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Kramer struggling and moving about in his seat: Gah, yaah! Jerry: Will you keep still. Don't draw attention to us! Kramer: I can't do it Jerry! Sitting still for this long in a plane. It's no good for you. I'll get deep vein thrombosis! Jerry: Deep vein thrombosis? Kramer: Oh you might seem fine but then you get off the plane, walk around a bit and then zzzzzzbifffPOP - drop dead! *Hijacker notices and come to see what the problem is. Hijacker: Hey! What is going on over here? Jerry: I'm sorry, Mr Hijacker, but my friend here.; He's worried he'll get deep vein thrombosis. Hijacker: Oh I've heard of this. Yes it's very very bad to sit for so long. Ok ok, your friend can get up and stretch his legs. Kramer: G-giddy up! Jerry: Thank you, you're very kind. Hijacker: Oh it is no problem. Jerry: So, how did you get to be a, uh, hijacker. Is there a school for that? Hijacker: Yes, in Afghanistan; but truth be told I did not always want to be a hijacker. Jerry: Oh? Hijacker: No, I wished to go into business here in America with my brother Babu, in his restaurant but sadly it was not to be. Jerry: Wait, Babu?! We know Babu! Hijacker: You do? Jerry: Yes! We're great friends. Hijacker: Oh it's such a small world isn't it? Well any friend of Babu's is a friend of mine. I am Abu, and you? Jerry: Well this is Kramer. Kramer: C-cosmo! Jerry: And I'm Jerry. Hijacker: Jerry? Jerry Seinfeld? Jerry: That's right.
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Aug 4, 2016 18:52
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It seems anything + 9/11 is a winning formula
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Aug 4, 2016 20:09
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Red Suit posted:It seems anything + 9/11 is a winning formula Muslims + 9/11 didn't go over so well.
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Aug 4, 2016 20:10
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Funky See Funky Do posted:Kramer struggling and moving about in his seat: Gah, yaah! lol
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Aug 4, 2016 20:14
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Applewhite posted:Muslims + 9/11 didn't go over so well. 9/11 was kind of the 9/11 for the falafel business
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Aug 4, 2016 20:14
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Funky See Funky Do posted:Kramer struggling and moving about in his seat: Gah, yaah!
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Aug 4, 2016 20:19
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Quality poo poo guys, keep it up
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Aug 4, 2016 20:27
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This poster loves police brutality, but only when its against minorities!
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*George walks in excitedly carrying two boxes. Jerry is watching TV* Jerry: What's with the boxes? George: Jerry, I have a great idea-- Jerry: Oh boy... George: Ever since the towers since fell, it's all anyone's been talking about. Plane this, terrorism that. They keep showing footage on the news. So I think--free advertising, right? Jerry: I think I know where this is going. *George starts walking towards the table* George: I saw a guy on the street selling little hats with the World Trade Center on them. Get this--he sold out. For twenty dollars a pop. Twenty dollars! Can you imagine those profit margins? Jerry: Let me guess, you went out and made 9/11 hats to sell to people? George: What? No no no... *George drops the boxes on a chair, revealing his white T-shirt emblazoned with the American flag, a soaring eagle, the Twin Towers, and the words REMEMBER in alternating red, white and blue* Jerry: You've got to be kidding me. George: Hey, if we don't do it, someone else will. Jerry: George, don't you think it's wrong to take advantage of people's fear like this? George: Oh c'mon, Jerry, we'd make a killing! Jerry: That's my point, I think there's been enough killing. *George scoffs and rolls his eyes* Jerry: Besides, that shirt is ridiculous! Who would actually buy one of those things? *Kramer walks in with the same T-shirt as George* Kramer: Jerry, I've got a great idea-- Jerry and George: KRAMER!
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Aug 4, 2016 22:14
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 This jet fuel.... is making me THIRSTY
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Aug 4, 2016 22:32
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trash person posted:Did you guys know Elaine didn't actually exist on the show? She was a figment of Jerry's imagination. "~~This crazy banshee is just a friggin denizen of my addled and disturbed mind-- what's up with th~a~a~t??"
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Aug 4, 2016 22:38
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Honestly I want to give this a shot ~ *Jerry is watching TV and sees the live broadcast of the plane hitting the towers. He hunches forward in anticipation, looking deeply worried and concerned* *Kramer falls through the front door in his signature style* Kramer: Hey Jerry, great news! *Jerry's eyes remain trained on the TV set* Kramer: "Hey, boy-o -- didn't you hear me? Great news! Elaine's plane just landed in Manhattan, she's back!" *Jerry freezes then slowly turns toward Kramer* Jerry: "Sh-- She's back? When did she arrive?" Kramer: "Just now, Jerry! The cars all warmed up in the front, we gotta get a move on!" Jerry: "Oh I'm going to be sick" *Jerry, barely uttering the last word before his voice cracks with anguish, clutches his stomach* Kramer: "Hey, what's wrong, Jerry? You look like you've seen a ghost--" *Jerry meekly gestures towards the TV set* *Kramer looks on, confused at first but shortly after utterly horrified in realization of what has happened* Kramer: "oh, oh this is no good... this is no good at all.." *Kramer squats down, burying his face in his hands. He makes nary a sound* *Light knock at the door, George enters while clutching a couple of boxes* George: "Jerry-- Oh, hi Kramer-- Jerry, I have a great idea--"
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Aug 4, 2016 22:56
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Kramer: You know my friend, Bob Sacamano, the guy who masterminded the 9/11 attacks? He's working for the CIA, Jerry. HE'S A SPOOK JERRY! A SPOOK!
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Aug 4, 2016 22:59
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I am Toni Lippi posted:Kramer: You know my friend, Bob Sacamano, the guy who masterminded the 9/11 attacks? He's working for the CIA, Jerry. HE'S A SPOOK JERRY! A SPOOK! 50 years ago we'd have you upside down with a fuckin fork up your rear end
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Aug 4, 2016 23:03
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If you're reading this and haven't read the script in the OP, it only takes like 5-20 minutes based on your reading speed and it's so perfectly Seinfeld that you can imagine the entire thing in your head as if you were watching it.
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Aug 4, 2016 23:03
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FoxStrats posted:Honestly I want to give this a shot hahahahahaha
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Aug 4, 2016 23:15
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sismpsons did it first
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Aug 4, 2016 23:18
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The whole cast would've still been in the Massachusetts prison system on 9/11/01, according to the final episode. Jerry's running the purple gang, Kramer's Aryan Nation, George got swole, Elaine overdosed in solitary. Not a single one of them gave two shits about some towers.
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Aug 4, 2016 23:37
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Throwdown posted:That was actually pretty drat funny.
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Aug 4, 2016 23:45
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Iron Prince posted:sismpsons did it first first good post in this thread
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Aug 5, 2016 00:22
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Iron Prince posted:sismpsons did it first finally, an effort post
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Aug 5, 2016 00:53
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Iron Prince posted:sismpsons did it first Why he wearing a skull cap?
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Aug 5, 2016 00:57
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Iron Prince posted:sismpsons did it first truth
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Aug 5, 2016 01:54
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What's the deal with airplane peanuts?
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Aug 5, 2016 01:57
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Funky See Funky Do posted:Kramer struggling and moving about in his seat: Gah, yaah! goldmine
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Aug 7, 2016 11:14
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