old timers gotta stick together.

# ? Sep 23, 2015 21:16