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Steve Yun posted:Well I got a lot of hexagon cookies now if that's your thing I do kind of have a thing for space-filling shapes, yeah.
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Feb 15, 2015 10:08
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I got a new oven a while ago and was too cool to actually read the manual for it, and decided after a few weeks of not loving anything up that I'd make a carrot cake. Accidentally grilled that fucker for a good fifteen minutes before I smelled smoke, but the rest of it was under cooked so I kept cooking it because, hey, even bad carrot cake is pretty awesome and I can always cut off the burnt bits and cover it in icing. Somehow ended up with a carrot cake the consistency/density of a brownie, that tasted like gingerbread for some reason.
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Feb 15, 2015 11:16
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Yolo Swaggins Esq posted:I got a new oven a while ago and was too cool to actually read the manual for it, and decided after a few weeks of not loving anything up that I'd make a carrot cake. Accidentally grilled that fucker for a good fifteen minutes before I smelled smoke, but the rest of it was under cooked so I kept cooking it because, hey, even bad carrot cake is pretty awesome and I can always cut off the burnt bits and cover it in icing. That sounds like material for an "accidental miracles" cooking thread.
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Feb 15, 2015 21:20
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Vavrek posted:That sounds like material for an "accidental miracles" cooking thread. I dubbed it the identity crisis cake, and it was actually not bad. Didn't really work with the cream cheese frosting though. Gingerbread brownies are something I should attempt properly one day (and will probably encounter a bunch of stories for this thread on the process)
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Feb 16, 2015 10:35
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I was roasting a beef tenderloin last weekend and my thermometer was accidentally set to Celsius 
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Feb 16, 2015 17:44
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Crazyeyes posted:I was roasting a beef tenderloin last weekend and my thermometer was accidentally set to Celsius Oh christ. This is a sin against the meat gods. whatup, fellow beef destroyer sinner
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Feb 16, 2015 23:42
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Steve Yun posted:Well I got a lot of hexagon cookies now if that's your thing Settlers of Toll House
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Feb 17, 2015 18:00
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Neuroshima Snacks
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Feb 18, 2015 05:12
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Steve Yun posted:
I made cookies a while back and for some reason had those half-sticks of butter. I thought 8 of them was 2 sticks.... Put my cookies in the oven and they came out thinner than that with a big puddle of melted butter.
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Feb 19, 2015 16:40
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Not so much a disaster than a slight cockup, but... I had a hankering for something vaguely Indian tonight. I baked some swai to serve over curried rice, and during the last few minutes brushed on a healthy amount of Sultan brand Tikka-Kebab Chutney I'd stirred into some melted butter. The result when I pulled it out of the oven: nuclear bright green fish, all the way through. Tasty as hell, if you closed your eyes; but if I looked, my brain kept expecting it to taste like chopped broccoli, because that's exactly what it looked like. 
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Mar 1, 2015 04:01
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A few years ago a roommate decided he'd borrow my cast iron dutch oven to make tomato bisque. I don't have roommates anymore.
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Mar 1, 2015 05:24
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JacquelineDempsey posted:The result when I pulled it out of the oven: nuclear bright green fish, all the way through. Tasty as hell, if you closed your eyes; but if I looked, my brain kept expecting it to taste like chopped broccoli, because that's exactly what it looked like. There was a psych experiment years back where they died steak blue and stuck it under a colored light on people's plates while they ate it. After a period they'd remove the light and people would see the color of what they were eating and get sick from it. It's also probably why that colored ketchup for kids failed so miserably. Purple food is associated unconsciously with something being wrong with it.
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Mar 1, 2015 09:57
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Party Plane Jones posted:There was a psych experiment years back where they died steak blue and stuck it under a colored light on people's plates while they ate it. After a period they'd remove the light and people would see the color of what they were eating and get sick from it. It might trigger that "this food is rotten!" instinct.
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Mar 1, 2015 15:58
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Party Plane Jones posted:Purple food is associated unconsciously with something being wrong with it. Red onion, red cabbage, beetroot, blueberries, venison, aubergine, kale, blackberries, purple cauliflower, grapes, carrots, potatoes, beans, figs and octopus all come in a variety of purples.
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Mar 1, 2015 16:36
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Cavenagh posted:Red onion, red cabbage, beetroot, blueberries, venison, aubergine, kale, blackberries, purple cauliflower, grapes, carrots, potatoes, beans, figs and octopus all come in a variety of purples. quote:During one experiment in the early 1970s people were served an oddly tinted meal of steak and french fries that appeared normal beneath colored lights. Everyone thought the meal tasted fine until the lighting was changed. Once it became apparent that the steak was actually blue and the fries were green, some people became ill.  That's what their meal looked like when the colored light was taken away.
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Mar 1, 2015 20:53
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My mom was a perfect example of this with her aversion to blue food. She loved Carvel cakes with a passion. Any excuse to buy a Carvel cake, she would. (Dog's birthday? Let's get a Carvel, even though the dog can't eat it!) But if you brought home one with blue "flowers" on it, she would be absolutely repulsed, even though it's the same exact ice cream cake as the one with pink trim, just with a different food coloring added. That blue steak would've probably sent her into shock. To stay a bit more on topic, lemme share with you what starts as a dinner disaster and later becomes a cooking cockup. Valentines Day, sometime in the 90's. My boyfriend of the time worked at a video store (remember those?) and was working until 11pm on V Day. The plan was that I'd order an rear end-ton of Chinese food delivered, buy a lot of alcohol, and have everything ready when he came over after work. Eat Chinese, get drunk, have sex. (Ah, the simpler times when I was in college.) I was already set on the drink front. Called in the Chinese order about an hour before my bf was due to come over. I'm busy tidying up the house, changing the sheets, primping myself, etc. Half an hour later, I note it's about time to get my wallet so I can pay the delivery guy. (Remember, this is the 90's, so strictly cash.) Uh, where IS my wallet? I start tearing the house apart looking for it. Checking every coat, every pair of jeans I found, flinging poo poo all around the house. Digging in the couch, checking my car. No joy. I'm starting to freak out. Chinese is on the way, and I have no way to pay for it. The delivery guy shows up, and I'm in tears at having hosed up what should have been a nice romantic evening. "I have no money, I can't find my wallet." He looks sullen (I don't blame him) and drives off. 15 minutes later, my bf pulls up. Now I'm outright sobbing, trying to get out the story in between my hysterical blubbering. It's now past 11, and even if he wanted to pay, the Chinese place is closed. General Tso is off the table tonight. Nice fella that he was, he tells me it's okay, let's just find something to eat here and have a nice night. Thing is, I barely have anything in the house, being a poor college student. "Let's make grilled cheese," he suggests. Okay, fine, I can do that. Not very romantic, but I can do that. I calm down a little and start pre-heating the stove while buttering the bread. Suddenly, and for reasons I still don't know, the stove catches fire. My best guess is some leftover grease, from whatever I cooked last, caught on the electric burner and started it. It is my first kitchen fire ever, I'm already in hysterics over having ruined the evening, and yet I still have the presence of mind to find the nearest pot lid to slap over the fire. There's a big Farberware stockpot lid sitting on the adjacent kitchen table. I slap it on the burner, problem solved. And there, on the table, is my wallet. It wasn't unusual for me to put it and my keys and such there on that table. Why I put that drat lid down OVER it, I still don't know, guess I was in a hurry to clean and figured "well that'll go in the sink soon enough" then forgot about it in my haste. That was the year we had nothing but the Toblerone he brought and red wine for Valentine's Day. Could've been worse, I guess.
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Mar 1, 2015 22:11
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Party Plane Jones posted:There was a psych experiment years back where they died steak blue and stuck it under a colored light on people's plates while they ate it. After a period they'd remove the light and people would see the color of what they were eating and get sick from it. JacquelineDempsey posted:Valentines Day, sometime in the 90's.
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Mar 2, 2015 02:20
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Party Plane Jones posted:There was a psych experiment years back where they died steak blue and stuck it under a colored light on people's plates while they ate it. After a period they'd remove the light and people would see the color of what they were eating and get sick from it. JacquelineDempsey posted:My mom was a perfect example of this with her aversion to blue food. She loved Carvel cakes with a passion. Any excuse to buy a Carvel cake, she would. (Dog's birthday? Let's get a Carvel, even though the dog can't eat it!) But if you brought home one with blue "flowers" on it, she would be absolutely repulsed, even though it's the same exact ice cream cake as the one with pink trim, just with a different food coloring added. My mom wanted an all-blue party for her 5th birthday, and my grandmother went all out, including baking a totally blue cake and mixing up some blue ice cream. None of the other kids would even touch it. This would have been in 1952, so I have no idea about how common artificial colorings would have been, but apparently the blue cake caused tears. She's still mad about the whole thing. Whenever I'm around for her birthday, I bake her a big fuckoff blue cake. edit: We also drink about a bottle of red wine each and have bluish teeth!
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Mar 2, 2015 03:53
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bringmyfishback posted:This would have been in 1952, so I have no idea about how common artificial colorings would have been, but apparently the blue cake caused tears. Food coloring in the 50s was common as all hell; they actually had to take a bunch of them off the market because they found out that at the amount kids were consuming them it was making them sick.
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Mar 2, 2015 04:00
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Party Plane Jones posted:Food coloring in the 50s was common as all hell; they actually had to take a bunch of them off the market because they found out that at the amount kids were consuming them it was making them sick. Then they were probably right not to eat it!
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Mar 2, 2015 08:37
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Party Plane Jones posted:There was a psych experiment years back where they died steak blue and stuck it under a colored light on people's plates while they ate it. After a period they'd remove the light and people would see the color of what they were eating and get sick from it. Won't lie, I thought the purple ketchup was kinda rad, even if it was a stupid gimmick (I would've had R&D make it mustard yellow).
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Mar 3, 2015 06:25
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Mister Macys posted:Won't lie, I thought the purple ketchup was kinda rad, even if it was a stupid gimmick (I would've had R&D make it mustard yellow). From what I've read, the most recent colored ketchups fad failed not because nobody would eat them but because most of the color additives passed through entirely intact. "Hulk Green" ketchup was apparently the most notorious, especially in diapers.
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Mar 4, 2015 01:04
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Splizwarf posted:From what I've read, the most recent colored ketchups fad failed not because nobody would eat them but because most of the color additives passed through entirely intact. "Hulk Green" ketchup was apparently the most notorious, especially in diapers. Don't kinkshame.
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Mar 4, 2015 22:09
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Hmm I wonder how my 2010 stash of earthquake emergency prepper collapsed-society libertarian food is? Better check...
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Mar 5, 2015 13:29
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Steve Yun posted:Hmm I wonder how my 2010 stash of earthquake emergency prepper collapsed-society libertarian food is? Better check... Now, comrade. Do not be of wasting rations. Sergei here will gladly eat myassa if you are not of wanting. This brave can was made by our allies in the United States of Amerika, has braved the fascist dogs at sea and triumphantly crossed the Vloga under a hail of bullets to be with you. See, it is of bulging with excitement to be eaten! It should be honor to eat that СПЭМ. _______________________________________________________________________/ 
Missing Name fucked around with this message at 13:51 on Mar 5, 2015 |
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Mar 5, 2015 13:46
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Steve Yun posted:Hmm I wonder how my 2010 stash of earthquake emergency prepper collapsed-society libertarian food is? Better check... Looks like some tasty botulism there.
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Mar 6, 2015 07:47
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i've eaten spam far more bulged out than that. eat it you pussy hell on a camping trip we ate spam that we found had been punctured at some point. could have been weeks, could have been years. idk but we ate it and no one got sick(er)
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Mar 6, 2015 08:01
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I'm not falling for that one again 
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Mar 6, 2015 08:46
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Ahahaha I made spaghetti for my in-laws with tomato sauce from scratch and I just found out their version of garlic bread is to stick a piece of bread in the toaster and slather it with that godawful "garlic butter" poo poo from Papa Johns. The kind you get in a tiny little plastic container to stick your pizza in loving shoot me.
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Mar 21, 2015 16:12
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Could be worse. I had dinner at a friend of the family's house once and they just slathered the bread in butter and garlic salt. Tons of it. 
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Mar 24, 2015 11:27
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Yeah no, they do that too.  These are the same people that taught my husband from a young age that spaghetti is cooked to perfection when you throw it at the wall and it sticks. It took me three years to dissuade him from that notion; that spaghetti will stick regardless if it's cooked al dente or boiled to death.
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Mar 26, 2015 06:29
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kinmik posted:Ahahaha I made spaghetti for my in-laws with tomato sauce from scratch and I just found out their version of garlic bread is to stick a piece of bread in the toaster and slather it with that godawful "garlic butter" poo poo from Papa Johns. The kind you get in a tiny little plastic container to stick your pizza in loving shoot me. Korean garlic bread is sweet. It is not good. Your in-laws' recipe sounds better.
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Mar 26, 2015 10:24
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For some reason I thought wax paper was basically indestructible so I broiled some fish sauce marinated pork chops in my lovely old oven. The wax paper caught fire and the entire grody broiler interior was engulfed in flames for several long minutes and never worked again. Pork chops were stupendous though. I told my super about the broken broiler and he replaced the oven with a brand new one. Only took him 13 months. NYC rentals! 
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Mar 27, 2015 05:31
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Yeah, there is a difference between wax paper and parchment paper.
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Mar 27, 2015 12:37
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I'm sorry, I realize this isn't E/N, but my god my in-laws. I love them (in small doses) but sometimes they make me want to claw the skin off my face. Visited them for a couple of weeks and decided to make a huge dinner. Beef roast, chicken schnitzel, crispy salmon, roasted potatoes, and sauteed snap peas. Smoked up the whole kitchen, spent several hours on my feet. One hour before everything was ready, sister-in-law calls up her cousin and decides on her own that we're all going out to eat. At Chili's. Leftovers the next day were pretty baller though.
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Mar 28, 2015 09:22
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kinmik posted:I'm sorry, I realize this isn't E/N, but my god my in-laws. I love them (in small doses) but sometimes they make me want to claw the skin off my face. Visited them for a couple of weeks and decided to make a huge dinner. Beef roast, chicken schnitzel, crispy salmon, roasted potatoes, and sauteed snap peas. Smoked up the whole kitchen, spent several hours on my feet. One hour before everything was ready, sister-in-law calls up her cousin and decides on her own that we're all going out to eat. At Chili's. Did you tell them you had cooked all that poo poo? If they still went to Chili's then they must really hate your cooking.
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Mar 28, 2015 21:13
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kinmik posted:I'm sorry, I realize this isn't E/N, but my god my in-laws. I love them (in small doses) but sometimes they make me want to claw the skin off my face. Visited them for a couple of weeks and decided to make a huge dinner. Beef roast, chicken schnitzel, crispy salmon, roasted potatoes, and sauteed snap peas. Smoked up the whole kitchen, spent several hours on my feet. One hour before everything was ready, sister-in-law calls up her cousin and decides on her own that we're all going out to eat. At Chili's. Jesus, don't let people walk over you like this. I would have told her "I'm sorry you won't be staying for dinner, but I hope you and <cousin> enjoy your meal at Chili's". gently caress that.
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Mar 28, 2015 21:19
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Bob_McBob posted:Jesus, don't let people walk over you like this. I would have told her "I'm sorry you won't be staying for dinner, but I hope you and <cousin> enjoy your meal at Chili's". gently caress that. Seriously, jesus christ.
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Mar 28, 2015 21:55
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Had it been literally anyone else, I'd have done what you say. But my SIL is a unique case. She suffered a stroke several years ago and three years after, their family broke up in a bad way. As a result, she's gone downhill in physical and mental health. If one person disagrees with her, then it means the entire world does too. She'll fume and bitch and gripe and hold grudges for weeks and make sure she takes every goddamn one of you down with her. No, it was a far easier and gentler task to throw the lot in the fridge. Besides, not all the family went. Grandma stayed and ate it and she was pretty much the only one I was trying to impress. She talked about that meal to anyone who would listen. 
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Mar 29, 2015 01:36
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kinmik posted:Had it been literally anyone else, I'd have done what you say. But my SIL is a unique case. She suffered a stroke several years ago and three years after, their family broke up in a bad way. As a result, she's gone downhill in physical and mental health. If one person disagrees with her, then it means the entire world does too. She'll fume and bitch and gripe and hold grudges for weeks and make sure she takes every goddamn one of you down with her. Grandma sounds pretty cool. But drat even with that context I'd be hard pressed to suck it up there. You're a better person than I am
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Mar 29, 2015 05:01
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