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The Notorious ZSB
Apr 19, 2004

I SAID WE'RE NOT GONNA BE FUCKING SUCK THIS YEAR!!!

MEDIA DAYS HAVE BEGUN (many are already over) but that means the season is nearly upon us. With less than 40 days before the first game kicks it's about time for us to dream big and spin wild tales of success that some of us will get to enjoy. Mostly I'm sure we'll all be a heartbroken mess by week 4 or 5 because CFB is a cruel cruel mistress.

So my format remains Date/Opponent/Win|Loss% expectation with Best, Expected, and Worst Case outcomes to set the floor and ceiling of the prediction.

Tennessee Volunteers


Last season was really close to being super memorable, but ended up being memorable for a lot of not so great reasons (injuries, Texas A&M, Bama, South Carolina, Vandy all managed to beat the Vols in middle October into november) and a lot of the talent base left (Barnett, LBs, Dobbs) so this year feels like way more of a toss up. Hopefully Butch has some better depth this year after having to push guys into roles last year.

Sept 4 - Georgia Tech Chic-Fil-A Kickoff Classic - 50|50 : GT was sorta sneakily better than you'd have thought they'd be last year. CPJ is always tricky and with so many new faces it feels like a Toss Up.
Sept 9 - Indiana State - 95|5 : Easy paid win on a short week.
Sept 16 - @ Florida - 45|55 : Finally got over that hump last year, but it didn't matter anyway. New QBs on both teams means I have no idea but will continue to give Florida the benefit in this game being in the Swamp and uhh 1 year doesn't mean poo poo. Even Kentucky beat the Vols once in 30 years (maybe they can beat Florida sometime too).
Sept 23 - UMass - 95|5 : Another pay em gimme game. Former VT QB Andrew Ford is the starter at UMass and he's got kind of a noodle arm so prb a feel good rebound perhaps.
Sept 30 - Georgia - 55|45 : Last year's game was wild and seemingly Butch has found ways to beat Georgia after coming close his first couple years. Plus the turf at Neyland seems to claim a bulldog everytime.
Oct 14 - South Carolina - 60|40 : Umm it was embarrassing losing to them last year, they'll be better but Muschamp ain't got much depth yet. As long as we're healthy we should win this game.
Oct 21 - @ Alabama - 15|85 : I can't say they've got no chance, but its not far from no chance. Bama just too good, this team likely won't challenge them in October with a new starter at QB.
Oct 28 - @ Kentucky - 75|25 : Butch Jones owns Mark Stoops. They're a better team, but that rivalry mojo is still there.
Nov 4 - Southern Miss - 90|10 : Closing out the non conference p weak, but it should ensure the Vols make a bowl game...they aren't the 0-12 disaster but I'm not too worried about the November fluff.
Nov 11 - @ Missouri - 60|40 : Well we've not been so great against Mizzou, its on the road and we only won because they turned it over a million times last year. Vols should still be in a better spot, but the margin isn't wide with this program this season.
Nov 18 - LSU - 30|70 : I think they'll have a better team with a stronger defense and a more mature offense. Maybe we can repeat the Dooley 13 men formation! :ugh:
Nov 25 - Vanderbilt - 60|40 : Yeah I dunno both or one of these teams could need this win for bowl eligibility. They got us last year when we were broken so health might decide this one too.

Best Case Scenario 10-2/6-2 SEC - The QB isn't a drop off and the defense stays healthy. If they could clean up some of the turnovers (both with the football and personnel) the team could be surprisingly good with John Kelly at RB and the WR talent. Dline talent needs to stay healthy, but the options are good there. Win close, drop 2 and get a chance to be smooshed by Alabama probably in the SECCG. This would ensure Butch isn't on the hot seat (which is silly imo but thats a separate debate).

Expected Scenario 8-4/4-4 SEC - You could add an SEC win and replace it with a GT loss in this scenario too. The team will be competitive against everyone but Bama, but will probably manage to lose a couple (Georgia/Florida/Bama/LSU feel most likely, or in Vols fashion beat someone get us excited then lose to Kentucky or something stupid). I think this keeps Butch on a warm not hot seat.

Worse Case Scenario 6-6/3-5 SEC - Things haven't gone to plan. An opening loss to GT sets up an early season gamut leaving them in the hole by October with a 2-3 record looking at an annoying SEC schedule and little shot at the division. Beat the bottom feeders to maintain a bowl game, but lose to improving teams in the division. Butch might lose his job with this performance.

Virginia Tech Hokies


If you wanted a blueprint for how to retire your legendary coach and have a smooth transition talk to Whit. Fuente came in, made the offense exciting, instilled a mentality that buckled on occasion but never gave up, and came really close to stealing an ACC title from Clemson. All in all seeing 10 wins again with a lot of mojo breaking performances (@ Pitt, crushing ECU/BC, Comebacks vs ND & Arky)was inspiring for Tech fans. He'll need to keep winning even with the loss of some all VT talent to bolster recruiting which feels improved, but to get us up again with FSU/Clemson in the ACC we need more top end talent. After year 1 though I think most Tech fans are optimistic about Fuente's ability to get us back into the big time discussion.

Sept 3 - West Virginia @ FedEx Field Battle for the Black Diamond Trophy - 55|45 : The fuckin COUSINS! I'm glad to see this rivalry be renewed after so long, even though it engenders much hate from both fan bases. WVU fans will tell you Grier will tear it up, but who knows esp in week 1 vs one of the best DC in the country. As long as we find a QB and a WR or two worth a drat I like our chances. The memory of Miami smooshing them in the bowl game weighs heavy coupled with the Big 12 being kind of a trash conference beyond the top 2 teams makes me feel like their W total last year might not be indicative of the state of the program. Losing your entire LB corp (i think with their lone returner down from injury for the first month) won't be good vs Fuente's offense either.
Sept 9 - Delaware - 95|5 : Short week gimme. They aren't quite the FCS program they used to be and I trust Fuente to have the team ready.
Sept 16 - @ ECU - 75|25 : Okay so that Duke QB we didn't have to face last year, guess we get 2 Duke QBs this year! I'm no longer worried about ECU with Fuente at the helm. They shouldn't have gotten rid of Ruffin.
Sept 23 - Old Dominion - 90|10 : First game in a series that will see us play down in the 757 eventually for recruiting purposes. They're a good squad, but I don't think they'll have the talent to hang with us having only been in FBS for a few years now. Give this a few years, this game will be our new ECU game with fans desperately wishing we didn't have to see them every year.
Sept 30 - Clemson - 40|60 : I think like last season this should be a fun competitive game, but Clemson has more depth and talent. It showed last year and being in Blacksburg helps, but I don't think we've caught up to them yet. Beat them we're prb ahead of schedule and a hype train can fire up.
Oct 7 - @ Boston College - 80|20 : Lollfer still the OC? Not too worried. Chestnut Hill is a ghost town of a stadium these days too so not much home field advantage there.
Oct 21 - UNC - 65|35 : I don't think Brandon Harris is the answer and they've never fielded more than a conscious defense under Fedora. I think they're stepping back this year and we should be able to get them even without a hurricane.
Oct 28 - Duke - 55|45 : Why is Duke always a loving nightmare for us? Cutcliffe and his NFL god damned QBs that's why. We should win because I don't see their defense improving, but it's never an easy game and if they're improved could win this (they've done it before see 2013).
Nov 4 - @ Miami - 50|50 : Likely the Coastal title game if the media is to be believed. Whoever gets the better QB play will win as I expect both teams to be salty on defense. Richt concerns me since he can recruit like gang busters, but for now this is still a good rivalry game, total toss up.
Nov 11 - @ Georgia Tech - 50|50 : CPJ might make you mad, but you gotta respect his coaching chops (get it chop block o clock). Our games tend to be tight 1 possession affairs and I don't expect this to be any different. We're capable of totally shutting GT down, but see last year as reason never to sleep on them and not to expect an easy W.
Nov 18 - Pitt - 60|40 : Getting over our Heinz Field curse was huge last season, and they will not be scoring that many points this fall (Watson is a definite downgrade from Canada). Plus I think they're gonna be easier to run on this year. I think late in the season we should win this at home.
Nov 24 - @ Virginia - 100|0 : Suck it Wahoos. Bronco isn't beating us with the talent he's got there, and we're gonna have it 14 straight.

Best Case Scenario 10-2/6-2 ACC - You could swap an opening loss to WVU with another ACC game here if you wanted for this prediction. Either way, we're winning against the lesser programs on the schedule and I would target the Duke/Miami/GT run of weekends as the most likely to have losses in. In this scenario, the defense edges towards elite again, and our QB is a plus for the team while the run game actually works beyond our QB. We probably have a punchers chance in the ACCCG with a shot at the Orange Bowl. If PSU on their tear as 11-2 champs last year didn't make the playoff I wouldn't think this team would either.

Expected Scenario 9-3/5-3 ACC - I firmly believe we will beat WVU on opening weekend, but lose to Clemson and a couple other ACC squads to have a solid second season for Fuente that leaves the opportunity to win 10 in a bowl game again. This probably means we are close to the division title, but I would think this is a game behind the winner (Could it actually be Miami's year?). This record much like last year could be enough to get into the ACCCG. Florida bowl game a possibility.

Worst Case Scenario 7-5/4-4 ACC - Lose to WVU, sweep the remaining OOC then slog to a mediocre finish in the ACC behind inconsistent or inadequate QB play and a lack of playmakers at WR/RB. Bowl streak continues but it doesn't feel so great.

ITS ALMOST HERE. Also thanks to Frinkahedron for hooking me up with these awesome photos he took at the Battle of Bristol last fall.

The Notorious ZSB fucked around with this message at 21:17 on Jul 21, 2017

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The Notorious ZSB
Apr 19, 2004

I SAID WE'RE NOT GONNA BE FUCKING SUCK THIS YEAR!!!

KIM JONG TRILL posted:

UTEP - W - Boomer Sooner
@Ohio State - W - Boomer Sooner
Tulane - W - Boomer Sooner
@Baylor - W - gently caress Baylor
Iowa State - W - Boomer Sooner
Texas - W - Boomer Sooner
@Kansas State - W - Boomer Sooner
Texas Tech - W - Boomer Sooner
@Oklahoma State - W - Boomer Sooner
TCU - W - Boomer Sooner
@Kansas - W - Boomer Sooner
WVU - W - Boomer Sooner
Big 12 Championship - W - Boomer Sooner
CFP Semi-Final - W - Boomer Sooner
CFP Championship - W - Boomer Sooner

It wouldn't be one of these threads without a whole prediction full of BOOMER SOONER.

Also somehow forgot to mention in the Vols preview, but Smoky dog remains a very good dog. Perhaps the best dog mascot rip MACTION PUP.

The Notorious ZSB fucked around with this message at 00:49 on Jul 22, 2017

The Notorious ZSB
Apr 19, 2004

I SAID WE'RE NOT GONNA BE FUCKING SUCK THIS YEAR!!!

That GreyGhost is arte.

The Notorious ZSB
Apr 19, 2004

I SAID WE'RE NOT GONNA BE FUCKING SUCK THIS YEAR!!!

General Predictions on the Eve of the Season:

Alabama is a murder machine, but one that will lose 2 games this year and only play in a NY6 bowl. (It has to happen again sometime right?)

Country's #1 defense will be from the ACC.

Country's #1 offense will be from CUSA.

Snyder Cats for Big 12 champs, because Gundy can't have nice things, Herman ain't got a QB, and Oklahoma seems to be good for a dud each year these days.

Michigan loses to Ohio State again; Harbaugh gets ejected for yelling at officials and stepping out on the field to do so.

Oregon will be like 8-9 win good again?

UVA and Rutgers will wish they were in the Ivy League where they might get a .500 record

Rich Rod is the first coach fired in Arizona but won't be the last.

The AAC is better than the Big 12 by seasons end in S&P+ (THEY'LL WISH THEY KEPT CHARLIE AROUND)

Syracuse goes bowling and ends up pissing in someone's cereal pulling an upset they prb shouldn't.

The Notorious ZSB
Apr 19, 2004

I SAID WE'RE NOT GONNA BE FUCKING SUCK THIS YEAR!!!

Midseason Update:

Hokies - On schedule as predicted, looking good for the best case scenario and the expected one as the floor imo.

Volunteers - WAY BEHIND SCHEDULE, TRAIN IS MOSTLY OFF THE TRACKS. I would be surprised at this point if they make it to 6 wins. Beyond the worst case scenario honestly.

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