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Around two years ago in the Dominican Republic I got two large liquor bottles full of the freshest, tastiest honey for only 40 pesos a pop. 40 pesos was less than a dollar, and I enjoyed the gently caress out of that honey and I haven't ever tasted honey that tasted that good since. Goofy white people are the worst.
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Apr 10, 2016 05:58
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Scathach posted:"Artisan" honey. Guess what? All honey is made with the hands of tiny bees. Either it's all artisan or none of it is. Laurelhurst IS the yuppie neighborhood so this isn't remotely surprising.
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Apr 10, 2016 06:06
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Scathach posted:Yeah that much money for such a small amount of honey is just not cool. I can get a much larger jar of honey just as good (and with local flowers too!) without the stupid misleading hipster label from a farm down the street for $5-10. B-but they wrote on the jar with a pen. It has to be the best.
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Apr 10, 2016 08:29
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cash crab posted:So, when I take a bath, I am activated, yes? Neat Artisanal activated raccoon
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Apr 10, 2016 12:41
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Scathach posted:Welp time to put radium pills up our butts. Might as well with the rest of this woo woo bullshit. The gently caress is activated lemonade?
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Apr 10, 2016 12:59
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quote:Activated charcoal is charcoal made from coconut, peat, coal or wood that’s been heated with a gas that creates internal pores, making it very absorbent. It’s traditionally administered in emergency rooms to treat poisoning or drug overdoses. A new generation of snake oil edit: I wonder how long it'll take until someone actually dies due to their lemonade absorbing a medicine their body needs. Ironically the medicinal carbon also absorbs the vitamins contained in the juice among other things. Trogdos! fucked around with this message at 13:48 on Apr 10, 2016 |
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Apr 10, 2016 13:37
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Schubalts posted:The gently caress is activated lemonade?  Wet lemonade.
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Apr 10, 2016 17:23
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Internet Kraken posted:Now? If you live in the modern world its easy to find out that a bunch of these miracle cures are bullshit. Its funny when you just laugh at people buying into the latest crazy diet fad but not so much when it comes to stuff like Chinese folk medicine, where rich assholes drive species extinct for their magic healing powers. Fun fact, the Chinese communist party actually promoted traditional Chinese medicine in the mid 20th century because they knew they wouldn't be able to provide real medicine to the entire population. Internet Kraken posted:The only way this stuff will stop is when a product actually does what they claim to do. Otherwise people are always going to buy these miracle products, forever chasing the dream of an impossible cure or low effort diet. Except that a ton of them are used for treating completely imaginary problems (toxins etc.) The Moon Monster fucked around with this message at 19:09 on Apr 10, 2016 |
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Apr 10, 2016 19:04
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Trogdos! posted:
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Apr 10, 2016 21:47
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Trogdos! posted:A new generation of snake oil Ever read Good Omens? In the book, one of the Four Horsemen Famine, was a CEO of a corporation that makes food with negative nutritional value so people eat as much as they want and starve to death. I'm beginning to think he's real.
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Apr 11, 2016 00:49
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Apr 11, 2016 01:13
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Hey what do you have against delicious pickles? I mean unless those are more than $5 a jar.
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Apr 11, 2016 01:16
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Scathach posted:Hey what do you have against delicious pickles? I mean unless those are more than $5 a jar. Don't you see they are being activated?
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Apr 11, 2016 01:23
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Scathach posted:Hey what do you have against delicious pickles? I mean unless those are more than $5 a jar. Those are $17 a jar.
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Apr 11, 2016 02:11
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Oh boy I love paying extra to have random poo poo shoved in the jar with my pickles.
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Apr 11, 2016 03:08
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I don't understand why they can't just make their own instead of buying super-expensive pickled things. It's easy and cheap. Artisan Oreos-- just as unhealthy as the regular ones, except they probably cost 4x as much. Scathach fucked around with this message at 04:53 on Apr 11, 2016 |
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Apr 11, 2016 03:40
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It's amazing how current this still is:
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Apr 11, 2016 04:31
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Internet Kraken posted:Oh boy I love paying extra to have random poo poo shoved in the jar with my pickles. That poo poo is wearing gloves so its probably not staying in the jar, thankfully.
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Apr 11, 2016 06:20
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9gGL1cnnhg
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Apr 11, 2016 09:13
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Marenghi posted:Google artisan honey and read up on some stupid poo poo. Apparently artisan honey comes in varietal and mono-floral products, depending on whether the bees harvested from a single or blend of flowers. Now I'm no bee expert but they're not exactly controllable are they. How do these people know what flowers in the region they are selecting to collect pollen from. Outside of keeping a bee-hive in a green house with only selected plants can you really say exactly what flowers were used in the honey making process. I won't defend asking some crazy money for a jar of magical honey but a smaller local honey manufacturer will absolutely offer a flavor that big companies can't achieve because they mix honey from different sources to have a consistent never-changing taste. I really hope this thread doesn't devolve into 'why buy actually good quality local meat/cheese/honey when you can just go to Walmart' because that's just stupid.
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Apr 11, 2016 11:21
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Internet Kraken posted:Oh boy I love paying extra to have random poo poo shoved in the jar with my pickles. More material for the gallery of "artisanal" crap co-opted by big corporations.  Available at your local Walmart for definitely less than $17 a jar.
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Apr 11, 2016 12:13
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Palpek posted:Uhhh, yes, yes they can, controlling what bees make honey from is like one of the staples of the honey industry. What you're doing here is being ignorant about actual knowledge behind a trade. Agreed, but can we still point and laugh at folk who buy Manuka honey? Global consumption: 10000 tons p/a. Amount of manuka honey made in New Zealand: 1700 tons p/a There's something about honey that strikes some people as innately magical, and not in the "Wow, this stuff was literally siphoned out of flowers by insects, millilitre by millilitre, and took 55,000 flight miles per jar" way. Decades after it was discovered that honey is unsafe for babies because it can contain botulism spores, you can still find stuff like this (shame on you, Guardian, this is still in your Science section, a decade after I and a lot of other people pointed out that it was at least mildly demented): https://www.theguardian.com/science/2005/aug/25/health.society Carnival of Shrews fucked around with this message at 12:46 on Apr 11, 2016 |
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Apr 11, 2016 12:43
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Scathach posted:Artisan Oreos-- just as unhealthy as the regular ones, except they probably cost 4x as much.  
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Apr 11, 2016 12:54
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How. How can you gently caress making a moulded chocolate.
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Apr 11, 2016 13:24
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Palpek posted:Recreating junk food using 'artisanal' methods is definitely hilarious to me: Is that meat in there?
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Apr 11, 2016 14:06
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Palpek posted:Recreating junk food using 'artisanal' methods is definitely hilarious to me: Did some motherfucker put kale in there?
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Apr 11, 2016 15:02
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cheerfullydrab posted:More material for the gallery of "artisanal" crap co-opted by big corporations. Finally, a place for farmers to grow vegetables.
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Apr 11, 2016 15:43
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Palpek posted:Recreating junk food using 'artisanal' methods is definitely hilarious to me: This is horrifying looking.
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Apr 11, 2016 17:22
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Carnival of Shrews posted:Agreed, but can we still point and laugh at folk who buy Manuka honey? I make soap with manuka honey (manuka is the tea tree). It doesn't taste that great - definitely a bitter flavor. I go to my local farmer's market for eating honey.
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Apr 11, 2016 17:59
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Gridlocked posted:Is that meat in there?  But wait, there's more, always read the title at the bottom first:         
Palpek fucked around with this message at 19:01 on Apr 11, 2016 |
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Apr 11, 2016 18:55
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I'm the ill dip.
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Apr 11, 2016 18:58
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*specifically states that the hand-made fritos were made from non-gmo corn* *uses foie gras in a loving artisanal chipwich*
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Apr 11, 2016 18:59
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I want no part in the future those abominations came from. The thing that bugs me the most is the resses cup. Cause it almost looks like a nice desert, then they gently caress it all up throwing bacon on. Why do these guys think everything needs meat in it???
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Apr 11, 2016 19:03
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It's a nice touch that Flamin' Hot Cheetos are literally slices of fat mixed with pig ears which were my dog's favorite snack.
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Apr 11, 2016 19:09
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I'm the shaved lardo.
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Apr 11, 2016 19:12
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im new to the thread so it may have been talkeda bout but i really hate putting duck fat or truffle oil on everything like its some kind of cure all for lame food seriously i dont need truffle oil on my peanut butter sandwich and i think it was a bit unnecessary to fry that okra in duck fat
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Apr 11, 2016 19:15
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tomstuart posted:im new to the thread so it may have been talkeda bout but i really hate putting duck fat or truffle oil on everything like its some kind of cure all for lame food
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Apr 11, 2016 19:25
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Internet Kraken posted:I want no part in the future those abominations came from. Thank you. It never ceases to amaze me how certain chefs feel they can't make something without adding meat. Every single thing has meat added to it, even things like the twinkie and chipwich. Desserts do not need meat.
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Apr 11, 2016 19:34
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But how can you assert your nouveau-masculinity without adding meat? Kale and sugar are icky and feminine and non-paleo, gotta have that bacon from pigs that have been listening to ASMR 30 minutes every day.
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Apr 11, 2016 19:46
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I'm the pear puree that looks like exhausted poop.
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Apr 11, 2016 19:52
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