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prefect posted:
No that would be an Artie "bit" Top 5 Artie Bits 1-High Pitch Mike at Disney 2-Artie 1 vs 1 with a female basketball player 3- Gary first pitch 4-Artie as Ed Torrian 5-Artie weight loss contest
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Oct 20, 2015 23:11
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Djarum posted:Eh. That is too uncomfortable of a setting for Howard. You can see how much he is hating every second of it on the episodes he is on. I could see either a traditional talk show in the vein of Carson, etc or a Larry King type of one on one style. Something that Howard can control the environment and conversation like on the radio show. I'm not saying it wouldn't be a success, but- 1) Do we really need another television format interview show? 2) If he goes that route, will he be relevant enough to convince non-Stern fans to watch? 3) If he has an interview focused show/podcast, will classic Stern fans care enough to watch/listen? It's easy for social networks and forums like SA, Reddit, and SFN to shape your perception of what fans think of the show, but I can't help but feel like classic stern fans don't want to listen to Howard suck up to celebrities like Ellen for an hour. Maybe I'm wrong. Corb3t fucked around with this message at 23:51 on Oct 20, 2015 |
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Oct 20, 2015 23:49
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Mr Lance Murdock posted:No that would be an Artie "bit" These are all great but the '500 GRAAAAND' bit has to be up there too; I haven't heard the female basketball player bit, unless it was part of that conversation where Stuttering John was convinced he could make an arena league roster?
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Oct 20, 2015 23:53
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misdirectomy posted:Rup what is the kind of porn whose popularity makes you lose faith in humanity the most? Aside from the downright illegal and horrible poo poo I've seen that made me take a long walk away from my computer? The overwhelming amount of solo male vids. Look, if you're hot, in shape, toned, muscle-y, whatever, jack off for the ladies and the gay men (or just so you can watch it later). That right there would account for about 5% of solo male stuff we get. The rest of it? Overweight, heavy-breathing, hairy, wet-with-cheesy-sweat, small-dicked weirdos who just feel the need to pretend that they're the hottest thing ever. There was this chubby asian guy who, week after week, would upload videos of him jacking off, but the whole time, he's got this angry 'gently caress YOU' grimace on his face, constantly murmuring poo poo like "you like my huge cock? Huh? You like that big thing inside you?! Yeah? YEAH?!? Mmmmmmmm, yeah, take it allllll, gently caress yeah'. Then there was the photo album account of some whiter-than-white ginger 'bear' (fat, hairy gay guy) who would just upload pics of his rear end in a top hat. Some were WAY too close up, but most had his face visible in the background, and he always had this crazy, super happy-go-lucky smile going on while he was spreading his buttcheeks. Seriously, hundreds of photos of ol' Smiley Red. And of course, the one we all laugh at at work is some middle aged, pudgy accountant-looking motherfucker who only uploads one type of video; him, completely naked, in his living room, 'dancing' to European (German? Austrian?) polka music, but in a way that makes his dick flop up and down, up and down, over and over. Usually for like 4 minutes at a time. I just don't get these people.
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Oct 21, 2015 00:19
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:Then there was the photo album account of some whiter-than-white ginger 'bear' (fat, hairy gay guy) who would just upload pics of his rear end in a top hat. Some were WAY too close up, but most had his face visible in the background, and he always had this crazy, super happy-go-lucky smile going on while he was spreading his buttcheeks. Seriously, hundreds of photos of ol' Smiley Red. That was me. I took them just because I knew you would see them
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Oct 21, 2015 00:36
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Wow, poo poo is against the rules? I'm grossed out by the thought of it, so I never download any, but my porn torrent site has TONS of scat videos. It's quite popular.
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Oct 21, 2015 00:53
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Squashy Nipples posted:Wow, poo poo is against the rules? Well, good luck finding that on the Pornhub network.
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Oct 21, 2015 00:54
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Another great Artie bit is the one where they're talking to the woman ex baseball player and is smashed drunk taunting her saying she'll never strike him out. And they agree to try it. I think you know how it goes down.
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Oct 21, 2015 01:10
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GobiasIndustries posted:These are all great but the '500 GRAAAAND' bit has to be up there too; I haven't heard the female basketball player bit, unless it was part of that conversation where Stuttering John was convinced he could make an arena league roster? Part of his typical Yankee Italian misogyny was suggesting how women pale in comparison to him in sports. To this end there were two trips to Vegas and on each there were games played against women. I believe the first was actually Artie claiming he could hit a baseball thrown from any woman on the planet, a fair assumption since I would say even back then there was probably 20 women on the earth who could throw a baseball overhand at anything over 50mph which is a joke speed for anyone who's ever played baseball beyond putting the bat on the tee. So they found a woman and he gets a hit off her in like 3 pitches(not a great hit but a hit). The following year they upped it to him being able to beat a woman in basketball. I think this was partially a bit on his part because he really never played basketball and it was just being done so they could add something else to the Vegas trip. They found a girl that was a backup(I believe) at Penn State. Artie jumped out to a huge like 10-2 lead and then managed to lose 15-14 in hilarious fashion since the game lasted more than 5 minutes and he was winded. I should point out that this was pre-Sirius Artie so it was fairly healthy Artie not morbidly obese Artie. They should be out there on Youtube if you look for them including the videos if you're lucky. The basketball one is a real treat although surprisingly little harassment followed on the show which lends credence to the notion of it being more of a bit than something he hardcore bought into like being able to get a hit off any woman. beep by grandpa posted:Another great Artie bit is the one where they're talking to the woman ex baseball player and is smashed drunk taunting her saying she'll never strike him out. And they agree to try it. I think you know how it goes down. Unless there was a 2nd instance of this he got a hit off the girl in Vegas. It was the basketball player that got him.
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Oct 21, 2015 01:19
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:Aside from the downright illegal and horrible poo poo I've seen that made me take a long walk away from my computer? Also is there way more Stepdad/stepdaughter porn these days or am I just getting better at finding it?
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Oct 21, 2015 01:26
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Your Gay Uncle posted:Couldn't they just hire a gay person to sort those vids? People are running out of taboos. I was listening to Jason Ellis and he had his porn friend on taking about the sudden demand for it.
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Oct 21, 2015 01:29
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Your Gay Uncle posted:Couldn't they just hire a gay person to sort those vids? There is a HUGE amount of close-to-incest porn, it's insane. It feels like every category is booming, really, so it's not just that one. Also, we do have gay guys on our team, but let me tell you... There have been some thoroughly gross women, as well, so we're all seeing poo poo we don't want to see. "Crackwhore Confessions" is just the worst.
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Oct 21, 2015 01:35
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The Human Crouton posted:People are running out of taboos. I was listening to Jason Ellis and he had his porn friend on taking about the sudden demand for it. The incest thing is crazy-popular where I download my porn. Not my thing, but apparently everybody else is nuts about it. 
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Oct 21, 2015 01:41
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Just fyi, if anyone here wants less-gross porn, Youporn is the place. For managerial reasons that I can't get into, the rules are more strict for that site.
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Oct 21, 2015 01:45
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Maybe the destruction of the nuclear family is an evolutionary reaction to make sure that we don't gently caress our own genetic daughters, and capitalist pornographers are just the first metric we have available to notice it.
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Oct 21, 2015 01:46
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:Just fyi, if anyone here wants less-gross porn, Youporn is the place. For managerial reasons that I can't get into, the rules are more strict for that site. Which is the one that Dan the Farter makes videos for?
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Oct 21, 2015 01:46
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prefect posted:Which is the one that Dan the Farter makes videos for? Probably Pornhub, but I don't know.
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Oct 21, 2015 01:47
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Mr Lance Murdock posted:No that would be an Artie "bit" I love Artie's imitations  But I have to admit, an astute caller once noted, 'How talented is Artie really as an impressionist if both impressions he can pull off sounds like a grizzled redneck or a fresh-off-the-boat Paki' lolMy favs: 1 - Artie as Notorious BIG 2 - Artie as Guy Who Laughs At Everything 3 - Artie as Chaz Bono 4 - Artie as King Of All Blacks 5 - Artie as Jeff the Drunk / Blue Iris
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Oct 21, 2015 01:56
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Crotch Bat posted:Part of his typical Yankee Italian misogyny was suggesting how women pale in comparison to him in sports. To this end there were two trips to Vegas and on each there were games played against women. Yeah you pretty much have the timeline down. Robin reads a news story about the first professional female baseball player. She pitched for a minor league team. Artie says he can get a hit off any "broad" pitching overhand. Fast forward to the next vegas show. Video Below https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zvwo2w3LCSI The Basketball challenge is pretty much the same thing, except Artie is drunk off his rear end https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GE2fuliuJGk
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Oct 21, 2015 01:57
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Cliche Guevara posted:2 - Artie as Guy Who Laughs At Everything This just reminded me of Artie as Henry Hill (the guy from Goodfellas). 
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Oct 21, 2015 02:00
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Is "Guy who laughs at everything" the same guy who breaks down why 'Look Who's Talking' is funny?
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Oct 21, 2015 02:02
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:There is a HUGE amount of close-to-incest porn, it's insane. It feels like every category is booming, really, so it's not just that one. why did I even check http://youtu.be/YUKmq7UMJys
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Oct 21, 2015 02:17
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Your Gay Uncle posted:why did I even check You're lucky; you had the OPTION. It's my actual job.
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Oct 21, 2015 02:26
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:You're lucky; you had the OPTION. What the hell do you put on your resume when it's time to move on?
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Oct 21, 2015 02:30
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The Human Crouton posted:What the hell do you put on your resume when it's time to move on? Content management for an extremely high-traffic website network.
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Oct 21, 2015 02:32
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:Is "Guy who laughs at everything" the same guy who breaks down why 'Look Who's Talking' is funny? Yes. I think that was the origin of the bit. I'm getting LASIK next month, and you can't use the computer for a 1-2 days afterwards, so I'm planning on sitting in a darkening room and queuing up a lot of Stern on Sonos. Any suggestions for Artie packs?
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Oct 21, 2015 02:52
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Squashy Nipples posted:Yes. I think that was the origin of the bit. See that Shaggy DA, do yourself a loving favor. Orchestrated Mess fucked around with this message at 03:01 on Oct 21, 2015 |
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Oct 21, 2015 02:59
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Bag of Sun Chips posted:I'm not saying it wouldn't be a success, but- People like "us" aren't the demographic that they would be wanting. Look at how popular Ellen and before her Rosie shows are. Super safe, non offensive interview shows where you get all the big stars and throw them softball questions are big business. You would be insane to think that Netflix or Amazon wouldn't like a daily program like it. The Larry King type of program would be more interesting. But you wouldn't be able to get the same clientele. Also with how Howard has been positioned I don't see them going that route either. Honestly it is pretty evident that Howard doesn't give a poo poo about the radio show fans anymore. He is now positioned for the average Middle America housewife. I don't know anyone who isn't in the demographic who watched AGT nor does Howard's old audience watch AGT. With the transition in the radio show they have abandoned the old audience and feel they have enough of a new audience to move to a different world. Howard is on Jimmy Kimmel sometime this week according to a commercial tonight. I would imagine a announcement could come there.
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Oct 21, 2015 04:22
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Mr Lance Murdock posted:No that would be an Artie "bit" Him dying at the Mike Walker fart was classic. I just watched it like a billion times last week.
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Oct 21, 2015 07:34
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There's no possible chance anything he does after radio lasts more than a year or so before he "retires" from it. No network is giving him a show because their demographic has absolutely no idea he's not the stripper-loving fart master from 20 years ago any longer so his best shot is going to be on some 3rd rate cable channel and nobody's going to tune in to watch an ancient DJ interview B list celebs. His fans will flock to watch for like a week or two before they get bored, realize there's nobody around for Howard to bounce things off of and tune back out. He tried this once before and it failed for essentially the same reasons and that was when he was ultra-popular in the late 90s. He doesn't have the ability to carry a show by himself, he's at his best with others around him. e:  here's the wonderful Beth O. hushing her maid while making a video of cats. Turn the volume up to hear the maid apologize.https://instagram.com/p/81M6bbIfOM/ Crotch Bat fucked around with this message at 07:57 on Oct 21, 2015 |
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Oct 21, 2015 07:54
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Zoben posted:Him dying at the Mike Walker fart was classic. I just watched it like a billion times last week. That is a great one. Also coming out to George, Artie vs Sal and Richard. Oh and how can we forget Artie and Gilbert "Nigga what"
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Oct 21, 2015 14:02
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this is more sad than anything
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Oct 21, 2015 14:48
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Rupert Buttermilk posted:It is not. poo poo is enough to get the video taken down. Hi, I have a guess on the scrabble word. Is it 'bukakke?'
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Oct 21, 2015 15:37
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Crotch Bat posted:There's no possible chance anything he does after radio lasts more than a year or so before he "retires" from it. No network is giving him a show because their demographic has absolutely no idea he's not the stripper-loving fart master from 20 years ago any longer so his best shot is going to be on some 3rd rate cable channel and nobody's going to tune in to watch an ancient DJ interview B list celebs. His fans will flock to watch for like a week or two before they get bored, realize there's nobody around for Howard to bounce things off of and tune back out. The demographic they want either has no idea what Howard used to be or has seen him on AGT for the last several years. Again you have to realize something like this is not designed for us. Have you ever tried to watch a episode of Ellen? It is absolute fluff garbage but people, especially women, eat it up. As a plus he can still keep a 3 day work week as they pretape at least 1 episode a week so moving it to 2 wouldn't be a stretch especially for something that isn't super topical in humor like a show as this. It is a step up in work from doing a game show but still much less work than doing the radio show every day.
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Oct 21, 2015 16:28
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Djarum posted:The demographic they want either has no idea what Howard used to be or has seen him on AGT for the last several years. Again you have to realize something like this is not designed for us. Have you ever tried to watch a episode of Ellen? It is absolute fluff garbage but people, especially women, eat it up. As a plus he can still keep a 3 day work week as they pretape at least 1 episode a week so moving it to 2 wouldn't be a stretch especially for something that isn't super topical in humor like a show as this. I'm just not convinced Howard's interview qualities would translate well to a 30/60 minute network tv show. It's hard to compare him to Ellen, because Ellen is light hearted and goofy, it's no wonder she's popular. Middle America eats up celebrities dancing and acting goofy. Howard's strength is his long form interviews, and we all know where people go for that type of content - podcasts. What do I know, maybe he'll be successful on Hulu or Netflix or something. I just don't think the current version of Stern would be very popular. Maybe he'll surprise us with a new show that's completely different.
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Oct 21, 2015 16:40
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Djarum posted:The demographic they want either has no idea what Howard used to be or has seen him on AGT for the last several years. Again you have to realize something like this is not designed for us. Have you ever tried to watch a episode of Ellen? It is absolute fluff garbage but people, especially women, eat it up. As a plus he can still keep a 3 day work week as they pretape at least 1 episode a week so moving it to 2 wouldn't be a stretch especially for something that isn't super topical in humor like a show as this. Does he think that people won't stumble upon his 30 years history of strippers, lesbians, retards and midgets? You can watch the old Dean Martin roasts and chalk the racism and sexism to the times, but I have a hard time believing that middle America would do that. Throwing lunch meat at the rear end of a stripper isn't something that people causally did in the 90s. Has it ever come out how much Marci Turk is being paid? Whatever Howard's next move is, I'm sure she'll come out on top financially when it eventually fails. This just sounds like another person or group that knows how to get Howard to open his wallet. Like his shrink that wants him to have sessions 4 times a week and the guy that charges $300 to install a DVD player.
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Oct 21, 2015 16:50
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Who gives a gently caress This thread is a nostalgia thread for a reason. Dude is 60 some years old and he pushed away everyone that made his show interesting. The show died with Eric the acting midget and you know it.
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Oct 21, 2015 17:14
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CortezFantastic posted:Who gives a gently caress FTFY
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Oct 21, 2015 17:35
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Bonzo posted:Does he think that people won't stumble upon his 30 years history of strippers, lesbians, retards and midgets? Dont forget he paid like 20 GRAAAAAND to get a TV mounted.
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Oct 21, 2015 17:36
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Mr Lance Murdock posted:No that would be an Artie "bit" These are my top 5 Artie bits to listen to in the car. I'm not saying they're the best, but when listening to Artie bits in the car, they are my top 5
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Oct 21, 2015 17:58
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