darkarchon posted:hi nation, remember you adopted me at some point? yea of course
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Apr 13, 2016 21:17
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Beet Wagon posted:So you've not played Mafia then? 
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Apr 13, 2016 21:17
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I've sniped three pages today 
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Apr 13, 2016 21:18
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Nation posted:yea of course So what happened, I feel so alone, like hollow and death all the time.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:18
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Tijuana Bibliophile posted:I've sniped three pages today When I was challenging Marlin Perkins & posting African safari pictures I couldn't get a snipe to save my life. At work? Barely keeping up? Random shitpost? TO THE TOP OF THE NEW PAGE WITH YOU!
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Apr 13, 2016 21:19
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Maybe MoMA is Seraph.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:19
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Beet Wagon posted:So you've not played Mafia then? I have as a matter of fact. It was a joke. A bad one mind you. Its been a weird couple of days. Carry on.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:19
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Jon Do posted:i want to urinate on that sofa
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Apr 13, 2016 21:19
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Brazilianpeanutwar posted:The gently caress is CiG? You mean CIG? Come on maaaan. No you see contracts aren't binding if the company signs it with an all-cap version of its name It's a
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Apr 13, 2016 21:19
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darkarchon posted:So what happened, I feel so alone, like hollow and death all the time. i feel that too 
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Apr 13, 2016 21:20
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Holy poo poo, MoMA AND B_of_InfoRedux are posting at the same time. Can life get any sweeter?
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Apr 13, 2016 21:21
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beep_boop posted:Holy poo poo, MoMA AND B_of_InfoRedux are posting at the same time. Can life get any sweeter? It can actually. But not by much.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:22
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beep_boop posted:Holy poo poo, MoMA AND B_of_InfoRedux are posting at the same time. Can life get any sweeter? Yeah, if Derek makes it back from lunch.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:22
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B_of_InfoRedux posted:I have as a matter of fact. It was a joke. A bad one mind you. Its been a weird couple of days. Oh. Well then disregard the snark, this whole thread is just jacked to the tits right now.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:22
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Colostomy Bag posted:Yeah, if Derek makes it back from lunch. who knows what minor traffic citations he'll receive today!?
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Apr 13, 2016 21:23
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quote:And that is really why I have a dog in this race and have chosen a side. (No, no money.) ManofManyAliases posted:Let me step back, take off the troll hat and be completely, 100% honest for just a minute: Also, truthfully, I pretty much have made this clear in some private Discord chats, but I blame almost all of this on Sandi. Chris strikes me as mostly a well meaning schlub who has a really hard time saying no to people (as they would probably stop liking him if he did). I figure Sandi saw some buzz about Chris, had a brainstorm) and dug him out of her phone's contact list. In Chris she saw a chance to revive her flagging personal credibility (we have yet to see any real confirmation of her being the best marketer since she was a little girl) by being attached to THE BIGGEST CROWDFUNDING PROJECT EVA!!!111! By this point in time, it had been established that crowdfunding projects do often fail, usually with mostly minimal legal entanglements. So then, Sandi, Kingmaker (since she was a little princess), had her plan. (And, yes, at this point if this sounds like a heist movie, I am meaning it to). She reconnected with Chris, locked down their relationship with children, and starting stroking his ego to build him up to act with such audacity. This was her ticket to the big time. Parties, news article, a fuller IMDB page and all. She could be a STAH again! Then the KS launched. Money started rolling in, but a few people started having questions. BAM! Second big idea - OPEN DEVELOPMENT! There's no secrets here! We'll let you see EVERYTHING during our tours, even if said tours are reminiscent of the fake grocery store windows in North Korea. The development was just open enough to let you see what they wanted you to see. A wacky band of gender and race inclusive misfits, led by a BRILLYUNT! game developer from ages past (because all those drat geeks are awfully nostalgic for people that are supposedly futurists) and the most competent businesswoman since the invention of capitalism (albeit with no real verifiable CV as such - But, then again, DREAMS! don't need CVs), in a funfilled, luxurious workspace, no, hackerspace. And we'll add a splash of creativity and "sticking it to the man" by declaring "NO MASTERS! NO PUBLISHERS!" and going indy. That way they can suck in the malcontents and rebels in the geek crowd, too and steal some...valor?...no...glory from the burgeoning indy development scene. She's determined to ride this train as long as possible to leach as much money and star power out of it as she can and drat the consequences, as I see it. We've seen some signs of her sociopathy and need for constant ego reinforcement on multiple occasions. The problem is is that the seams on this ship weren't sealed with proper oakum, but with whatever was lying around and the captain refuses to look at the charts, declaiming instead that he knows the oceans better than anyone else. Even the most loyal sailors are starting to see the leaks overflowing the bilge and are torn between their rum rations and their oaths to the captain and their survival. Sorry for the recent wall of text effort OpEds. Blame people like AP, G0rf, darkarchon and the Ace Collective for shaming me into it.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:23
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Beet Wagon posted:Oh. Well then disregard the snark, this whole thread is just jacked to the tits right now. Stimpire slider is at four
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Apr 13, 2016 21:23
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Beet Wagon posted:Oh. Well then disregard the snark, this whole thread is just jacked to the tits right now. Disregarded. Can't say the stupid poo poo i have and still give a gently caress.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:24
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Colostomy Bag posted:Yeah, if Derek makes it back from lunch. Its cool, I have enough parpcorn to last all day.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:25
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Colostomy Bag posted:Yeah, if Derek makes it back from lunch. Derek seems like the type to have two hour lunches at a trendy restaurant while sipping a couple glasses of wine.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:26
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This is too convenient. Right when the thread was headed firmly for the shitter. We were in a hard swoon after Derek's blog was, let's say, unsubstantiated. Now our favorite posters return. 
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Apr 13, 2016 21:26
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ideate posted:who knows what minor traffic citations he'll receive today!? Pffft. He gives tickets to officers and traffic cameras.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:27
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Polish Avenger posted:This is too convenient. Right when the thread was headed firmly for the shitter. We were in a hard swoon after Derek's blog was, let's say, unsubstantiated. Now our favorite posters return. I just *KNOW* this thread will make it to  eventually. I believe!
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Apr 13, 2016 21:27
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Polish Avenger posted:This is too convenient. Right when the thread was headed firmly for the shitter. We were in a hard swoon after Derek's blog was, let's say, unsubstantiated. Now our favorite posters return. The update was enough to bring them out. It wasn't the blog update we needed, but it was the blog update we deserved.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:28
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All we still need is a G0RF effort post
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Apr 13, 2016 21:28
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 The 4th stimpire is defeated, On July 14th, if this thread gets that far, I propose we all get de-skeletonized. Or, just pretend we did.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:30
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Guys, my new serious Effort Post is going to take me longer than I thought. Here is one slightly less so-- or Part 1 of it, anyway. -----------------  TO: Chris Roberts FROM: Something Awful SUBJECT: Not that you needed anything else to worry about but OH CRAP WHAT IS THAT?! I know, despite outward appearances, these are the times that try men’s souls at Cloud Imperium Games. The enemies gather, seen and unseen— each seeking in some way to thwart the Great Work underway, each seeking to derail the longstanding plans to build The Best Furnished Space Sim Headquarters Ever. (Oh and there’s that space game you’re working on, too.) Snooping auditors, disloyal employees, space cat trolls, frenemy competitors, and of course, the Old School Internet Warlord himself. He’s always making new mischief when he should be trying to get the drat cyan out of his puny little space game! (Bloody Floridians, right? So tacky…) Yet— even as these enemies gather— Goon Scouts have just returned from the front lines of Battlefield PewPew with horrifying intelligence reports— of a threat looming just beyond the horizon-line. It lumbers slowly towards us all, obscured in a cloud of shadows, yet if the rumors we’ve heard are true, it poses a grave threat to all who promise to deliver immersive, agency-rich Space Game experiences, even those without tasteful, rustic furnishings that really do add an touch of old world class to space-ship themed lobbies with wrap-around murals. In fact, the threat is so gobsmackingly giant that even the Gaming Press picked up on it. They, too, see grave possibilities ahead for Star Citizen... quote:Zenimax Online Studios Troubling thoughts indeed, and it would be tempting, too tempting Sir, to assume Bethesda is simply seeking to ride on the coattails of the Gaming Studio that is without a doubt the Industry Leader in justifying lavish expenditures for its headquarter offices AND princely sums for pre-ordered DLC content while also working to develop a Space Game sometimes. But yet again, Goon Scouts have uncovered surprising details about the true history of this potentially industry-shaking development, for it has been decades in the making. It would appear that some competitors apparently subscribe to a radically different game development philosophy, one in which games are quietly created in secret in less extravagantly furnished offices...  BETHESDA: Laugh at his functional drone-worker furniture if you want, the threat he represents is real. Though their offices are reportedly sorely lacking in the artisanal decorative touches that separate the Best Furnished Game Developers from the Rest, Bethesda should not be underestimated... In contrast to your much remarked upon "let's make this up as we go along and tell everybody about it in the process" game design philosophy, Bethesda's legendary secrecy may actually represent a genuine competitive threat. Given their trademark sophistication, and in consideration of intel uncovered by Goon Spies, it is clear that "Starfield" was a project already in development by the time of their March 2013 filing. We advise you to ignore any claims that their consecration of the Starfield project was reactive to Star Citizen's well-publicized kickoff 6 months prior– they are false. Remember, too, that this is a studio that rebooted a moribund IP in a largely forgotten genre to great success only 4 years prior to that registration-- and reaped enormous critical praise and fantastic commercial success. As with Rockstar's surprising pivot to the all-but-dead Western genre, our spies report that Bethesda was planning a space game long ahead of the rebirth of the genre. First, we direct your attention to these provocative recent comments by Todd Howard. Our sources tell us that Starfield is one of these projects. Yet WHAT IS "STARFIELD"? Though few in the industry have a clue, Goontelligence reports indicate that Starfield is, in fact, going to be Bethesda's 3rd attempt at a Space RPG-- and that this time, unlike their little-known prior attempts, they are unlikely to fail. The following Usenet post marked FOR YOUR EYES ONLY was made by Todd Howard not long after Daggerfall(!) came out, only a couple of years into his tenure at Bethesda Games. There are a couple of interesting things to note here.  Unfortunately, it gets worse. Far worse... If you are not already sitting down, Chris, we advise you to find your way to the nearest Aviator Chair and gently nestle yourself into it's vintage, leather bomber jacket-like cushions. Allow the aerodynamic curves of the aluminum accented chair to embrace you. Find your strength and flyboy swagger, Chris. We fear you are going to need every last ounce by the time you finish reading this report. First and foremost, Todd Howard, who now has enough money to sumptuously decorate every single Bethesda Studio office should he choose to, was actually thinking about Space RPGs as far back as two decades ago-- as were many at Bethesda. In fact, at the time of young Howard's post, Bethesda had been partnering with Centropolis to develop an ambitious (at the time) space game called "The 10th Planet". Here is the trailer for that abandoned game.  If you are unable to watch this clip right now, gaze for a troubled moment, as we did, at the familiar touchstones...   Chillingly familiar, is it not? As one Goon remarked in sober horror, "I felt like I was watching a Squadron 42 trailer from 1996. Only with better animated reptiles." ---- Indeed, The 10th Planet -- with Draconian alien adversaries, Star Marine corridors, reptilian mother ships, spaceship pew-pew, gratuitous explosions, star maps and more -- seems to have been the Squadron 42 of its time. As relayed by our agent, "My god, Bethesda even had moon-breaking technology planned as far back as 1996, too!" Here is how that game trailer is described on Vimeo by an artist involved in its creation: Chris Romero posted:"Some of my most beloved work, game cutscene footage from "THE 10TH PLANET" a Bethesda Softworks / Centropolis Production. You certainly must be wondering by this point, as we were, what happened to The 10th Planet? What happened to Bethesda's first planned entry into the Space Game genre? We direct your attention to a quote from yet another former Bethesda developer: Tony, a former Bethesda Developer posted:"Chris, yeah I remember sitting in the Bethesda theatre and seeing what you produced. It looked great if we were going to produce a new TV show but unfortunately it probably killed the product. How on earth were we 'the game artists' supposed to recreate the world you were selling. Too much time and money was wasted on this trailer. Probably looks good on your Computer though." Knowing you as we do, the words above surely read like those of an absolute madman. The project was shelved because Bethesda's XnGine wasn't able to deliver upon the expectations created by the trailer-- and Bethesda lamented the time and money wasted on a cinematic trailer the game could never live up to! Sheer insanity. Yet Bethesda reportedly took another shot at "The 10th Planet" a couple of years later. It also failed, and apparently for similarly lunatic reasons. They couldn't deliver on the promise of their trailers. quote:“There was a second version of 10th Planet which was in development some time a bit later than this one – maybe 1997 or 1998 – at Simis (UK developer who went on to be Kuju.) Bethesda still wanted to release a version of the game. As far as I remember, this was ALSO cancelled because we were asked to do the game on quite short notice & so worked on gameplay over special effects. (There was probably some pressure to have a really good looking game after the first one didn’t work out.) Not sure the game was ever re-announced with this developer. [Simis worked on some similar games around that time such as Xenocracy so had an engine ready.]” It is difficult-- indeed, drat near impossible -- to imagine what kind of freakish, twisted logic might bring a gaming company to actually kill a project in development simply because they didn't feel the game could live up to a trailer. It seems almost the polar opposite of your own strategy which has brought with it such resplendent appointments. Yet they have succeeded in spite of this strange failure of will– in fact, they are now reaping fantastic fortunes as a result of this highly counter-intuitive strategy and in spite of their fondness for furnishing better suited for peasants and Frontier developers... At the risk of discomfiting you, however, we fear we must draw attention to the stark contrast. Not the stark contrast on display when comparing the exalted $1045 Flatiron Desks of Cloud Imperium with the lowly $100 function-ware of Bethesda's offices-- for here, you will triumph every time...  Instead, we must draw attention to the contrast between your Game Development process-- for here, too, the contrast couldn't be clearer, and yet here, we fear you may be on the losing side in the scales of the market. Star Citizen-- as it exists today-- remains an unstable tech demo still in a pre-Alpha state 4 years into development. Yet the game that is playable today or will be playable next year is not the game you have been selling since 2012, often with the aid of highly aspirational commercials. Cloud Imperium has achieved its unprecedented financial success by selling "THE GAME THAT WILL ONE DAY BE", and they have done that primarily through 'in engine' trailers for a game that doesn't exist and that you are unlikely to be able to deliver, even with another $100M and 4 more years. Bethesda, by contrast, generated $750 million dollars in one day with their latest release. And though Todd Howard has high regard for your past work, particularly your interface design on Times of Lore, and though he considers Origin his favorite classic-era development studio-- we fear we must press the urgency of this matter. The student has become the master, and that master, like you, has set his eyes on the stars. Though he surely sits in an unremarkable chair mass-produced in a factory, one that does not feature intentional nicks, small scratches and other imperfections that add to the character and uniqueness of said chair, his competitive advantages are real. They are the secrecy fostered between employees who trust each other and their employer, a war chest that dwarfs even what remains of your own, and a 20 year desire to branch out into the Space Game genre. If they were creating the equivalent of Squadron 42 in 1996-- it horrifies us to imagine what they might be up to now. Nevertheless, we have guesses. You will surely want to read them. We have familiarized you already with the competitive threats on the horizon. In our next installment of this report, we will appraise you in disquieting detail of the behemoth cloaked in shadows that soldiers towards you just beyond it. For the earth quakes beneath its feet, though you can not yet feel the tremors, and when it arrives, it threatens to steal glory, customers, and disposable income from millions. In the interim, we would advise you to consider investing in one of Restoration Hardware's Grand Leather Beanbags ($1150), perhaps with the companion Exotic Faux Fur blankie ($309). Neither is particularly dignified, but the beanbag is generously sized and perfectly plumped with sink-in comfort and portable repose and the blankie re-creates the subtly variegated tones and tipped ends characteristic of natural pelts. We believe after reading our disturbing follow-up report on Starfield, you will appreciate the cocooning comfort the combination will provide you. As always, you needn't concern yourself with any appearance of impropriety when expensing these indulgences to Cloud Imperium. As you said to Sandi not long ago when trying to convince her to spend $5000+ more on upgraded airfare like you choose to, "The fans will never know-- and you deserve to be comfortable." You do, indeed. 
G0RF fucked around with this message at 21:36 on Apr 23, 2016 |
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Apr 13, 2016 21:30
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I don't think I've ever said this, but you are a master wordsmith, G0RF.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:31
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Lladre posted:I id ask a legit question back there. You're not making a lot of sense. The normal Citizen argument for why you are not entitled to a refund within the EU is that it's a donation, or that it's only within 14 days of purchase as per the TOS or CIG can do whatever they like. However any person who is a kickstarter backer or made a purchase on the RSI site has a contract with CIG so normal law for contracts would apply for the purchase. In the UK this would involve writing to CIG to request a refund before going to court. There are a wide list of justifications you could use depending on when the purchase was made, misleading actions (Unfair Trading Regulations 2008), Sale of Goods Act 1979 (goods must be as described, of satisfactory quality and fit for purpose.) replaced by Consumer Rights Act October 2015, even the Misrepresentation Act 1967. However since June 2014, EU Directive 2011/83/EU came into force which gives anyone the right to a full refund up to 14 days after delivery of the last item in an order without having to give a reason, so in this example as SQ42 has not as yet been delivered, everyone in the EU is entitled to a full refund. Things would never reach court though as CIG would have to be crazy to try to defend the case, they'd just refund as soon as they receive a letter before action.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:32
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God. drat. G0RF that was beautiful.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:38
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G0RF posted:Guys, my new serious Effort Post is going to take me longer than I thought. Here is one slightly less so-- or Part 1 of it, anyway. Devine...
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Apr 13, 2016 21:40
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Beer4TheBeerGod posted:God. drat. G0RF that was beautiful. Agreed. Amazing Job.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:40
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Lladre posted:This is the sort of arm chair lawyering that I said earlier gets a pass because it fits the narrative. I freely admit that I know little of the law, which is why it was a question, rather than a statement of fact. I do think that all the goings on with gifting and the grey market allows the possibility of CIG being used to launder money (either with or without anyone at CIG being involved). When you also consider what seems to be an unnecessary number of companies involved with the creation of SC/SQ42, IMO it seems reasonable to ask these questions. Selling apples out of a cart at the local market doesn't constitute a financial service, because an original purchaser of the apples cannot leave the apples with the seller, taking an IOU instead, and that IOU then exchanged for money with a second consumer, who then takes the IOU to the seller to exchange for the apples. When the digital goods bought from CIG can be resold or given to a third party, then CIG are acting as a defacto holder of wealth, and money-launderers could use their digital-goods-buying service to convert dirty money into clean money, by gifting and the grey-market.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:40
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Your posts are bad because I never click the hyperlinks because I want to keep reading your posts because they're all 
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Apr 13, 2016 21:41
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Holy poo poo, G0RF has gone off the rails in the best possible way.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:41
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Mendrian posted:Maybe MoMA is Seraph. No way, he hasn't talked about A. Bitcoins or B. How he totally fucks 18 year olds at his NYC loft
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Apr 13, 2016 21:43
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Daztek posted:http://www.dereksmart.org/2016/04/star-citizen-the-ele/ Ok yeah that's a big deal. Nice work Derek!
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Apr 13, 2016 21:44
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Sorry I ever doubted you, thread.
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Apr 13, 2016 21:45
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With the way Fallout 4 was announced and released a few months later it'd be funny if they did they same with Starfield and just slamdunked SC
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Apr 13, 2016 21:45
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Bolow posted:No way, he hasn't talked about unless he sold that javelin
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