Mafia Discussion Thread: Calling Each Other Idiots in the Name of Fun

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > Mafia Discussion Thread: Calling Each Other Idiots in the Name of Fun

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Byers2142: May 5, 2011; Imagine I said something deep here...

Magnus Gallant posted:

Hah before computers I highly doubt it was easy.

Local, it was. It took about a day and had a fee associated (which is part of what the application fee used to cover), but they'd call it in, a clerk would look to see if there was a criminal record filed locally, and return the results. It was harder to cross reference with other jurisdictions and the feds, sure, but say county or smaller they could get it pretty quickly.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:17

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 06:18

Byers2142: May 5, 2011; Imagine I said something deep here...

I realized that after I posted it sounded like I was piling on; I'm not. It's not the Internet's fault, it's the landlords.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:19

TMMadman: Sep 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

EccoRaven posted:

I am at least half your age and don't remember a time without the internet and this is mychildhood.txt you old whiner.

YOU drat KIDS BETTER GET OFF MY LAWN! :argh:

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:21

JakeP: Apr 27, 2003; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Lipstick Apathy

Maybe if you are upfront about everything before you pay the application fee they could tell you ahead of time whether or not it will affect your application? (I really don't know)

Alternatively rent from a private rentor maybe?

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:22

Look Under The Rock: Oct 20, 2007; you can't take the sky from me

Opopanax posted:

You have to pay to apply to move into an apartment? That sounds scummy

I paid an application fee for the place I'm currently living, and a deposit before having even been taken through one of the units. I spent two weeks in a panic, terrified I was being scammed, but it was legit and now I have a really nice apartment with not enough storage space for all my dude's books.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:38

Byers2142: May 5, 2011; Imagine I said something deep here...

TMMadman posted:

YOU drat KIDS BETTER GET OFF MY LAWN!

Lawns are so 20th century. I text kids to get off my green space.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:40

EccoRaven: Aug 15, 2004; there is only one hell:
the one we live in now

application fees and deposits are the norm for actual genuine apartment rentals with leases and all that. sure it's a little dumb but in the grand scheme of things the cost is low and as long as you have good credit/are not a felon it's just an administrative hoop.

If you are one of those two things well.

Magnus have you tried apartments that look a lot more informal (e.g. sublets, "some college kids who don't know how to manage property," etc.)?

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:41

Byers2142: May 5, 2011; Imagine I said something deep here...

Look Under The Rock posted:

I paid an application fee for the place I'm currently living, and a deposit before having even been taken through one of the units. I spent two weeks in a panic, terrified I was being scammed, but it was legit and now I have a really nice apartment with not enough storage space for all my dude's books.

Application fees are a holdover that aren't needed any longer (there's little overhead to screening applicants now), but are still common and likely not going anywhere. Once a fee is accepted as common, it's very hard to make that fee go away once it is no longer needed.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:42

Magnus Gallant: Mar 9, 2010; by Lowtax; Grimey Drawer

EccoRaven posted:

Magnus have you tried apartments that look a lot more informal (e.g. sublets, "some college kids who don't know how to manage property," etc.)?

That's what I was looking at. I was going to take over someone's lease for them but I had to apply and then I was denied after an hour.

I have called other places and their polices are just "if your crime happened within x number of arbitrary years then we don't rent to you". Doesn't matter if it was a low level felony or non violent. Doesn't matter

Pretty funny that george Zimmerman a dude who straight up murdered someone finds it easier than I do to rent an apartment

# ? Aug 19, 2015 17:55

Byers2142: May 5, 2011; Imagine I said something deep here...

Magnus Gallant posted:

That's what I was looking at. I was going to take over someone's lease for them but I had to apply and then I was denied after an hour.

I have called other places and their polices are just "if your crime happened within x number of arbitrary years then we don't rent to you". Doesn't matter if it was a low level felony or non violent. Doesn't matter

Pretty funny that george Zimmerman a dude who straight up murdered someone finds it easier than I do to rent an apartment

I can't believe I'm suggesting this, but have you tried reaching out to the police? Their POs might know the local apartment complexes that are willing to rent to people with a record, since they'd need to have that information available for parolees at the end of their sentence.

If not the police, depending on where you are some cities have rehabilitation advocacy groups that work to promote the idea that once you serve your time/pay your fine, your debt is clean and you should not be ostracized for what's happened. If there's a group like that in your area, maybe they would know who you can talk to for finding a rental.

Just two thoughts, in my opinion the whole zero tolerance thing most landlords seem to have is stupid. It should be contextual, not universal.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:01

CCKeane: Jan 28, 2008; my shit posts don't die, they multiply

I'm sick today mafia thread. You should all give me lots of sympathy as I whine like a baby.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:05

Magnus Gallant: Mar 9, 2010; by Lowtax; Grimey Drawer

Byers2142 posted:

I can't believe I'm suggesting this, but have you tried reaching out to the police? Their POs might know the local apartment complexes that are willing to rent to people with a record, since they'd need to have that information available for parolees at the end of their sentence.

If not the police, depending on where you are some cities have rehabilitation advocacy groups that work to promote the idea that once you serve your time/pay your fine, your debt is clean and you should not be ostracized for what's happened. If there's a group like that in your area, maybe they would know who you can talk to for finding a rental.

Just two thoughts, in my opinion the whole zero tolerance thing most landlords seem to have is stupid. It should be contextual, not universal.

Yeah I did look into those avenues briefly yesterday but those places didn't have anything near the area that I work at that I could find.

I would call my PO but he's not really my PO anymore as I'm on upsupervised provation and he didn't return my calls asking him how I was supposed to get off probation or if I am already off probation. Probation should be done this month but maybe not? I really have no clue and I can't find out because the "person" I check in with is a website that looks like it's from the 90's and gives me no feedback other than "submitted"

So who knows.

The whole thing is upsetting me very much and there's not a whole lot I can do about it right now.

Sorry I insulted the Internet mafia thread lol

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:10

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

Look Under The Rock posted:

I've had MMMBop stuck in my head for a solid hour and am trying to drown it out with Warren Zevon and it's not working

A quality decision.

TMMadman posted:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOO Werewolves of London.

Oh come on, that is basic-rear end beginner level. At least dig down a bit. Sentimental Hygiene, Wild Age, Tenderness on the Block, Boom Boom Mancini, Play it All Night Long, he's got a zillion better tunes than that.

Magnus Gallant posted:

Yeah I did look into those avenues briefly yesterday but those places didn't have anything near the area that I work at that I could find.

I would call my PO but he's not really my PO anymore as I'm on upsupervised provation and he didn't return my calls asking him how I was supposed to get off probation or if I am already off probation. Probation should be done this month but maybe not? I really have no clue and I can't find out because the "person" I check in with is a website that looks like it's from the 90's and gives me no feedback other than "submitted"

So who knows.

The whole thing is upsetting me very much and there's not a whole lot I can do about it right now.

Sorry I insulted the Internet mafia thread lol

That is some poo poo-rear end police work, and it sucks. You might want to actually go to the dude's office.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:20

Lumpen: Apr 2, 2004; I'd been happy, and I was happy still. For all to be accomplished,
for me to feel less lonely,
all that remained to hope
was that on the day of my execution
there should be a huge crowd of spectators and that they should
greet me with howls of execration.; Plaster Town Cop

If I were a property owner I wouldn't rent to someone with a record either, if I had other applicants willing to pay the same money. If I were a renter, I would hope my landlord would have that sort of policy regarding who the neighboring units get rented to.

In actuality I am a homeowner in a lovely neighborhood of Indianapolis with meth deals going down on the porches of three different houses across the street on just my block on a constant basis, screaming fights down the street in the middle of most nights, and my bike got stolen from my garage within 15 minutes when I briefly forgot to close the door. The house right next to mine was abandoned a year and a half ago and is now partially decayed with the roof falling off, and crackheads keep breaking into it as well as squatting in the detached garage.

My house itself is nice though, and the upside is that we spend more on groceries than the mortgage each month.

In conclusion, Magnus please buy the house next to me. You can probably afford it.

Lumpen fucked around with this message at 18:27 on Aug 19, 2015

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:24

Byers2142: May 5, 2011; Imagine I said something deep here...

Lumpen posted:

If I were a property owner I wouldn't rent to someone with a record either, if I had other applicants willing to pay the same money. If I were a renter, I would hope my landlord would have that sort of policy regarding who the neighboring units get rented to.

In actuality I am a homeowner in a lovely neighborhood of Indianapolis with meth deals going down on the porches of three different houses across the street on just my block on a constant basis, screaming fights down the street in the middle of most nights, and my bike got stolen from my garage within 15 minutes when I briefly forgot to close the door. The house right next to mine was abandoned a year and a half ago and is now partially decayed with the roof falling off, and crackheads keep breaking into it as well as squatting in the detached garage.

My house itself is nice though, and the upside is that we spend more on groceries than the mortgage each month.

In conclusion, Magnus please buy the house next to me. You can probably afford it.

I demand you make a LumpenList of your neighbors, now.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:28

Magnus Gallant: Mar 9, 2010; by Lowtax; Grimey Drawer

Lumpen posted:

If I were a property owner I wouldn't rent to someone with a record either, if I had other applicants willing to pay the same money. If I were a renter, I would hope my landlord would have that sort of policy regarding who the neighboring units get rented to.

In actuality I am a homeowner in a lovely neighborhood of Indianapolis with meth deals going down on the porches of three different houses across the street on just my block on a constant basis, screaming fights down the street in the middle of most nights, and my bike got stolen from my garage within 15 minutes when I briefly forgot to close the door. The house right next to mine was abandoned a year and a half ago and is now partially decayed with the roof falling off, and crackheads keep breaking into it as well as squatting in the detached garage.

My house itself is nice though, and the upside is that we spend more on groceries than the mortgage each month.

In conclusion, Magnus please buy the house next to me. You can probably afford it.

I would love to do that haha. I thought you were down in Florida? At least you're not down there anymore

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:48

Opopanax: Aug 8, 2007; I HEX YE!!!

EccoRaven posted:

application fees and deposits are the norm for actual genuine apartment rentals with leases and all that. sure it's a little dumb but in the grand scheme of things the cost is low and as long as you have good credit/are not a felon it's just an administrative hoop.

If you are one of those two things well.

Magnus have you tried apartments that look a lot more informal (e.g. sublets, "some college kids who don't know how to manage property," etc.)?

Deposits I understand, application fees are something I've never run into and sound absurd. Mags move to Canada

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:49

Asiina: Apr 26, 2011; No going back; Grimey Drawer

You can still get turned down here for basically no reason, but at least it doesn't cost you anything.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:53

Magnus Gallant: Mar 9, 2010; by Lowtax; Grimey Drawer

Allen Wren posted:

A quality decision.

Oh come on, that is basic-rear end beginner level. At least dig down a bit. Sentimental Hygiene, Wild Age, Tenderness on the Block, Boom Boom Mancini, Play it All Night Long, he's got a zillion better tunes than that.

That is some poo poo-rear end police work, and it sucks. You might want to actually go to the dude's office.

I agree it does suck, but he's a nice guy and it's not his fault really. Basically every probation officer has like 100+ people that are their probationers. Each of these people all have different needs and all cases are completely different. PO's see you once a month. All they do is ask if you still have a job and are still living in the same address and if you're colored or an rear end in a top hat then they piss test you.

I was piss tested like 4 times over 18 months. The only reason I did it 4 times was because in the course of 18 months I had 4 different probation officers and had to report to 4 different offices around my county.

Basically your PO does not know who you are why you're there or what you need to succeed. PO turnover is also very high, my first two left because they got better jobs and my last two were also not planning on being there very long.

So basically POs are both overworked and unmotivated. So they don't do good work and it doesn't affect anyone other than criminals and if they didn't want their lives to be negatively affected by government incompetency well then by golly they shouldn't have done the crime.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:53

Magnus Gallant: Mar 9, 2010; by Lowtax; Grimey Drawer

I had a similar experience with the guy I had to go see because the government assigned me to a drug rehab course except that guy was even more overworked (had over 250 clients he had to meet with/schedule things for every month). Basically since no one wants to pay taxes to fund government programs the government can't afford to have any workers there to do their job well.

The U.S. Is pretty broken in my opinion but that's just my opinion.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:55

Magnus Gallant: Mar 9, 2010; by Lowtax; Grimey Drawer

Opopanax posted:

Deposits I understand, application fees are something I've never run into and sound absurd. Mags move to Canada

I would but actually felons can't enter Canada. Lol

# ? Aug 19, 2015 18:59

Lumpen: Apr 2, 2004; I'd been happy, and I was happy still. For all to be accomplished,
for me to feel less lonely,
all that remained to hope
was that on the day of my execution
there should be a huge crowd of spectators and that they should
greet me with howls of execration.; Plaster Town Cop

Byers2142 posted:

I demand you make a LumpenList of your neighbors, now.

Quiet next door neighbors who never interact but regularly mow.
Nice disabled lady who asks about my kids
Pair of mid 20s hipsters who have a guitar and a hybrid
"Patty" Gossipy middle aged lady who wears too-revealing clothes and is only drunk sometimes. Keeps yard nice and shares garden tools.
"Pierre" Old guy whose daughter robbed him of all valuables to sell for drugs, kicked her out then let her and her boyfriend return and live on front porch, now site of frequent shady dealings during the day. Two nights ago this house had 6 cop cars, 2 firetrucks, and an ambulance there at 10 pm, police report says someone was DOA. Might have been ol' Pierre. Appeared to have a house party the next night.
Directly across street, always-shirtless methman "Todd" who drinks one case per day of natty ice and the fat woman "Big Momma" who lives with him who never wears shoes, with mysterious young adults coming and going around their porch all the time and sometimes being loudly chased away being called "crackwhore!" Frequent bonfires in yard.
The house with all the screaming and fighting late at night about who is actually a bitch and whose man don't want you. And also get the gently caress out of here, no you get the gently caress out of here.
Duplex with blacked out windows that always has a huge dude standing guard on the porch all the time and random raggedy people constantly going in and coming out to lurch down the street. Frequent loud cars bumping bass outside at night. Feel sorry for the kids sometimes seen here.
Abandoned house right next door, falling apart, overgrown jungle yard, spawns trash and brown bags with small empty alcohol bottles, had been boarded up now but still probably full of squatting crackhead murderhobos.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 19:03

Opopanax: Aug 8, 2007; I HEX YE!!!

Magnus Gallant posted:

I would but actually felons can't enter Canada. Lol

I'll dig you a tunnel, np

# ? Aug 19, 2015 19:07

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

This wasn't bothering me earlier, but now it is, why the poo poo would you post in the thread of a recruiting game to be like "I'm going to be distracted and lovely, but you can add me if you want"

# ? Aug 19, 2015 19:10

EccoRaven: Aug 15, 2004; there is only one hell:
the one we live in now

snip

EccoRaven fucked around with this message at 10:09 on Mar 27, 2020

# ? Aug 19, 2015 19:23

Lumpen: Apr 2, 2004; I'd been happy, and I was happy still. For all to be accomplished,
for me to feel less lonely,
all that remained to hope
was that on the day of my execution
there should be a huge crowd of spectators and that they should
greet me with howls of execration.; Plaster Town Cop

Magnus Gallant posted:

I would love to do that haha. I thought you were down in Florida? At least you're not down there anymore

We were just in Florida for 3 months last year for a special work project my wife was on. We lived in a nice apartment there with a very nice little-used pool, right on an inlet that I could kayak (included) out to the ocean through. All the cars around were shiny luxury sports cars. All the people around were rich and very very old. It was Florida.

It was cool of RollsRoyce to send us down there for a while, but I prefer where I live now, to be honest!

# ? Aug 19, 2015 19:24

Magnus Gallant: Mar 9, 2010; by Lowtax; Grimey Drawer

Lumpen posted:

We were just in Florida for 3 months last year for a special work project my wife was on. We lived in a nice apartment there with a very nice little-used pool, right on an inlet that I could kayak (included) out to the ocean through. All the cars around were shiny luxury sports cars. All the people around were rich and very very old. It was Florida.

It was cool of RollsRoyce to send us down there for a while, but I prefer where I live now, to be honest!

Haha yeah Florida is a poo poo hole. sea kayaking would be fun.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 19:36

EccoRaven: Aug 15, 2004; there is only one hell:
the one we live in now

snip

EccoRaven fucked around with this message at 10:09 on Mar 27, 2020

# ? Aug 19, 2015 20:06

Asiina: Apr 26, 2011; No going back; Grimey Drawer

We're all on islands.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 20:08

imgay: May 12, 2014; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Not true, the people of Atlantis live under the sea

# ? Aug 19, 2015 20:09

Pinterest Mom: Jun 9, 2009

i'm moving from a city-sized island to a province-sized island soon

# ? Aug 19, 2015 20:11

Opopanax: Aug 8, 2007; I HEX YE!!!

I'm on an island, an actual one. Also there's a small island near here that's for sale but my wife won't let me buy it.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 20:16

CCKeane: Jan 28, 2008; my shit posts don't die, they multiply

I have never had a permanent address that was not on an island.

I fear the mainland and the bears that exist out there!

# ? Aug 19, 2015 20:19

George Kansas: Sep 1, 2008; preface all my posts with this

CCKeane posted:

I have never had a permanent address that was not on an island.

I fear the mainland and the bears that exist out there!

this is reasonable tbh

# ? Aug 19, 2015 20:58

Byers2142: May 5, 2011; Imagine I said something deep here...

imgay posted:

Not true, the people of Atlantis live under the sea

# ? Aug 19, 2015 21:26

Opopanax: Aug 8, 2007; I HEX YE!!!

CCKeane posted:

I have never had a permanent address that was not on an island.

I fear the mainland and the bears that exist out there!

There are bears on islands, too.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 21:44

Rarity: Oct 21, 2010; ~*4 LIFE*~

Rarity posted:

I was thinking I'd just mention Orange is the New Black and see if she goes nuts for Ruby Rose

...Actually, that could work.

Update: I tried this. She called her "stunning"

Verdict: Annoyingly inconclusive :argh:

# ? Aug 19, 2015 21:48

Opopanax: Aug 8, 2007; I HEX YE!!!

Rarity posted:

Update: I tried this. She called her "stunning"

Verdict: Annoyingly inconclusive

Play Truth or Dare with her

# ? Aug 19, 2015 21:49

hexwren: Feb 27, 2008

Opopanax posted:

There are bears on islands, too.

We all live on islands.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 21:50

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# ? Apr 26, 2024 06:18

TMMadman: Sep 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

Rarity posted:

Update: I tried this. She called her "stunning"

Verdict: Annoyingly inconclusive

New plan: make the peace sign with your hand. Put one finger on each side of your mouth. Stick out your tongue and wiggle it at her. Raise your eyebrow.

# ? Aug 19, 2015 21:50

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Traditional Games > Mafia Discussion Thread: Calling Each Other Idiots in the Name of Fun

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