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BogDew
Jun 14, 2006

E:\FILES>quickfli clown.fli

Gobbeldygook posted:

That would probably beat his current job. Gromit is a minor forum celebrity because his job requires he scrutinize child pornography.
Off cassette tapes of the future!
Though given he said people prefer their smut accessible I doubt anyone is storing it on drum memory as a precautionary measure.

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Humbug Scoolbus
Apr 25, 2008

The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.
Clapping Larry

Pham Nuwen posted:

My wife has bet me that I can't use a non-smartphone for two weeks. I'm therefore looking at getting a flip phone on EBay; what's the best one you guys can recommend? I'm literally looking for the very best in obsolete technology.

(If there's anything that runs Palm OS or can do laptop tethering, that's a bonus)

Look for a Handspring Treo. At least the 650

Pham Nuwen
Oct 30, 2010



I just ordered a new iPro phone from eBay for $25. It's a Hong Kong company that makes a bunch of phones and I've never heard of them before. It should be here next Monday and I'll post pics then.

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

Pham Nuwen posted:

I just ordered a new iPro phone from eBay for $25. It's a Hong Kong company that makes a bunch of phones and I've never heard of them before. It should be here next Monday and I'll post pics then.

Does it count if Stuart Ashen hasn't reviewed it?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSO1KWLGd50

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TUT39op2Pp8

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B2tVE7qRLwk

Tiberius Thyben
Feb 7, 2013

Gone Phishing


Gobbeldygook posted:

That would probably beat his current job. Gromit is a minor forum celebrity because his job requires he scrutinize child pornography.

You gotta do what you love.

spog
Aug 7, 2004

It's your own bloody fault.

Gobbeldygook posted:

That would probably beat his current job. Gromit is a minor forum celebrity because his job requires he scrutinize child pornography.

I feel you should have clarified that he does this for law enforcement purposes.

Not as, say, a reviewer.

LonsomeSon
Nov 22, 2009

A fishperson in an intimidating hat!

spog posted:

I feel you should have clarified that he does this for law enforcement purposes.

Not as, say, a reviewer.

Well, that's exactly what I assumed. Since it seems unlikely anyone could be a veteran child porn reviewer, post about it enough on the internet that random forum members mention it, and not have been arrested yet.

dissss
Nov 10, 2007

I'm a terrible forums poster with terrible opinions.

Here's a cat fucking a squid.

Humbug Scoolbus posted:

Look for a Handspring Treo. At least the 650

Isn't that kind of cheating?

Humbug Scoolbus
Apr 25, 2008

The scarlet letter was her passport into regions where other women dared not tread. Shame, Despair, Solitude! These had been her teachers, stern and wild ones, and they had made her strong, but taught her much amiss.
Clapping Larry

dissss posted:

Isn't that kind of cheating?

It's CDMA. The amount of time it takes to access anything online is measured in geologic terms.

Antifreeze Head
Jun 6, 2005

It begins
Pillbug
If you are going to go retro with a mobile phone, you may as well go WAY RETRO:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Binatone-Brick-Sim-Free-Mobile-Phone-White/dp/B00GN88E42

Uncle Enzo
Apr 28, 2008

I always wanted to be a Wizard

Pham Nuwen posted:

I just ordered a new iPro phone from eBay for $25. It's a Hong Kong company that makes a bunch of phones and I've never heard of them before. It should be here next Monday and I'll post pics then.

If you want a phone that will actually work, get a Nokia 220. It's 40 bucks, has conversation mode texts, a camera, makes calls+texts, a calendar, calculator, and a lot more. Bet you the phone you ordered from Hong Kong won't work on the frequencies of any North America cell network.

titties
May 10, 2012

They're like two suicide notes stuffed into a glitter bra

Pantech makes AT&T-branded flip phones, they cost like $10. I've never had a smartphone and I have somehow managed to survive with a flip phone because spending all of your time staring at your phone is for autists.

Proteus Jones
Feb 28, 2013



titties posted:

Pantech makes AT&T-branded flip phones, they cost like $10. I've never had a smartphone and I have somehow managed to survive with a flip phone because spending all of your time staring at your phone is for autists.

I bet you don't even own a TV, either.

Rev. Bleech_
Oct 19, 2004

~OKAY, WE'LL DRINK TO OUR LEGS!~

HMS Boromir posted:

Does anyone know of a site or blog or what have you that collects old predictions like these? I've seen a few and they're pretty entertaining, usually due to getting almost everything right with a few adorable exceptions.

not quite either, but I did find a precious "INTERNET BAD" thing in The Book of Lists 2, circa 1980

Pham Nuwen
Oct 30, 2010



Uncle Enzo posted:

Bet you the phone you ordered from Hong Kong won't work on the frequencies of any North America cell network.

Well, it is advertised as supporting frequencies in use by both T-Mobile and AT&T, so I don't foresee any issues there unless they were lying.

(Chinese hardware manufacturers lying is always a possibility)

titties
May 10, 2012

They're like two suicide notes stuffed into a glitter bra

flosofl posted:

I bet you don't even own a TV, either.

Don't be silly, everyone needs to watch game of thrones

BigPaddy
Jun 30, 2008

That night we performed the rite and opened the gate.
Halfway through, I went to fix us both a coke float.
By the time I got back, he'd gone insane.
Plus, he'd left the gate open and there was evil everywhere.


Rev. Bleech_ posted:

not quite either, but I did find a precious "INTERNET BAD" thing in The Book of Lists 2, circa 1980

In the 80's British Telecom went to Thatcher and said that if they were given rights to broadcast TV they would install fibre to every home in the UK. She told them to get stuffed so the same old copper is in place today only now getting slowly upgraded. Thanks Maggie.

Endymion FRS MK1
Oct 29, 2011

I don't know what this thing is, and I don't care. I'm just tired of seeing your stupid newbie av from 2011.

I wish he still did these.

Krispy Wafer
Jul 26, 2002

I shouted out "Free the exposed 67"
But they stood on my hair and told me I was fat

Grimey Drawer

Pham Nuwen posted:

Well, it is advertised as supporting frequencies in use by both T-Mobile and AT&T, so I don't foresee any issues there unless they were lying.

(Chinese hardware manufacturers lying is always a possibility)

It'll work. It might not work as well, especially with the data network. My not-made-for-the-American-market Sony could only do 2g data. But there will be enough similar frequencies for it to operate.

big parcheesi player
Apr 1, 2014

Also, I can kill you with my brain.

Pham Nuwen posted:

My wife has bet me that I can't use a non-smartphone for two weeks. I'm therefore looking at getting a flip phone on EBay; what's the best one you guys can recommend? I'm literally looking for the very best in obsolete technology.

(If there's anything that runs Palm OS or can do laptop tethering, that's a bonus)

As hard as you are trying to win this bet, I wonder what she is willing to give up if you win the bet...

Pham Nuwen
Oct 30, 2010



drgnwr1 posted:

As hard as you are trying to win this bet, I wonder what she is willing to give up if you win the bet...

It's not so much a bet as a challenge. My prize will be undeniable smugness, but I may challenge her to do the same thing if I succeed.

WorldWarWonderful
Jul 15, 2004
Eh?

Pham Nuwen posted:

It's not so much a bet as a challenge. My prize will be undeniable smugness, but I may challenge her to do the same thing if I succeed.

You could cheat and get a Nokia S60 (third edition) phone. It's technically a smartphone but they look like dumbphones! I had an N82 and loved it. Take a peek at the N81 if you're looking for a slider phone. I miss slider phones.

WorldWarWonderful has a new favorite as of 21:47 on Aug 4, 2015

SatansOnion
Dec 12, 2011

WorldWarWonderful posted:

You could cheat and get a Nokia S60 (third edition) phone. It's technically a smartphone but they look like dumbphones! I had an N82 and loved it. Take a peek at the N81 if you're looking for a slider phone. I miss slider phones.

My last cellphone was an ancient little brick of a Samsung (???) with a slide-out physical keyboard, which I rather adored; I only upgraded a few months ago, as one of my birthday gifts. It was my father's before it was mine, so it had to be at least a decade old, maybe more (my father does not have a comfortable relationship with modern electronics, bless him).

But...the predictive text on my new Android phone is really, really, really, ridiculously good. It's much easier, but I do sort of miss the tactile qualities of that physical keyboard.

SatansOnion has a new favorite as of 06:33 on Aug 5, 2015

Humphreys
Jan 26, 2013

We conceived a way to use my mother as a porn mule


I just ordered that Binatone phone....

Johnny Aztec
Jan 30, 2005

by Hand Knit

Humphreys posted:

I just ordered that Binatone phone....

Ring Ring Ring Ring Binatone?

Antifreeze Head
Jun 6, 2005

It begins
Pillbug

Humphreys posted:

I just ordered that Binatone phone....

It looks useful in its own way, but I just haven't pulled the trigger because it seems like a fairly large amount to dedicate to a joke when I have a smartphone with an unlimited data plan.

Let us know how it goes though.

GOTTA STAY FAI
Mar 24, 2005

~no glitter in the gutter~
~no twilight galaxy~
College Slice

SatansOnion posted:

But...the predictive text on my new Android phone is really, really, really, ridiculously good. It's much easier, but I do sort of miss the tactile qualities of that physical keyboard.

Predictive text and I just don't get along. Not sure what I'm doing wrong, but it never seems to know what the hell I want, so I always turn it off. I think I'm the obsolete technology. I see people living on their phones at all hours of day and night and I realize that I've had a smartphone for two years at this point and have used its "smart" features maybe twice in all that time. My previous phone was also a Samsung with a slide-out keyboard and I definitely still miss the tactile feedback of pressing the keys.

Woolie Wool
Jun 2, 2006


Gobbeldygook posted:

That would probably beat his current job. Gromit is a minor forum celebrity because his job requires he scrutinize child pornography.

Did he ever do an A/T thread? :stonk:

sweeperbravo
May 18, 2012

AUNT GWEN'S COLD SHAPE (!)

GOTTA STAY FAI posted:

My previous phone was also a Samsung with a slide-out keyboard and I definitely still miss the tactile feedback of pressing the keys.

I mean I think I could get used to a touchscreen and would like having the option for, say, selecting items on the screen/playing games and poo poo. But texting is what I primarily use a phone for, so having to handicap myself on that for a while seems like a bummer.

It's getting to the point though where I need to get one, because I'm tired of not being able to read messages from people because they included an emoji and it garbled the rest of the message and deleted over half of it (which is something most people have been cool about when I've explained it to them but it's kind of an awkward conversation to have with somebody you need to interact with for, say, business purposes or whatever), or having my inbox freak out because someone included me in a group message and I'm running out of room for "special media messages" which for some reason the group message gets classified as. I also wouldn't mind being able to take better quality pictures.

:smith: I just get so used to things being one way and really, really hate having to adapt to a big change with something I use so often and so personally. I know, I know, I'm the obsolete and failed technology.

peter gabriel
Nov 8, 2011

Hello Commandos
It's like complaining that a remote is harder to find than a TV so we shouldn't have remote controlled TVs

Computer viking
May 30, 2011
Now with less breakage.

Maybe you are the target niche for the physical-keyboard blackberries?

ElwoodCuse
Jan 11, 2004

we're puttin' the band back together
How does Blackberry still exist? Who uses them unless their job requires them to for whatever reason?

sweeperbravo
May 18, 2012

AUNT GWEN'S COLD SHAPE (!)

peter gabriel posted:

It's like complaining that a remote is harder to find than a TV so we shouldn't have remote controlled TVs

Why? It's more like not being able to feel the buttons on my remote so I have to look at it instead of just being able to rely on muscle memory. It's not a *huge* deal for something like that, but when it's something that makes up a good amount of my communication, it matters to me. Imagine if you suddenly found yourself without the ability to touch type. Would you not find that a setback?

Besides, I don't know where you're getting the idea that because I don't like touch screens, I feel no one else should have them :confused:


Computer viking posted:

Maybe you are the target niche for the physical-keyboard blackberries?
Yes, probably! I will be looking into things like that. The Nokia posted on the other page was pretty inviting.

beep-beep car is go
Apr 11, 2005

I can just eyeball this, right?



ElwoodCuse posted:

How does Blackberry still exist? Who uses them unless their job requires them to for whatever reason?

You answered your own question. Government loves blackberries A: because they invested in the BES back when it was The Thing and B: they hate hate hate change.

peter gabriel
Nov 8, 2011

Hello Commandos

sweeperbravo posted:


Besides, I don't know where you're getting the idea that because I don't like touch screens, I feel no one else should have them :confused:


I don't think that though :)

My experience was to get a Blackberry with a slide out keyboard ages ago, then I got a Note 2 a couple of years back and every hang up I had about touch screens wasn't true anymore, they moved on a lot.
I think it's just one of those things (for me definitely) where you have to take the plunge, live with if for a bit and then one day realise you don;t worry about it anymore.
The benefits outweigh the initial negatives in no time.

pienipple
Mar 20, 2009

That's wrong!
There always seems to be at least one slider phone option when I check virgin's phone options. I used to have a Samsung Intercept and it was ok for a while but never updated past android 2.3 and had a slow processor and very limited ram and storage.

sweeperbravo
May 18, 2012

AUNT GWEN'S COLD SHAPE (!)

peter gabriel posted:

I don't think that though :)

My experience was to get a Blackberry with a slide out keyboard ages ago, then I got a Note 2 a couple of years back and every hang up I had about touch screens wasn't true anymore, they moved on a lot.
I think it's just one of those things (for me definitely) where you have to take the plunge, live with if for a bit and then one day realise you don;t worry about it anymore.
The benefits outweigh the initial negatives in no time.

Yeah, I know that that's true, the adjustment thing- I just never believe it, no matter how many times I've been through it in the past, until it happens.

I think part of it is also that- and this is going off on somewhat of a tangent- I have a (admittedly irrational) predisposition against smartphones just because of what socially acceptable cell phone ettiquette has become, and I know it was true even when people just had flip phones but I didn't notice it so much then. Nothing quite like going out to meet up with a friend you're excited to catch up with who you haven't seen in ages, only for them to plop their phone down on the table the minute you sit down together and pay more attention to people they're texting, checking facebook/instagram etc, than actually interacting with you. Dude if you'd rather talk to people who aren't me, don't waste my time by agreeing to meet up in person. :smith:

I guess part of me is afraid I'll become one of those people. I don't *think* I will, since I think I would have already been doing that with the phone I have now if I had that potential. The ability to just leave your phone in your pocket has no correlation with how powerful the phone is, but with how powerful your will is. Again, I know this is all irrational, but that's the immediate association that comes to mind.

BogDew
Jun 14, 2006

E:\FILES>quickfli clown.fli
Have the best of both worlds! :getin:


The Samsung Galaxy Golden.

Yes that's an actual phone with dual AMOLED screens that operate as both a touch screen phone or a flip phone and is likely the cause of many a butt dial.
Samsung and other manufactures often release all sorts of one-off curios that never really see further than Korea.

I kind of miss the days of Nokia's devil may care insanity with their designs. If there was a niche, they attempted to capture it in any way.
Fold out keyboards, phones shaped like a leaf, mini-phones, phones that converted into mini music players or camcorders.

Who loves lights!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acBWxbqXEeI

This little rave machine even came with a "fun shell" which flashed LED messages when waved around.

peter gabriel
Nov 8, 2011

Hello Commandos

sweeperbravo posted:

Yeah, I know that that's true, the adjustment thing- I just never believe it, no matter how many times I've been through it in the past, until it happens.

I think part of it is also that- and this is going off on somewhat of a tangent- I have a (admittedly irrational) predisposition against smartphones just because of what socially acceptable cell phone ettiquette has become, and I know it was true even when people just had flip phones but I didn't notice it so much then. Nothing quite like going out to meet up with a friend you're excited to catch up with who you haven't seen in ages, only for them to plop their phone down on the table the minute you sit down together and pay more attention to people they're texting, checking facebook/instagram etc, than actually interacting with you. Dude if you'd rather talk to people who aren't me, don't waste my time by agreeing to meet up in person. :smith:

I guess part of me is afraid I'll become one of those people. I don't *think* I will, since I think I would have already been doing that with the phone I have now if I had that potential. The ability to just leave your phone in your pocket has no correlation with how powerful the phone is, but with how powerful your will is. Again, I know this is all irrational, but that's the immediate association that comes to mind.

I didn't have a mobile from 2000 - about 2010 out of choice so I get what you are saying, i was basically forced into it because of work.
I do like the thing now though, although I don't use it for much more than calls / texts / Gear VR :v:

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Proteus Jones
Feb 28, 2013



Shampoo posted:

You answered your own question. Government loves blackberries A: because they invested in the BES back when it was The Thing and B: they hate hate hate change.

It's because they're one the few smart phones that is FIPS-2 compliant which is requirement for government communication and data systems.

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