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falcon2424
May 2, 2005

Tsyni posted:

I don't think sending Snarls back is smart. His paw is just sprained. If Az won't heal him we can carry him or just take it real easy for the first little while.

Yeah. This is my take, too.

Also, I feel like, in a weird way, we should be enjoying out time abroad. Eyescream sucked.

But, at this point, we're free. We're able to survive in the wilds. We've gotten a suitably impressive sacrifice (monster we killed + several cows in pearls) and just had a hero-level adventure.

The walk back isn't exactly short. But it's only a week or two of survivable travel and we'll hit the boundaries of our region. I can see wanting to just finish out, independent of our caution around Az.

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the_steve
Nov 9, 2005

We're always hiring!

1. Yes, drink up. But split it with Snarls.
2. "I appreciate it, really, but technically I think I still have to walk. Besides, I made it this far, may as well finish the job." and then grin, because it's either that or take time to fully process how close to dying we just came.
3. L. I think that if we had actually NEEDED it, Azz or someone would have gone to bat for us.

Also: If the offer to heal Snarls is still on the table, I vote we say yes to that.

SerSpook
Feb 13, 2012




falcon2424 posted:

Yeah. This is my take, too.

Also, I feel like, in a weird way, we should be enjoying out time abroad. Eyescream sucked.

But, at this point, we're free. We're able to survive in the wilds. We've gotten a suitably impressive sacrifice (monster we killed + several cows in pearls) and just had a hero-level adventure.

The walk back isn't exactly short. But it's only a week or two of survivable travel and we'll hit the boundaries of our region. I can see wanting to just finish out, independent of our caution around Az.

This is another important thing too. Yeah, we seem to be able to survive in the scrublands. Not thrive, but if we have leftover food from our time at sea, then we'll be in pretty solid shape for the trip to the river. The river will then be both freshwater and fish for us. We might need to modify our spear fishing technique a bit to adjust for river currents, etc, but the core concept should work out.

And we get to see some of the world while we do this. No giant abominations, because this is Zepa's line and I get the feeling that most monsters will be smaller ones like that jackal. We can handle those.

Basically, I'm saying we should just finish up. Maybe not even heal Snarls because Azzazel isn't entirely trustworthy and we can fashion a sling of some sort or carry him.

Zybourne Clock
Oct 25, 2011

Poke me.
Even if Snarls can talk and this isn't a trick Azzazel is pulling on us, we shouldn't forget that he's a dog. A very smart dog, but not omniscient or incapable of wrong judgment. Snarls might trust Azzazel, but that doesn't mean we have to do the same.

I'm not in favor of asking Azz to heal and teleport our dog for us because we still end up owing him a favor. If we absolutely have to, we have to make it absolutely clear to Azz that we are not asking him to give our dog a lift, it's Snarls who is personally asking Azz for a teleport. That way, it's Snarls' soul that's on the line and not ours. Maybe even give Snarls a pearl so he can pay Azz for his services and let them sign a contract, that way it's a business agreement and not a favor.

Diog, according to the men of Zepath, do (talking) animals have souls? Can animals legally sign contracts?

WhiteOutMouse
Jul 29, 2010

:wom: will blow your mind.
I would like a goat-bow that shoots magical (unlimited supply) arrows. Maybe make it wonkey and crazy like Azz himself and let the arrows turn other beasts and monsters into goats or something. He has to like a plan that uses a goat to make more goats, that would rule. If he does not go for this plan maybe find a way to get a consolation prize? Our club back? A different weapon? Having one would make the trip that much easier.

Azz mentioned that people of Zepath would think he is controlling us if we had a note from him. So we might not be able to really even talk about his aid, of whatever flavor we accept, openly.

His words to Ishmael are still cryptic and we should inform/warn him.

As much as I want to make Snarls happy and teleport home and give our mommy a big :glomp: I sadly (sadly) think we should walk this off with Snarls all the way home. Even though more monsters and hardships await. Teleporting our dog home or even a message would inform many of our dealings with Azz and the :tinfoil: will start.

Tomn
Aug 23, 2007

And the angel said unto him
"Stop hitting yourself. Stop hitting yourself."
But lo he could not. For the angel was hitting him with his own hands

Zybourne Clock posted:

That way, it's Snarls' soul that's on the line and not ours.

gently caress that. Our dog, our responsibility, our soul. We're not going to let Snarls take the fall for our own bad decisions.

Thanks for helping me decide against the "Send Snarls home via Azzazel Express" plan, though.

UppaTree
May 4, 2013

Diogines posted:

Returning on foot will take you about three weeks, maybe a month.

.... and it looks like at this rate you are going back on foot because you are worried about... what exactly? Clearly not the agony your mother will endure thinking you may be dead already. You do not casually disregard that fact, you do not even think about it, after all, all that matters is your trial going well.


You Magnificent Bastard. I mean both of those with the utmost sincerity, by the way.

We truly should spend some time with Jalitha, but no, I'm not going to invalidate my hardships in the eyes of El to arrive a little sooner. Take your guilt trip and carry it up the mountain.

Impressing the men of Zepath is secondary to impressing our faith upon That-Which-We-Pray-To-As-El, who has saved our collective savage heathen rear end quite a few times. The mortals will not know, but Those Who Watch will, and Bad Things will be set in motion.

Our slimy friend here knows this. He knows he's doing something Naughty, hence his conspiratorial winking and talk of keeping a low profile, and he's trying to sell us a screwjob in the guise of a helpful lift back home.

UppaTree fucked around with this message at 22:39 on Oct 22, 2013

falcon2424
May 2, 2005

Do we really want to make the trip back without Snarls?

Even if we have to carry him, he's our friend. Plus, he's our way of ensuring that stuff doesn't eat us while we sleep. Or that we don't die from eating spoiled meat or tainted water.

And, I think people would freak out if our continuous companion showed up at the city without us. They'd think we'd died.

RandomPauI
Nov 24, 2006


Grimey Drawer
Those are good points falcon.

Basscop
Jun 4, 2010

Lightnin? HA! Thats a good 'un!
Now why dontcha
come o'er here and
GET

IN

MY

BELLY!!!
I wanna ask Azz

"Any way you could help us get our club back?"

Since we don't want him to transport us home we might get our magic monster barb club back before we head home.

Tsyni
Sep 1, 2004
Lipstick Apathy
If Eyescream has retreated it might not be a bad idea to rest here with Snarls for a day and see if we can recover it, unless the forest is complete rubble and that would be impossible. I know that it's just some magic spikes, but it's been a part of our journey.

Edit: Snarls could probably sniff it out, actually, so rubble might not be a problem.

Tsyni fucked around with this message at 22:51 on Oct 22, 2013

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Since some may have missed it, the trip is roughly three weeks back.

2 weeks up the river, four days to a week to get there? You do not know the exact location of the river. If it curves north, longer. Unless you plan to go through the scrubland, eating scavenged kills and cactus juice piss.


quote:

Try and think back, "Who's a good boy? We did good!"
*very tired bark*

quote:

"Is Snarls smarter than a goat?"
"Goats are EXACTLY as smart as they are supposed to be, thank you very much! Hmph! The nerve!"

quote:

think at Snarls: "Can you hear me? Do you understand me?"
*another, very tired bark*


quote:

Any response to the goat horn question?
Unless I am mistaken, you left all of the goat bits on the goat?

quote:

Question for Diog: Do we have any remaining smoked fish or other food? How many days worth if we conserve it?
You have no food, what small bits were left you abandoned in your mad dash to get away.

quote:

Ask Snarls which he'd want.
Bad smells. Bad sounds. Home. Pack. Warm. Safe.


quote:

Any way you could help us get our club back?
"Pick it up.....?"

spacetimecontinuu
Dec 31, 2004
I really really like that you guys have named it eyescream. Also yes boot it is a reference to walking and is synonymous with "hoof it." I say it's synonymous because I actually meant to say hoof it.

Slaan
Mar 16, 2009



ASHERAH DEMANDS I FEAST, I VOTE FOR A FEAST OF FLESH

Snarls posted:

Bad smells. Bad sounds. Home. Pack. Warm. Safe.

Home is where the Master-friend is, Snarls. :colbert:

Sogol
Apr 11, 2013

Galileo's Finger
Drat. I have had us carrying around goat horns, but just reading Diog posts there is no mention of them. Too bad. They would have also made decent containers on the way home. What about snails? We have any of those? I am also imagining we do.

So, an imaginary bow from our imaginary goat horns. At least we can't screw that up too badly.

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

I will be home in about an hour. If anyone does a count, odds are high I will update when we get home.

SerSpook
Feb 13, 2012




To confirm my vote C, K, J and I wish to politely decline help.

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Sorry Sogol :(. Both were interesting ideas. Many people said to leave the goat horns. A few people said to take snails and a few said not to.

There Bias Two
Jan 13, 2009
I'm not a good person

Changing my vote to politely decline the drink and all offers of assistance from Azz. We'll do the manly thing and hoof it.

WhiteOutMouse
Jul 29, 2010

:wom: will blow your mind.

Diogines posted:

quote:

quote:
"Is Snarls smarter than a goat?"
"Goats are EXACTLY as smart as they are supposed to be, thank you very much! Hmph! The nerve!"

This means we have a smart dog. A smart dog who is smarter than he is supposed to be. He is not a normal dog. He is something more.

JT Jag
Aug 30, 2009

#1 Jaguars Sunk Cost Fallacy-Haver
Snarls is definitely our most valuable asset right now. We need to do everything we can to keep him alive, and that includes keeping an eye on him ourselves. I retract my vote to ask Azzazel to teleport him in favor of asking Azzazel to heal him.

jazzyhattrick
Jul 1, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
Decline offer to be transported back in favour of healing for snarls.

Also, Invite him to accompany us on our walk home, we can exchange stories. "hey Azzael, let me tell you about the time I broke this rear end in a top hat's nose, or about how snarls here managed to poo poo on some bitch's ceiling."

Tsyni
Sep 1, 2004
Lipstick Apathy

jazzyhattrick posted:

Decline offer to be transported back in favour of healing for snarls.

Also, Invite him to accompany us on our walk home, we can exchange stories. "hey Azzael, let me tell you about the time I broke this rear end in a top hat's nose, or about how snarls here managed to poo poo on some bitch's ceiling.


I don't think we sound quite so crass. Don't forget our monocle.

RandomPauI
Nov 24, 2006


Grimey Drawer
That's an interesting idea.

Repay his help for snarls with a few stories.

Nettle Soup
Jan 30, 2010

Oh, and Jones was there too.

Count is here, it's editable if any of you sods wanna change your vote or think I've noted it wrong.

paragon1
Nov 22, 2010

FULL COMMUNISM NOW
C NO THANKS and L

Deadly Ham Sandwich
Aug 19, 2009
Smellrose
Just clearing up what my votes are. I went and changed it in spread sheet.

1. G. Split drink with Snarls. Half us, half Snarls.
2. Heal Snarls, please.
3. J. El may have been helping my luck in dodging those trees.

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Voting is closed.

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

Diogines posted:

You take a moment to examine Snarls leg. You are no doggy doctor, but it appears to be a bad sprain, not broken. Bed rest and tummy rubs should fix it. Hiking through the wilderness will not. Left to your own devices, you anticipate it will take you roughly three weeks to get home.


You take the goblet from Azzazel. You take a deep drink and then hold it out to Snarls, who laps up the juice. You finally dress, Azzazel snickers slightly when you finally realize you are naked and do something about it, but your nudity did not seem to have much of an effect on him prior to that point.


"Could... you heal Snarls instead?" you ask Azzazel.




"What?" he says "Creature, you have done remarkably well and I would be hard pressed to find any who would find serious fault so far. I only offer at all because you decided to grab the dog at risk of your own life when any sensible Manimal would have left him and ran. But, as you wish, certainly. Of course. My PLEASURE! After all, isn't that what friends are for? Are we not good friends?"

1. Well, are you?
A. What? No! I don't say anything though.
B. No, and I tell him.
C. No, but I tell him we are.
D. Yes, I don't say anything though.
E. Yes, and I tell him.
F. Yes, but I tell him we are not.
G. I have another reaction. Fill in.


Azzazel's tone is friendly and genuine, regardless of how you feel about his true intentions.

"But there is a catch... well, not a catch so much as a condition. Two of them. First. You can't tell anyone you met me. Well okay Ishamal I suppose, but no one else. And you will owe me a favor one day." Before you can even open your mouth to ask he says "Oh and don't give me that look! Don't think so little of me Creature, nothing Uncouth or Untoward, though not necessarily easily, I won't have you slaying puppies or abducting brides from their marriage beds or anything unpleasant of that sort. A favor for a favor. Do we have a deal?"


2. To which you say...
A. Deal.
B. Deal, but I changed my mind. Send us home instead.
C. Thanks for the apple juice, but no deal.
D. Something else. Fill in.

Diogines fucked around with this message at 01:09 on Oct 23, 2013

SerSpook
Feb 13, 2012




G- we are unsure. We are friendly towards him, certainly, but we are not sure of his intentions regarding us.

C


No favors, no strings. We can trek it easily enough. But we are polite above all else. Say that we will certainly not reveal him to any casual person, though Ishamal will certainly get his message.

Deadly Ham Sandwich
Aug 19, 2009
Smellrose
1. E. We are friends.
2. D. "Friends don't need to owe favors to ask for help. Ask, and I will try my best to help." I guess that is also a vote for C + a response. No favors.

HiHo ChiRho
Oct 23, 2010

Would you favor cause us to fall out of favor with El?

Diogines
Dec 22, 2007

Beaky the Tortoise says, click here to join our choose Your Own Adventure Game!

Paradise Lost: Clash of the Heavens!

HiHo ChiRho posted:

Would you favor cause us to fall out of favor with El?

"What? No. Of course not. I am rewarding your virtue, Creature. A lesser individual would have just left the dog and run for it, instead, you lifted it up at peril to your own survival and such, should be rewarded."

Nettle Soup
Jan 30, 2010

Oh, and Jones was there too.

1:F - Haha nah, of course not dude, grin and make a joke of it, he knows we're friends but it's not a big deal.
2:A - Deal. As a story, this is the more interesting option. Also, I think we genuinely like him and don't want to permanently cripple our dog.

Nettle Soup fucked around with this message at 01:13 on Oct 23, 2013

jazzyhattrick
Jul 1, 2010

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS
1:E

2:"Not necessarily easy? I don't know if it's escaped your notice but I'm not the kind of guy to do things the easy way. As long as it isn't anything dishonourable you have your self a deal. And don't be shy about asking me for more favours once we're square, friends do favours for each other all the time."

Wentley
Feb 7, 2012

Deadly Ham Sandwich posted:

1. E. We are friends.
2. D. "Friends don't need to owe favors to ask for help. Ask, and I will try my best to help." I guess that is also a vote for C + a response. No favors.

I agree with this. No need to be a dick about it, friends help friends.

Volmarias
Dec 31, 2002

EMAIL... THE INTERNET... SEARCH ENGINES...

Diogines posted:

1. Well, are you?
G. I have another reaction. Fill in.

We're not friends yet, but we're getting to be.

quote:

2. To which you say...
D. Something else. Fill in.

No, thank you, but if you're ever in the mood we'd be delighted to have a travelling companion on the way home to tell tales with. A good joke is its own reward.

LLSix
Jan 20, 2010

The real power behind countless overlords

1.


2. That sounds like a great deal, but I don't want to be owing any favors during this trial. Maybe next time I come out to visit you we can talk more and you can tell me more about how great and wonderous you are.

Facebook Aunt
Oct 4, 2008

wiggle wiggle




Deadly Ham Sandwich posted:

1. E. We are friends.
2. D. "Friends don't need to owe favors to ask for help. Ask, and I will try my best to help." I guess that is also a vote for C + a response. No favors.

This sounds good. EC

We made friends with a witch, a flute playing beggar, a prince, an old woman, and a mysterious man of extraordinary age. We make friends easily. There is no reason we wouldn't want to add Azz to our odd menagerie of friends. We aren't complete strangers, we aren't enemies, we are friends. He's a jolly fun fellow, and if we weren't on our manhood trial we might quite enjoy spending a month with him, but we have to do our Duty first.

Likewise, he is constrained by his Duty as a ???. He can outright gift us things in certain circumstances, but if we try to bargain he has to get something in return. It is probably best not to get into debt with him. However, if in the future we can help him, he need only ask and we will try, as a friend.

Another 3 weeks of walking sucks, but it isn't too much for us. We ate well at the beach. We only have to make it 4 days to reach a river that should again provide us with regular meals. We can drink cactus piss for 4 days.

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Task Manager
Sep 5, 2008

A weird time in which we are alive. We can travel anywhere we want, even to other planets. And for what? To sit day after day, declining in morale and hope.
1)E- Yes, and I tell him. You can be friends with someone you don't fully trust. Cut the poor devil some slack. At the least we are friends with him, yes.

2)A Accept. From an in game perspective, Snarls has been a true friend and helped us greatly. Hes in pain. Should we accept a selfish deal for our own gain? No. Should we accept a selfless gain to help our loyal companion? Yes.

Out of game perspective, I really want to know more about Azzazel. Lets do a side quest down the line for him.

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