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EBB
Feb 15, 2005

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beanieson
Sep 25, 2008

I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av

oh poo poo this is my jam right here

Eugene V. Dubstep
Oct 4, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!

Booblord Zagats posted:

That's why you never use butane for your car bomb

It's a bastard gas.

Mad Dragon
Feb 29, 2004


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9N3iFqElOG0
:derp:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BEMMGZ5i0aQ

Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009

that bitch was high af

Tiny Timbs
Sep 6, 2008

I have a cutting board that I use to prepare my food. She intentionally sets cat food on it and actually force feeds the cats into eating off of it just to make me upset because she knows I have nowhere to go.

I am ashamed of myself for winding up in this situation. I am a grown man with a drug and alcohol problem. My mother has raised two alcoholics who will both be spending years behind bars for DWI.

I am dead serious when I say that my mother has since we were children had an increasing disregard for her children's well being, but she is also a retired RN and school teacher. I grew up being treated like an animal and have thus become one.
I almost got away from her but wound up with a closet case hoarder who destroyed my life because I couldn't make the hard choice to break our home and take my son away from her, but she had no problem amassing junk and trash, and then extorting child support from me - which amounted to her basically kidnappings my son.

When my mom took me from my dad she moved us into her mothers house. Her mother was an animal hiarder , and my childhood was filled with the smell of dog feces and the taste of cockroaches is my mouth as I slept on the couch with my mouth agape due to the allergies.

Mad Dragon
Feb 29, 2004

:stare: which subreddit is that from? Raised by narcissists?

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers





PINING 4 PORKINS posted:

I have a cutting board that I use to prepare my food. She intentionally sets cat food on it and actually force feeds the cats into eating off of it just to make me upset because she knows I have nowhere to go.

I am ashamed of myself for winding up in this situation. I am a grown man with a drug and alcohol problem. My mother has raised two alcoholics who will both be spending years behind bars for DWI.

I am dead serious when I say that my mother has since we were children had an increasing disregard for her children's well being, but she is also a retired RN and school teacher. I grew up being treated like an animal and have thus become one.
I almost got away from her but wound up with a closet case hoarder who destroyed my life because I couldn't make the hard choice to break our home and take my son away from her, but she had no problem amassing junk and trash, and then extorting child support from me - which amounted to her basically kidnappings my son.

When my mom took me from my dad she moved us into her mothers house. Her mother was an animal hiarder , and my childhood was filled with the smell of dog feces and the taste of cockroaches is my mouth as I slept on the couch with my mouth agape due to the allergies.

yeah none of this ever happened except maybe his mother threatening to let the cat eat off his board

Tiny Timbs
Sep 6, 2008

https://www.reddit.com/r/hoarding/comments/3jypv2/my_mom_hoards_animals_and_is_wasting_my/

Godholio
Aug 28, 2002

Does a bear split in the woods near Zheleznogorsk?

FIDEL CASHFLOW posted:

i only count it if i finish and i was way passed obliterated drunk

This is the rapiest thing I've ever read.

Comrade Blyatlov
Aug 4, 2007


should have picked four fingers





Wait if it's a guy and a girl then the guy is the rapist. If it's two guys who's the raper and who's the rapee?

Duzzy Funlop
Jan 13, 2010

Hi there, would you like to try some spicy products?
It's the top, dummy

Nostalgia4Butts
Jun 1, 2006

WHERE MY HOSE DRINKERS AT

Two Finger posted:

Wait if it's a guy and a girl then the guy is the rapist. If it's two guys who's the raper and who's the rapee?

both are the rapist, obviously

Duzzy Funlop
Jan 13, 2010

Hi there, would you like to try some spicy products?
I mean, unless you somehow forcibly sit your rear end down on his poo poo or something, I'm not sure.

Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009

Duzzy Funlop posted:

I mean, unless you somehow forcibly sit your rear end down on his poo poo or something, I'm not sure.

of course the kraut is gonna bring up scheiße play

Duzzy Funlop
Jan 13, 2010

Hi there, would you like to try some spicy products?
Please don't schame

FIDEL CASHFLOW
Oct 13, 2009

Godholio posted:

This is the rapiest thing I've ever read.

ya that does come across rly weird

USMC503
Jan 15, 2012

For satisfactory performance while under the effects of hostile enemy alcohol.
I am pretty loving drunk. My house looks like a rednecks front yard covered in Busch Light cans.

gently caress your mother, unless you're n4i, in which case gently caress your father.

ElMaligno
Dec 31, 2004

Be Gay!
Do Crime!

EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:

just watched Rambo 3 for the first time



:laffo:

Thats a later, edited version. The original is better and funnier.


LMAO

Force de Fappe
Nov 7, 2008

Russian dashcams 4eva

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wnsdc7cTPuU


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j58HfrGRr5s

Mike-o
Dec 25, 2004

Now I'm in your room
And I'm in your bed


Grimey Drawer
Haven't smoked weed since forever ago. Was drinking and smoking cigarettes with my vietnam vet buddy neighbor. Took two hits off his bong and I was loving out. Collapsed into bed and didn't wake up until 7am.

KirbyKhan
Mar 20, 2009



Soiled Meat
It is legit fun to smoke up with old people.

Arrath
Apr 14, 2011


KirbyKhan posted:

It is legit fun to smoke up with old people.

ElMaligno
Dec 31, 2004

Be Gay!
Do Crime!

http://i.imgur.com/CGLwlev.gif:nws:

US Berder Patrol
Jul 11, 2006

oorah

somebody make a crossfit joke

Duzzy Funlop
Jan 13, 2010

Hi there, would you like to try some spicy products?
I have this high-energy swedish student living next to me, he can rap, doesn't have a swedish accent, breakdances and smokes weed like it's going out of stock.

He's also EXTREMELY up front about it, which I've tried telling him to tone down. His response was to come to my apartment on my birthday stoned to the gills and try to dump a couple of grams on me as a present because "he had so much, his apartment was starting to smell like weed 'more than usual'".

:3:

Godholio
Aug 28, 2002

Does a bear split in the woods near Zheleznogorsk?
Ate a bunch of jalapenos (and amazing mini tacos pastor) so my stomach is trying to drive my intestine out through my rear end in a top hat with pitchforks and fire.


I'll probably go back next Tuesday.

Nostalgia4Dogges
Jun 18, 2004

Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

http://www.airforcetimes.com/story/military/2015/09/08/police-hate-group-assaults-air-force-officer/71895964/

Nice and hot piss
Feb 1, 2004

Flying through clouds is P.neat... Pretty much sums up my entire day at work.





Nice and hot piss fucked around with this message at 05:04 on Sep 9, 2015

Nostalgia4Dogges
Jun 18, 2004

Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

Zeris
Apr 15, 2003

Quality posting direct from my brain to your face holes.
Deathy is the best vet drinking buddy and v v handsome

You guys don't even know

Just say wow I'm jealous

Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009

Zeris posted:

Deathy is the best vet drinking buddy and v v handsome

You guys don't even know

Just say wow I'm jealous

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YaG5SAw1n0c

Eugene V. Dubstep
Oct 4, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!
nursing a glass of Bulleit and reflecting thta kirsten dunst has gotten insanely hot in her 30s



cant fuckin wait for fargo season 2

edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_emq_NzO7H8

Eugene V. Dubstep fucked around with this message at 06:31 on Sep 9, 2015

Delizin
Nov 9, 2005

It may not be interracial, but it is black and white.
God drat Matt Damon let himself go.

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro

Delizin posted:

God drat Matt Damon let himself go.

Nah, make up guy is just on point

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

c-spam cannot afford



Zeris posted:

Deathy is the best vet drinking buddy and v v handsome

You guys don't even know

Just say wow I'm jealous

I've drank with deathy before. he's a chill dude.

The Rat
Aug 29, 2004

You will find no one to help you here. Beth DuClare has been dissected and placed in cryonic storage.

I ran into Deathy on deployment once back in '06. Chill dude.

Slim Pickens
Jan 12, 2007

Grimey Drawer

at the date posted:

nursing a glass of Bulleit and reflecting thta kirsten dunst has gotten insanely hot in her 30s



cant fuckin wait for fargo season 2

edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_emq_NzO7H8

Matt Damon looks like he runs a logging company in Minnesota

I don't know anything about the Fargo TV series, so maybe that's exactly what he is in it

Eugene V. Dubstep
Oct 4, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!

Slim Pickens posted:

Matt Damon looks like he runs a logging company in Minnesota

I don't know anything about the Fargo TV series, so maybe that's exactly what he is in it

it's not Matt Damon, it's the guy from Breaking Bad

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Slim Pickens
Jan 12, 2007

Grimey Drawer
loving Todd, that piece of poo poo

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