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thornghost posted:If SaviourX would just go ahead and declare Yeah, I'm anxious about my inevitable victory as well. I was working on a cover way back, but it wasn't going anywhere, I wasn't feeling it at all, so I put it aside and haven't touched it in forever. Ser Pounce on his noble rabbit steed is pretty awesome, though.
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Nov 2, 2012 19:58
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Can you imagine someone picking up the book based on the cover? The ultimate Wildcard.
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Nov 2, 2012 20:01
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Arbite posted:Uh, I finished Chapter 5 weeks ago. Oops, sorry. FIXED
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Nov 2, 2012 20:09
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I would hang that thing on my wall. It... wouldn't be out of place. I have some pretty weird cat art.
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Nov 2, 2012 20:16
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Shageletic posted:Can you imagine someone picking up the book based on the cover? The ultimate Wildcard. If we try to incorporate as many memes as possible into the cover art maybe we can draw the ironic internet crowd. You know, the kind of people who would leave this thing out on their coffee table because internet jokes are cool right now, not realizing that it's full of double-goatse and food-based sex.
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Nov 2, 2012 20:31
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Double-Goatse will be the next internet meme, mark my words.
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Nov 3, 2012 03:05
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I swear, if you absolute fuckers kick off some kind of terrible goatse arms race...
Liquid Communism fucked around with this message at 06:31 on Nov 5, 2012 |
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Nov 3, 2012 13:58
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That would be a great plot for the long-anticipated sci-fi sequel to the bestselling erotic novel A Game of Bones.
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Nov 3, 2012 15:59
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We didn't land on double-goatse, double-goatse LANDED ON US.
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Nov 3, 2012 16:02
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When the galactic conqueror Thrawnos comes to the world of Directionos looking for the Tesseract Goatse, nothing will ever be the same again.
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Nov 3, 2012 16:09
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Contra Calculus posted:Double-Goatse will be the next internet meme, mark my words. Why stop at just the internet? I find your lack of ambition disturbing.
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Nov 3, 2012 16:12
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A Game of Bones: Read now, my lord.
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Nov 3, 2012 17:10
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Beyond sane knolls posted:A Game of Bones: Read now, my lord. Quick, someone make an SA banner
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Nov 3, 2012 17:24
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A Game of Bones: The first (all original) erotic thriller by the people who brought you stealth spoilers in TVIV, horrible avatars, and GRRM fan art. Available now (incomplete) on google docs.
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Nov 3, 2012 18:11
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A GLISTENING HODOR posted:A Game of Bones: The first (all original) erotic thriller by the people who brought you stealth spoilers in TVIV, horrible avatars, and GRRM fan art. Unfinished and Uneditited, just like it's inspiration but clearly not stolen from "A Song of Ice and Fire" by George R. R. Martin.
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Nov 3, 2012 19:10
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Liquid Communism posted:I swear, if you absolute fuckers kick of some kind of terrible goatse arms race... All goatse is an arms race, you dont want one side to stretch further, equilateral stretch is necessary to achieve the Platonic Ideal Form of Goatse
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Nov 3, 2012 21:15
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Some sort of Mutual Anal Destruction.
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Nov 3, 2012 23:40
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Man, it was awesome when Mutual Anal Destruction opened for Mummer's Farce.
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Nov 4, 2012 00:06
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We can not allow a Goatse gap. It may seem like a stretch, but it shall ring true: the threat is spreading, and we are falling behind. If we don't act now this chasm will widen and create a gaping void that can not be filled.
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Nov 4, 2012 04:35
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We choose to goatse the moon. We choose to goatse the moon in this decade and tubgirl the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard, because that goatse will serve to organize and measure the best of our lemoncakes and absolute fuckers, because that paycheck is one that we are willing to collect, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win, and the others, too.
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Nov 4, 2012 04:45
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I have a dream that my four little tubgirls will be judged not by the color of their diarrhea, but by the circumference of their goatse.
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Nov 4, 2012 05:04
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What's he that stretches so? My cousin Kirk Johnson? No, my fair cousin; If we are marked to gape, we are enow To do our country loss; and if to spread, The greater gape, the greater share of honour. God's will! I pray thee, wish not one inch more. By Jove, I am not covetous for gold, Nor care I who doth gaze upon my anus; It yearns me not if men my rear end in a top hat gaze; Such outward things dwell not in my desires. But if it be a sin to covet honour, I am the most offending soul alive. No, faith, my coz, wish not a man from England. God's peace! I would not lose so great an honour As one inch more methinks would split me twain. For the best hope I have. O, do not wish one more! Rather proclaim it, Kirk Johnson, through my rear end, That he which hath no stomach to this gape, Let him depart; his back button shall be made, And cookies for this site put into his history; We would not gape in that man's company That fears his fellowship to gape with us. This day is called the feast of Goatse. He that outgapes this day, and comes safe home, Will stand a tip-toe when this day is named, And rouse him at the name of Goatse. He that shall spread anus this day, and see internet fame, Will yearly on the vigil feast his neighbours, And say "To-morrow is Saint Goatse's" Then will he strip his pants and show his rectum, And say "These prolapses I had on Goatse's day." Old men forget; yet all shall be forgot, But he'll remember, with advantages, What feats he did that day. Then shall our names, Familiar in his mouth as household words- Creamed Corn Guy, Girl of the Tub, Two Girls One Cup, Swap.avi and Lemonparty- Be in their flowing cups freshly remembered. This story shall the goat man teach his son; And Goatse.cx shall ne'er go by, From this day to the ending of the world, But we in it shall be remembered- We few, we happy few, we band of buttholes; For he to-day that gapes his anus with me Shall be my brother; be he ne'er so vile, This day his rear end be distended; And gentlemen in England now-a-bed Shall think themselves accursed they were not here, And hold their manhoods cheap whiles any speaks That gaped with us upon Saint Goatse's day. The Anime Liker fucked around with this message at 05:21 on Nov 4, 2012 |
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Nov 4, 2012 05:15
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A plug in both your goatses!
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Nov 4, 2012 05:20
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On First Looking into Goatman's rear end in a top hat Much have I throughout the Internet strolled, And many pornos and shock sites seen; Round many strange forums have I been Which bugchasers, bronies and tropers hold. Oft of one wide expanse had I been told That wide-cheeked goatman ruled as his demesne; Yet did I never breathe its pure serene Till I click'd a hyperlink, blue and bold: Then felt I like some baker of lamprey pies When a new eel swims into his den; Or like stout GRRM when with beady eyes He star'd at Emilia - and all his skin Began to sweat, down his meaty thighs Gasping, as he adjusts his hat again.
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Nov 4, 2012 06:35
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From the spoiler thread: hellbastard posted:A friend of mine typed 1000 different variations of Jon Snow only to find they were all taken when naming a character on SWTOR. He is understandably pissed off because his characters in computer games have all been named after the Stark children since Diablo 2. So every time he sees one of theses 'Johnsnoww' types he whispers them that Jon gets stabbed to death by the Nightswatch and dies at the end of the last book.
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Nov 5, 2012 05:25
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Everytime I see someone post a half assed Winter Is Coming meme or GoT youtube thing, or find someone's cutesy fuckin game mod only based on the show, I fight back the urge to spoil them, then let it fly.
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Nov 5, 2012 08:29
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Oh god, Sam's likely to be a POV character next novel. We're getting a new kid in school arc aren't we?
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Nov 5, 2012 10:09
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His arc in the fourth book ended exactly when it began to be interesting, so it will probably turn out to be lackluster after a decade of GRRM forgetting what the hell he was doing with those mages. Or turn into creepy grognard Harry Potter fanfic, I guess.
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Nov 5, 2012 10:45
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Arbite posted:Oh god, Sam's likely to be a POV character next novel. We're getting a new kid in school arc aren't we? Hahahaha "next novel."
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Nov 5, 2012 14:04
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ZearothK posted:His arc in the fourth book ended exactly when it began to be interesting, so it will probably turn out to be lackluster after a decade of GRRM forgetting what the hell he was doing with those mages. Or turn into creepy grognard Harry Potter fanfic, I guess. Oh God, that's why it's taken so long, that's what's holding him up. Each day GRRM rises from his slumber and a team of strapping, dusky Mexi-men pry him from his grease and sweat soaked bed with those boards they use to take pizzas out of ovens. He lurches to his weirdo Amiga or whatever the hell he writes on and plops down, a blank page marred only by SAM in bold at the top staring back at him. "The maesters are all male," he thinks to himself, "but I want Sam to rape a Hermione knockoff. I want him to bowl her over with his bulk and toss his belly on her back so he can reach her with his fat pink mast and his body slurps over hers stinking of body cheese while she cries and feebly fights to escape." Soon his thoughts turn from the writing itself to a flat blubbery mass violating a poor, helpless girl. Her pleas for mercy start as screams and fade to resigned sobbing and finally a dead eyed, violated acceptance as inexorably as the pudgy ruddy face of Samwell Tarly slowly becomes his own. At the end of the day he's merged with his chair, covered in a sheen of sweat and semen. He glistens. He dials J. K. Rowling's phone number, and breathes into the receiver until she hangs up. Still the cursor blinks. Nothing is written. Nothing. "Oh Hermione" he coos, as they wheel him abed.
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Nov 5, 2012 14:16
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If that story were true, I'd like to think that J.K. Rowling slept with GRRM maybe once at WorldCon or something while very drunk. It's something she regrets every day of her life, and that's why she doesn't block his number. She needs those creepy phone calls in the evening to remind her not to make the same mistake again. But it's wearing on her, oh is it wearing on her. She thinks sometimes that if GRRM were just gone altogether that things would be better. No one would miss him. She has billions of dollars, how hard could it be? From time to time she looks at the listing on her mobile phone for Ty. Ty, who owed her after that time in Prague. Ty, who could work quickly and quietly and cheaply. He was already so close to GRRM, his defenses would be down. He was the perfect man for the job. All she had to do was call him and say the word. Wire some money to a Swiss bank account. She knew she would call the number sooner or later, but when? When?
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Nov 5, 2012 17:23
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You're missing the most important detail. When he had Jo pressed up against the wall of the broom closet, each awkward hump emitting a hideous sound of slurping flesh and compressed air, he leaned close to her ear, as close as a man of his carriage could manage, anyway, and whispered "Hermione". That's all she hears now when her head hits the pillow. Not the marching of ants or slow breathing, hermione hermione hermione hermione
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Nov 5, 2012 17:30
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The Tychurian Candidate. Ty picks up the ringing phone. The earpiece whispers to him, "Valar Morghulis," and his eyes go hazy as he sets down the phone and opens the glass case within which rests a replica of Jon Snow's sword, Longclaw.
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Nov 5, 2012 17:32
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Would that be the Damascus replica, the standard replica, or the tv show replica? This is important.
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Nov 5, 2012 17:33
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The Bad Dragon replica. e: from the Valyriansteel.com page for Longclaw Zeke posted:Hung on my wall it has the effect of making me seem like a really cool person, and although I haven't yet tested the theory I suspect it will make picking up girls really easy. Blade_of_tyshalle fucked around with this message at 17:40 on Nov 5, 2012 |
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Nov 5, 2012 17:36
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Blade_of_tyshalle posted:The Bad Dragon replica. The only way to the GRRMs heart is through his butthole.
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Nov 5, 2012 17:46
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Depending on how he's positioned and what he's wearing that may actually be the shortest path.
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Nov 5, 2012 17:54
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Shortest, yes, but completely blocked up with miniature Dany figurines covered in Dominos grease.
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Nov 5, 2012 18:15
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Beyond sane knolls posted:Shortest, yes, but completely blocked up with miniature Dany figurines covered in Dominos grease.  Poor, poor Ty.
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Nov 5, 2012 18:20
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Beyond sane knolls posted:Shortest, yes, but completely blocked up with miniature Dany figurines covered in Dominos grease. It's late at night. The air is damp with old sweat and a stench of finger foods and necrotic flesh hangs over everything. From the chambers comes the tinny ringing of a bell muffled by the meaty paws of its ringer. A boyish, giggling voice cries out with its mouth full of melted cheese and processed meat products: "Ty, I need unblocking! Poopies!" The broken and exhausted manservant rolls a rubber glove up to his shoulder and shambles lifelessly to his master's bedchamber.
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Nov 5, 2012 18:26
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