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"What's the deal with," I write, and I stare at these words for what seems an interminable moment. Finally, tentatively, I add "grapefruit?" No good. I crumple the paper up and toss it aside, slumping into the growing pile of rejected ideas on my desk. Out of the corner of my eye I glance my latest failure. It's landed next to one from a few minutes ago, "What's the deal with nutmeg?" The papers are mangled in such a way that it appears two words are sitting beside one another: "grape...nut." I consider them for a moment, then sweep them off the desk into the trash can and begin to sob.
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May 21, 2018 22:01
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Apr 27, 2024 21:23
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He'll never be the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. You know, on account of...losing his...head.
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May 24, 2018 23:08
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Anus? Why, it almost ended his life!
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May 25, 2018 14:35
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"This is really hard."
"Oh?"
"Yeah, assembling this. I'm trying to connect these two pieces, but look. I'm having a lot of trouble getting it in."
"Do you need help?"
"I think I just need to grab it, twist it and pull it really hard, and then it'll start coming."
"Yeah, that might work."
"Do you think it would help if I lick it?"
"I dunno."
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May 26, 2018 21:49
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What's updog, you ask? There's actually no such thing. I'm not sure why I even brought it up.
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May 31, 2018 23:06
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Hello, yes. Have you seen a man named Michael Rotch? No? How about Alan Coholic? Well, is your refrigerator in good working condition? That's ok, I'll inquire elsewhere. Thanks for your time.
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Jun 2, 2018 01:34
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I went to the zoo the other day. All they had on exhibit was one small dog. It was a Pomeranian.
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Jun 2, 2018 20:38
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 27, 2024 21:23
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Nicholas Sparks' The Jokebook
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Jun 3, 2018 20:16
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May 21, 2018 22:01
