DLI is the sperg capital of the world

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > DLI is the sperg capital of the world

Slippery: May 16, 2004; Muscles Boxcar

Tokan posted:

They shouldn't have to be in the grey area about it. So many cases would be nonexistent (esp. for E-3 and below) if SECNAV made it clear that testing was available for it vs. infusing a false bravado in potential users about its testability.

I still raise the BS flag on this one; there's no real accountability to the 'rumor' until SECNAV posts an official statement on the testability instead of ducking and weaving direct questions regarding it. There are two recent accounts (May and June) of discharges from my last command wherein both had succumbed to the 'CO sends the results to UCLA' rumor. Turns out neither had popped positive, but there had been statements from a few whistleblowers. After drilling it in their heads for a couple weeks that they were doomed, they both gave admissions and were subsequently booted, w/o physical evidence (don't know if the June guy is still there).

Funny part? Afterwards, the 'rumor' spread that they had both popped positive; only those attending the mast knew the truth of the matter. Incidentally, neither of these two masts were announced, resulting in significantly fewer attendees than usual; the previous five masts this year were all announced, with junior enlisted being encouraged to attend.

The same command (a hospital, mind you) gave drug tests on a biweekly basis, as spice has been a continuing, though apparently untestable, problem there.

Not officially closing the book on this one (I could be wrong), but it just sounds like your typical RUMINT/PSYOPS disbursed down from the chain until they can find a proven way to test that can be stamped and sealed to put TFOG in the junkies.

Spice is against the rules. What more needs to be said? Why should the chain of command go out of its way to prove or disprove anything? It's illegal. Don't do it, or if you're gonna do it, understand the consequences.

I mean maybe I'm missing something here but it sounds like you're unhappy that the command hasn't made it 100% clear as to whether testing works for spice or not. Why should they? If you know it's not OK and you do it, and you get busted, I mean it's on you, after all.

Again I got nothing against spice et al. personally but it's illegal so what is there to even discuss?

# ? Jul 16, 2010 16:45

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 07:07

Tokan: Jul 13, 2010

Slippery posted:

I mean maybe I'm missing something here but it sounds like you're unhappy that the command hasn't made it 100% clear as to whether testing works for spice or not.

I wouldn't say missing something, but certainly adding something based on the tone and focus of your post. I'd be outside of the demographic that you're delivering your PSA to.

Slippery posted:

Why should they? If you know it's not OK and you do it, and you get busted, I mean it's on you, after all.

Good example right there. Right message, wrong recipient.

Slippery" posted:

Again I got nothing against spice et al. personally but it's illegal so what is there to even discuss?

You don't have to agree with my perception of the entire spice ordeal or my opinion of why SECNAV hasn't issued a solid statement regarding testing capabilities. The issue brought up was its testability, not the service(wo)man's choice to use or the Navy's legal stance on it.

Tokan fucked around with this message at 17:04 on Jul 16, 2010

# ? Jul 16, 2010 17:02

GetHardHero: Apr 16, 2007; I am gun down your faces

Spice has to be the lamest poo poo ever. I can't even imagine spending a year and a half learning a language only to get kicked out for smoking fake weed.

edit:whoops sorry tables

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GetHardHero fucked around with this message at 17:26 on Jul 16, 2010

# ? Jul 16, 2010 17:24

Tokan: Jul 13, 2010

^ Could not agree more.

# ? Jul 16, 2010 17:36

QingLaiXiguaba: Apr 4, 2010

There's really no excuse, and the only people I've seen get caught smoking it got caught by being completely stupid, not because they were picked up in a random piss test or anything like that.

What I don't get is how these guys get to this point. Did anybody sign up for the military without knowing that there was going to be a mountain of restrictions on behavior that the average citizen isn't subject to?

Then again, the vast majority of underage drinking, smoking spice, assorted NJP'able offenses I've seen are from Marines who haven't started their class yet, so maybe it's just a bad case of idle hands.

# ? Jul 16, 2010 19:16

GetHardHero: Apr 16, 2007; I am gun down your faces

QingLaiXiguaba posted:

There's really no excuse, and the only people I've seen get caught smoking it got caught by being completely stupid, not because they were picked up in a random piss test or anything like that.

What I don't get is how these guys get to this point. Did anybody sign up for the military without knowing that there was going to be a mountain of restrictions on behavior that the average citizen isn't subject to?

Then again, the vast majority of underage drinking, smoking spice, assorted NJP'able offenses I've seen are from Marines who haven't started their class yet, so maybe it's just a bad case of idle hands.

Some are just poo poo bags like the spice girls who just keep getting in trouble. You graduating the 29th?

# ? Jul 16, 2010 19:32

Slippery: May 16, 2004; Muscles Boxcar

Tokan posted:

I wouldn't say missing something, but certainly adding something based on the tone and focus of your post. I'd be outside of the demographic that you're delivering your PSA to.

It's not a PSA it's just a note that it doesn't matter whether they can or can't test or what they do or don't say. Do that poo poo, get caught, get booted, no point in trying to discuss it really, is what I meant.

quote:

You don't have to agree with my perception of the entire spice ordeal or my opinion of why SECNAV hasn't issued a solid statement regarding testing capabilities. The issue brought up was its testability, not the service(wo)man's choice to use or the Navy's legal stance on it.

Who cares whether SECNAV issues a statement or not? Who cares if the test is easy or hard or even possible? Why is that even relevant to the rule?

# ? Jul 16, 2010 20:47

Tokan: Jul 13, 2010

Slippery posted:

Who cares whether SECNAV issues a statement or not? Who cares if the test is easy or hard or even possible? Why is that even relevant to the rule?

Heh, um..

No one said it was, because (once again) the rule wasn't the issue in contention; testability was. When you decided otherwise is beyond me.

GHH - The spice girls? Are they getting booted for what it sounds like they're doing?

Xing - Idle hands sounds about right. Friend of mine in the Corps was 'punished' for tampering with the radio equipment at Goodfellow by being given desk orders to Meade. He hated life, never having gotten to hit the field, and left instead of reupping at his EAOS with a bitter attitude towards the service.

Do they still send you leathernecks over to Goodfellow after DLI? I know they changed it for us squids some time back.

# ? Jul 16, 2010 21:17

Slippery: May 16, 2004; Muscles Boxcar

Tokan posted:

Heh, um..

No one said it was, because (once again) the rule wasn't the issue in contention; testability was. When you decided otherwise is beyond me.

Who cares if it's testable? (although it is)

# ? Jul 16, 2010 21:19

Tokan: Jul 13, 2010

Slippery posted:

(although it is)

Sorry. Calling the BS card on this one.

It's about as factual as 'stress cards' being offered in boot camp.

Tokan fucked around with this message at 00:04 on Jul 17, 2010

# ? Jul 16, 2010 22:00

LFoD: Jul 26, 2009; by Tiny Fistpump

What about Old Spice?

Also, still cant test for Salvia. So dont get busted for possession.

# ? Jul 16, 2010 22:35

GetHardHero: Apr 16, 2007; I am gun down your faces

The spice girls are indeed some marine dudes getting the boot for spice.

# ? Jul 16, 2010 22:47

Stevia Prefontane: Feb 13, 2008

420 smoke fake drugs every day

# ? Jul 17, 2010 02:14

Slippery: May 16, 2004; Muscles Boxcar

Tokan posted:

Sorry. Calling the BS card on this one.

It's about as factual as 'stress cards' being offered in boot camp.

Spice is testable, but you know what? Don't take my word for it, just go do it every day!

(Why would I lie to you, I mean I don't have anything to gain or lose by your doing spice. Even my own guys, if they all wanna do spice the boss will kick them out, it's not like I'm gonna get demoted if everyone I know does spice...)

Slippery fucked around with this message at 02:17 on Jul 17, 2010

# ? Jul 17, 2010 02:15

new friend from school: May 19, 2008; by Azathoth

Tokan posted:

GHH - The spice girls? Are they getting booted for what it sounds like they're doing?

They call them that because there were four of them getting adseped, and it all started with the carful of them getting caught with spice and a bong in the front seat, at the front gate; none of them are actually female, or gay, or anything like that. It is also worth noting that their company first sergeant (who happened to be staff duty that day, which is same as an OOD) was in a car DIRECTLY BEHIND THEIRS.

# ? Jul 17, 2010 02:19

GetHardHero: Apr 16, 2007; I am gun down your faces

Slippery posted:

Spice is testable, but you know what? Don't take my word for it, just go do it every day!

(Why would I lie to you, I mean I don't have anything to gain or lose by your doing spice. Even my own guys, if they all wanna do spice the boss will kick them out, it's not like I'm gonna get demoted if everyone I know does spice...)

Slippery we are all aware of your one man war on spice. Shooting up head shops, petitioning local and federal governments to ban the stuff. Blowing up cigarette boats from Cuba smuggling the poo poo in. Tokan doesn't know, he doesn't know about what spice did to your brother man...

# ? Jul 17, 2010 03:08

GreenMeat: Sep 2, 2002; slow mutant

So, who was the student that got clocked in the head with a beer bottle by that wannabe hippy?

# ? Jul 17, 2010 03:15

hammeredspace: Jun 22, 2008; I produce infinite faggotry

Jedi mind tricks? Seriously?

Slippery posted:

Spice is testable, but you know what? Don't take my word for it, just go do it every day!

Seems the way to actually find out is obtain a urine test and test yourself - or preferably a civilian who has nothing to lose over the matter.

Like test him a few times and if the results are consistent, one way or the other, we'll then know for sure.

hammeredspace fucked around with this message at 16:10 on Jul 17, 2010

# ? Jul 17, 2010 16:07

Secret Spoon: Mar 22, 2009

hammeredspace posted:

Jedi mind tricks? Seriously?

Seems the way to actually find out is obtain a urine test and test yourself - or preferably a civilian who has nothing to lose over the matter.

Like test him a few times and if the results are consistent, one way or the other, we'll then know for sure.

I forgot what chemical they test for, but it's not shipped to the regular testing site. Random batches from commands are sent to some company in Cali, I'll get that information on Monday.

# ? Jul 17, 2010 18:09

Comradephate: Feb 28, 2009; College Slice

hammeredspace posted:

Seems the way to actually find out is obtain a urine test and test yourself - or preferably a civilian who has nothing to lose over the matter.

Like test him a few times and if the results are consistent, one way or the other, we'll then know for sure.

or... just don't join the military if you want to spend your time doing drugs. (Which is completely fine) But really, there's no argument here. It's not like in civilian life where you are born into these laws and there's realistically nothing you can do about it. When joining, people have to consciously accept these rules, and say that they understand them.

Just don't do it. Doesn't matter if they can test for it.

# ? Jul 17, 2010 21:05

GreenMeat: Sep 2, 2002; slow mutant

Comradephate posted:

or... just don't join the military if you want to spend your time doing drugs. (Which is completely fine) But really, there's no argument here. It's not like in civilian life where you are born into these laws and there's realistically nothing you can do about it. When joining, people have to consciously accept these rules, and say that they understand them.

Just don't do it. Doesn't matter if they can test for it.

Well said. There's that little oath we all took. Nobody forces you to raise your hand and mumble "...I will obey the orders of...the officers appointed over me..."

# ? Jul 18, 2010 00:22

rossmum: Dec 2, 2008; Cummander ross, reporting for duty!

Exactly. Too bad they'll still claim everything from ignorance to blue murder just to try and save their sorry arses when they do something incredibly dumb.

# ? Jul 18, 2010 00:41

Tokan: Jul 13, 2010

In the case of the Navy, ignorance won't work at all. As per NAVADMIN 108/10, issued March 2010:

"PER REFS A AND B, DRUG ABUSE INCLUDES THE WRONGFUL USE,
POSSESSION, MANUFACTURE, OR DISTRIBUTION OF A CONTROLLED SUBSTANCE.
DRUG ABUSE ALSO INCLUDES THE UNLAWFUL USE OF CONTROLLED SUBSTANCE
ANALOGUES (DESIGNER DRUGS), NATURAL SUBSTANCES (E.G., FUNGI,
EXCRETIONS), CHEMICALS (E.G., CHEMICALS WRONGFULLY USED AS
INHALANTS), PROPELLANTS AND/OR PRESCRIBED OR OVER-THE-COUNTER DRUGS OR
PHARMACEUTICAL COMPOUNDS WITH THE INTENT TO INDUCE INTOXICATION,
EXCITEMENT, OR STUPEFACTION OF THE CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM, AND WILL
SUBJECT THE VIOLATOR TO PUNITIVE ACTION UNDER THE UCMJ AND/OR ADVERSE
ADMINISTRATIVE ACTION. EXAMPLES OF OTHER SUBSTANCES, THE WRONGFUL
USE OF WHICH CONSTITUTES DRUG ABUSE, INCLUDES, BUT IS NOT LIMITED TO
THE FOLLOWING:
A. PRODUCTS THAT CONTAIN SYNTHETIC CANNABINOID COMPOUNDS, SUCH AS
SPICE, GENIE, BLAZE, DREAM, EX-SES, SPARK, FUSION, DARK KNIGHT,
YUKATAN FIRE, AND K2.
B. NATURAL SUBSTANCES SUCH AS SALVIA DIVINORUM AND MUSHROOMS.
C. COMMON ITEMS ABUSED BY INHALING OR HUFFING, SUCH AS DUST OFF,
GLUE, PAINT THINNER AND GASOLINE.
D. OVER-THE-COUNTER PRODUCTS SUCH AS ROBITUSSIN AND CORICIDIN HBP.
E. PRESCRIPTION MEDICATIONS SUCH AS OXYCODONE, VICODIN, ADDERAL, AND
VALIUM."

# ? Jul 18, 2010 02:32

Stevia Prefontane: Feb 13, 2008

Can we go back to talking about the spergers on post?

# ? Jul 18, 2010 02:52

ManMythLegend: Aug 18, 2003; I don't believe in anything, I'm just here for the violence.

Milkhaver1984 posted:

Can we go back to talking about the spergers on post?

I'm pretty sure they've been posting in this thread for the last few pages.

# ? Jul 18, 2010 04:30

Dirk Digglet: Aug 17, 2009; When I close my eyes, I see this thing, a sign, I see this name in bright blue neon lights with a purple outline

GreenMeat posted:

So, who was the student that got clocked in the head with a beer bottle by that wannabe hippy?

http://www.truecrimereport.com/2010/07/tyler_tirado_moron_of_the_day.php

more on the story here. no names or branches though

# ? Jul 18, 2010 04:46

GreenMeat: Sep 2, 2002; slow mutant

Dirk Digglet posted:

http://www.truecrimereport.com/2010/07/tyler_tirado_moron_of_the_day.php

more on the story here. no names or branches though

That's the story that prompted me to ask the question...

# ? Jul 18, 2010 06:29

QingLaiXiguaba: Apr 4, 2010

In a stroke of brilliance, one of the aforementioned spice girls earned himself a second NJP last weekend.

As I understand it, somebody in the Army started ripping him for being in the Air Force. Granted, he's a Marine, but for reasons unknown he decided it would be a good idea to roll with it, proceeding to become very defensive about being in the Air Force and escalating it to violence. In the end, he and another Marine left the place in handcuffs, and at some point the soldier bit a guy in the head.

Take that all with a grain of salt though. I'm patching the story together from details I've gotten from multiple sources. The saddest part of the whole thing is that this happened at the on-base BOSS installation, without the aid of alcohol.

# ? Jul 18, 2010 07:34

Tokan: Jul 13, 2010

... Jesus Christ, what the Hell kind of a place am I going to?!

Do all of these asshats prefer to stay -inside- base or outside of Monterey on their liberty, or am I just going to have to rent a semi-permanent hostel in San Cruz/Jose/Fran for the weekends if I want any semblance of a decent nightlife?

# ? Jul 18, 2010 09:21

GetHardHero: Apr 16, 2007; I am gun down your faces

There is no night life here unless you like kareoke and gay hand jobs or sex with ugly army chicks (milkhaver1984 being the exception

) and this is a sperg story thread not a spice thread if you ladies want to talk about spice make a spice thread.

GetHardHero fucked around with this message at 20:36 on Jul 18, 2010

# ? Jul 18, 2010 09:47

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

I was there a long time ago and there wasn't poo poo to do in town at night except drink. It sounds like it hasn't changed much...

Are the brothels still in operation? I was married at the time so I wasn't tempted, but the Air Force (mainly officers) was always getting busted with prostitutes.

# ? Jul 18, 2010 12:18

dividebyzero: Jun 26, 2006; by angerbot

hammeredspace posted:

No, who I refer to was this weird, mousy little sailor girl who'd wander the barracks with a stuffed cat toy and do the strangest poo poo. Among them I personally witnessed:

- Having entire conversations with herself in the laundry rooms. Once on the first deck, second on the male deck.

- Dropping to her stomach in formation and licking the ground, and then popping back up to attention like it never happened.

- Asking people to talk to her stuffed cat, with her acting as the median between the two.

- Yep, she'd walking around making goddamn cat noises.

- Eating leaf after leaf of paper.

And lots of other stuff which, if not having seen the aforementioned, I would never believe. Here's the kicker: She was a stellar linguist. I mean there's some sort of mental disability going on with this chick, no doubt, but it's the kind that lets her excel in certain areas. That's the only reason they kept her around: the vain hope she'd turn around, drop this bullshit and kick the DLPT5's rear end.

She had been there for months before I showed up, and was there for months after I got out a year later, and it seemed to me that she just might become a set piece, another strange feature of 551.

I was there for one of their many meth busts. It was an airman; had a mini-meth kitchen in his wall locker.

I remember walking to the chow hall for lunch because the buses weren't in service - later I would find out because of the meth bust - and there were dozens of police running around, several with dogs, and officers and senior enlisted in a goddamn tizzy. It was weird, to say the least. Anyone who bothered to ask anyone anything was told to shut the hell up and go back to class.

Dunno what happened to the airman but it's not hard to imagine. Lotta drug-related issues there; really surprising.

Sounds like you were there long after me (DLPT5), but 'navy cat girl' sounds an awful lot like an Ar-ling we had when I went through in 99-00. I thought she was kinda hot though because I had a thing for damaged nerdy chicks at the time.

rossmum posted:

Exactly. Too bad they'll still claim everything from ignorance to blue murder just to try and save their sorry arses when they do something incredibly dumb.

Hrrm, it's a thread about DLI spergers and someone, presumably an American, who unironically says 'arse'. Unless you correct yourself soon and don't think you'll be one of the wretches this thread was intended to document, then I have some bad news for you.

dividebyzero fucked around with this message at 05:00 on Jul 20, 2010

# ? Jul 20, 2010 04:54

dividebyzero: Jun 26, 2006; by angerbot

Tokan posted:

... Jesus Christ, what the Hell kind of a place am I going to?!

Do all of these asshats prefer to stay -inside- base or outside of Monterey on their liberty, or am I just going to have to rent a semi-permanent hostel in San Cruz/Jose/Fran for the weekends if I want any semblance of a decent nightlife?

Once you leave Monterey, you will spend the rest of your military career 1) wishing you were back in Monterey, 2) making deals with the devil (aka 'detailers') to get orders back to Monterey in some capacity. Don't gently caress around like I did, grousing about the aspies/the cost of living for an E-nothing in the Monterey Bay area;

Enjoy it while you again, because it is one hell of a great opportunity

# ? Jul 20, 2010 04:57

malikjahim: Jul 2, 2007; It can also be argued that DNA is nothing more than a program designed to preserve itself.

'05-'07, Army. PDLPT is where it's at.
Anybody spot crackheads on Ft. Ord? Never got the chance myself but a couple of buds had a detail down there and saw a good number.

# ? Jul 20, 2010 05:57

rossmum: Dec 2, 2008; Cummander ross, reporting for duty!

dividebyzero posted:

Hrrm, it's a thread about DLI spergers and someone, presumably an American, who unironically says 'arse'. Unless you correct yourself soon and don't think you'll be one of the wretches this thread was intended to document, then I have some bad news for you.

Try again.

:australia:

# ? Jul 20, 2010 06:39

Tokan: Jul 13, 2010

dividebyzero posted:

Once you leave Monterey, you will spend the rest of your military career 1) wishing you were back in Monterey, 2) making deals with the devil (aka 'detailers') to get orders back to Monterey in some capacity. Don't gently caress around like I did, grousing about the aspies/the cost of living for an E-nothing in the Monterey Bay area;

Enjoy it while you again, because it is one hell of a great opportunity

Will do. Already have a list of things I plan to get involved in when I arrive, and planning on taking it easy (nightlife-wise)the first few months just to get settled in to the area. Learned enough at the last command not to lose perspective and take things for granted.

Living off-base should make it easier too.

# ? Jul 20, 2010 07:28

Humbug Scoolbus: Apr 25, 2008; The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.; Clapping Larry

Tokan posted:

Will do. Already have a list of things I plan to get involved in when I arrive, and planning on taking it easy (nightlife-wise)the first few months just to get settled in to the area. Learned enough at the last command not to lose perspective and take things for granted.

Living off-base should make it easier too.

Living off-post helps immeasurably.

# ? Jul 20, 2010 10:52

GetHardHero: Apr 16, 2007; I am gun down your faces

Well took my final DLPT today. Either way I will be done with this place, hopefully I passed and can leave here a winner.

# ? Jul 21, 2010 01:16

Tokan: Jul 13, 2010

Good luck! I hope you do well.

What language did you test for, and was it the DLAB v.5? (not sure if it applies to all languages)

# ? Jul 21, 2010 04:10

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 07:07

hammeredspace: Jun 22, 2008; I produce infinite faggotry

GetHardHero posted:

Well took my final DLPT today. Either way I will be done with this place, hopefully I passed and can leave here a winner.

What; not even a chance of rolling you into Spanish?

# ? Jul 21, 2010 04:41

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