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Tricky
Jun 12, 2007

after a great meal i like to lie on the ground and feel like garbage


Benjamin Franklin, Super Skrull
PP: 1 | XP: 0

Lost in the hustle and bustle associated with narrow survival against remarkable odds, one might be forgiven for letting the humble bandaged man slip out of sight — and, of course, mind. The acting associated with taking a minor console explosion is certainly part of it, as the one and only BENJAMIN FRANKLIN was nothing if not a self-proclaimed thespian, though surely his power matrix provided no small amount of help. He watches carefully for a moment, picking and choosing his moment to reveal himself to the team and surely win over every heart and mind on the bridge... though he does find that one heart, in particular, is of greater interest in this moment. Moving quietly to flank Big Barda's own flanking maneuver, the founding father allows his invisibility to fade after assuming his more typical assumed identity. A touch older, a bit of paunch, and the wizened looks of one of the noble founding fathers of the United States.

Ben loudly proclaims, "Alas, I find the very accusation strikes to my heart, dear captain! I've been accused of many things, you see, such as wanton debauchery, some tremendously well-executed statecraft, and a touch of vile wizardry—" He pats the air in a placating gesture. "—That last one is a vile lie, I'm afraid, as the indubitable Doctor Strange needed an excuse to remove me as a romantic rival... The others, entirely accurate. Assassination, though? Perish the thought! Does this Hulkster seem an assassin? Hardly! He seems more the consummate showman — and as he's mentioned, a man of shows!"

Turning his attentions to Big Barda, he adds, "And, madame, may I just mention what an honor it is to behold your remarkable physique? You strike me as being the very pattern from whom the standards of beauty are derived!"

quote:

Affiliation: Solo d6 | Buddy d8 | Team d10

Distinctions:
Founding Father
Historical Horndog
Time-Lost Skrull Infiltrator

Power Set — Fantastic Power Matrix:
Flame Blast — d10
Flame Mastery — d10
Force Blast — d8
Invisibility — d10
Stretching — d8
Subsonic Flight — d8
Superhuman Durability — d10
Superhuman Strength — d10
SFX: Area Attack. Against multiple targets, for each additional target add a d6 and keep an effect die.
SFX: Fiery Body. On a successful reaction against a melee attack action, inflict physical stress with the effect die. Spend a PP to step it up.
SFX: Force Constructs. When using a Force Blast power to create assets, add a d8 and step up the effect die.
SFX: Multipower. Add more than one Fantastic Power Matrix power die to a pool. Step back each Fantastic Power Matrix in that pool once for each die in the pool.
Limit: Conscious Activation. While stressed out, asleep, or unconscious, shutdown Fantastic Power Matrix. Recover that stress or wake up to recover Fantastic Power Matrix. If emotional trauma is received, shutdown Fantastic Power Matrix until trauma recovered.


Power Set — Skrull Paragon:
Enhanced Reflexes — d8
Enhanced Stamina — d8
Mind Control — d8
Shapeshifting — d10
SFX: Immunity. Spend 1 PP to ignore stress or trauma from vacuum, hunger, thirst, or fatigue.
Limit: Quick-Tempered. Gain 1 PP to step up emotional stress from taunting, insults, etc.


Specialties:
Combat Expert — d8
Cosmic Expert — d8
Science Master — d10
Psych Expert — d8
Tech Expert — d8
Vehicle Expert — d8

Distinction — A Man Of Appetites
1xp — when you name another character as a former romantic partner or reference some wild times you had.
3xp — when you help another character recover mental or emotional stress, or recover your own mental or emotional stress by flirting, partying, or socializing.
10xp — when you choose to jeopardize the team's efforts in pursuit of pleasure or give up a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to complete the team's mission.

Distinction — (Not So Secretly) A Skrull
1xp — when you let slip information about your true identity or say something completely anacronistic.
3xp — when your facade slips and it causes strife or distrust for the team.
10xp — when you either cast off your assumed identity for good or find some method to completely become Ben Franklin.

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Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?
Agent Addison
PP: 2 XP: 6 Stress: Physical d6

Addison can only stare as Terry G. Bollea bursts into the bridge and flies them all out of danger. As a chance hit kills another of her team. It's enough to make her wonder if any of this is really happening, if this is all just the dying hallucination of a woman at the end of her universe. But even if it is... it doesn't matter. She still has work to do.

"I'm sorry Doctor, but I'll have to pass." Agent Addison quietly pushes the offered bag of jelly babies away as the mood grows increasingly tense. She steps forward, brushing her trench coat aside to show the pistol strapped to her hip.

"We're here to keep the multiverse stabilized, Captain. That's all you need... to..." Addison is thrown off-track by the sudden appearance of an elder statesman of American politics. It's a wonder she can keep her face so serious.

"Captain, do you ever feel like the universe refuses to let you have a moment?"

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer




Hogan's nose flared at the implication of wrongdoing. "Lemme tell you something, the Hulkster doesn't sneak around in the shadows, he solves his problems head-on," Hogan declared. "But the Hundred-Dollar Dude is as honest as Abe Lincoln, I don't assassinate people! If they want a shot at the title, they'll have to get in the ring with the largest arms in the world!"

Hogan knocked his knuckles on the enormous gold title belt he wore around his waist. "So if that's what it's gonna take to settle this, I'm willing to put it on the line! BUT ARE YOU READY TO GO TOE-TO-TOE WITH ME AND THE MILLIONS OF LITTLE HULKSTERS WATCHING AT HOME?"

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

Unknown Spaceship

Big Barda narrows her eyes at the much shorter elder statesman, but grins slyly. "You may mention all you like, but know that if your hands leave my sight, my Mega-Rod will give you a lesson in etiquette." With that, she twirls the weapon in her hand.

Hook looks to Addison, still cautious, but smirking a bit. "I know exactly what you mean, my dear. Believe me." He raises a hand to the Hulk, gesturing to slow down. "I assure you, I have no interest in your...belt, my good man." He taps the Tallus on his wrist with his hook hand. "I have my own title to protect. If you are not here for trouble, then I must ask why you have been sent."

Just then, a strange voice is clearly heard. Hey - that's my cue!" And then, from the tarot card that Hulk Hogan was recently given, a beam of light and smoke suddenly erupts. The smoke spins and expands until a large blue man appears on the bridge, looking at the group. "Listen, I'm real glad you figured out not to kill each other all on your own, but we gotta talk. Like, now." He looks over to Hook and Mega Man X. "You, and you - the ones with the big ol' jewelry on. Look like you stole those from a high school costume annex. Look - I'm the genie, and I'm here to give you a little inside information. You're about to be in the same basic situation, we have to figure out a way to save you all, and we don't have a lot of time, because I'm definitely not supposed to be here!"

Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?
Agent Addison
PP: 2 XP: 6 Stress: Physical d6

Somehow, Addison can appreciate this random intruder's presence more than the others. Possibly because it's giving them an active mission and isn't just randomly jumping in to lend a hand.

"We're all only sent to places we don't belong. What's the situation?"

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

The Genie, who she can't help but notice looks pretty much exactly like the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air cosplaying Nightcrawler, smirks a bit at Addison's comment. "Yeah, I suppose you got that right. Well, here's the skinny on this thing. Let's get comfy, and chat it out." He waves his hands around a bit, and lounge chairs appear behind the various interdimensional travelers, pushing against their knees to...encourage...them to sit down. Genie continues, "You've probably guessed, but all of you been sent on the same basic mission. Something's snuffing out universes before their time, untold lives hanging in the balance, you've been plucked from the moment of your death and sent to save them with superpowers and a magic snap bracelet. Sound about right? What you haven't been told, is that there are more teams out there. A lot more teams. And whatever guide sent you on that mission - whether it was a manic flying fairie..." Genie looks to Hook meaningfully, "or an old lady with a tarot card fixation...Well, let's just say there are a lot of us giving out the missions. We tried coming up with a name for ourselves, but they all sounded dumb, and most of us guides aren't...joiners.

"Suffice to say, we've been sending superteams to patch up the multiverse, and we're no closer to finding the cause than when we started. And sometimes, things don't go according to plan. Our pirate friends here? They were making my colleagues nervous, so they got sent on a suicide mission to take out a pissed-off Hulk." He winks to Hogan. "Different Hulk, buddy. Loved you in Gremlins 2, by the way." He holds out his hand and a margarita appears in it, which he sips casually. "The rest of you were sent to kill Hook and his crew, since they've been continuing to irritate the other guides. But me? I'm not much for the assassination and murdering stuff. So...I'm done with that crew. Striking out on my own. And since you guys don't seem to feel like killing the Starjammer's crew of Exiles, well, you're in the same boat now." He points to Mega Man X, Hook, and then multiple arms start growing out of his body to point at the others. And himself as well.

"We all on the same page here? We need to figure out a way to accomplish this suicide mission, preferably without dying, and get everyone out of this place."

Cartridgeblowers
Jan 3, 2006

Super Mario Bros 3

Mega Man X

"So wait, you're... also Weapon X? Or Exiles?"

X looked at the Tallus on his wrist and then at the one on Hook's. He was already beginning to distrust this entire mission, but Madame Web had hidden all of this from them. How many more teams were there? Did their missions conflict or coincide? Why did he only recognize a couple of this group's crew? Did the blue guy say... assassins?

"So the mission is what, blue man? Take out a Hulk? I've taken out a Hulk before. The question is, what are your capabilities? Give me a sitrep on what you guys are capable of, then we'd be happy to help stop Banner if he's rampaging again. However, rest assured: we're not assassins."

He looks at Spiral and Doom.

"We're not killing anyone without reason."

Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?
Agent Addison
PP: 2 XP: 6 Stress: Physical d6

Addison just sat there, trying to wrap her head around everything she's been told. She never thought too hard about what exactly Weapon X did, but she was used to not having enough time to think. Trying to hold the world together keeps you busy, and her work in Weapon X felt like a continuation of that. No time to think, not when the multiverse's fate is on the line. Was that the plan? Keep them so busy they couldn't think about why this was happening? She's been in the game long enough to know that SHIELD would do the same for deniable assets if they could, but... This line of thinking is going nowhere. But there is one thought eating away at the back of her mind which needs to be discussed.

"So... We're going rogue, then. Because that's what we're doing, if we stay on this path."

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer





"I've dealt with a lotta managers in my time, dude." Hogan said, folding his 24-inch pythons over his chest. "Both good and bad. And I'm starting to get the feeling that the person in charge is more like that fink Bobby Heenan than the lovely Miss Elizabeth."

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

The Genie gives a sour look to X. "Blue Man?! I'm sorry, do I look like a mime up in here?" He waves a hand and the blue disappears, leaving him looking more or less exactly like Will Smith.

Hook nods to X. "We've known for some time that other groups were out there. We were told we were the Exiles, but we've...recently met another group of Exiles, in this very same dimension. They're assisting us with our mission even now, God willing that they are still alive."

Genie frowns a bit. "Let's just say there have been a lot of teams out there in the multiverse. Most of them are Exiles, like Hook and his crew - sent to try and correct a universe using superheroic mojo. You guys? Well...you're different. Weapon X teams are put together to be the strong right hand. Regime change, assassination, infiltration, that's what Madame Webb was grooming you guys for." He sighs, rubbing his temples. "When this all started, I thought we were helping. We were helping. Stitching the universe back together, keeping the fun times alive. All of us had lost our homes, but we were too powerful to be destroyed along with our homes. We wound up in the void, a bunch of nigh-omnipotent losers who hadn't even tried to save our homes. We banded together, and came up with a plan to fight back. But it's not enough!"

He looks to X meaningfully. "But then I heard about your run-in with Xavier's boy, Legion. And you actually got him to tell you a little bit about what's happening, why he did what he did. It didn't make a whole lot of sense, but from my perspective, it confirmed at least one thing - it's not just random universes snuffing out. Somebody is doing this, on purpose. Somebody talked to Legion, and told him what to do. As far as I'm concerned, we gotta find out who that joker was."

Hook speaks next. "You are right, of course, to ask our capabilities. Bad form on my part to not introduce ourselves more thoroughly. As I said, I am Captain James Tiberius Hook. I am no superhuman like my comrades, just a well-educated rapscallion with a blade and a trusty phaser. Big Barda, over there, is about the strongest person I've met, maybe second only to the Hulk himself. And armed with her Mega-Rod, she is quite the formidable opponent. The Doctor is our science man, who can build a rocket out of a paperclip and some spare wire. Darkman is the bandaged chap, a tortured soul who feels no physical pain, and yet is never at peace. And finally, Magneto here, the master of magnetism. We...used to have more comrades, but this is all that remains of our band of heroes."

The Doctor clears his throat a bit, and presses a few buttons on a nearby console. The viewscreen lights up, showing an image of a massive pink crystal - one which looks not too dissimilar from the Tallus itself. "This, my space-time-displaced friends, is the M'Kraan Crystal. A device that defies all mortal understanding. A seemingly mundane physical object, it nonetheless contains boundless energies. In a sense, the crystal contains the very universe - perhaps even the multiverse - that we now find ourselves within. If you hold the crystal, you hold your own existence. This is the reason why we are all here. The crystal has, for most of recorded history, been under the protection of the Shi'ar Empire, ruled most recently by Majestrix Lilandra. Unfortunately, there has been a coup. The Hulk, sent to space by heroes from his native Earth, wound up enslaved by the Empire as a gladiator. He eventually led a rebellion, and quite rightly I might add, but then things turned quite sour. He seized power, ejecting Lilandra from her throne and into exile...No pun intended, of course." He smiles, a big toothy grin. He has continued to display visual aids throughout his presentation, and the current one shows a team of other superheroes - a woman in pink and white, a man in a green and purple outfit on a glider, a man dressed all in a resplendent white suit, and others. "Our team was stranded here when we failed to stop the Hulk from taking control. He means to use the M'Kraan Crystal, seemingly unconcerned with the fact that attempting to harness its energies will, without question, destroy this entire universe. Unable to stop him on our own, we managed to...waylay...this other group of Exiles. I managed to devise a device to hijack their Tallus, linking it to the good Captain's. They agreed to help us, and are currently seeking out other allies across the galaxy. And now, it appears our numbers have swelled once more."

At Addison's comment, The Genie changes shape into a beautiful brunette with a white streak in her hair. "No worries, Sugah - going Rogue is kind of my thing." He morphs back into his familiar form and winks. "Hogan's got the right idea, though you might want to watch what you say about Miss Elizabeth in this dimension."

Tricky
Jun 12, 2007

after a great meal i like to lie on the ground and feel like garbage


Benjamin Franklin, Super Skrull
PP: 1 | XP: 0

Carefully having kept his hands in view, if only the better to rub the bridge of his nose as the sheer magnitude of the problems this motley band faces become more evident, Ben finally sweeps the room with his gaze as he joins the remainder of the Weapon X team. He says, "Well, I cannot say that I fully grasp the finer points of the threat of universal extinction, nor the driving forces behind it, but it seems reasonable enough that we split the work among many willing hands. Is there a plan to go with the promise of other allies, or is this more of an aspirational gathering?"

Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?
Agent Addison
PP: 2 XP: 6 Stress: Physical d6

Agent Addison leans forward in her seat as the details are revealed. The M'Kraan Crystal is a new one, but it can't that different from your average Cosmic Cube or Thanos-driven reality flicker. A warlord Hulk looking for revenge isn't, and that's going to be fun to deal with but it is something you can deal with. And the other team... Well, they have someone Green Goblin-slash-Spider Man adjacent. That's something you can rely on. Despite it all, some small part of her feels confident.

"Even if we don't have a properly detailed plan, just look at everyone we have on board now. Easily a dozen, hopefully more. That's enough to start a real alliance. That's enough to work with."

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

The Doctor nods to Addison. "You are correct - that young man you see goes by Green Goblin, but he is quite the heroic figure. And rather brilliant, I might add. Good eye."

Hook smiles rakishly to the American forefather, "Well, we had a plan, certainly. But now that you lot have arrived...well, I trust you'll agree that it could do with certain adjustments. Your companion is correct - we have not one, not two, but three teams. My five, your seven, and the seven Exiles the good Doctor mentioned. Nearly twenty of us, all said and done. And we have...other allies, as well. Even now, the other Exiles have rendezvoused with the rightful Majestrix, Lilandra, and some of her still-loyal Imperial Guardsmen. And we have an ace up our sleeves, as well. Some of you may be familiar with the most powerful member of the Shi'ar Imperial Guard - Kallark the Gladiator. In this universe, the Shi'ar never found him and recruited him. They don't even know there's a single Stronian in the universe. If he joins us, that may just give us a warrior to nearly match the Hulk in strength.

"Beyond that...we had originally planned to try and lead the Hulk's forces on a merry chase while the Exiles attacked the throneworld. But now that you're here, perhaps we can come up with something new." Looking to X, the other Tallus-wielder, he shrugs. "Any suggestions?"

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer




"If this guy is supposed to be me," Hogan said, "We call him out with this!" He pointed to Big Gold, around his waist. "Whatever happens, a Hulkster can't resist going for the gold, brother. Tell everyone the WORLD CHAMPION is issuing an open challenge, he'll show up!"

Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?
Agent Addison
PP: 2 XP: 6 Stress: Physical d6

"Do we have any leads on Gladiator's current location? Getting him on-side would be useful, but we may not have the time to keep the main strike force waiting."

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

The Genie shrugs at the Hulkster. "Well, if we're trying to get attention, it seems like your man might be able to get just that."

Captain Hook thinks a moment. "Perhaps we can work it into a plan of sorts. We should reach out to Lilandra to see what the other Exiles have come up with, and how they are faring." Turning to Addison, he flashes a rougish smile. "Our allies should be on their way to collect him even as we speak." Nodding over to the Doctor, he looks to the viewscreen.

The Doctor taps a few buttons, then smiles. "I've got her, captain!"

The elegant face of the would-be Majestrix Lilandra Neramani appears on the screen. "Captain. We are glad that you are still among the living."

The Captain bows. "Majestrix. Indeed, my crew and I have cheated death another day - and we have been recruiting once more! It would seem that other...travelers, like ourselves, have arrived." He gestures to the Weapon X team. "I think we may need to update our plans a bit! Tell me - how fare the other Exiles?"

Lilandra smiles a bit. "Well. We have arrived at Kan'Sys, and they have departed for the planet to recruit this...Gladiator...you spoke of." She frowns then. "I only hope he is as powerful as you say."

Big Barda interjects, "He's strong enough. He's almost super." She smirks a bit.

Lilandra continues then, "We should let you know that we have already adapted the plan ourselves. One of the Exiles has taken it upon herself to infiltrate the usurper's court herself, along with one of my guardsmen. We hope that she may provide valuable intelligence."

Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?
Agent Addison
PP: 2 XP: 6 Stress: Physical d6

"If I may, Majestrix, I have one question." Agent Addison stands at attention, staring sternly at the screen. "How large of a window will your forces need to reach the M'Kraan crystal? We should be able to draw off the majority of their defenses with a standard fishhook scenario, but we do need to know how long to keep them hooked for our own preparations."

Tricky
Jun 12, 2007

after a great meal i like to lie on the ground and feel like garbage


Benjamin Franklin, Super Skrull
PP: 1 | XP: 0

The situation having far outstripped his memories of the state of galactic politics before his tumultuous trip through time, Ben rather good-naturedly radiates jovial bemusement while he awaits something to work his trademark charms upon... or unleash his secret powers upon, as seems more likely. He says, "I certainly can't speak for emperors, but all the kings I've had occasion to know are rather enamored by the allure of gold and other riches." He ponders, "Perhaps if the belt alone will not suffice to draw him out, we could make a play on the empire's more tangible — and fungible — goods. The money, if you will, in their bank."

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

Lilandra frowns to Addison. "We have possession of the Crystal, We were able to spirit it away when We fled from the throneworld. We cannot hide forever, though, and We cannot let that...brute remain in control. Every day he remains in power, Our people are threatened with pointless wars, misery, and subjugation. It must end."

As Ben muses aloud, Hook raises an eyebrow. "Hmm. I like that - we have no army of our own, but perhaps we can turn the Shi'ar armies against him? If we were to cause a financial crisis of some sort, it could destabilize Hulk's grip on the Empire's military." He looks to Addison. "Perhaps we could turn some of the military against him, enough to execute your fishhook maneuver and keep his forces busy while more of us slip into his court? If your...ahem, Hulkster...were to challenge Hulk in the aftermath, as Lilandra's champion..." He considers a moment.

Lilandra speaks next. "We already have a mole on her way inside the Hulk's inner circle, posing as a bounty hunter."

Hook snaps his fingers and smiles. "If she sabotages the security inside Hulk's throneroom, all of us - my Exiles, our waylaid guests, and your Weapon X team - could get inside along with Gladiator and neutralize the Shi'ar Guardsmen who have decided to pledge loyalty to the usurper." He looks to the Hulkster. "If we broadcast the fight between you and the Hulk...And if you win...It could lead to Lilandra being recrowned." He looks to Lilandra, and then to X and Addison. "What say you to this plan?"

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer




Hogan's thick blonde eyebrows squeezed together beneath his red and yellow bandana. He stroked his signature Hulkastache, showing he was deep in thought.

"Well, you know, we really don't know what we're dealing with here..." he growled, "because we just might blow the whole planet up, you know. Everybody knows that Hulkamania is the strongest force in this universe. When I hit that ring, and there's a whole other universe of Hulkamania out there, well, we're in uncharted waters, brother! But I'm gonna put all those Hulkamaniacs in the crowd on my back and start dog paddling to shore as this other guy gets swept out to sea!"

His breaths were coming faster and his eyes were wide as he continued. "I'm gonna fight him, and I'm not just gonna fight him for this title!" He pointed to Lilandra on the screen, "Because she is now my manager, and I am fighting for the honor of the lovely Miss Lilandra, brother! I'm gonna do whatever it takes to set things right, dude. I'm ready to unleash 24 inches of python power on him, and once I hit him with the big boot and the big leg, it'll be a 1-2-3 for that nasty jerk!"

Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?
Agent Addison
PP: 2 XP: 6 Stress: Physical d6

"If I'm understanding this correctly... Let me be clear here. I've fought Hulks and tyrants before, but never with this little support. At the very least, I have always had a Helicarrier to return to and an army of fellow agents at my back. We don't have that here. We're on our own, attempting a precision strike against a cosmic-scale military. Even if we succeed, enough Guardsmen may not recognize Lilliandra as the rightful empress. The risks here are incalculable."

"But that does not mean we shouldn't try. It means we should try as hard as we can, because if SHIELD has taught me one thing it is that you need to take a million-to-one chance even if everything fails if you don't succeed. In fact, those are the times you need to take them the most. Captain, X, this decision is ultimately yours. If you choose not to take this opportunity, I will follow your orders. But Mr Hogan sounds certain he can handle it, and I believe we can too."

This may qualify me for "1XP when you talk about how much better your home dimension was."

CaptainCarrot
Jun 9, 2010
Venom

Felicia's head is fairly spinning. She's been a little confused ever since she woke up with Madame Web and the rest of her new team, but this is different. Assassinations and other wetwork, and apparently there was some high-level betrayal going on. Not to mention that they were fighting against not some terrible natural disaster, but an omnicidal nihilist maniac. The politics of the new arrangement, as well as the mission, just baffle her.

"I don't understand what's going on. But I'll follow Addison and X. Just tell me who needs a dressing-down, when the time comes."

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

Lilandra watches Hogan with curious interest, visibly trying to decode much of his speech in vain. Once he declares her his manager, however, she obviously is back on familiar ground. She smiles imperiously, "We accept your fealty, and your oath. You are an honorary Imperial Guardsman, effective immediately. We thank you for your pledge to protect Our people, and Our universe."

That's right - Hulkamania just found a new stable!

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer




"All right, Hulkamaniacs!" Hogan said, "I'm ready to rock! When these size 13 wrestling boots hit the ground of that planet, that Hulk is gonna have hell to pay! Just point me at him!"

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

Hook ends the transmission fairly quickly and sets about planning. Working with X, Addison, and the Doctor, they devise a strategy - a heist, as it were. Hook explains the plan to the assembled Exiles and Weapon X-ers.

"As our esteemed colleague, Mr. Franklin, explained. Every empire must have financial backing. A treasury to spend on soldiers, ships, and armaments. Supply lines and logistics to keep them paid and supplied. And accountants to keep track of it all." He smiles wickedly. "This is how the Shi'ar Empire will be made vulnerable, a tactical strike against their weakest flank. Their economy. Cut their supply lines off and their armies will go into chaos. Only those ships secured at the homeworld will be kept in line, if all goes smoothly." He clears his throat, showing images on the viewscreen of the ship to act as visual aids. A ring world is shown, and Hook gestures towards it. "This, my friends, is Nam'taath. The intergalactic bank. This is where the economies of the universe live, on one of the most heavily-secured, heavily-equipped, and heavily-fortified worlds in existence." He looks around, a devilish look in his eyes. "And we're going to rob it."

He looks at each of the interdimensional fugitives in turn, checking for any signs of fear or hesitation. "We have discussed the capabilities of all of our members, and come up with a plan utilizing our unique abilities. Barda, Doom, Venom, and Hulk. You will be the muscle. We need to make it look like we're breaking in to the Kree Empire's vaults through brute force, to attract security and divert attention from our true goal. X will be attempting to defeat a lone security droid, thus absorbing its abilities and access codes. Once that is done, X, Magneto, and the Doctor will make their way to the Shi'ar section of the ring world, where they will introduce some chaos into the Shi'ar's systems, diverting funds and sowing the seeds for economic collapse. Benjamin Franklin, Addison, Fury, and myself will disguise ourselves as Kree operatives, and collect our subdued comrades," he gestures towards Barda, Doom, Venom, and Hulk, "who will surrender themselves to the authorities when their rampage 'fails'. Once we have them in our custody, we will rendezvous back here at the ship. Darkman shall keep in communication with us, and monitor our progress in order to coordinate our movements."

The Captain takes in a long, slow breath. "Right. Any questions?"

CaptainCarrot
Jun 9, 2010
Venom

Felicia can work with that mission, though with a few tweaks it might really play to her strengths.

"That sounds good - what's the exact goal for my team? Is the "yeah, we're totally breaking into the bank" facade useful in itself, or just a good way of keeping eyes on us? If it's the latter, I don't have a counter-proposal per se, but it gives me more room to work with. I can keep everyone listening to me and focused on my monologue, and flowing with the crowd will keep that going longer."

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

Hook looks to Felicia and responds, "The latter was our thought - your job is to be as big, noisy, and dangerous as possible. You're a distraction, one that security cannot ignore."

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer




Hogan nodded thoughtfully. "Well you know something, I'm not much for crime. I've always been on the up and up, dude, I've always been about telling those little Hulksters out there about the three demandments, about the training, the prayers and the vitamins, and doing a crime just isn't something I'm the right dude for, brother. But lemme tell you something, I know a guy who can help us out. I'm just gonna one thing first, though. I'm gonna need Big Barda to hit me really hard, then we can get this on the road!"

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

Barda looks excited for a moment, but then regains her composure. She looks to Captain Hook, as if waiting for him to stop her, but he just shrugs. Smiling wickedly, she tosses her Mega Rod in her hand before charging forward suddenly and ferociously to wallop the Hulkster hard across his midsection. The force of the blow is enough to push the good Doctor onto the floor as he gives a wide-eyed, shocked expression.

Defiance Industries
Jul 22, 2010

A five-star manufacturer


Hogan braced himself and took the blow full on to the chest. He held perfectly still for a moment, then fell to his knees. Hulk Hogan clenched his fists and let out a roar of anger as he began to grow, and grow... and turn green. Suddenly, his clothes began changing color, going from his signature red and yellow look to a sinister black and white. When he looked up at them, he was no longer the very normal-looking and reasonably-sized 6'6" with 28 inch biceps and skin the color of hot dogs. No, he was a vivid emerald green and his arms were now the size of a normal person's waist. He had become... HOLLYWOOD HOGAN.



"Looks like it's time for me to take over," Hollywood said, his voice a booming bass that rumbled out from his chest every time he spoke. "If you want someone who knows how to take money, I should tell you all some time about how me and the New World Order got into Trillionaire Ted's checkbook. But in the mean time, you all can follow MY lead once we hit the ground, dude. I just gotta make sure to stay mad until then so that other guy doesn't come back. He'll just want to talk to you about milk or the days of the week or something."

He flexed his massive hands with a grin, then undid his championship belt from around his waist and began playing it like a guitar. It too had changed; somehow, when no one was looking, the letters "nWo" had been crudely scrawled on the front of the majestic gold belt with what looked like black spraypaint.

So I will be starting the action scene at D8 stress, the floor for being Hollywood Hogan

Defiance Industries fucked around with this message at 06:07 on Mar 21, 2020

Tricky
Jun 12, 2007

after a great meal i like to lie on the ground and feel like garbage


Benjamin Franklin, Super Skrull
PP: 1 | XP: 0

Ben watches Hogan's transmogrification into the diabolical mean green king of the nWo with no little interest. He leans in a little closer to Big Barda and asks quietly, "So do you think that he does that every time he gets walloped, or is it just when absolute visions of beauty, like yourself, knock the sense out of him?"

The plan, of course, is eminently doable. Between his natural affinity for disguises, ability to become invisible if things go really poorly, and half-remembered infiltration training, he'd make a drat poor Skrull if he couldn't handle a little high stakes identity theft.

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

As the Hulkster starts to transform, Hook's hand instinctively goes for his phaser and Barda clenches her hands around the Mega Rod as she watches his skin turn green. But both of them relax after a moment - after all, they had met alternate universe Hulks before in their travels. Hook shakes his head. "Well that is...a surprise." He gives a strange smile.

As Benjamin Franklin leans in to Barda, she speaks without looking to him, "Remember my words before, statesman, or we shall see whether you turn green when I hit you, too." She looks to him then, a devilish grin on her face as she turns and walks away.

Lurks With Wolves
Jan 14, 2013

At least I don't dance with them, right?
Agent Addison
PP: 2 XP: 7 Stress: Physical d6

Of course he's literally a Hulk. Of course... No, no, it's fine. She has to focus on the mission anyway.

"Now, Captain..." Addison sidles around the table until she's on the same side of the holographic display as Hook and away from the Hulk-Franklin-Barda triad. "How exactly will we be disguising ourselves as Shi'ar guards? Will this be your standard uniform swap, or something more complicated."

She continues, under her breath. "And I assume the empress won't notice if we skim some seed resources off the top while we work?"

Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

Bookkeeping Post

The Starjammer

"The Kree come in two varieties, as I'm sure most of you know. Some within their society have humanish skin tones, and others have skin in shades of blue. Fortunately, this should make it at least somewhat uncomplicated for us to disguise ourselves physically. If any of you have the ability to spontaneously turn blue, all the better." He looks to the Genie with a grin, who has moved to the background to watch the teams. "We'll want to do a uniform swap, which should be somewhat easy considering some of the pilfered Shi'ar technology on our ship. The Shi'ar have a device that manufactures any clothes you can dream up and program into it, of which we can take full advantage."

The Doctor pipes up then, "We may need some way to fool genetic signatures as well, I'll...work on that. But there may be other security precautions of which we're not aware. You may simply need to do a bit of improvisation, for which I'm sure you are more than prepared."

As Addison mutters about needing resources for going rogue, Genie adopts a thoughtful pose before gliding over to her. "Listen, I don't know how the other guides will react to this plan, or how they'll react to my departure. I set some things in motion when I left that I'm hoping will keep them distracted and off our trail for a while, but we're heading into the unknown. Fortunately, I know a thing or two about a thing or two," he gestures to the Tallus on X's hand, and the matching one with the good Captain. "As far as I'm concerned, when this mission is over, I'll take over for Webb and the others if need be to see that we get this thing figured out, and get you all home. I'm part of the reason you all got roped into this, least I can do is help you get out."

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Lager
Mar 9, 2004

Give me the secret to the anti-puppet equation!

ATTENTION: The game is moving to Discord, effective immediately. I have not idea if anyone has been lurking this thread, or if any of my players haven't seen the announcement in our Discord. Discord link: https://discord.gg/cAqWQU4

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