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alnilam

7777777 posted:

i want julio to read the jett meltdown post for my prize

lmao

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tao of lmao



sorry please play again!

http://invisiblecastle.com/roller/view/4714843/

WindmillSlayer

change my title text to say "I really just want a guy I can come home to at night, who will already have Anime on, my hookah lit, is dressed all pinup-ey and poo poo, and is ready to gently caress on the dime. That would be sick."

tao of lmao

WindmillSlayer posted:

change my title text to say "I really just want a guy I can come home to at night, who will already have Anime on, my hookah lit, is dressed all pinup-ey and poo poo, and is ready to gently caress on the dime. That would be sick."

ulvir

two failures in a row. huh :crossarms:

ulvir

anyway another wildcard http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3665731&pagenumber=48&perpage=40#post435390729

peace

FluffieDuckie

WindmillSlayer posted:

change my title text to say "I really just want a guy I can come home to at night, who will already have Anime on, my hookah lit, is dressed all pinup-ey and poo poo, and is ready to gently caress on the dime. That would be sick."

you're queued bb

tao of lmao


you used your wildcard spin already, sorry!

ulvir

what? where does it say that you only have ...

wth posted:

You may submit a post of each topic once for a potential total of ten spins.

Oh.

FartGhost

we can use old posts?

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3661759&userid=197565

this one for the bus

FartGhost

Draw a picture of your most embarrassing work/school moment

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3650461&pagenumber=2&perpage=40#post432170943

i went as a badly drawn pig for halloween last year, it was embarrassing i tell you

also id like the op to read this post into vocaroo

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3676281#post436802436

tao of lmao

FartGhost posted:

we can use old posts?


no

tao of lmao

Can someone find jett's meltdown post? Apparently it's not in my folder marked "meltdown.txt"

WindmillSlayer


this post is old tho

ulvir

thought that was the point with wildcards? wth approved it anyway

WindmillSlayer

idk just wondering about the rules

tao of lmao

dammit i shouldn't have accepted that but it's done so whatever

ulvir

I'll eat a probe if I was unknowingly cheating. even if I didn't win anything

tao of lmao

nah it's my bad i should have been paying more attention

Ace of Baes
you shoud errm probe yourself :wink:

ulvir

maybe make the rules for wildcard entries and in general how new a submission must be a bit more explicit.

ulvir

or not. maybe its just me thats dumb and don't get rules

tao of lmao

wth posted:

DO NOT THREAD poo poo OTHER THREADS!! Try to find a way to work the listed topic into the topic of the thread you're posting in. You get one submission here for each topic. So while you can workshop your ideas into others' threads, please make sure you submit the best post you can for that subject. If myself or the mods find a post particularly funny or good, we hit the slots. Only posts made after the time of this post are eligible. Submissions will be accepted until Sunday, November 16th, 12:00 a.m. EST.

tao of lmao

i should have bolded it in the first place though so i'll go edit the op

FluffieDuckie

to be fair, that's a lot of words for a yobber to read

tao of lmao

jett posted:

During the events of May 18th, 2014, I was treated unfairly and otherwise abused in several ways. First, Prefuse is an overreacting dumb idiot. Second, the whole finger thing is old as gently caress. Third, forums poster I.N.R.I is a piece of poo poo. For these and various other reasons I was unjustly demodded and should have a chance to tell my side of the story.

holy loving poo poo i leaked the modqueue, an infraction that i was never explicitly told was against the rules and i only accidentally discovered was even slightly looked down upon when i stumbled across the hidden defunct ik forum. still, out of some intuitive sense of not being a complete loving idiot, i largely refrained from sharing the dark whisperings and demonic incantations that occur wherein, but when i saw what at least out of context appeared to be prefuse getting so mad at--oh the humanity--someone trolling fyad that he attempted to slap him with an effective permaban, i couldn't resist the temptation to make an exception on the following grounds: it was kinda funny. whereupon prefuse, who apparently has been demodded once already for the EXACT SAME THING, teleported to the byob thread and quietly escalated things. somehow or another the thread got moved to fyad, presumably so prefuse could have the pleasure of probating me personally. this effectively proves that he is a dumb baby whose butt i wouldn't touch with a ten-foot pole even if a gentle application of lubricant to the anus was the only thing that would make the difference between him successfully passing a log the size and hardness of a tree trunk or bleeding out from rectal tearing.

and let me just get some other poo poo straight here, even though it will be impossible to ever completely stamp this out, just a helpful little fact for all the virgins and "breeder"-haters around here: parenting is loving gross. it is full of dignity-destroying and uncomfortable poo poo, things that before you became a parent you would have sworn on your life you would never stoop to doing, but you have to do them just to maintain the basic hygeine and health of your kid, and things get even worse of the kid has health problems. hell, spreading aquaphor on the poop chute to aid the passing of a murderously painful turd under the full sanction of a gastroenterological nurse practitioner is hardly the sickest thing i've done. not once but twice i have pruriently stared at a vital signs monitor, watching the pulse and blood pressure of my newborn daughter trend in the general direction of zero because her heart was literally rigged to kill her a couple of weeks after birth. more than three years later i sat and shamelessly fondled my head (the one containing my skull) in my hands because i felt like passing out after learning that my son had a severe skin defect, totally unrelated to my daughter's heart defect, and i had earned a second ride on the rollercoaster through hell. but those things aren't very funny to recount in a comedy forum so excuse me, princess, that my 95%-capacity-at-all-times stress level randomly bubbled up one day and caused me to tactlessly share an anecdote about my kids being constipated. i still have to pray to god that i can raise my children healthy enough that they get to attend my funeral someday instead of the other way around, but they have trouble pooping, too. it's FUNNY.

and lastly and probably leastly, can we just temper with the ironic inri love for a second and be real here? inri's rap sheet clearly shows that he is, not only qualitatively but actually quantifiably, one of the shittiest posters on the forum, and his only entertainment value is that very shittiness. anyone else with his track record would be long since permabanned by now, but he can be relied upon to on a regular basis and it's amusing to watch his fried short-term memory lapse, whereupon he forgets that if he posts yet another thread in yospos about sucking steve jobs' dick he'll get probed AGAIN. so yeah, when i get multiple pm's from people upset that he basically posted baby animal gore fetish porn (politically charged baby animal gore fetish porn that it might have been :fuckkfc:), i figured yeah, that seems like it's worth requesting a ban for. plus banning inri is functionally equivalent to shooting a zombie in the pinkie toe as far as net effect goes.

In conclusion, while I am resigned to the fact that I did technically break a rule and my IK days are over, I still feel that many of the goings-on yesterday were a load of hosed up tiny dog poo poo. I don't wish Prefuse any ill will because I understand that he was simply doing what was necessary to maintain the high standards of the forum that it is his business to moderahhahahahaha. My son is much more regular lately without need of extraordinary intervention and quite frankly, my wife is way quicker to resort to digital aid than I am. Lastly, the forums just wouldn't be the same without that dancing butt-tree avatar, but really I don't think we have much to worry about there. Keep it chill, and unless someone with a red probe button (a button that I made possible to appear in BYOB, mind you) flips their poo poo over this post you'll probably be seeing me around.

Tell you what, I'll read the first paragraph of this epic loving rant, and the each of the following ones for every match-2 request until it's complete. THE PERSON WHO GETS ME TO COMPLETE READING THE RANT (the 5th request) WILL GET A SPECIAL PRIZE AT THE END OF THE WEEK Deal?

edit: because i can't count

tao of lmao fucked around with this message at 01:58 on Nov 13, 2014

FluffieDuckie

wth posted:

Tell you what, I'll read the first paragraph of this epic loving rant, and the each of the following ones for every match-2 request until it's complete. THE PERSON WHO GETS ME TO COMPLETE READING THE RANT (the 5th request) WILL GET A SPECIAL PRIZE AT THE END OF THE WEEK Deal?

edit: because i can't count

did you just edit your OP to say "of reasonable length"?? :colbert:

tao of lmao

Please, give me a chance to tell my side of the story...

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1KsUn0Vr83P

tao of lmao

FartGhost posted:

Draw a picture of your most embarrassing work/school moment

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3650461&pagenumber=2&perpage=40#post432170943

i went as a badly drawn pig for halloween last year, it was embarrassing i tell you

also id like the op to read this post into vocaroo

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3676281#post436802436

not accepting that submission, please try again.

For your 2nd part:

http://vocaroo.com/i/s0z4F1h3V9Rt

tao of lmao

Full Bodied Flavor requested this post-reading from beyond the grave:

Security Drone posted:

the basic Bwee control structure is (skim comment) -> (Is this person in my forum "clique"?) -> (If yes approve of whatever was said) -> (if no either ignore or insult them).

every time you see bwee get into an argument you see the same people show up to yell at the people yelling at bwee. it is nice that he has friends that 'has his back', but sometimes I think they overvalue the 'rough and tumble forum gang' gimmick. i still think he's funny occasionally though but dropping the fake gimmick and interacting like a normal person with people would be an improvement.

http://vocaroo.com/i/s02NE1MguskO

FluffieDuckie

wth posted:

Full Bodied Flavor requested this post-reading from beyond the grave:


http://vocaroo.com/i/s02NE1MguskO

this was beautiful julio

Full-Bodied Flavor

wth posted:

Full Bodied Flavor requested this post-reading from beyond the grave:


http://vocaroo.com/i/s02NE1MguskO

worth the probe :anime:

FluffieDuckie


wb bb sorry about that :shrug:

Veskit

I love capitalism!! DM me for the best investing advice!
IMPROVING PRODUCTIVITY IN THE WORKPLACE

Veskit posted:

gently caress me I need to get my team more onboard with sharepoint. My coworker is trying to roll out a 10 tab spreadsheet for one testing item that only happens over a 2 week period :stare:

bwatts

i dont know what the gently caress that means so make another post and try again.

cat_herder

BE GAY
DO CRIME


Workplace productivity http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?noseen=0&threadid=3681002&perpage=40&pagenumber=1#post437612432

hit me

landy.
workplace productivity

http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3680915&perpage=40#post437614109

may not actually be a good post

Wertjoe

can i get a wildcard for this nonsense in the detective thread?
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3681002&pagenumber=2#post437614629

FluffieDuckie


this man posted something hysterical in yospos in support of the cop thread in byob. i know it's kind of outside the boundaries of the rules, but i'd give him a spin just for the hell of it.

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HiipFire

JENNY DEATH LIVES

wth posted:

what category does this post fit under?

wildcard i guess

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