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That was quite the literary experience. I'm amazed. I have never read anything so unabashedly despicable, so abysmally written, or so breathtakingly incompetent. Joseph, I commend you for your titanic efforts. It must have taken all your strength not to hurl her piece of poo poo story out the window.
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Jul 25, 2013 19:55
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I just realized. I just realized that the goddamn seats are biological. And the wheels. They're And oh god which one of you is this? 
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Jul 25, 2013 20:48
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Vonder posted:I kind of like his little wrist things, though. I'm more concerned about the skulls and bones on the floor. What did they come from? And why does the ribcage on the right seem to defy the laws of perspective?
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Jul 25, 2013 21:09
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Tardigrade posted:The roller-coaster-track-with-loop-the-loop-design could almost be a legitimate pattern for arm jewelry. They don't really seem like the bones of amy of the rides, which doesn't do much for his "bloodthirsty" appearance (not to mention Railrunner literally thirsts for blood throughout the novel, so really that term applies to our "hero" more than anything else). Ironwheel seems to just be kind of untidy. Maybe he should hire a better janitor or something.
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Jul 25, 2013 22:59
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Seriously, WTF? A book about anthropomorphic roller-coasters? What kind of drivel is this?  Although it's a creative concept, it also proves my theory that anything that's not human or animal shaped made anthro becomes creepy as gently caress. wafflemoose fucked around with this message at 05:29 on Jul 26, 2013 |
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Jul 26, 2013 01:24
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You know what's funny? If Railrunner didn't have that bullshit magic potion, he would have been another notch on Ironwheel's belt. The dude is badass enough to take down Mary Sue coasters time and time again.quote:He is truly a monster indeed, feeding on suffering - and sometimes his servants if he feels like it. Ironwheel is a large, black roller coaster whose face is painted to resemble his skull and his metal and leather is torn and scarred from past encounters with reds, who unfortunately lost their match with the leader of the Fallen race. Bloodthirsty is perhaps the best definition to describe him. He vile, ferocious, and will seek to kill anyone or anything that disagrees or goes against him. Ironwheel is one formidable opponent indeed.  There is no loving  big enough for this book.
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Jul 26, 2013 03:19
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Tardigrade posted:I'm more concerned about the skulls and bones on the floor. What did they come from? And why does the ribcage on the right seem to defy the laws of perspective? Those skeletons are cracking me up. Apparently amusement park rides have Flintstones bones.
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Jul 26, 2013 04:03
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SSNeoman posted:You know what's funny? If Railrunner didn't have that bullshit magic potion, he would have been another notch on Ironwheel's belt. The dude is badass enough to take down Mary Sue coasters time and time again.  Sadly Photoshop had difficulties with my 39304x28900 image with three layers of recursion so you'll have to settle for two.
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Jul 26, 2013 04:19
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Djeser posted:
Spare no expense in mocking Miranda and her story. I like that approach. I'm inspired to write some fanfiction of my own while we wait for the next installment of this execrable series.
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Jul 26, 2013 14:37
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In current news, the City of Xzerma has been renamed to Xanadu, Merrylegs is not wearing "a cloak that looked like it was from India. It was red and yellow with patterns all over the fabric." And Miranda has drawn actual background this time. Is there any vanishing point there? And oh god there is so much more wrong with this picture.
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Jul 27, 2013 00:15
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She dumped all her skill points into crosshatching.
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Jul 27, 2013 02:45
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Why is Railrunner wearing an Organization XIII jumpsuit from Kingdom Hearts?
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Jul 27, 2013 03:33
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SSNeoman posted:Why is Railrunner wearing an Organization XIII jumpsuit from Kingdom Hearts? So you can't tell he's red! 
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Jul 27, 2013 04:07
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Oh hey, coaster-tails are now completely gone, not even added in the background at the last second.
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Jul 27, 2013 05:50
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YellerBill posted:Oh hey, coaster-tails are now completely gone, not even added in the background at the last second. I think wheel-fingers might be gone too. Good to see that bumpecar-stings are still present though.
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Jul 27, 2013 09:40
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NEW SKILL ACQUIRED: retractable buttcars
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Jul 27, 2013 10:10
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Angrymog posted:I think wheel-fingers might be gone too. Good to see that bumpecar-stings are still present though. Yes, and you would think that wheel-less hands would be easier for Miranda to draw.  However, they are not. Look at that thing. Where the hell are the fingers going?
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Jul 27, 2013 10:27
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You can see his mouth, too. "Gee, I wonder what colo-- oh it's a red."
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Jul 27, 2013 13:40
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crowfeathers posted:Yes, and you would think that wheel-less hands would be easier for Miranda to draw.
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Jul 27, 2013 14:25
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Iced Cocoa posted:In current news, the City of Xzerma has been renamed to Xanadu, Merrylegs is not wearing "a cloak that looked like it was from India. It was red and yellow with patterns all over the fabric." And Miranda has drawn actual background this time. Is there any vanishing point there? And oh god there is so much more wrong with this picture. I'm not an artist, but something about the background makes it look like it's been painted on a wall. Is it the lack of shadow? Shouldn't the stuff in the far back be darker than the stuff further forward?
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Jul 27, 2013 18:53
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hyperhazard posted:I'm not an artist, but something about the background makes it look like it's been painted on a wall. Is it the lack of shadow? Shouldn't the stuff in the far back be darker than the stuff further forward? I think it's the lack of shadow, especially compared to the foreground.  I am critiquing artwork of sentient amusement park attractions. What am I doing with my life.
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Jul 27, 2013 23:25
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YellerBill posted:I think it's the lack of shadow, especially compared to the foreground. Also the fact that the perspective makes no logical sense, which makes it look flat, so without any shadow or fog or perspective to add depth it all looks like a painted-on backdrop.
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Jul 27, 2013 23:49
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Djeser posted:Also the fact that the perspective makes no logical sense, which makes it look flat, so without any shadow or fog or perspective to add depth it all looks like a painted-on backdrop. Yeah, the stones on the ground make the rollercoasters??? in the back look about the size of Static in comparison.
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Jul 27, 2013 23:56
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Which would be perfect if this were a picture from Bobbin's So, I decided to spend some time figuring out how tall Merrylegs is compared to Railrunner there. What we know is that Railrunner stands 17 feet tall.  So with that, I've found another picture of Merrylegs at comparable angle to figure out where both of them stand. The Red line is 17 feet, and it's 1065 pixels. before I resized for internet display Merrylegs at the shoulder is 525 pixels. So, 525/1065 = 47%, so Merrylegs is just under half of Railrunner's size. So Merrylegs is about 8'4.5", or just about 25 hands. The tallest horse in recent history was 21.2 hands. loving hell Miranda, scale sheet. It's important. Scale sheet and character sheets. Iced Cocoa fucked around with this message at 03:44 on Jul 28, 2013 |
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Jul 28, 2013 00:22
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Second part is in the pot and cooking, ready to open on Monday. Are you afraid? You will be. You will be. Bobbin Threadbare fucked around with this message at 01:11 on Jul 28, 2013 |
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Jul 28, 2013 01:09
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Sir, I'll have you know I won't fear it until the moment it descends upon me, for I can forget things from this thread until my next return to the thread.  I also may have bad enough taste to enjoy a dramatic reading of a thing I didn't enjoy directly.
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Jul 28, 2013 04:04
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YellerBill posted:Oh hey, coaster-tails are now completely gone, not even added in the background at the last second. There is nothing not stupid about that whole trench coat thing, even in context.  If she really wanted Railrunner to go incognito, why not just give him the ability to change color or something? It's not like she was averse to giving him a million goddamn powers...
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Jul 28, 2013 04:44
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I didn't know whether anything could fill the hole left when J.-F. Bibeau's existence became too depressing to follow, but man did this book deliver! Internalized sexism is a hell of a thing -- and racism and killing "inferior" others is fine but heaven forbid you should use any salty language! Now make me a mint julep, I could leave it at "gently caress the south" but that'd be too antagonistic for too little reward, so let me share what I like the most about Twisted. It's the cover:  Look at that cover. Look at it. Look at the murky cross-hatching. Look at the scratchy ragged lettering. Look at how the hanging doffed trenchcoat/hoodie thing is there to conceal that the train's positioning makes no sense. Look at the klutzy perspective. Look at how Leek didn't even try to show those stupid wheel-fingers actually rolling along the track. And last but certainly not least, look at how the artwork is too short for the cover size, leaving empty black space at the top and bottom. Truly, sometimes you really can judge a book by its cover. Thanks for taking us on this amazing journey, JosephWongKS. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etebeZDt7Eo
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Jul 28, 2013 12:42
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I just binged through this entire thread over the course of a week. There's no pain, just numbness. And an odd sense of emptiness.
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Jul 29, 2013 03:12
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Waffleman_ posted:I just binged through this entire thread over the course of a week. There's no pain, just numbness. And an odd sense of emptiness. Lucky you. I read it in three days, then took a break from all things related to rollercoasters for a week. Hard to do when you're on vacation near Hershey, Pennsylvania where Hershey Park is.
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Jul 29, 2013 03:25
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And why the gently caress would loving amusement park rides build a loving civilization even remotely like ours anyway? Why the gently caress would the build buildings? How the gently caress would they build buildings? They have no thumbs THEY HAVE NO loving THUMBS!!
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Jul 29, 2013 07:58
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And so it continues.
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Jul 29, 2013 17:08
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The echo at 4 minutes in was inspired.
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Jul 29, 2013 18:53
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I didn't think it could get even better but it did 
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Jul 29, 2013 19:37
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Oh my god, you have no idea how much I needed that laugh today! I always have to pause these half a dozen times because I'm laughing too hard. When Jerk Store came up I had to pause then get up and walk around a little to collect myself.
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Jul 29, 2013 21:15
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Excerpt 11 posted:Sex... without intercourse Oh God, I'm sorry I ever doubted you Bobbin, I am so very afraid!  With that out of the way, though, the rest of that was still a good all-around mockery of the worst scenes, and the pictures served to elevate that mockery further. Once more, good on you all. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to forget about having listened to that. Rotten apple spoils the bunch and all.
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Jul 30, 2013 02:19
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Oblivion4568238 posted:Oh God, I'm sorry I ever doubted you Bobbin, I am so very afraid! I had so much fun choosing the right background music for that part.  Although that excerpt was certainly unsettling to read/listen. Particularly since I had to hear it half a dozen times or so while patching the audio together.  Bobbin did an amazing job with the images, I had to pause the video at the slow Hugh Laurie pan because I was laughing too hard to keep watching.Part 3 should be done within a week or so if I understood Bobbin correctly, and you folks should mentally prepare for the worst line in the entire book. 
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Jul 30, 2013 02:45
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You can't mentally prepare yourself for what's coming
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Jul 30, 2013 05:22
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I love the Gilbert Gottfried/ spoiled toddler tantrum you guys have going on for Railrunner.
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Jul 30, 2013 06:25
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paragon1 posted:I love the Gilbert Gottfried/ spoiled toddler tantrum you guys have going on for Railrunner. I was doing that voice for him long before this was a thing, thank-you-very-much. (thank you, it's always nice to hear other people find my silly voices funny)
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Jul 30, 2013 06:28
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