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Every single time I mention anything about my job to goons I am met with an overwhelming response of "Holy poo poo get a new job before you kill yourself". Recently, in the poo poo about your work thread, people seemed to think I was literally being screwed legally and ethically (and I'm sure they are correct). I mentioned making a thread specifically about my job and people were interested due to just how ridiculous it is. This post is going to run long because there is just so much ridiculous poo poo.  The good stuff is about the customers I deal with, so if you don't want to read about how management and our parent company is ruining my life, and just want some good laughs and no  then just head on down to that section. This is going to be a serial series of updates. I have a lot of regular gamblers I deal with, and I can't fit them all into one OP. It'll be a bit like the old days when people could tell stories and others gave a poo poo on these wonderful gay dead forums.So let's start with the job itself before moving on to the customers I deal with. I work at a convenience store that ranks in the top 5 for highest lottery revenue in the state. Most convenience stores will do around $500-800 in lottery a day depending on where they are located. My store does many thousands every day, just to kind of put things in perspective. This is actually a small town, not a city. Our town is just filled with severe gambling addicts. This means for me that every single day is a constant stream of customers with nearly no time to collect myself. But Windows, aren't you supposed to work while at work? Why expect time to yourself? Well what I really mean is that I do not get breaks. When I was hired I signed a contract stating that I waived my lunch and 15 minute break rights. It was nonnegotiable and if I wanted to work I had to sign. It also included that I would work 3 holidays a year. Our parent company only classifies July 4th, Christmas, New Years, and Thanksgiving as holidays. Because I was hired after July 4th, this means I will be working the rest of the 3 holidays this year. The contract also stated I do not get time and a half for overtime or Sundays. Some goon says this is legal because we have less than 100 employees or something. Currently I am scheduled 39 hours a week, because giving me 40 means they would have to give me benefits. God forbid. However, due to some circumstances I am actually working closer to 60 hours. Recently we lost 3 employees. One was transferred for stealing poo poo from the store (good for him), one was fired for getting caught in a sting operation for not carding minors, and the third was fired for a reason that is still a mystery because management will not budge with any details. Unfortunately they managed to fire the wrong people, because I am still stuck with Amanda. Amanda is one special coworker. She is in her 30s and is the epitome of not giving a gently caress. She is homeless, and crashes on the couch of a former employee. She has more rings in her face than my girlfriend has on her whole body, LOVES Slipknot and grunge music, which fits her appearance well, and is a die hard "rebel" complete with confederate flag tattoos (we live in New England). Amanda has a reputation for not showing up on time. Not just a few minutes, I'm talking a few hours. I can almost reliably count on her being late an hour to every single shift. This is especially problematic because she is the graveyard shift and I am the mid day shift. I'm assigned homework (sometimes even that day, on T/TH I go to school for 5 hours before I go to work) that is usually due at midnight. When she shows up at 11 but was scheduled for 9, and I have a 50 question quiz or homework due in less than an hour.... well you can do the math. Management can't fire her because we are already so desperately short handed, and not a soul is applying to this poo poo show of a job. On top of being serial tardy and making my school life even more difficult (don't fret goons I am still rocking an A average), she is also a horrible employee when she is here. Things like standing outside for hours talking to her boyfriend, stealing, yelling at customers, swearing at children, etc. Just use your imagination. Imagine the worst employee possible. That's her. I don't want to dwell too much into the job itself because this thread is really all about the customers that come through. If you have more questions about how they are raping my soul or want to know about any of the other colorful people I work with just ask. It might come up on its own as I explain things. I'm going to try and grab pictures of people as they come through. There are a lot of these people, and due to their nature as gambling addicts sometimes they go to other stores to play those tickets if they had bad luck at ours the day before or whatever. I don't know what goes on in their melted brains.So, without further adue... The CustomersEd  Ed has got to be one of the best regular gamblers that I deal with. He comes in usually every other day. Ed keeps to himself and loves Keno. He's retired, and really just is looking for something to do with his time. He is kinda . Ed plays usually for 1-2 hours at a time, with his usually $5 bet. He is almost not noteworthy enough to include in this list because he spends very little, but due to the length and frequency of his visits I decided to include him. My life would be a lot loving easier if all my customers were like Ed.Virginia  Virginia is hard to look at. Her fly as hell sunglasses she wears distract from the full grey mustache on her lip. She has a deep growl for a voice. A voice that says "I've smoked more cigarettes than there are stars in the sky". Virginia will stay usually for 2 hours, leaving her dog in the car with her windows rolled up ("so he doesn't escape during my games"). Virginia is a huge fan of both Keno and scratchers but mostly sticks to Keno. Each round her usual bet is $28. She will usually spend a couple hundred before giving up for the day. If she is winning she will stay much longer than usual. You know... just to make certain she spends every cent she has. She comes back in when she gets more money which Im fairly certain is whenever her social security check comes in. Shifty Eyes  Shifty Eyes is called Shifty Eyes because every time she comes to the counter she has the perfect look on her face that just screams "I don't trust you". Shifty Eyes only scratches, no Keno for her. She is what I call a speed scratcher. She is so focused on scratching that she sometimes won't make it off the counter before starting. If there's a line she will even scratch while she walks to the coffee counter. Her visits last dramatically shorter than most of my regulars, usually only 30 minutes. She sure as poo poo makes up for it though by spending a heinous amount of money. She buys tickets $20-40 at a time and will usually spend close to $1,000 each visit. If she doesn't win anything significant she will start running out of money and buying the lower end tickets, but won't stop until she is broke. Occasionally she will go back and forth like a ping pong ball out to her car to scratch for no real reason. I think it's because she's convinced that was her last round and she's going to leave. If she runs out of money there is a 50/50 chance she will leave for an hour and come back with more. From where? Who knows. I strongly dislike this woman because she keeps me more busy than any other customer due to the speed at which she scratches. Sometimes she will literally only scratch the codes and not even play the card. As I type this very paragraph she has interrupted me like 10 loving times, on her second visit of the day. gently caress you shifty eyes, let me  already.Ok so I think that's a long enough OP for now. I know those customers don't sound very outrageous, especially Ed. But those are just a couple I managed to snag today. Sundays are odd, I don't usually work them. I wasn't sure who would be coming through. I can assure you the other regular gamblers I get are far more interesting than these 3. Bear with me throughout the week as they each come in and I can promise they will be worth the read. Some of these people literally belong in a circus, not a convenience store.
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Nov 9, 2015 01:48
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Ed seems a bit adorable and sad.  Elderly people are depressing.
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Nov 9, 2015 01:52
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god bless you and your wageslave stories for making my sunday night doldrums more bearable e: also ed looks like my grandpa and i find that cool
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Nov 9, 2015 01:56
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I worked in a Casino, and thought gambling was stupid, then when I started to make OK money I started gambling and occasionally win a $1,000+. I didn't know people get obsessed with scratch tickets, must not be many conventional type casino environments in New England.
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Nov 9, 2015 01:56
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Kuato posted:I worked in a Casino, and thought gambling was stupid, then when I started to make OK money I started gambling and occasionally win a $1,000+. I didn't know people get obsessed with scratch tickets, must not be many conventional type casino environments in New England. We have one in MA and one in CT (Foxwoods and Twin Rivers). That's all.
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Nov 9, 2015 01:59
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i thought only teenagers, addicts and the mentally retarded worked at gas stations
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Nov 9, 2015 02:00
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Profondo Rosso posted:i thought only teenagers, addicts and the mentally retarded worked at gas stations windows98 isn't a teenager he just looks like one, does that still count?
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Nov 9, 2015 02:03
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So glad I don't have to deal with lotto tickets where I work. Just scooping ice cream and authorizing gasoline.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:03
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Profondo Rosso posted:i thought only teenagers, addicts and the mentally retarded worked at gas stations
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Nov 9, 2015 02:03
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Im gonna buy some weed soon. I feel really bad i dont know if im having a bit of weed withdrawal. I also ran out of xanax that could be it.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:03
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Im on a break at my minumum wage job i do as an adult
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Nov 9, 2015 02:04
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Isaac posted:Im on a break at my minumum wage job i do as an adult Break? What is a break? I'm on hour 8 of 10. No breaks, no chairs, no fatigue mats, no food.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:06
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I think you should probably turn to crime OP
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Nov 9, 2015 02:07
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is 2015 better than 2014, op?
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Nov 9, 2015 02:08
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Also steal some food. If you work in the place you should know how to get away with stealing from it if you aren't a complete moron.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:08
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if your job is so horrible why haven't you looked for another one? I mean from the sound of things you're one of the few (if not the only) competent employee there so when you leave the store will crash and burn.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:09
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Cowman posted:if your job is so horrible why haven't you looked for another one? if i remember correctly w98 lives in westernma. unless he wants to become a farmer there aint too much besides gas stations
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Nov 9, 2015 02:10
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Profondo Rosso posted:if i remember correctly w98 lives in westernma. unless he wants to become a farmer there aint too much besides gas stations he could get a job a one of the billion colleges out there. (but maybe his felonious background is preventing him from doing so?)
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Nov 9, 2015 02:14
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do you ever tell them that they might as well be putting their money directly into the trash, op?
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Nov 9, 2015 02:14
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drat do they not have community college or trade schools where you live?
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Nov 9, 2015 02:15
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Cowman posted:if your job is so horrible why haven't you looked for another one? Because I am working 60 hours a week, going to school full time and maintaining an A average, have a girlfriend, and am currently apartment hunting. I have very little free time to job hunt. I hardly eat or sleep. I know it's not technically the best excuse but I generally try and sleep if I have free time. After I find a new apartment I'll be putting more effort into a job hunt. I agree, I do need a new job.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:19
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there's gotta be a walgreens you can apply at
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Nov 9, 2015 02:19
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Kleen_TheRowdyDog posted:is 2015 better than 2014, op? Depends. Are you still a drunk posting from a halfway house with delusions that he is a lawyer from an Ivy League school?
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Nov 9, 2015 02:20
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When/where do you piss/poo poo?
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Nov 9, 2015 02:21
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Utz posted:When/where do you piss/poo poo? This is my backroom  I'll usually lock the door and put up a sign of I need to poo poo. I'll then enjoy it it as long as I can until I hear literal smashing on the door.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:26
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how are you getting away with a literal e/n thread in gbs
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Nov 9, 2015 02:29
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cram me sideways posted:how are you getting away with a literal e/n thread in gbs Very carefully.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:30
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Its been 30mins and ate a medium bacon deluxe meal and smkoing cigarette in my car. No call from the weed man tho
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Nov 9, 2015 02:30
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What of the skull?
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Nov 9, 2015 02:31
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Because it's not really an e/n about my job that was just some backstory. The thread is really about the weird customers I get. This is an ongoing case study, based on humor. I kept the shittiness of the job in general to a minimum to avoid getting in e/n territory. I just felt some insight to the job overall really helps sell the full experience.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:31
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seriously, apply at walgreens
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Nov 9, 2015 02:32
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Isaac posted:Its been 30mins and ate a medium bacon deluxe meal and smkoing cigarette in my car. No call from the weed man tho good stuff. make sure to keep us updated. i just took more concerta cuz im gunna be up all night studying and ordered a calzone (bacon ranch)
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Nov 9, 2015 02:32
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Do you jack off back there? If so, do you close and lock the door when you do? Are you separated by glass from the store? Show a picture of your register area please.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:33
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If you are the weed man can you please show up soon with some benzos as well please.
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Nov 9, 2015 02:33
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I feel for ya OP, I had a friend who used to work at a gas station too and he couldn't stand "the scratchers" either. 
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Nov 9, 2015 02:35
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Windows 98 posted:Depends. Are you still a drunk posting from a halfway house with delusions that he is a lawyer from an Ivy League school? But how's about you?
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Nov 9, 2015 02:37
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If the weed man shows up when im back and work im going to have to be like 'boss i need to go get in some guys car out the front for like 5 minutes'
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Nov 9, 2015 02:39
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First of all, it was rhetorical, no one gives a gently caress about you or your life. Secondly, get the gently caress out of the thread just because. E:whoops. Pretend I quoted him
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Nov 9, 2015 02:39
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Windows 98 posted:First of all, it was rhetorical, no one gives a gently caress about you or your life. Secondly, get the gently caress out of the thread just because. You said this isn't an e/n thread but it's quickly turning into one
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Nov 9, 2015 02:41
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reason I ask about the skull is because I was thinkin of you jackin off in there with that skull i jacked off with a human skull once, a real one i stared into where its eyes used to be as I did my dirty business shoot my spunk into the eye socket shoot it into the spine hole shoot it into the other socket into the nose hole between the jaws it was like I was trying to make it live again by loading it with semen where the brains used to be
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Nov 9, 2015 02:42
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