- alnilam
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i want julio to read the jett meltdown post for my prize
lmao
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Nov 13, 2014 00:32
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 30, 2024 19:27
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- WindmillSlayer
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change my title text to say "I really just want a guy I can come home to at night, who will already have Anime on, my hookah lit, is dressed all pinup-ey and poo poo, and is ready to gently caress on the dime. That would be sick."
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Nov 13, 2014 00:34
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- tao of lmao
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change my title text to say "I really just want a guy I can come home to at night, who will already have Anime on, my hookah lit, is dressed all pinup-ey and poo poo, and is ready to gently caress on the dime. That would be sick."
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Nov 13, 2014 00:35
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- ulvir
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two failures in a row. huh 
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Nov 13, 2014 00:38
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- FluffieDuckie
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change my title text to say "I really just want a guy I can come home to at night, who will already have Anime on, my hookah lit, is dressed all pinup-ey and poo poo, and is ready to gently caress on the dime. That would be sick."
you're queued bb
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Nov 13, 2014 00:43
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- tao of lmao
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you used your wildcard spin already, sorry!
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Nov 13, 2014 00:44
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- ulvir
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what? where does it say that you only have ...
You may submit a post of each topic once for a potential total of ten spins.
Oh.
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Nov 13, 2014 00:46
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- FartGhost
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Draw a picture of your most embarrassing work/school moment
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3650461&pagenumber=2&perpage=40#post432170943
i went as a badly drawn pig for halloween last year, it was embarrassing i tell you
also id like the op to read this post into vocaroo
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3676281#post436802436
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Nov 13, 2014 01:16
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- tao of lmao
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no
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Nov 13, 2014 01:31
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- tao of lmao
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Can someone find jett's meltdown post? Apparently it's not in my folder marked "meltdown.txt"
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Nov 13, 2014 01:33
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- WindmillSlayer
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this post is old tho
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Nov 13, 2014 01:35
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- ulvir
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thought that was the point with wildcards? wth approved it anyway
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Nov 13, 2014 01:36
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- WindmillSlayer
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idk just wondering about the rules
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Nov 13, 2014 01:36
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- tao of lmao
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dammit i shouldn't have accepted that but it's done so whatever
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Nov 13, 2014 01:37
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- ulvir
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I'll eat a probe if I was unknowingly cheating. even if I didn't win anything
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Nov 13, 2014 01:38
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- tao of lmao
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nah it's my bad i should have been paying more attention
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Nov 13, 2014 01:38
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- Ace of Baes
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you shoud errm probe yourself 
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Nov 13, 2014 01:39
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- ulvir
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maybe make the rules for wildcard entries and in general how new a submission must be a bit more explicit.
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Nov 13, 2014 01:40
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- ulvir
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or not. maybe its just me thats dumb and don't get rules
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Nov 13, 2014 01:41
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- tao of lmao
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DO NOT THREAD poo poo OTHER THREADS!! Try to find a way to work the listed topic into the topic of the thread you're posting in. You get one submission here for each topic. So while you can workshop your ideas into others' threads, please make sure you submit the best post you can for that subject. If myself or the mods find a post particularly funny or good, we hit the slots. Only posts made after the time of this post are eligible. Submissions will be accepted until Sunday, November 16th, 12:00 a.m. EST.
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Nov 13, 2014 01:45
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- tao of lmao
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i should have bolded it in the first place though so i'll go edit the op
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Nov 13, 2014 01:45
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- FluffieDuckie
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to be fair, that's a lot of words for a yobber to read
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Nov 13, 2014 01:45
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- tao of lmao
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jett posted:
During the events of May 18th, 2014, I was treated unfairly and otherwise abused in several ways. First, Prefuse is an overreacting dumb idiot. Second, the whole finger thing is old as gently caress. Third, forums poster I.N.R.I is a piece of poo poo. For these and various other reasons I was unjustly demodded and should have a chance to tell my side of the story.
holy loving poo poo i leaked the modqueue, an infraction that i was never explicitly told was against the rules and i only accidentally discovered was even slightly looked down upon when i stumbled across the hidden defunct ik forum. still, out of some intuitive sense of not being a complete loving idiot, i largely refrained from sharing the dark whisperings and demonic incantations that occur wherein, but when i saw what at least out of context appeared to be prefuse getting so mad at--oh the humanity--someone trolling fyad that he attempted to slap him with an effective permaban, i couldn't resist the temptation to make an exception on the following grounds: it was kinda funny. whereupon prefuse, who apparently has been demodded once already for the EXACT SAME THING, teleported to the byob thread and quietly escalated things. somehow or another the thread got moved to fyad, presumably so prefuse could have the pleasure of probating me personally. this effectively proves that he is a dumb baby whose butt i wouldn't touch with a ten-foot pole even if a gentle application of lubricant to the anus was the only thing that would make the difference between him successfully passing a log the size and hardness of a tree trunk or bleeding out from rectal tearing.
and let me just get some other poo poo straight here, even though it will be impossible to ever completely stamp this out, just a helpful little fact for all the virgins and "breeder"-haters around here: parenting is loving gross. it is full of dignity-destroying and uncomfortable poo poo, things that before you became a parent you would have sworn on your life you would never stoop to doing, but you have to do them just to maintain the basic hygeine and health of your kid, and things get even worse of the kid has health problems. hell, spreading aquaphor on the poop chute to aid the passing of a murderously painful turd under the full sanction of a gastroenterological nurse practitioner is hardly the sickest thing i've done. not once but twice i have pruriently stared at a vital signs monitor, watching the pulse and blood pressure of my newborn daughter trend in the general direction of zero because her heart was literally rigged to kill her a couple of weeks after birth. more than three years later i sat and shamelessly fondled my head (the one containing my skull) in my hands because i felt like passing out after learning that my son had a severe skin defect, totally unrelated to my daughter's heart defect, and i had earned a second ride on the rollercoaster through hell. but those things aren't very funny to recount in a comedy forum so excuse me, princess, that my 95%-capacity-at-all-times stress level randomly bubbled up one day and caused me to tactlessly share an anecdote about my kids being constipated. i still have to pray to god that i can raise my children healthy enough that they get to attend my funeral someday instead of the other way around, but they have trouble pooping, too. it's FUNNY.
and lastly and probably leastly, can we just temper with the ironic inri love for a second and be real here? inri's rap sheet clearly shows that he is, not only qualitatively but actually quantifiably, one of the shittiest posters on the forum, and his only entertainment value is that very shittiness. anyone else with his track record would be long since permabanned by now, but he can be relied upon to on a regular basis and it's amusing to watch his fried short-term memory lapse, whereupon he forgets that if he posts yet another thread in yospos about sucking steve jobs' dick he'll get probed AGAIN. so yeah, when i get multiple pm's from people upset that he basically posted baby animal gore fetish porn (politically charged baby animal gore fetish porn that it might have been :fuckkfc:), i figured yeah, that seems like it's worth requesting a ban for. plus banning inri is functionally equivalent to shooting a zombie in the pinkie toe as far as net effect goes.
In conclusion, while I am resigned to the fact that I did technically break a rule and my IK days are over, I still feel that many of the goings-on yesterday were a load of hosed up tiny dog poo poo. I don't wish Prefuse any ill will because I understand that he was simply doing what was necessary to maintain the high standards of the forum that it is his business to moderahhahahahaha. My son is much more regular lately without need of extraordinary intervention and quite frankly, my wife is way quicker to resort to digital aid than I am. Lastly, the forums just wouldn't be the same without that dancing butt-tree avatar, but really I don't think we have much to worry about there. Keep it chill, and unless someone with a red probe button (a button that I made possible to appear in BYOB, mind you) flips their poo poo over this post you'll probably be seeing me around.
Tell you what, I'll read the first paragraph of this epic loving rant, and the each of the following ones for every match-2 request until it's complete. THE PERSON WHO GETS ME TO COMPLETE READING THE RANT (the 5th request) WILL GET A SPECIAL PRIZE AT THE END OF THE WEEK Deal?
edit: because i can't count
tao of lmao fucked around with this message at 01:58 on Nov 13, 2014
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Nov 13, 2014 01:55
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- FluffieDuckie
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Tell you what, I'll read the first paragraph of this epic loving rant, and the each of the following ones for every match-2 request until it's complete. THE PERSON WHO GETS ME TO COMPLETE READING THE RANT (the 5th request) WILL GET A SPECIAL PRIZE AT THE END OF THE WEEK Deal?
edit: because i can't count
did you just edit your OP to say "of reasonable length"?? 
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Nov 13, 2014 02:01
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- tao of lmao
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Please, give me a chance to tell my side of the story...
http://vocaroo.com/i/s1KsUn0Vr83P
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Nov 13, 2014 02:01
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- tao of lmao
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not accepting that submission, please try again.
For your 2nd part:
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0z4F1h3V9Rt
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Nov 13, 2014 02:11
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- tao of lmao
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Full Bodied Flavor requested this post-reading from beyond the grave:
the basic Bwee control structure is (skim comment) -> (Is this person in my forum "clique"?) -> (If yes approve of whatever was said) -> (if no either ignore or insult them).
every time you see bwee get into an argument you see the same people show up to yell at the people yelling at bwee. it is nice that he has friends that 'has his back', but sometimes I think they overvalue the 'rough and tumble forum gang' gimmick. i still think he's funny occasionally though but dropping the fake gimmick and interacting like a normal person with people would be an improvement.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s02NE1MguskO
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Nov 13, 2014 02:34
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- FluffieDuckie
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this was beautiful julio
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Nov 13, 2014 02:36
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- Full-Bodied Flavor
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worth the probe 
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Nov 13, 2014 03:15
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- Veskit
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I love capitalism!! DM me for the best investing advice!
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IMPROVING PRODUCTIVITY IN THE WORKPLACE
gently caress me I need to get my team more onboard with sharepoint. My coworker is trying to roll out a 10 tab spreadsheet for one testing item that only happens over a 2 week period 
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Nov 13, 2014 03:41
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- bwatts
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i dont know what the gently caress that means so make another post and try again.
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Nov 13, 2014 03:56
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- Wertjoe
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can i get a wildcard for this nonsense in the detective thread?
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3681002&pagenumber=2#post437614629
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Nov 13, 2014 06:10
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- FluffieDuckie
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this man posted something hysterical in yospos in support of the cop thread in byob. i know it's kind of outside the boundaries of the rules, but i'd give him a spin just for the hell of it.
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Nov 13, 2014 06:12
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 30, 2024 19:27
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- HiipFire
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JENNY DEATH LIVES
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what category does this post fit under?
wildcard i guess
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Nov 13, 2014 07:21
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Nov 13, 2014 00:32
