NHL Offseason N/V April - When the Balls Come Out, Nothing's Going to Change

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > NHL Offseason N/V April - When the Balls Come Out, Nothing's Going to Change

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Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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I can't wait to see what happens when Philly, Boston, and Detroit all manage to gently caress this up somehow

# ¿ Apr 1, 2016 15:17

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 00:50

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Aphrodite posted:

Boston and Detroit are in the same division, one of them has to go. Ottawa is next and they're already eliminated.

see you'd think that

# ¿ Apr 1, 2016 15:40

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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xzzy posted:

Except there's not actually a pattern anywhere in that sequence. Other than no team in that list has won consecutive cups, which means Chicago is hosed.

Bruins this year and Blackhawks in 2017 would be a palindromic pattern

# ¿ Apr 1, 2016 17:19

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

DJExile posted:

E: Oh here we go

Return waivers are still the dumbest loving thing.

Aphrodite posted:

I would like the Red Wings to win the lottery and get Matthews.

this is legit going to happen and it's going to be tremendous and it's going to be amazing watching him and larkin will them to a bunch of 6-5 wins when their defense is still a heaping pile of fresh steaming dogshit

# ¿ Apr 3, 2016 05:27

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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bewbies posted:

Hasek's line in 93-94: 1.95/.930

Vicas posted:

League average save percentage 93-94: .895

if you don't think that hasek is the GOAT you are a silly boob

triple sulk posted:

Red Wings' last three: Philadelphia, @Boston, @NYR

# ¿ Apr 4, 2016 06:54

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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Jamwad Hilder posted:

1. Bruins are going to miss the playoffs.

lol wings are going to lose out i have no idea what you're talking about

# ¿ Apr 4, 2016 17:56

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

MononcQc posted:

https://twitter.com/ArponBasu/status/717446435319504896

Didn't remember it being that bad

The Red wings had 19 wins in their first 39 games and 19 wins in their last 38 games; they went from "worse than Montreal" to "not good enough to beat Montreal"

# ¿ Apr 5, 2016 21:47

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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Trevor Bird posted:

http://www.ontheforecheck.com/2016/4/5/11366822/nashville-predators-vs-colorado-avalanche-the-shame-spiral

almost a playoff team!

Just think about how bad they would be without the expert guidance of Jack Adams Winner Patrick Roy

# ¿ Apr 5, 2016 21:51

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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Jamwad Hilder posted:

I disagree with this because while both Detroit and Boston are Not Very Good Right Now, the playoff spot they're battling for is most likely 3rd in the Atlantic, not a wild card.Tampa Bay is good, but with all their injuries they're a very beatable team right now. Panthers and Islanders are probably going to be the other two teams in that section of the bracket, and they are also not particularly scary. It's not that implausible for Boston or Detroit to go all the way to the ECF, because of how trash the Atlantic is.

it's actually very implausible because they are both trash teams that will get beaten handily in a 7 game series by the syracuse crunch let alone the tampa bay lightning

# ¿ Apr 6, 2016 18:16

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

the conference finals are going to be kings/hawks and pens/someone who will lose to the pens, just strap in now guys there's no point in fighting it

Jamwad Hilder posted:

well, maybe for Detroit, but for whatever reason Boston almost always beats the Lightning. It's one of those weird situations where one team seems to have the other's number. There was a streak where the Bruins literally did not lose to Tampa for three years, and this isn't when Tampa was bad, this was between like 2012-2015. I'd feel pretty confident about a Boston-Tampa match up as a B's fan, especially with all of Tampa's injuries.

Well, with a playoff spot on the line, the Wings in the last three weeks have lost games to both, what essentially amounted to, St. John's and the Marlies; so excuse me if I don't think that they'd have a shot to beat Tampa if the entire team were playing blindfolded with the wrong-handed stick

Teemu Pokemon fucked around with this message at 19:54 on Apr 6, 2016

# ¿ Apr 6, 2016 19:51

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

lol like you think the wings wouldn't lose to the flyers in a shootout again

# ¿ Apr 6, 2016 19:57

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

triple sulk posted:

Stone Cold Steve Mason

I know the Flyers have been dogshit in the shootout pretty much since it's inception, but for most of that time (especially the last 4 years), the Wings have been right down there with them.

If they manage to lose to the Flyers in a shootout twice in one year, they should just forfeit all of their shooutouts for the rest of time.

# ¿ Apr 6, 2016 20:00

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Just got home form work and :stare:

whatis posted:

lol if you didn't already know this

seriously islanders fans are The Worst

# ¿ Apr 7, 2016 03:52

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

this stupid streak might continue!!!! red wings fans will get to enjoy another abbreviated playoff series and another year of mediocrity marketed as contending!!!

# ¿ Apr 7, 2016 03:55

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Reverend Sub-Zero posted:

gently caress Detroit, that poo poo hole.

i wonder if it's worse to live in detroit or be from philadelphia

# ¿ Apr 7, 2016 03:57

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

there's still two more opportunities for the Wings to poo poo this away, let's not get all doom and gloom just yet

triple sulk posted:

Center City Philadelphia is extremely nice, as well as several other neighborhoods.

yeah no that's definitely not what i meant. i bet germany was really pretty in the 30s

# ¿ Apr 7, 2016 04:11

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

very philadelphia of you to blame it all on places near camden

# ¿ Apr 7, 2016 04:15

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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lol the red wings are terrible and all of the boston and philly handwringing will be hilarious when they lose their last two and get passed

# ¿ Apr 8, 2016 01:11

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Aphrodite posted:

Detroit doesn't have to win to stay ahead of Boston.

They don't, but they do. When Boston and Philly get at least 1 and 2 more points respectively, they will knock the Wings out because there's no way they are going to beat the Rangers, let alone do it in regulation.

# ¿ Apr 8, 2016 03:01

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

DJExile posted:

Philly has to basically win out against Pittsburgh and the Isles. Not happening.

If they win one, or take both to OT, they're getting in because seriously the Wings are not going to beat the Rangers guys

# ¿ Apr 8, 2016 03:04

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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The Red Wings only hope is that the Rangers decide that they just want to play Florida and send out the Wolfpack on Friday, and even then, that's not a lock because the Wings are hot dogshit on a Phoenix sidewalk in the summertime

# ¿ Apr 8, 2016 03:13

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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i am the bird posted:

Gonna be such an impressive loss by Detroit.

qft

Neodoomium posted:

I would like to hug a Rangers fan for the opportunity Detroit has been given tomorrow.

If they blow it, it's their own goddamn fault.

when

# ¿ Apr 8, 2016 23:58

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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Aphrodite posted:

Told you, suicidal Flyers fans.

i'm mad at the bruins for ruining my i told you so moment when the wings eventually lose this game too

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 19:53

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

that beeping noise you hear is the entire atlantic division backing into the playoffs

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 19:56

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

and the red wings regular season ends with a loud, wet fart but they somehow still manage to make the playoffs

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 20:10

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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Aphrodite posted:

Detroit's long brown playoff streak.

playoff thread title tia

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 20:13

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Neodoomium posted:

I am annoyed that Blashill was supposed to be so good with all these young guys but then he plays none of them and also benches Anthony Mantha

would be nice if some of those young guys could get some top-6 minutes but we need space on the wings for abdelkader and brad richards

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 20:29

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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VJeff posted:

I'm half convinced somebody in the front office is pulling his strings. It makes so little sense for him to win a championship in the AHL with these guys then go "Well, gently caress all of you, go ride pine for Jonathan Ericsson."

that someone is called 35M in dead money

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 20:30

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

let's measure dicks for our respective conferences while failing to admit that only like 3 or 4 teams in the entire league have been good for more than about 50% of their season

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 20:36

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Divisional Playoffs Promote Rivalries

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 20:40

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

hey if we just had regular straight seeding, we would probably see a philly/pittsburgh, rangers/islanders, panthers/lightning first round but guys RIVALRIES

e: we also wouldn't be guaranteed to see one of the two best teams in the conference knocked out before the ECF but whatever

Aphrodite posted:

Being good the whole season is unreasonable, that's why it lasts so long.

being outright bad for half of it shouldn't be

Teemu Pokemon fucked around with this message at 20:46 on Apr 9, 2016

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 20:43

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Gio posted:

that one's easy: Barry Melrose.

how in the sweet hell did it take 10 posts for someone to say this

# ¿ Apr 9, 2016 23:05

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

cancel the playoffs tia

# ¿ Apr 10, 2016 00:36

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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triple sulk posted:

Michigan (the state) is bad.

i want to reiterate that you're saying this while being from pennsylvania

you are aware that people who root for the steelers, eagles, phillies, flyers, and penn state football are contained within your borders?

the people in your state are a half step above men in yogurt commercials

most of pennsylvania is the ozarks with the added benefit of abandoned strip mines

there's a reason why the word 'pennsyltucky' exists

i would rather vacation in mogadishu than spend any time with anyone from pennsylvania

# ¿ Apr 10, 2016 03:46

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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Citizen Tayne posted:

Pennsylvania is a fine Northeastern state that is host to some of the biggest cities in America, and is completely middle-of-the-road as far as American states go. If you think Pennsylvania sucks, blame America as a whole.

pennsylvania is at best the the 5th best state in an area that contains ohio, new jersey, west virginia, and connecticut

# ¿ Apr 10, 2016 03:52

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

Citizen Tayne posted:

Penn State belongs in Alabama, not in PA. I don't accept blame for any of that poo poo.

maybe you should blame america

# ¿ Apr 10, 2016 03:53

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

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Citizen Tayne posted:

Actually, it's the best state in that list, because the Penguins, Pirates, and Steelers are in Pennsylvania. Kiss the rings, bitch.

less rings than a city that contains The Detroit Lions boom roasted

# ¿ Apr 10, 2016 03:56

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

AsInHowe posted:

This is cool.

lookit all the loving lovely names on there

# ¿ Apr 10, 2016 04:01

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# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 00:50

Teemu Pokemon: Jun 19, 2004; To sign them is my real test

With full no movement clause

i want one of these for pittsburgh too but it would mostly be about eating too much sausage

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNnkDjMVJqE&t=299s

# ¿ Apr 10, 2016 04:18

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Sports Argument Stadium > NHL Offseason N/V April - When the Balls Come Out, Nothing's Going to Change

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