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Wentley
Feb 7, 2012

LLSix posted:

Don't try to cheat the ritual.

Indeed.

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Sogol
Apr 11, 2013

Galileo's Finger


I was going to suggest we should explain what is happening and give Snarl's a choice, but once we have picked him we should trust him. So, just wake him up and get on with it.

(It would be very Odysseus-like to get Snarl's to take the flint too, but let's save our cunning for enemies.)

Deadmeat5150
Nov 21, 2005

OLD MAN YELLS AT CLAN

LLSix posted:

Don't try to cheat the ritual.


Cheaters never prosper (Especially when dude is standing right there)

There Bias Two
Jan 13, 2009
I'm not a good person

A

Rahul
Dec 10, 2004

Jumping on the A bandwagon. We got told one item. Cheating probably isn't going to serve us well.

Disargeria
May 6, 2010

All Good Things are Wild and Free!

Diogines posted:


MINI VOTE - Expires in approximately two and a half hours.

1. You have decided to take Snarls Barkley. You...

A. Wake Snarls up and get moving.

B. Wake up Snarls and tell him to carry the flint and the iron in his mouth.



C. "Snarls, cheating is very bad. It would be very bad if I asked you to bring along something useful, like that Flint and Iron there. That would allow me to build fires anywhere I need to and provide a source of warmth and the ability to cook meat to feed us or even help craft tools useful to our survival.

Snarls, I am hereby not asking you to bring along the Flint and Iron right there. The things I am pointing at. Do not fetch those for me."

NinjaPete
Nov 14, 2004

Hail to the speaker,
Hail to the knower,
Joy to him who has understood,
Delight to those who have listened.

- Hávamál

LLSix posted:

Don't try to cheat the ritual.

...sigh....I GUESS we should do this.

ShotgunWillie
Aug 30, 2005

a sexy automaton -
powered by dark
oriental magic :roboluv:
A

I really hope we didn't make a mistake. I feel like we made an emotional, not a logical choice. I like Snarls and don't want him to die.

OhYo
Apr 14, 2006

LLSix posted:

Don't try to cheat the ritual.
More for this. A.

Imperialist Dog
Oct 21, 2008

"I think you could better spend your time on finishing your editing before the deadline today."
\
:backtowork:
I'm in a very different time zone, so apologies if this doesn't make the mini vote deadline.

We are resourceful. Asking Snarls to get the flint is resourcefulness. An animal companion bringing another item is perfectly legal, like a St Bernard with a cask of rum!

Also, remember the Peak Performance episode of TNG where Wesley snuck the antimatter on board and it ended up saving them from the Ferengi? Sure, it might have been viewed as a form of cheating but it was technically legal, the best kind of legal. What is not expressly illegal is allowed!

:goonsay:

So, B.

Deadly Ham Sandwich
Aug 19, 2009
Smellrose

Imperialist Dog posted:

What is not expressly illegal is allowed!

Legal is really whatever the king decides. There are no law books. Don't annoy the king with some shenanigans.

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

A number of months past, you passed Keza as she carried the dead Monkey off for the cooking pots. You shook your head in disgust and asked for Monkey. She gave him to you "it is more trouble to skin than worth the effort" she said "it's nothing but skin and bones anyway".

You told Danal, who was heartbroken and together, you buried him. Danal got over Monkey's death, eventually.




Back in the present... you stand with Tudiyah in the moonlight in the market, looking over those items he has arranged for you. After a moment, you choose... Snarls Barkley.

"Wake up boy" you say as you gently shake him.



He yawns and stretches, then stands up, looks at you and wags his tail. He gives a happy bark. Tudiya goes "shh" to Snarls, who oblidges him. Tudiya leads you away, Snarls follows close beside you.

The stars twinkle uncaring overhead.



Tudiya leads you through the city streets, to the gate, he is carrying a large sack in one hand, his spear in the other and wears his armor. Two sentries stand guard at the gate, they do not look surprised to see you, they open the gate and let you pass. As you walk a few dozen paces from the city, you overhear one say to the other "I hear a whole month? My Pa only had me out a week" to which the other responds "Poor kid, no food or water either, I hear."

After about ten minutes, Tudiyah finally speaks.

"Even in the time of my father, standards were slipping. By today, men take their sons into the wilderness, leave them with food and water and often, with an uncle or a brother, to keep an eye on them. They creep back into the city when they are done, bring an offering their fathers provided for them, they take the offering to the Temple and imagine others do not think much of their dishonor, for, did not all of their own brothers and fathers do the same?"





You continue to walk, after a few moments, he continues. "So it is now. But such it will not be, for you. As my father did for me, I shall do, for you. My father lead me into the wilderness and left me for there for a month, to seek an offering worthy of El and then return. My father woke me in the midst of the night and gave me a pick of many such things, with no warning of what lay ahead. He told me any one of them might see me through to the end, if I was clever, pious and strong. So it will be for you. He left me with no food. He left me with no water."

A star shoots across the sky, the stars and moon, bright.





"It will take us about a week to get there. Spend a month in the wilds. Find food, drink and safety as best as you can conceive. Find an offering worthy of El and then return to our home and place it upon the altar in El's temple. Do this and you will be a man. If you cannot or will not do this, do not return."

Tudiya's tone is somber. Much more somber than usual.

"You have questions. Ask."




Ask Tudiya any questions you wish to. Say anything you wish to him, though saying statements will requirement a mini vote, as will any obviously inflammatory questions.

If you want to do anything else, such as running off, or refusing to go, we will vote on that too.

Diogines fucked around with this message at 00:53 on Sep 24, 2013

A RICH WHITE MAN
Jul 30, 2010

See them other chickenheads? They don't never leave the coop.
What sort of offerings please El?

NinjaPete
Nov 14, 2004

Hail to the speaker,
Hail to the knower,
Joy to him who has understood,
Delight to those who have listened.

- Hávamál
What did you choose to take?

RandomPauI
Nov 24, 2006


Grimey Drawer
What tributes would El find the most pleasing?

E:FB

There Bias Two
Jan 13, 2009
I'm not a good person

"What does El desire most from us?"

Don't ask the marriage question.

There Bias Two fucked around with this message at 01:04 on Sep 24, 2013

Wentley
Feb 7, 2012
"Can I marry your daughter?"

Nettle Soup
Jan 30, 2010

Oh, and Jones was there too.

Hey Dio, does this mean Tudiya publicly thinks of us like a son or is it common practice for slaves without fathers to be taken out by their owners?

I guess with the wilds full to bursting with monsters, this isn't going to be the easiest of sabbaticals...

"I will return, and I will make El proud."

Nettle Soup fucked around with this message at 01:04 on Sep 24, 2013

Disargeria
May 6, 2010

All Good Things are Wild and Free!
"Will Danal do this?"

Deadmeat5150
Nov 21, 2005

OLD MAN YELLS AT CLAN

Wentley posted:

"Can I marry your daughter?"

Don't ask this poo poo that would be dumb

Raserys
Aug 22, 2011

IT'S YA BOY

Deadmeat5150 posted:

Don't ask this poo poo that would be dumb

Yo, seconding this

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

A RICH WHITE MAN posted:

What sort of offerings please El?

"El cares not for the smell of incense upon the altar or burning flesh, for he is all powerful, always was, is and always shall be. Our offerings are a testament to him of our faith. Things you value which you surrender, things gained at great cost and hardship, such are pleasing to El."


NinjaPete posted:

What did you choose to take?

"My spear."



UnassemblyRequired posted:

"What does El desire most from us?"

Don't ask the marriage question.

"To defend the outcast, the widow and the orphan. To be generous to the needy and strong in the defense of those in need of it. To keep your oaths and to honor your people."



Nettle Soup posted:

Hey Dio, does this mean Tudiya publicly thinks of us like a son or is it common practice for slaves without fathers to be taken out by their owners?

You have no idea if masters do this for child slaves, or if their fathers, if they are alive and in the city do, or if child slaves are simply excluded. This is probably not done for slaves or at least, none but the slaves of specially valuable or cherished slaves.

It is probably unusual for the king to take one of his slaves out to do this. He has dozens of slaves.



Disargeria posted:

"Will Danal do this?"

"In six years, yes."


Wentley posted:

"Can I marry your daughter?"

MINI VOTE. 1. Do you ask this question?
A. Yes.
b. No.

Diogines fucked around with this message at 01:16 on Sep 24, 2013

Tsyni
Sep 1, 2004
Lipstick Apathy
no

LLSix
Jan 20, 2010

The real power behind countless overlords

NinjaPete posted:

What did you choose to take?

This was a good question.

UnassemblyRequired posted:

"What does El desire most from us?"
We might have some ideas of our own about appropriate tributes from the time we spent at the temple when we were younger. What do we remember of Zebanatha's teachings on this topic? Anyone bring back a live wild deer to sacrifice? 'Cause we should totally try to do this.

Don't ask the marriage question.

What did you bring back to sacrifice?

FoxTerrier
Feb 15, 2012

Perfectly logical poster who uses the tools available to him to come to solid conclusions

Which star is the one people use most for guidance? What direction are we walking in?

HiHo ChiRho
Oct 23, 2010

no.

Zybourne Clock
Oct 25, 2011

Poke me.
Yes.

Since we're out here in the wilderness with nobody to eavesdrop on our conversation but Snarls and El, I want to be blunt with Tudiya and ask him what he would consider a reasonable bride price for the hand of his daughter.

Basscop
Jun 4, 2010

Lightnin? HA! Thats a good 'un!
Now why dontcha
come o'er here and
GET

IN

MY

BELLY!!!

Zybourne Clock posted:

Yes.

Since we're out here in the wilderness with nobody to eavesdrop on our conversation but Snarls and El, I want to be blunt with Tudiya and ask him what he would consider a reasonable bride price for the hand of his daughter.

This but we should really phrase the question differently because "can i marry your daughter" is blunt and dumb and we should show more respect to the king.

Sogol
Apr 11, 2013

Galileo's Finger
B No, on the marriage question.

Yes, on the 'what did you choose'?

I am guessing we will have to search our own heart for an appropriate offering.

Perhaps at some point in the 'week to get there' we could ask him to tell us a story of his choosing?

Statement before we part company:
"It is an honor to serve you and we are grateful. Please tell Danal to stay out of trouble until we get back if he can, and our Mother not to worry."

I was wondering how many people have the King take them for their rite of passage. Apparently its got its upsides and downsides.

Umm... A week has 10 days? What phase is the moon? We should note the moon so we have slme idea about when a month has passed.

As an aside, are the hours of the day marked in any way in Zepath, like the hour of Ganal, etc. or some such?

Tell Snarls to pay attention at some point so we can find our way back when it is time, should we both survive.

Nettle Soup
Jan 30, 2010

Oh, and Jones was there too.

No

"What was your offering?"

Nettle Soup fucked around with this message at 01:28 on Sep 24, 2013

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

LLSix posted:

We might have some ideas of our own about appropriate tributes from the time we spent at the temple when we were younger. What do we remember of Zebanatha's teachings on this topic? Anyone bring back a live wild deer to sacrifice? 'Cause we should totally try to do this.
You do not know if a live wild deer has been brought back on one of these rituals, because till you were just told of this, you had no idea this occurred. The ritual was kept a secret from women and children.

Traditional offerings include livestock of many sorts, wheat and other produce, incense and on occasion, gold. Live and dead animals are brought to be burned upon El's altar. Zebanetha would likely tell you to bring a sheep or a cow. Bits from monsters also make fine offerings, though they are more rare.


LLSix posted:

What did you bring back to sacrifice?
"Myself. I rested my head upon the altar and pledged to serve El till my final breath."


FoxTerrier posted:

Which star is the one people use most for guidance? What direction are we walking in?
He points to a single star. You know of it, it's place is fixed in the heavens, always to the north. "Smattas, ever true. Follow him home."

Diogines fucked around with this message at 01:33 on Sep 24, 2013

Sogol
Apr 11, 2013

Galileo's Finger

Zybourne Clock posted:

Yes.

Since we're out here in the wilderness with nobody to eavesdrop on our conversation but Snarls and El, I want to be blunt with Tudiya and ask him what he would consider a reasonable bride price for the hand of his daughter.

We don't even know if we want to marry his daughter. It has never been put to a vote. When we voted on keeping our feelings to ourself or making hay we chose the former.

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Sogol posted:

We don't even know if we want to marry his daughter. It has never been put to a vote. When we voted on keeping our feelings to ourself or making hay we chose the former.

On the whole, you as an individual poster can hold whatever view you want. When most or all of you believe something, Enkidel does. If you are a minority view, you are that portion of Enkidel's mind in doubt. When no one can agree, Enkidel is uncertain.

And no, we are not Denziroh-style here, you are not an actual voice in his head.

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

FoxTerrier posted:

What direction are we walking in?

"South."

HiHo ChiRho
Oct 23, 2010

Zybourne Clock posted:

Since we're out here in the wilderness with nobody to eavesdrop on our conversation but Snarls and El, I want to be blunt with Tudiya and ask him what he would consider a reasonable bride price for the hand of his daughter.

I think the question doesn't have to be asked at all. He broke off Naomi's betrothal, and hasn't wed her to anyone else yet. He, the KING, is taking his slave out to his manhood ritual. He is treating us like his son. I'm pretty sure he knows we have feelings for each other anyway, and is likely happy we haven't dishonored her.

Instead of bluntly asking for her hand, we spend this month to bluntly prove that we are worthy to marry her with our actions?

Sogol
Apr 11, 2013

Galileo's Finger

Diogines posted:

On the whole, you as an individual poster can hold whatever view you want. When most or all of you believe something, Enkidel does. If you are a minority view, you are that portion of Enkidel's mind in doubt. When no one can agree, Enkidel is uncertain.

And no, we are not Denziroh-style here, you are not an actual voice in his head.
Of course. So noted.

Moon?

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Sogol posted:

Of course. So noted.

Moon?
The moon is full.

Deadly Ham Sandwich
Aug 19, 2009
Smellrose
No, don't ask about marriage. Get your minds off pussy for five drat minutes, we have poo poo to do.

Question1: Do we know anything about finding water in the wild (what geography to look for, animal paths, etc)? If not, ask Tudiya where one can always find water.

Question2: Do we know of any wild plants that are edible? Fruit? If not, ask Tudiya.

Question3: Do we know of any dangerous or poisonous wildlife or fauna that we should look out for? Not monsters, just harder to notice bugs and plants. If not, ask Tudiya.

Question4: Did Tudiya bring provisions for a whole week of travel? If he is foraging, then pay attention to what he gathers and where he finds it. If he is not foraging, then ask if he could forage on the way and teach us.

We are walking for a week, that is plenty of time to learn some of these things.


Question5: THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION! Ask Tudiya to tell the story of Labaras' first journey into the wilderness at 16. Then ask for the story of his journey.

BoyG
Nov 24, 2004

Have you heard the tale of the Cannibal King of Kavodel?
Ask again about the significance of the golden statue we did not choose.

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Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Deadly Ham Sandwich posted:

Question1: Do we know anything about finding water in the wild (what geography to look for, animal paths, etc)? If not, ask Tudiya where one can always find water.
"Look for green" he says "Plants need water. Look for the greatest plants in the smallest area and dig. Stand atop valleys and look down for water in the low points."


Deadly Ham Sandwich posted:

Question2: Do we know of any wild plants that are edible? Fruit? If not, ask Tudiya.
Tudiya describes several plants as edible, if foul tasting and not nutritious. You do not know many plants as edible, besides those commonly used for foodstuff, such as fruits, certain berries and a handful of other plants.


Deadly Ham Sandwich posted:

Question3: Do we know of any dangerous or poisonous wildlife or fauna that we should look out for? Not monsters, just harder to notice bugs and plants. If not, ask Tudiya.
You know that most bright yellow berries are poisonous. You know several types of plants which cause horrible rashes. There are no poisonous insects, but there are a few sorts of poisonous snakes, which you already know of. Tudiya described several others you should watch out for.


Deadly Ham Sandwich posted:

Question4: Did Tudiya bring provisions for a whole week of travel? If he is foraging, then pay attention to what he gathers and where he finds it. If he is not foraging, then ask if he could forage on the way and teach us.
"I did." He is carrying a large sack over a shoulder.


Deadly Ham Sandwich posted:

Question5: THE MOST IMPORTANT QUESTION! Ask Tudiya to tell the story of Labaras' first journey into the wilderness at 16. Then ask for the story of his journey.
You can have this, or an update tomorrow, but not both. If you want it, I will happily give the full details, but that takes time to write up, it might even take two days. Which would you prefer?

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