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Helldump Immunity.
Aug 2, 2013

Fuck you

Fart Sandwiches posted:

I was a groomsman in a wedding earlier this year and I abused the open bar to have an open beer in every pocket. Both front pockets, one back pocket, my shirt pocket, and one in my hand. Wedding drunk is the best drunk.

got cut off from an open bar and I was the best man :(

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Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this

Helldump Immunity. posted:

got cut off from an open bar and I was the best man :(

A different wedding only had open bar for the first hour of reception. I missed 45 minutes of it because of wedding party pictures so I just went to the bar and got several hours of drinks in 15 minutes. They had these cool beers in plastic bottles and it was like old school squeezits. It helped with my crippling anxiety in social situations

beanieson
Sep 25, 2008

I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av
Dude had one move, electic slide, now he's a fuckin wallflowers

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
Wow posting in the drunk thread while drunk about irresponsible alcohol use really makes me sound like an alcoholic. I promise I'm not!

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

Fart Sandwiches posted:

Wow posting in the drunk thread while drunk about irresponsible alcohol use really makes me sound like an alcoholic. I promise I'm not!

:)

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
Suck my dick from the balls.


One of many solid posts from this thread.

Godholio
Aug 28, 2002

Does a bear split in the woods near Zheleznogorsk?

Rad Lieutenant posted:

Dude had one move, electic slide, now he's a fuckin wallflowers



Well it didn't work, the bride didn't ditch her new husband and run off with him.

bloops
Dec 31, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!

Rad Lieutenant posted:

I found this by the photo booth and brought it to him on the balcony



He didn't take it, and didn't respond at all :ohdear:

Very good.

beanieson
Sep 25, 2008

I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av
Red wine flowing, suspicions growin, dance moves........ showin?


Dude might be gay??? I didn't straight up ask, but I was like "wher s your daye?" And he's all "I'm seeing someone but it's weird & not arrious yet"


Guy is from south fuckinj Louisiana, he might be super closetd? Did I read this all wrong?

bloops
Dec 31, 2010

Thanks Ape Pussy!
that explains the windswept skull

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

c-spam cannot afford



If he's also from lousiana you just need to start coonassing with him and you'll learn everything about him.

Nostalgia4Infinity
Feb 27, 2007

10,000 YEARS WASN'T ENOUGH LURKING
Dudes playing the pronoun game.

beanieson
Sep 25, 2008

I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadn he's gone


gently caress this guy




My 4to is straight loving mackijg on a bridesmaid on th dance floor



gently caress money smoke bitches get weed drink Merlot at altitude everyday suck my dick from the balls



Mid he shows up with an AR I'll be missed

Kung Fu Fist Fuck
Aug 9, 2009
i bet homeboy is hella gay and he took all of beanies pestering as unwanted advances

Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
Beanie gonna get laid tonight

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

Fart Sandwiches posted:

Beanie gonna get laid tonight

Beanie has a four year old in the hotel room so gonna go with no.

Nostalgia4Infinity
Feb 27, 2007

10,000 YEARS WASN'T ENOUGH LURKING

EVA BRAUN BLOWJOBS posted:

Beanie has a four year old in the hotel room so gonna go with no.

He'll just think daddy's hurting mommy.

Nostalgia4Butts
Jun 1, 2006

WHERE MY HOSE DRINKERS AT

maybe he can swing a handy in the hotel bathroom

beanieson
Sep 25, 2008

I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av
Best man just straight up make it raine on the dance floor and I'm busy tryin to convivnd my kid to pick up the loving cash


I'm Loki, dude. Thos paper s BUY LEGOS


GET TO IT



He just wants to dance with the hot younger sisftrt bridesbade
Kids a ducking pmp


gently caress beta maid. Dudes been gone for literally hours. He's a lost cause, gay r not


Peace GiP

Nostalgia4Butts
Jun 1, 2006

WHERE MY HOSE DRINKERS AT

you're doing gods work man

you made this weekend on GiP special

Godholio
Aug 28, 2002

Does a bear split in the woods near Zheleznogorsk?
You're kid's cool.


See if he'll hook the man of honor up with a dance w/his bae

Godholio posted:

You're kid's cool.


See if he'll hook the man of honor up with a dance w/his bae

Then charge him :10bux:

Godholio fucked around with this message at 04:24 on Oct 18, 2015

Helldump Immunity.
Aug 2, 2013

Fuck you
beanie gonna give his wife another pearl necklace

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

bride should be getting smashed out right about now

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ne3XojNonEU

beanieson
Sep 25, 2008

I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av
Got me a bed and a wake up call and an early fuckin flight and I'm ssssooooo fuckin don with these mountains peace out you beautiful strangers you alre all special snowflakes I wish you the bwat

Mr. Nice!
Oct 13, 2005

c-spam cannot afford



Rad Lieutenant posted:

Got me a bed and a wake up call and an early fuckin flight and I'm ssssooooo fuckin don with these mountains peace out you beautiful strangers you alre all special snowflakes I wish you the bwat

Godspeed thanks for the entertainment!

Rough Lobster
May 27, 2009

Don't be such a squid, bro
You need to get man of honor laid, dude. You could seriously be averting a potential crisis. Find the fat bridesmais, get some alcohol into both of them, and let desperation and nature take its course. Be a hero

USMC503
Jan 15, 2012

For satisfactory performance while under the effects of hostile enemy alcohol.
I am mildly disappointed this didn't get more intense.

Click Beelay
Oct 13, 2011

Anyone up? Drinking and doing a 20% internet programming assignment due in ten hours, easy but tedious. Dunno if impromptu drunk skype sessions are a thing elsewhere but gently caress it, worth a shot ya'll are good cunts. I'll work my way through my top shelf if you do yours :eng99:

beanieson
Sep 25, 2008

I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av
Sorry there wasn't a meltdown guys, I was really hoping for some sort of murder/suicide/arson/hostage situation.

Booblord Zagats
Oct 30, 2011


Pork Pro

Rad Lieutenant posted:

Sorry there wasn't a meltdown guys, I was really hoping for some sort of murder/suicide/arson/hostage situation.

You did everything anyone could do, beanie. Not your fault the man of honor didn't have a breaking point. You did the Lord's work

Whip Slagcheek
Sep 21, 2008

Finally
The Gasoline And Dynamite
Will Light The Sky
For The Night


Rad Lieutenant posted:

No dj, there's a loving iPod with a preset playlist :argh:

I'm loving crushed

What the gently caress kind of wedding is this? Was it a cash bar too?

shyduck
Oct 3, 2003


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDlR_ccnZww

beanieson
Sep 25, 2008

I had the opportunity to change literally anything about the world and I used it to get a new av

Whip Slagcheek posted:

What the gently caress kind of wedding is this? Was it a cash bar too?

Booze was free & flowing. I think they just saved money where they could since the trip itself was so expensive.


Peepin butts at Denver international, p choice scenery by John Elway's restaurant.


E: i don't know when yoga pants became the go to wear for air travel but I'm all for it.

beanieson fucked around with this message at 18:19 on Oct 18, 2015

krispykremessuck
Jul 22, 2005

unlike most veterans and SA members $10 is not a meaningful expenditure for me

I'm gonna have me a swag Bar-B-Q
that dude looked like a slightly less deformed version of sloth

Nostalgia4Dogges
Jun 18, 2004

Only emojis can express my pure, simple stupidity.

Airport is like yoga pants /leggings sanctuary. Not always the ones you wanna see tho

Slim Pickens
Jan 12, 2007

Grimey Drawer

Rad Lieutenant posted:

I was really hoping for some sort of murder/suicide/arson/hostage situation.

New mouseover text?

That or "dude stuff happens from time to time"

Whip Slagcheek
Sep 21, 2008

Finally
The Gasoline And Dynamite
Will Light The Sky
For The Night


Rad Lieutenant posted:

Booze was free & flowing. I think they just saved money where they could since the trip itself was so expensive.


Peepin butts at Denver international, p choice scenery by John Elway's restaurant.


E: i don't know when yoga pants became the go to wear for air travel but I'm all for it.

They did a destination wedding to Colorado? Lol

Nostalgia4Infinity
Feb 27, 2007

10,000 YEARS WASN'T ENOUGH LURKING
"Press X to pay respects"

Branis
Apr 14, 2006

by VG

Whip Slagcheek posted:

They did a destination wedding to Colorado? Lol

Thats about as exotic as louisiana swamp folk can afford.

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Fart Sandwiches
Apr 4, 2006

i never asked for this
Just won a free tattoo at a shop here

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