Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Star Citizen: Big MoMA's House

Jobbo_Fett: Mar 7, 2014; Slava Ukrayini; Clapping Larry

Ghostlight posted:

Ground floor scam
https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3ozzxs/my_son_asked_for_star_citizen_for_christmas_where/

First floor pledge
https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3p4e10/thank_you_so_much_for_all_the_gifts_of_starships/

Third floor prestige
https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3p4la5/enjoy/

Fourth floor suckers united no lessons learned

Hey, so this person did asked this thing (And she does stuff in NSFW subreddits, whoops lets ignore that BUT SHE TOTALLY DOES)

# ? Apr 27, 2016 11:13

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# ? Apr 30, 2024 04:21

Jobbo_Fett: Mar 7, 2014; Slava Ukrayini; Clapping Larry

Also lol at those dumb nerds.

I bet some of them expected to get photos of tits out of it.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 11:15

KiddieGrinder: Nov 15, 2005; HELP ME

Jobbo_Fett posted:

Also lol at those dumb nerds.

I bet some of them expected to get photos of tits out of it.

No! They did it because they're the most awesome welcoming friendly open minded community of all time! Why are you laughing?? :qq:

edit: Like all of Star Citizen they twisted getting scammed by someone as a good thing :lol:

# ? Apr 27, 2016 11:17

Jobbo_Fett: Mar 7, 2014; Slava Ukrayini; Clapping Larry

Whoever has that reddit account should log in and take screenshots of all the messages they received, sans Dickwulf photos of which there must be plenty.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 11:17

MedicineHut: Feb 25, 2016

AP posted:

I'm going to laugh if Moma is just Octopode trolling.

You mean Octopode is Toast!

MedicineHut fucked around with this message at 11:34 on Apr 27, 2016

# ? Apr 27, 2016 11:31

Cavendish: Feb 26, 2016

I just played some Battlefleet Gothic... and I suddenly realized;

This 2D glorified "Sid Meier�s; Pirates!" with spaceships puttering around like old sailingships from the 19th century has better ship physics and handling the SC.

How is this even possible?

# ? Apr 27, 2016 11:54

TTerrible: Jul 15, 2005

Cavendish posted:

I just played some Battlefleet Gothic... and I suddenly realized;

This 2D glorified "Sid Meier�s; Pirates!" with spaceships puttering around like old sailingships from the 19th century has better ship physics and handling the SC.

How is this even possible?

If you graded physics in video games on a scale from -10 to 10 SC isn't at zero. It's at -10, so even a blank new unity project with no colliders handles physics interplay better. They broke the default physics in Cryengine.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 11:56

Io_: Oct 15, 2012; woo woo; Pillbug

moveable shape posted:

There is some serious snake oil logic being applied to computer systems, and it's legitimately impressive how deep and profitable this has been for Chris. This claim about AI 'perceiving' the environment is right up there with 'you control your character whose hand controls the ship wheel whose mechanical wire system controls your movement'

This project has convinced a wide range of people that the things they always thought were true about video games actually are true. Bad AI is caused by cheap publishers and lazy dumb devs... a robust and adaptive system that has senses it uses and mental processes to reason and learn, that's as simple as building a tiny piece and then dumpling programmer hours in it.

These people are ignorant and they are loving it, Chris shows them it's okay to not think critically because things are really quite simple and he will take care of everything

I also recall reading an article with a developer where a more sophisticated AI was implemented for enemies and after play testing it had to be scrapped because defeating them way too difficult.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:13

Daztek: Jun 2, 2006

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:25

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

TTerrible posted:

If you graded physics in video games on a scale from -10 to 10 SC isn't at zero. It's at -10, so even a blank new unity project with no colliders handles physics interplay better. They broke the default physics in Cryengine.

StarCitizen.xml

code:

<?xml version="1.0"?>

   <content>
        <starsystems>false</starsystems>
        <trading>false</trading>
        <shipping>false</shipping>
        <mining>false</mining>
        <numberofships>16</numberofships>
        <proceduralgeneration>false</proceduralgeneration>
    </content>
<!--How about we change the above to just <content>false</content> amirite /8A-->
<!-- Pretty good idea but we shoudl get it to binary first so it doesn't look so bad /CR-->

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:27

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

Daztek posted:

Big deal, it's just a miner sale

get it?

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:27

Daztek: Jun 2, 2006

Tijuana Bibliophile posted:

Big deal, it's just a miner sale

get it?

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:29

Jamsta: Dec 16, 2006; Oh you want some too? Fuck you!

Truga posted:

VR is irrelevant for star citizen guys

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:29

Jobbo_Fett: Mar 7, 2014; Slava Ukrayini; Clapping Larry

Ben Lesnick, Developer

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:29

Happy Sisyphus: Nov 13, 2013; You take the blue paarp - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the red paarp - you stay in pre-alpha, and I show you how deep the sperg wallet goes.

friends, citizens, countrymen, lend me your ears
i come to bury croberts not to praise him
the evil that men do lives after them
the good is oft interred with their bones
so let it be with croberts. the noble smartus
hath told you croberts was ambitious
hath told you croberts was ambitious:
if it were so, it was a grievous fault,
and grievously hath croberts answer�d it.
here, under leave of smartus and the rest�
for smartus is an honourable man;
so are they all, all honourable men�
come I to speak on crobert�s court date.
he was my friend, faithful and just to me:
but smartus says he was ambitious;
And smartus is an honourable man.
he hath brought many pledges home to CIG
whose spergbucks did the general coffers fill:
Did this in croberts seem ambitious?
When that the poor have cried, croberts hath wept:
ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
yet smartus says he was ambitious;
and smartus is an honourable man.
you all did see that on the CitCon
i thrice presented him a kingly coffee machine,
which he did thrice refuse: was this ambition?
yet smartus says he was ambitious;
and, sure, he is an honourable man.
i speak not to disprove what smartus spoke,
but here I am to speak what I do know.
you all did love him once, not without cause:
what cause withholds you then, to mourn for him?
o judgment! thou art fled to brutish goons,
and men have lost their reason. bear with me;
my heart is in the courtroom there with croberts,
and I must pause till it come back to me.

~Ben Lesnick

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:45

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

Et tu leaver?

# ? Apr 27, 2016 12:54

iron buns: Jan 12, 2016

Silly reddit drama, brought to you by crazzyassbtich (That's Karl or Matilda, right?)

The whole thing is just absurd: https://www.reddit.com/r/DerekSmart/comments/4gg7da/the_derek_smart_still_thinks_the_pu_is_dead/d2hp9qb?context=10000

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:00

SurfaceDetail: Feb 17, 2016; by Cowcaster

Selling dreams.

When I buy a lottery ticket, I know on some level that I won't be winning. But I'm paying 2 dollars for the fun thought/thrill of "I have a non zero chance of becoming a millionaire today"

When I pay for SC. I have an absolute belief that it will be out in approximately 2 weeks. But I'm paying 2000 dollars for the fun thought/thrill of "I could murder my family and live forever in the 'Verse"

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:13

JainDoh: Nov 5, 2002; Omar strollin'

Ghostlight posted:

I remember this happening, but not this post. Holy poo poo.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:19

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

SurfaceDetail posted:

Selling dreams.

When I buy a lottery ticket, I know on some level that I won't be winning. But I'm paying 2 dollars for the fun thought/thrill of "I have a non zero chance of becoming a millionaire today"

When I pay for SC. I have an absolute belief that it will be out in approximately 2 weeks. But I'm paying 2000 dollars for the fun thought/thrill of "I could murder my family and live forever in the 'Verse"

Hey this scam gets your cats through college

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:26

Beet Wagon: Oct 19, 2015

Today I shot at a ship in Star Citizen. I must have hit the dude's power modulator, because as soon as I shot him his engines died and all the hatches popped. Sorry about all your O2, man.

Is a sentence that nobody will ever be able to honestly say.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:26

WhiskeyWhiskers: Oct 14, 2013; "هذا ليس عادلاً."
"هذا ليس عادلاً على الإطلاق."
"كان هناك وقت الآن."
(السياق الخفي: للقراءة)

Beet Wagon posted:

Today I shot at a ship in Star Citizen. I must have hit the dude's power modulator, because as soon as I shot him his engines died and all the hatches popped. Sorry about all your O2, man.

Is a sentence that nobody will ever be able to honestly say.

But boy will we be hearing about how someone totally did it in a few years and how great the game would have been if Derek hadn't single handedly caused its downfall.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:30

Alan Smithee: Jan 4, 2005; A man becomes preeminent, he's expected to have enthusiasms.

Enthusiasms, enthusiasms...

Derek Smart ruined bitcoin!

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:44

Tippis: Mar 21, 2008; It's yet another day in the wasteland.

TTerrible posted:

If you graded physics in video games on a scale from -10 to 10 SC isn't at zero. It's at -10, so even a blank new unity project with no colliders handles physics interplay better. They broke the default physics in Cryengine.

So presumably, Solar Plebeian would be a 1 or 2 on this scale?

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:51

Mr Fronts: Jan 31, 2016; Yo! The Mafia supports you. But don't tell no one. Spread the word.

WhiskeyWhiskers posted:

Aren't these in the game now? Or did Crobbers promise higher fidelity versions of them?

Yes... as long as a "wanted level" is something that causes your bedroom door knob to stop working until you set your clock back 1 hour to Summer Time.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 13:52

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

So you guys think Star Citizen will be GOTY 2042?

I'll be here all year

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:18

Lladre: Jun 28, 2011; Soiled Meat

SomethingJones posted:

Are all these things "supposedly" coming as well? Do you understand how stupid you look telling people on here what "is coming"? Are there maybe a few things here you can help me remove from the list if they're in the game, before I add in the 30 odd from the last couple of months?
[LIST]

You have Lowering Your Wanted Level on there twice. please stop padding the thing to make it worse than it is.s;af;la;lmdg;lmg;

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:19

orcinus: Feb 25, 2016; Fun Shoe

Samizdata posted:

Also, I would love to do one of those amazing effort posts, but I don't code, have already proven I suck at graphics, and my brain, miswired as it may be, just does NOT let me get too deep into the CIGiverse, so, yeah, sorry. These shitposts are what you get.

I code, i maybeslightlysomewhat don't completely suck at graphics, i've been to CIGverse and bailed out, but i still only shitpost. Because i'm lazy and unimaginative. So, shitpost away, friend.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:21

orcinus: Feb 25, 2016; Fun Shoe

TheLastRoboKy posted:

What he'd like to tell you is that CIG already developed an AI capable of running a server and overseeing all the NPC trade and combat bots that would interact with the players throughout the Persistant Universe. They had to scrap it though because much like the Microsoft Twitter bot it became horribly racist to the point that all the code has had to be completely refactored into a new custom built pipeline.

No, that's Ben's origin story.
You've mixed them up.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:23

SurfaceDetail: Feb 17, 2016; by Cowcaster

orcinus posted:

I code, i maybeslightlysomewhat don't completely suck at graphics, i've been to CIGverse and bailed out, but i still only shitpost. Because i'm lazy and unimaginative. So, shitpost away, friend.

If you don't give a flying gently caress about fps or crashes or playability then you can make some cool graphics and jpegs

But now that they are starting to refactor it its starting to range from poo poo-average/good game graphics.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:23

Tippis: Mar 21, 2008; It's yet another day in the wasteland.

orcinus posted:

No, that's Ben's origin story.
You've mixed them up.

Is there any proof that they're actually two different things? :tinfoil:

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:27

orcinus: Feb 25, 2016; Fun Shoe

Tippis posted:

Is there any proof that they're actually two different things?

I've got nothing.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:34

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

Who in the thread was into 3d printing? I wanna get into that stuff

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:36

bird with big dick: Oct 21, 2015

Ghostlight posted:

Ground floor scam
https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3ozzxs/my_son_asked_for_star_citizen_for_christmas_where/

First floor pledge
https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3p4e10/thank_you_so_much_for_all_the_gifts_of_starships/

Third floor prestige
https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/3p4la5/enjoy/

Fourth floor suckers united no lessons learned

Being stupid and gullible is a very good thing and IN NO WAY related to their continued belief in Crobberts and continued monetary support of this dumpster fire.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:37

Sickening: Jul 16, 2007; Black summer was the best summer.

So derek calls out moma and moma fails to return?

I am shocked.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:38

Lladre: Jun 28, 2011; Soiled Meat

Fat Shat Sings posted:

I just thought of something that adds serious points to the scam viewpoint.

CIG seems to be solely focusing on things that would absolve them of legal responsibility. Instead of working on the core foundation of a working game they are using a dead-end broken system way past the point anyone trying to make a game actually would. We argue over incompetence versus intention a lot.

But

-They went straight for the "making of" documentary.
-They are going for an inventory and Calling it "Persistence"
-The official word is that "Boarding / FPS / Promised Mechanics" are present in what they have offered.
-Their engine is completely broken (they even admit it's being re-written) but they keep developing it with things that coincidentally were legal obligations on their part

If they actually know that they can never deliver what they are promising and are just trying to protect themselves from the repercussions of loving over their fans, while STILL loving OVER THOSE FANS that is pure and simple scam territory. If the PU's only actual purpose is to absolve them of legal responsibility and they have no ability or intention to ever do anything but that with it, while still selling promises, that's an outright scam.

I've been saying this for a while.
Their model has shifted into how to mitigate damages when the eventual class action lawsuit comes crashing down on them.
Note I did not mention federal charges because I think they believe they are in the clear in that respect. (They most probably aren't)
Otherwise they would be finding some reason to do mo cap wok from a country without an extradition treaty. or they are so delusional that they don't think they are in harm's way. Which is probably it, look at all the big scam take downs.

I'm genuinely surprised that

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:39

Tijuana Bibliophile: Dec 30, 2008; Scratchmo

Sickening posted:

So derek calls out moma and moma fails to return?

I am shocked.

At least he didn't whine at the mods 'til they closed the thread this time

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:43

bird with big dick: Oct 21, 2015

Daztek posted:

Probably only two or maybe three days above their burn rate. Not good, commando. A ship that they spent months working on, and requires further months or years of work to ever be useable in the PU, only bought them five days or so of funding.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:44

Daztek: Jun 2, 2006

FrankieGoes posted:

Probably only two or maybe three days above their burn rate. Not good, commando. A ship that they spent months working on, and requires further months or years of work to ever be useable in the PU, only bought them five days or so of funding.

It's fine, they have all the money they need to finish Star Citizen and Squadron 42 and then some! Not to mention the gigantic money influx from when Squadron 42 releases later this year!

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:47

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# ? Apr 30, 2024 04:21

Lladre: Jun 28, 2011; Soiled Meat

Truga posted:

VR is irrelevant for star citizen guys

To be fair that graph looks like complete bullshit.
Cellphones have an established base of 3 and VR devices a 0.5 in the year 2016?

And in five years there will be more VR devices than phones currently in the world?
Again bullshit.

# ? Apr 27, 2016 14:48

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