The Superbowl Party Food Thread: Eat Your Sorrows

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GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

A little bittersweet to be the one posting this again, but I figured it'd help considering the SB is mere weeks away.

This is the Superbowl Party Food thread! Post your recipes, culinary innovations, and misadventures in food here so that others may share in your socially acceptable gluttony.

General housekeeping:

1) There's a time and place for just about any beer out there. If you don't like it, I'm relatively confident nobody cares.
2) Pictures own.
3) Get as nerdy/foodspergy as you want, but try to avoid posting things that would show up on Simply Sara Cooking
4) :420:

related recipes: go nuts. If I may say so, I think it's appropriate given the events of this year.
5) Party punch, mixed drinks, cocktails are cool and good to talk about.
6) :siren:

new for 2016-2017 :siren:

more global discussions about not-munchies/food/cooking thereof are fine here. Keep that poo poo out of N/V and don't be a dick and everything is A-OK

Here are some starter links if you don't want to read the whole loving thread:
BBQ Sauces
BBQ Recs
Appetizers
Quickbreads

I'll be flooding this thing with poo poo I've saved from archive but if I miss something good :justpost:

GonadTheBallbarian fucked around with this message at 17:02 on Aug 26, 2016

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:36

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 07:18

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Chichevache posted:

Stuffed Cheese Buns

I'm partial to a finger food that I can make the day before and then reheat during a commercial break and these cheese buns do the job perfectly. So far I've tried them with mozzarella, New Zealander cheese, Havarti, and my personal favorite, gorgonzola. All of these cheeses work pretty well, but I prefer the gorgonzola because I love the really strong flavor it adds to the bun. When you bite into a gorgonzola bun, you know you bit a gorgonzola bun. When my girlfriend and I prepare these we usually use a variety of cheeses at the same time, so to differentiate between them we add food coloring to the dough of each different variety, in order to identify them more easily.

quote:
1 cup warm water (probably somewhere between 105� and 115�. I just get it hot from the tap. Don't get it too hot or it will kill the yeast.)
2 tablespoons yeast
2 tablespoons sugar
2 teaspoons garlic powder
1/4 cup melted butter
1/4 cup olive oil
3 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons salt

-At least 8 oz. of cheese, the more the merrier (I used chunks of mozzarella for the inside and a mixture of shredded colby and swiss for the top. I was just trying to use up all the forgotten chunks in the hidden corners of the fridge)
-Parmesan cheese
-A few tablespoons of melted butter mixed with a sprinkle of garlic powder and some fresh herbs if you want.

Mix together the yeast and water and let it sit for a couple minutes. Add the sugar, garlic powder, melted butter, and oil. Add the flour a little and a time, mixing in your stand mixer with a dough hook. Add the salt. Knead for 10 minutes, in the stand mixer or by hand. Let the dough rise in a greased bowl (I used the same bowl) covered with a wet cloth for about 30 minutes. Preheat the oven to 375�. Divide the dough into about 20 pieces or so (you can make them as big or small as you want). Put about a 3/4 inch chunk of cheese in each one and make sure you pinch all the edges back up tightly. Put the pinched side down on a greased baking sheet. Sprinkle the buns with more shredded cheese and some parmesan cheese. Bake at 375�F for about 11-15 minutes until the bread is golden brown and the cheese is bubbly. Brush with the melted butter and serve warm.

Read more at http://www.yammiesnoshery.com/2012/...wdgIphKOVhX2.99

Piroshkis

This simple Russian pastry can be stuffed with everything from ground meats to jams. I like to buy a couple of pounds of ground beef or turkey and make a ton of piroshkis in one batch. I will have some then and freeze the rest for later. So far I have only done this with ground turkey and beef, though I do mix up the seasonings I use. I've done everything from Mexican style seasonings with lime juice and Tapatio, to Umami paste, to my personal favorite, a batch using spices such as paprika, coriander, and cumin.

Tomorrow I will be experimenting with a golden raspberry and brie stuffed piroshki. I'm hopeful that it will be interesting, if not good. If you don't hear from me by Tuesday I probably burned my apartment down.

quote:
http://allrecipes.com/recipe/taylors-piroshki/

1 1/2 pounds ground beef

1 onion, finely chopped

1 teaspoon salt

ground black pepper to taste

dried dill weed to taste

1 (.25 ounce) package active dry yeast

1/4 cup warm water

1 cup milk

3 eggs

1/2 cup vegetable oil

2 tablespoons granulated sugar

1 teaspoon salt

4 cups all-purpose flour

3 cups oil for frying

In a medium skillet over medium heat, cook the ground beef until evenly browned; drain. Stir in the onion and cook with the beef until translucent. Sprinkle in salt, pepper and dill weed to taste. Allow to cool before using.
Dissolve the yeast in the 1/4 cup of warm water and place in a warm location until frothy, about 10 to 15 minutes. In a medium saucepan over low heat, warm the milk and gently whisk in the eggs, oil, sugar and salt. Remove from heat.
Place half the flour in a large mixing bowl and gradually stir in the milk mixture. Then add the yeast solution alternately with the remaining flour, stirring after each addition. Mix well. Knead until the dough forms a ball and does not stick to the bowl. (Note: Start with the 4 cups of flour. You may need to add more, a little at a time, as you knead the dough). Cover the bowl with a clean cloth. Set in a warm location and allow to rise until doubled in volume.
Remove dough from bowl and place on a lightly floured surface. Pinch off pieces approximately the size of golf balls. Roll the pieces into disks about 3 1/2 to 4 inches in diameter.
Fill center of each disk with a heaping tablespoon of the cooled meat mixture. Fold disks over the mixture and firmly pinch edges to seal. Arrange on a flat surface and allow to sit approximately 10 minutes.
In an large, heavy skillet or deep fryer, heat the oil to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Deep fry the piroshki in batches until golden brown on one side; gently turn and fry the other side. Remove and let drain on a plate lined with paper towels.

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:39

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

wheez the roux posted:

the Best Fried Chcken You Will Ever Eat You loving Dick
adapated from a recipe by thomas keller because suck my dick none of you deserve to eat this good

first you'll need some chicken. the best way is to buy 2-3 whole chickens (~3-4# each, bigger chickens are grotesque hormone pumped monstrosities that have muscles growing in wrong places and cutting them is a horror show of anatomical miscarriages) and break them down into 10 pieces. if you're too stupid to figure out a 10 piece break then watch this video and learn something you useless swine. if you had to look it up it probably means you don't make your own stock in which case you can either start doing so to make use of the leftover carcass bits + spine or you can be a lazy wasteful worthless rear end in a top hat and buy 5-10lbs of whatever pieces you want ie drumsticks, thighs, breasts. SKIN ON, BONE IN YOU PRICK. if the breasts are Too Huge, you'll have to break them into smaller pieces. there's an ideal surface area-to-volume ratio you want here. too small and your chicken will overcook,too big and it'll be undercooked and loving gross and the breading will burn before the center is warm which means i can;'t teach you anything. jesus christ.

so once you have your chicken you're gonna want to brine it, which accomplishes two goals: it flavors the chicken and it keeps it moist through the cooking process. you can do a lot of things with brine but any good chicken brine will have a few key ingredients: lemon, thyme, parsley, peppercorns, garlic, bay leaves, and a sweetener (honey or sugar). these are classics for chicken in any form for a reason, because people with better palettes than you refined it for centuries. i'll quote keller's recipe for brine here because it's foolproof and excellent. ps if you don't have a digital kitchen scale loving BUY ONE OH MY GOD VOLUMETRIC MEASUREMENT IS FOR ASSHOLES

quote:
Chicken Brine
Makes 2 gallons

5 lemons, halved
24 bay leaves
1 bunch (4 ounces) flat-leaf parsley
1 bunch (1 ounce) thyme
1/2 cup clover honey
1 head garlic, halved through the equator
3/4 cup black peppercorns
2 cups (10 ounces) kosher salt, preferably Diamond Crystal
2 gallons water

The key ingredient here is the lemon, which goes wonderfully with chicken, as do the herbs: bay leaf, parsley, and thyme. This amount of brine will be enough for 10 pounds.

Combine all the ingredients in a large pot, cover, and bring to a boil. Boil for 1 minute, stirring to dissolve the salt. Remove from the heat and cool completely, then chill before using. The brine can be refrigerated for up to 3 days.

you can vary this. i add more lemon and garlic. do what you want i don't care but probably try it as written before screwing around with it and ruining it like an idiot. make the brine and wait until it is COMPLETELY CHILLED or you'll be breaking about a billion rules of poultry safety and poison your friends and be That Guy when they're all sick. don't be That Guy. do it in advance a day if you don't have a huge amount of time to wait for chilling (i'm talking like 6 hours). if you don't have a big enough pot for 2 gallons you can do it with 1 gallon of water, and then when you get to the chilling step add the other gallon of water in a larger vessel ( a sanitized home depot bucket for $5 owns because it's big enough to brine a turkey in for thanksgiving) and the dilution will also cool it rapidly.

once your brine is loving chilled then pour it over all your chicken. i use huge ziploc plastic tubs and organize by cut (ie drumsticks, thighs, breasts) for organizational purposes but if you go the bucket route then just put all your chicken in, cover it, and put in the fridge covered. ziploc bags work well too but you'll probably spill all over everything and contaminate everything with raw poultry you god drat idiot. use tupperware/tubs/whatever. time this so that you're doing it as close to 12 hours before you want to be serving your chicken as possible. as much as 16 hours is okay if not ideal, by 24 your chicken will be p drat salty, under 10 and the flavor will be weak.

~90 minutes before you want to serve, pull chicken from the fridge and dump the brine, rinse off the chicken with cold water and get it good and clean. then pat it all dry and keep it separated by parts and set aside covered with a tea towel or w/e to let it come up to room temperature. now is a good time to prepare your cook station. you'll be making a flour coating and using buttermilk for a double coating. flour->buttermilk->flour->fryer->cooling rack will be your workflow here. again from keller:

quote:
Ingredients
(Serves 4-6)

Two 2 1/2- to 3-pound chickens (see Note on Chicken Size)
Chicken Brine (recipe follows), cold

For Dredging and Frying
Peanut or canola oil for deep-frying [ed. note: i use vegetable oil, idgaf. just know your smoke points]
1 quart buttermilk
Kosher salt and freshly ground black pepper

Coating
6 cups all-purpose flour
1/4 cup garlic powder
1/4 cup onion powder
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon paprika
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon cayenne
1 tablespoon plus 1 teaspoon kosher salt
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
Ground fleur de sel or fine sea salt

Directions

Cut each chicken into 10 pieces: 2 legs, 2 thighs, 4 breast quarters, and 2 wings. Pour the brine into a container large enough to hold the chicken pieces, add in the chicken, and refrigerate for 12 hours (no longer, or the chicken may become too salty).

Remove the chicken from the brine (discard the brine) and rinse under cold water, removing any herbs or spices sticking to the skin. Pat dry with paper towels, or let air-dry. Let rest at room temperature for 1-1/2 hours, or until it comes to room temperature.

If you have two large pots (about 6 inches deep) and a lot of oil, you can cook the dark and white meat at the same time; if not, cook the dark meat first, then turn up the heat and cook the white meat. No matter what size pot you have, the oil should not come more than one-third of the way up the sides of the pot. Fill the pot with at least 2 inches of peanut oil and heat to 320�F. [ed. note: USE A THERMOMETER IN YOUR OIL ] Set a cooling rack over a baking sheet. Line a second baking sheet with parchment paper.

Meanwhile, combine all the coating ingredients in a large bowl. Transfer half the coating to a second large bowl. Pour the buttermilk into a third bowl and season with salt and pepper. Set up a dipping station: the chicken pieces, one bowl of coating, the bowl of buttermilk, the second bowl of coating, and the parchment-lined baking sheet.

Just before frying, dip the chicken thighs into the first bowl of coating, turning to coat and patting off the excess; dip them into the buttermilk, allowing the excess to run back into the bowl; then dip them into the second bowl of coating. Transfer to the parchment-lined pan.

Carefully lower the thighs into the hot oil. Adjust the heat as necessary to return the oil to the proper temperature. Fry for 2 minutes, then carefully move the chicken pieces around in the oil and continue to fry, monitoring the oil temperature and turning the pieces as necessary for even cooking, for 11 to 12 minutes, until the chicken is a deep golden brown, cooked through, and very crisp. Meanwhile, coat the chicken drumsticks and transfer to the parchment-lined baking sheet.

Transfer the cooked thighs to the cooling rack skin-side-up and let rest while you fry the remaining chicken. (Putting the pieces skin-side-up will allow excess fat to drain, whereas leaving them skin-side-down could trap some of the fat.) Make sure that the oil is at the correct temperature, and cook the chicken drumsticks. When the drumsticks are done, lean them meat-side-up against the thighs to drain, then sprinkle the chicken with fine sea salt.

Turn up the heat and heat the oil to 340�F. Meanwhile, coat the chicken breasts and wings. Carefully lower the chicken breasts into the hot oil and fry for 7 minutes, or until golden brown, cooked through, and crisp. Transfer to the rack, sprinkle with salt, and turn skin side up. Cook the wings for 6 minutes, or until golden brown and cooked through. Transfer the wings to the rack and turn off the heat. Arrange the chicken on a serving platter.

Note: We let the chicken rest for 7 to 10 minutes after it comes out of the fryer so that it has a chance to cool down. If the chicken has rested for longer than 10 minutes, put the tray of chicken in a 400�F oven for a minute or two to ensure that the crust is crisp and the chicken is hot. [ed. note: you can keep racks of chicken in the oven at 200�F for 15-30m without a problem to hold batches while you do the 2nd/3rd]

i've made this a million times so if you have any questions just ask and contemplate how you failed your poor mother to not be able to follow a simple god damned recipe. you can adjust the coating quite a bit obviously, i use extra paprika (piment�n picante) and some other peppers besides cayenne (ancho, de arbol) but it can be whatever you want once you know how the baseline recipe works. anyway here's some pictures from various times i made it

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:41

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

wheez the roux posted:

i just hosted a dinner with that as the main course + home fries, then miniature apple pie cookies with cinnamon ice cream and it all turned out awesome. i didn't get any pictures of the cookies because we ate them all immediately but they turned out basically identical to the photos from the recipe here: http://smittenkitchen.com/blog/2011...le-pie-cookies/ protip - scale the amount of dough up significantly to make a decent amount of these. like, for 10 people, at least double it and don't even bother trying to make cookies smaller than 3" because if you know how working with pie dough is you will want to hate you self in short order. other protip is do almost all of your dough working (flattening, cutting, etc) on parchment paper. cut circles, peel out the extra dough, fold parchment paper over to cover, and place dough rounds in freezer as you cut bach by batch so that 1. they stay easy to work with and 2. you can assemble your cookies on the parchment paper and put it directly in the over on a baking sheet and not need to worry about clean up or sticking. if you don't have a good base in baking skills i would steer clear of this recipe because it pretty much requires you to know a billion of the little things about working with doughs that you only get through hands on experience.

the ice cream recipe i used in my cuisinart is this one here and it turned out amazing: http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/...amon-ice-cream/

it's a super simple recipe so quality of ingredients is paramount here. spring for the good cinnamon at your local spice shop (vietnamese is ideal. yes, i'm aware, it's cassia and not true cinnamon, but for the purposes of this recipe vietnamese cinnamon has the best flavor profile imo.) also buy high quality vanilla beans (madagascar or mexico, doesn't really matter). don't use extract, that shitis nasty and besides even in AK you can get a 3-pack of excellent quality beans for $7 and you only use one bean to make a half gallon of ice cream so don't be a loving pennypincher

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:41

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Blitz7x posted:

Franks Red hot buffalo chicken dip

Stolen directly from the website, but it's fantastic and a hit at every party. Suuuper easy

Low carb for all my keto bros

INGREDIENTS:
1 (8 oz.)pkg. PHILADELPHIA Cream Cheese, softened
1/2 cup FRANK'S RedHot Original Cayenne Pepper Sauce or FRANK'S RedHot Buffalo Wings Sauce
1/2 cup Bleu cheese or ranch dressing
2 cups Shredded cooked chicken.
1/2 cup Crumbled bleu cheese or your favorite shredded cheese

DIRECTIONS:
PREHEAT oven to 350�F.
COMBINE all ingredients in a 1-quart baking dish.
BAKE 20 min. or until mixture is heated through; stir. Serve with crackers and/or vegetables.tortilla chips or whatever you want

http://www.franksredhot.com/recipes...cken-dip-RE1242

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:42

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Thaddius the Large posted:

Well drat, after Wheez�s show this seems a bit more paltry, but a few recipes have served me well:

Cajun Potato Salad, adopted from Chef Paul Prudhomme

-1 tbs salt
-1 tsp paprika
-1/2 tsp cayenne
-1/2 tsp onion powder
-1/2 tsp garlic powder
-1/2 tsp ground black pepper
-1/2 tsp dried thyme
-1/2 tsp dried oregano
-1/2 tsp rubbed sage
-1/4 tsp cumin
-Green onion salad dressing (recipe follows)
-4 medium white potatoes, cooked, peeled, and diced into � inch cubes
-6 hard boiled eggs, peeled and finely chopped
-1/2 C diced onion
-1/2 C diced green bell pepper
-1/2 C diced celery

Mix all ingredients together, this is not rocket science.

The Green Onion Salad Dressing is basically mayo with a bit more stuff, so you can mix it as such if you�re lazy, but homemade is really simple and tastes better.

-2 eggs
-2 egg yolks
-2 � C vegetable oil
-1 C green onions, diced
-2 � tbs brown mustard
-2 tbs cane vinegar
-2 tsp seasoning salt

Whip egg and yolks in a food processor until frothy. Add oil in a slow stream, until combined into a mayo-like consistency. Add remaining ingredients and process.

Thai Mango Soup

-2 tsp olive oil
-1 onion, diced
-2 tsp Thai red curry paste
-2 large mangoes, peeled and quartered
-1 tbsp light brown sugar
-2 tsp grated ginger
-� tsp salt
-1 can unsweetened coconut milk
-1� cups water
-� cup plain yogurt
-2 tbsp freshly squeezed lime juice

Mango Relish:

-1 large mango, diced
-2 tbsp light brown sugar
-2 tbsp chopped fresh basil

In a skillet, heat oil over medium heat. Add onion and saut� until
softened, about 6 minutes. Add curry paste and saut� for 1 minute.

In a food processor or blender, pure� onion mixture, mangos, brown
sugar, ginger and salt until smooth. Add coconut milk, water, yogurt
and lime juice; process to combine. Transfer to a bowl, cover and
refrigerate until cold, about 3 hours, or overnight. Taste and adjust
seasoning with salt, if necessary.

Prepare the relish: In a small bowl, combine mango, brown sugar and
basil. Let stand for 15 minutes.

Ladle soup into chilled bowls and top each with a dollop of mango relish.

Chili

I�ve posted this in multiple iterations of this thread, because gently caress you it�s good.

-2 tablespoons olive oil
-3 pounds sirloin steak, cut into 1-inch cubes
-12 ounces chorizo sausage, casing removed, cut into 1/2 cubes
-1 large yellow onion, coarsely chopped
-1/4 cup chili powder
-1 tablespoon garlic salt
-2 teaspoons cumin
-1 teaspoon dried basil
-2 (14.5 oz) cans beef broth
-2 (14.5 oz) cans whole tomatoes, drained
-1 (12 oz) can beer (your choice here, doesn't have a huge impact what you use, just make sure it's not too lovely)
-1 cup cilantro, chopped
-1 cinnamon stick
-3 bay leaves
-2-4 green jalapenos, slit lengthwise 3 times each (alternately, 1 habanero and 1 jalapeno)
-1 tablespoon yellow cornmeal
-Salt and pepper, to taste

Place oil in a large, heavy pot over medium heat. Brown the sirloin in
batches. Remove to a bowl with a slotted spoon.

Add chorizo and onions to the pot and brown. Make sure to break up the meat.

Return sirloin to the pot and stir in remaining ingredients, except for garnishes.

Bring to a boil, reduce heat, simmer for 3-5 hours (longer is better). Stir occasionally, breaking up tomatoes.

Before serving, discard cinnamon stick and bay leaves (and habanero if you didn't dice them, unless you like playing the �who�s accidentally gonna bite that poo poo� lottery, which is always hilarious after a few beers). Garnish with cheese and sour cream, if desired.

Some notes:
You can tailor the meat to your budget. I always get nice sirloins cut up at my butcher, but any old stew meat will work (round, etc). I prefer spicy pork chorizo (again, my butcher makes it) because the chicken stuff doesn't taste right to me.

You can tailor the recipe to your level. You can make your own chili powder for instance. Or make your own beef stock.

I usually make it with a brown ale, something Newcastle-y. Up to your tastes. I wouldn't use a stout personally, but a porter might be interesting.

This is a very mild recipe. I usually use 2 habaneros (seeded, diced) and 3-4 jalapenos (sliced). I like my chili hot.

Never add beans to chili, unless you're a goddamn pinko commie.

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:43

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Mardragon posted:

This is a pretzel recipie I use all the time. I get asked to bring them to almost every event. Go well with cheese (Dubliner is my favorite) or almost anything
quote:
Ingrediants for 1 batch:
4 cups flour
2 table spoons or one packet yeast
1/3 cup brown sugar
1 2/3 cup warm water
coarse salt
5-6 table spoons baking soda

Preheat the over to 365-375 depending on the overn and how evenly it cooks
Boil a pot of hot water while adding the baking soda to make a baking soda bath
Line a cooking pan or two with crisco or use some non-stick tinfoil (Crisco tastes better)

- Mix brown sugar with warm water and add yeast, let it sit for 3-4 minutes
- Pour 4 cups of flour into food processor, add the mixture and let it mix for 20 revolutions
- After twenty revolutions you should have a ball of dough that has the consistency of play-do, depending on the flour it may be too soft and you'll need to add pinches of flour to get the right consistency, if the dough is ready before 20 revolutions the ball will be heavy enough to stop the food processer
- Knead the dough a bit to make sure it all has the same consistency
- Cut dough into smaller portions, usually you can make 12 large sized pretzels or 16 good sized ones
- Roll each piece out and fold into pretzel shape
- Add each pretzel into the baking soda bath for 30 seconds each
- Remove pretzels and place on crisco sheet sprinkle salt, a little salt goes a long way but it's personal preference
- Place sheet in the oven for 7-10 min until pretzels are a golden brown
- remove and serve with cautionary tales about hotness

I've done some other versions as well:
1) Replace one cup of flour with wheat flour and add honey during the food processor part to make honey wheat pretzels
2) Use a cheese whiz/steak/onions mixture and fold the dough like a hotpocket for cheese steak pretzels
3) Add garlic salt for garlic pretzels
4) Don't put salt on them and when they get out of the oven bathe the pretzels in butter and put them in a cinnamon and sugar mix

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:44

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Easy As gently caress And Delicious Beer Bread :siren:

http://goonswithspoons.com/Beer_Bread

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:45

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Iron Clad Lou posted:

Meatballs a'la Foodball Farthouse

Based on Alton Brown's baked meatballs (video)

-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-

Ingredients

2 lbs ground bort (85%)
5 ounces chopped frozen spinach, thawed and drained thoroughly
1/2 cup grated Parmesan
1 whole egg
1 teaspoon dried basil
1 teaspoon dried parsley
2 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes
1 heaping squirt of Frank's Red Hot Buffalo Sauce, to taste
1/2 cup bread crumbs, divided

Directions

Preheat the oven to 400 degrees F.

In a large mixing bort, combine the ground round, spinach, cheese, egg, basil, parsley, garlic powder, salt, red pepper flakes, Frank's, and 1/4 cup of the bread crumbs.

Using your hands, mix all ingredients until well incorporated. Use immediately or ideally let it refrigerate for a few hours.

Place the remaining bread crumbs into a small bowl. Using your hands, shape the meatballs into rounds, roll in the bread crumbs and place the meatballs in individual, miniature muffin tin cups.

Using a muffin pan is the crucial step to make these crispy and delicious. Bake until golden and cooked.

My favorite method of eating these is hoagie-style, but they are freakin delicious and usually get eaten plain as soon as they're taken out of the oven. Bort appetite!

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:49

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Click here for a meat smoking thread -- Something Offal :siren:

# ? Jan 24, 2016 20:54

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Easy GWS Recipes :siren:

# ? Jan 24, 2016 21:00

sweet thursday: Sep 16, 2012

I wish I was passionate about cooking. Or anything.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 07:34

hifi: Jul 25, 2012

i made bean dip with a can of refried beans and hot sauce

# ? Jan 25, 2016 07:37

Metapod: Mar 18, 2012

sweet thursday posted:

I wish I was passionate about cooking. Or anything.

Be the change that you want to be

# ? Jan 25, 2016 07:39

Mrit: Sep 26, 2007; by exmarx; Grimey Drawer

I saw this thread and immediately thought of Wheez.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 07:41

its all nice on rice: Nov 12, 2006; Sweet, Salty Goodness.; Buglord

Mix it up: make baked mac n cheese; serve up a lemon meringue pie; steam broccoli and various other veggies.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 08:00

BlindSite: Feb 8, 2009

If you suck at cooking or are lazy and you wanna look like a pro motherfucker heres 2 easy recipes.

Buy
1 jar hot salsa
1 jar medium salsa
1 tin refried beans
1 bag of mixed cheese (usually cheddar, mozarella and parmesean)
2 bags of corn/tortilla chips

Combine in a bowl, spread onto a baking tray lined with baking paper.

Cover with cheese, bake in oven for about 15 mins on 180 degrees celcius

Eat with corn chips. Looks like you made a dip from scratch tastes mexicany, people love it.

Number 2.
Buy:
French stick
Jar pre made pizza sauce
Aforementioned mixed cheese
Pepperoni and a bell pepper and a red onion

Cut up onion and capsicum into small bits
Cut a channel about an inch wide the length of the bread stick

Spread cheese the length of the channel
Spread sauce the length of the channel use a little more than you think you need
Spread cheese on top of the sauce
Stuff other toppings on top

Bake in oven for 15 to 20 mins at 175 degrees celcius
Serve with a bread knife to cut bits

Both take about 5 minutes to make and everyone ive made them for has lost their poo poo over how good it tastes.

Minimal effort, maximum awesome.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 08:41

Blowjob Overtime: Apr 6, 2008; Steeeeriiiiiiiiike twooooooo!

Mrit posted:

I saw this thread and immediately thought of Wheez.

Ditto. Clicked to make sure the fried chicken recipe made it. Also because food and cooking are awesome.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 14:36

George H.W. Cunt: Oct 6, 2010

wanna make that fried chicken so bad

# ? Jan 25, 2016 16:18

Slowpoke!: Feb 12, 2008; ANIME IS FOR ADULTS

Thread is lacking in Carolina-style BBQ pulled pork. Get some sweet cole slaw and make some BBQ sandwiches. This is all you need for game day.

I'm sure Denver's traditional tailgating food of choice is mineral water, carrots and celery with fat-free ranch.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 16:33

seiferguy: Jun 9, 2005; FLAWED
INTUITION; Toilet Rascal

My girlfriend got me the Thug Kitchen cookbook for Christmas, and so far I've cooked several things from it, and they all own. I'm probably gonna try their Badass Bean Dip this year: http://www.thugkitchen.com/badass_bean_dip

All their meals are vegan friendly, in case you got a friend / family member that's into that.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 16:46

Elephanthead: Sep 11, 2008; Toilet Rascal

Pfft, I will be dipping papa johns into some oinkos cammy cam flavor.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 16:59

Gyro Zeppeli: Jul 19, 2012; sure hope no-one throws me off a bridge

WugLyfe posted:

Easy As gently caress And Delicious Beer Bread

http://goonswithspoons.com/Beer_Bread

Gonna make the beer bread and some jalapeno chutney with it.

Gonna get the hotpoops, gonna be rad.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 17:08

its all nice on rice: Nov 12, 2006; Sweet, Salty Goodness.; Buglord

Slowpoke! posted:

I'm sure Denver's traditional tailgating food of choice is mineral water, carrots and celery with fat-free ranch.

Is Denver a landlocked Seattle?

# ? Jan 25, 2016 17:17

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Mrit posted:

I saw this thread and immediately thought of Wheez.

Yeah, I caught myself thinking to look for this thread to see if he's posted it since I stopped a couple years ago and immediately felt like poo poo.

When I get home I think I'll post some of my wheez-friendly recipes

# ? Jan 25, 2016 17:23

Yodzilla: Apr 29, 2005; Now who looks even dumber?

Beef Witch

This is a good thread and thanks for linking me to the meat smoking one as well. Maybe I'll do ribs again for the Superbowl.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 17:28

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Hijo Del Helmsley posted:

Gonna make the beer bread and some jalapeno chutney with it.

Gonna get the hotpoops, gonna be rad.

You know what works real well with a dank loaf? Hollow that poo poo out, and fill it with a beer dip of some sort and use the bread you took out as poo poo to scoop it out.

owns

# ? Jan 25, 2016 17:41

GonadTheBallbarian: Jul 23, 2007

Slowpoke! posted:

Thread is lacking in Carolina-style BBQ pulled pork. Get some sweet cole slaw and make some BBQ sandwiches. This is all you need for game day.

I'm sure Denver's traditional tailgating food of choice is mineral water, carrots and celery with fat-free ranch.

Carolina BBQ owns.

If you've got recipes :justpost:

# ? Jan 25, 2016 17:46

Blitz of 404 Error: Sep 19, 2007; Joe Biden is a top 15 president

Slowpoke! posted:

Thread is lacking in Carolina-style BBQ pulled pork. Get some sweet cole slaw and make some BBQ sandwiches. This is all you need for game day.

I'm sure Denver's traditional tailgating food of choice is mineral water, carrots and celery with fat-free ranch.

As a NC transplant to Texas it's hard as hell to imitate eastern north Carolina vinegar based bbq here. I've had different sauces shipped in but can't quite get it right. My quick and easy fix is to put a pork shoulder in the crock pot for 8ish hours in half vinegar and half apple coder vinegar and it sort of tastes like home?

All BBQ in Texas is brisket which is good but not pulled pork

# ? Jan 25, 2016 17:47

Blowjob Overtime: Apr 6, 2008; Steeeeriiiiiiiiike twooooooo!

WugLyfe posted:

Carolina BBQ owns.

If you've got recipes

There is a recipe in Michael Ruhlman's 20 Techniques book. I'll post it when I get home (with a proper link to the book, because it is great and everyone should buy it).

# ? Jan 25, 2016 18:19

computer parts: Nov 18, 2010; PLEASE CLAP

Blitz7x posted:

All BBQ in Texas is brisket which is good but not pulled pork

There's some pulled pork but we reserve it a lot for carnitas meat

# ? Jan 25, 2016 18:24

Thaddius the Large: Jul 5, 2006; It's in the five-hole!

I go to amazingribs.com for my smoking/bbq needs, and he's got a couple Carolina sauces I adore; the mustard sauce is definitely more easy on the taste buds, in case the vinegar sauce is too strong for milder palates, but I think they're both fantastic. Cook the meat (probably pulled pork) as you will, that's a whole thread topic in and of itself, but I usually smoke it with the Magic Dust rub layered on thick and then add sauce once serving, just adjust based on your equipment/meal plan/whatever.

Carolina Mopping Sauce
1 1/2 cups distilled vinegar
1 tsp hot sauce
2 tbs brown sugar
1 tbs salt
2 tsp crushed red pepper
2 tsp ground black pepper

Shake all together in a jar, refrigerate at least 12 hours to let flavored meld, and warm before serving. Easy and delicious, but very strong flavor, so don't just ladle it on without tasting first.

Columbia Gold Mustard Sauce
2 cups prepared yellow mustard
2/3 cups cider vinegar
3 tbs tomato paste
1/2 tsp hot sauce
3/4 cups sugar
2 tsp chicken bouillon
2 tsp dried rosemary leaves
1 tsp celery seed
1 tbs mustard powder
2 tsp onion powder
2 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp salt
1 tsp black pepper

Mix all wet ingredients in a bowl. Grind rosemary and celery seed in a grinder or with mortar and pestle, and add with rest of dry ingredients to the wet. Mix thoroughly and refrigerate at least an hour.

Magic Dust Meat Rub
3/4 cup dark brown sugar
3/4 cup white sugar
1/2 cup paprika
1/4 cup garlic powder
2 tbs ground black pepper
2 tbs ground ginger
2 tbs onion powder
2 tsp rosemary powder

Mix all and layer on thick before serving. This will make lots of extra unless your serving like 100 people, so save the rest in an airtight container.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 18:39

Filthy Casual: Aug 13, 2014

I typically make this every Super Bowl, pretty simple as far as items go:

Bacon Wrapped Bratwurst Bites

Ingredients:
-10 Bratwurst links
-2 packs of bacon
-1 large white onion
-Toothpicks, preferably ones with festive colors

Step 1, Prepare the Brats:
-Slice onion thick, quarter the outer rings, half the inner rings.
-Wipe away tears
-Place Brats in a pan with water, I usually go 5 at a time, but if you have a giant pan 10 works too.
-Rotate onion slices in and out of the pan, just enough to get a stock going, but let them retain a small degree of firmness
-Boil Brats for ~20 minutes on medium heat
-Remove Brats from heat source, slice each link by 5 (4 if you got some choad brats)

Step 2, Enter the Bacon:
-Third each bacon slice
-Wrap around corresponding piece of brat
-Complete binding ritual with onion on top and toothpick

Step 3, Grease is the Word
-Cook up 2-3 slices of bacon in a small pan, to properly grease it, eat that bacon
-Add between 7-10 of the wrapped bites to the pan, turning until bacon is appropriately crispy
-Repeat action until all bites are cooked
-Those with weak arteries may want to let excess grease drain on a sheet with paper towel before serving
-Serve with any of the previously mentioned sauces ITT.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 19:25

Gyro Zeppeli: Jul 19, 2012; sure hope no-one throws me off a bridge

Buffalo Chicken Wings

The best loving wings ever. For real.

Ingredients:

-150ml preferred hot sauce (I recommend Frank's Red Hot)
-100g unsalted butter
-1 1/2 tablespoons white vinegar
-1/4 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
-1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
-pinch of garlic powder
-pinch of salt
-12 chicken wings
-Oil for deep-frying
-100g all-purpose flour

Combine hot sauce, butter, vinegar, Worcestershire sauce, cayenne pepper, garlic powder and salt in a pot. Bring to a simmer while stirring. Once it starts bubbling at the sides of the pot, take it off the heat and stir vigorously.

Heat oil in deep fryer to 190C (375F). Dredge wings in flour until evenly coated. Fry wings until golden brown (10-15 minutes). Remove from fryer, coat in sauce.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 19:37

Filthy Casual: Aug 13, 2014

Is it safe to double or triple sauce amounts for more wings, or do proportions skew a bit?

# ? Jan 25, 2016 20:20

Gyro Zeppeli: Jul 19, 2012; sure hope no-one throws me off a bridge

Just up the proportions if you wanna double or triple up.

Except maybe not the cayenne pepper (which is the main variable if you want it hotter or milder.)

# ? Jan 25, 2016 20:27

Blowjob Overtime: Apr 6, 2008; Steeeeriiiiiiiiike twooooooo!

Alternate wing prep method if you don't like frying things:

Put wings in a colander or other makeshift steamer basket (or real steamer basket if you have one). Put 1 inch or so of water into a pan that is large enough to hold your makeshift basket and bring it to a boil. Reduce heat so that it's still boiling, but not on full blast. Put the wing basket in there, cover, steam for 10 minutes, then remove and dry. Let the wings cool (put them outside or in the fridge), then put them on a cookie sheet (with drying rack on it if you want oil to drip away) and into a 425F oven for 40 minutes, turning the wings halfway through (turn the actual wings, not rotate the cookie sheet).

Throw the sauce and wings into a big bowl and just toss them around to coat.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 20:30

Thaddius the Large: Jul 5, 2006; It's in the five-hole!

Aside from my yearly chili, decided to go with Baked Korean Chicken Wings this year. Made them once before and the sauce turned out pretty rad, especially good for those of us not wanting to fry their wings (I actually have a fryer, but hate cleanup and dealing with the oil and whatnot), and it's real easy to boot.

Baked Korean Wings

--Wings--
4 lbs wings and drumsticks
2 tbsp tamari soy sauce
2 tbsp sesame oil
1 tbsp grated garlic
1 tbsp grated ginger
Salt and pepper

--Sauce--
1/2 cup gochujang
6 tbsp cider vinegar
3 tbsp honey
2 tbsp sesame oil

Mix chicken ingredients and refrigerate for 4 hours. Preheat oven to 500, and spray foil-lined baking sheets with non-stick spray. Bake wings for 20 minutes, before finishing under the broiler for another 10 minutes, turning halfway through. While wings are cooking, whisk sauce ingredients together, then drizzle over wings in a mixing bowl and toss to coat.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 20:31

the good fax machine: Feb 26, 2007; by Nyc_Tattoo

Slow Cooker Queso

This is my favorite queso recipe. For this and the next recipe I use canned fire-roasted tomatoes because they're hardly ever in season (certainly not this time of year) and it saves a little time. Feel free to substitute fresh ones if you grow your own or whatever.

Ingredientes:

-1 lb ground beef
-1 can ( 14 oz) diced tomatoes (fire roasted are best)
-1 or 2 jalapenos, diced
-6 oz greek yogurt
-10 oz sharp cheddar (get a block and shred it yourself for best results)
-8 oz cream cheese, divided into ~1oz blocks
-Diced green onions if you so desire

Season that burger with salt and pepper, and brown it. Drain and add to crockpot. Add everything else but cream cheese and optional green onions, mix well. Drop cream cheese hunks on top and cook on low 1.5 - 2 hours until heated all the way through. Add green onion if you swing that way and stir until smooth.

Restaurant-style Salsa

I usually pre-dice all of the vegetables because I prefer a smoother salsa, but if you like it chunky you might want to just cut into larger pieces as it's going into the blender anyway. Also, whether or not the canned ingredients are drained come down to personal preference, I used to drain them but I've found that I actually like the salsa better with a little more liquid.

Ingredientes:

-28 oz fire roasted diced tomatoes
-4 oz diced green chiles
-2 or 3 jalapenos, seeded for mild or you can leave some in for medium to hot. One peppers worth of seeds is usually plenty spicy for most people
-1 white onion
-1 bunch cilantro, remove as much of the stems as you can without spending too much time
-3 cloves garlic
-1 tsp cumin
-1 tsp sugar
-1 tsp salt
-1/4 tsp black pepper

Combine all ingredients into blender and pulse until you reach desired consistency. I usually pulse about 5 times and manually stir because the blender only wants to really blend the stuff at the bottom, and repeat until it's where I want it.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 21:10

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 07:18

Ghost of Reagan Past: Oct 7, 2003; rock and roll fun

Char Siu
2 lbs pork. Choose a cut like tenderloin, country-style ribs, baby-back ribs, or spare ribs. Belly and shoulder can also be used.
5 cloves minced garlic
2" minced ginger (this is not necessarily traditional, but i throw it in)
2 tablespoons shaoxing wine
1 tablespoon dark soy sauce
1 tablespoon light soy sauce (note: this is not interchangeable with low sodium or "light" Japanese soy sauces)
2 tablespoons hoisin sauce
3 tablespoons honey
8 tablespoons sugar
2 teaspoons five spice powder (you can grind your own: star anise, cinnamon, cloves, Sichuan pepper, and fennel seeds)

Optional: add chili garlic paste, or sub in corn syrup or maltose for the honey. But I like the honey a lot. This is a pretty standard recipe that you can adjust to your taste.

Mix all the sauce ingredients, and toss with the pork. Let marinate overnight, probably in a plastic bag. You should have a lot of marinade; you'll be using it tomorrow.

Heat your oven to 350F. In a foil-lined pan, place some metal racks. You can use a roasting pan if you don't have those little racks. Put the meat on top of that, and bake for 15 minutes. At 15 minutes, remove the meat, turn, and brush with some of the leftover marinade. Return to the oven for 15 minutes. Remove and brush again, this time turning the heat to 400F. Return to the oven for 15 minutes. Slice and serve. I like serving it on plain white rice and chopped scallions.

You can also use a similar sauce for wings.

# ? Jan 25, 2016 22:28

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > The Football Funhouse > The Superbowl Party Food Thread: Eat Your Sorrows

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