need to smuggle a :LOT of maple syrup across canadian border (theoretical)

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > need to smuggle a :LOT of maple syrup across canadian border (theoretical)

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bird.

bit of a logistical p[roblem i got here as i gots a biggerooni amt of maple syrup (tjeoretically) that i need to get across the border w/o authorities noticing but have no idea how to do it and not get caught, in theory

# ? Dec 31, 2020 05:43

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# ? May 3, 2024 13:50

Areola Grande: it's a free country u pervs

pipeline

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# ? Dec 31, 2020 05:46

bird.

my first thought was dialysis to replace someones blood w/ maple syrup and then take the maple syrup out and put the blood back in after they got across i was told this was potentially not a workable plan

# ? Dec 31, 2020 05:49

bird.

prepuce repurposed posted:

pipeline

opssibly connecting a bunch of straws together and then siphoning from a vat on one side into a tub on the other?

# ? Dec 31, 2020 05:56

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

cut off the water supply to Niagara Falls and replace it with syrup.

# ? Dec 31, 2020 06:13

vanisher

wait which direction is the syrup going in this scenario

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Dec 31, 2020 06:24

mailorder bees: FLUFFERNUTTER

i like to think INTO canada

thanks Manifisto!

# ? Dec 31, 2020 07:05

bird.

mailorder bees! posted:

i like to think INTO canada

correvct

# ? Dec 31, 2020 07:26

bird.

i am dodging maple syruyp import tariffs and bringing 100% pure golden sticky vermont in (as a thought experiemtn)

# ? Dec 31, 2020 07:28

bird.

Wondering about maybe pouring it into jeans, and then wearing the jeans across and squeezing out the syrup as I get 9n the other side (as a purely speculative fiction, in the mind)

# ? Dec 31, 2020 07:47

mailorder bees: FLUFFERNUTTER

jeans theyll expect, you gotta m ake it socks

thanks Manifisto!

# ? Dec 31, 2020 07:48

mailorder bees: FLUFFERNUTTER

supposing wild animals can cross the border fairly freely, what if you soak it into some small woodland creatures, let them cross the border, then squeeze it back out?

thanks Manifisto!

# ? Dec 31, 2020 08:13

Stoner Sloth

mailorder bees! posted:

supposing wild animals can cross the border fairly freely, what if you soak it into some small woodland creatures, let them cross the border, then squeeze it back out?

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# ? Dec 31, 2020 13:12

Finger Prince

Grow a sugar maple right on the border and then put the tap in on the north side.

# ? Dec 31, 2020 13:27

Finger Prince

We got so much maple syrup here though we're shipping it to Germany for funsies.

# ? Dec 31, 2020 13:28

Stoner Sloth

smuggle it through in a shipment of pumpkin spice

# ? Dec 31, 2020 14:11

nut

I move mine in the wiper fluid compartment of my automobile

# ? Dec 31, 2020 14:19

Stoner Sloth

hollowed out hockey sticks

# ? Dec 31, 2020 14:53

biosterous

Stoner Sloth posted:

hollowed out hockey sticks

as if the border security wouldn't sense in their souls that something was wrong with some hockey sticks nearby :cmon:

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^{^{gallery of sigs}}

he/him

# ? Dec 31, 2020 15:27

nut

actually officer it�s heroine

# ? Dec 31, 2020 16:40

Luvcow: One day nearer spring

have you ever seen "the road warrior"?

# ? Dec 31, 2020 17:28

Heather Papps: hello friend

ur gonna wanna freeze it in the shape of a boat, and then tow that boat across the border
(this will only work in winter or winter 2)

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 31, 2020 20:00

google THIS

Border agent: Are you all right, sir? You look ill.

Me: I just need to use the bathroom. (sloshing sounds as I fidget in my seat) Do you know where I can find one? Past the checkpoint, of course. (lets out a maple-scented fart)

# ? Dec 31, 2020 20:07

Nosfereefer: IF YOU FIND THIS POSTER OUTSIDE BYOB, PLEASE RETURN THEM. WE ARE VERY WORRIED AND WE MISS THEM

op this is a once in a ear opportunity! if you time it right, youll be able to toss the goods over the border at new years eve.

y
ou cant get convicted for a crime you did last year

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

# ? Dec 31, 2020 20:46

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

You got to just play it real smooth and jazz that syrup across, with the jazz.
Do you feel me?

# ? Jan 1, 2021 01:07

Finger Prince

Put it in a barrel and send it over Niagara falls.

# ? Jan 1, 2021 01:10

mailorder bees: FLUFFERNUTTER

can you send a barrel back up niagara falls?

thanks Manifisto!

# ? Jan 1, 2021 01:14

Finger Prince

need to smuggle a :LOT of empty, sticky barrels across the US border (theoretical)

# ? Jan 1, 2021 01:25

google THIS

Maybe the real maple syrup we smuggled across the Canadian border was the friends we made along the way

# ? Jan 1, 2021 01:42

Buttchocks: No, I like my hat, thanks.

leave it somewhere near the border and then have that location declared an enclave of Canada. boom done

# ? Jan 1, 2021 04:53

mailorder bees: FLUFFERNUTTER

write "canadian" on it and when you go through the border, tell the mounties you're returning stolen property

thanks Manifisto!

# ? Jan 1, 2021 05:34

vanisher

Boil it and the maple steam will make a big cloud you can just ride over the border

_{Sig images courtesy of the talented Luvcow, Dumb Sex-Parrot, & Death Sext}

# ? Jan 1, 2021 08:28

Stoner Sloth

fire it over in cannon balls and claim you're re-enacting the war of 1812

# ? Jan 1, 2021 08:31

Escape From Noise

Simple, you just need several orders of pancakes and waffles

# ? Jan 1, 2021 09:59

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

What you got to do is dilute that goopy tree-love-juice!
* 1 part per 100.
*Ship it over in old oak casks, labeled as water (no tax in water of course, unless magic water)
*Heat it a lot
*Syrup is back, alriiight!

You can also dilute the pancake batter the same way.

Theoretically!

# ? Jan 1, 2021 11:18

bird.

Pouring maple syrup into a hole until the maple syrup grpundswell reaches a certain level and extracting it with a well on the other side

# ? Jan 1, 2021 12:28

Finger Prince

Label the containers "cannabis oil"

# ? Jan 1, 2021 12:35

RickRogers: Woh, is that a thing I like??

Trained. Raccoons.

# ? Jan 1, 2021 12:41

Escape From Noise

bird. posted:

Pouring maple syrup into a hole until the maple syrup grpundswell reaches a certain level and extracting it with a well on the other side

Looking for a Canadian girlfriend so I can watch her pour maple syrup on a tampon 1x/month (in metric)

# ? Jan 1, 2021 12:50

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# ? May 3, 2024 13:50

Escape From Noise

Okay. You're going to need one very large bone in ham

Thank you Pot Smoke Pheonnix for this Kickin' Rad sig

# ? Jan 1, 2021 16:04

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > need to smuggle a :LOT of maple syrup across canadian border (theoretical)

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