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Facebook Aunt posted:Having thought about it for a few hours, I think those introduction cards are fine. An unambiguous signal that doesn't require an instant response. Nobody is pinned down in an awkward social situation. Nobody has to think of a graceful way to accept rejection. If I was an old-timey lady, I would definitely consult the spooning business guy. The other old ones are pathetic while the new ones are creepy and reek of social ineptitude. Leroy Dennui fucked around with this message at 15:40 on Sep 3, 2016 |
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Sep 3, 2016 15:34
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Facebook Aunt posted:I like you do you like me? How can you not include _ MAYBE here? Gotta hedge them bets.
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Sep 3, 2016 15:48
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What happens if that card gets checkboxed? 
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Sep 3, 2016 15:53
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I know plenty of girls those stupid cards would work on, given a social situation where asking them out would work too.
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Sep 3, 2016 16:02
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They are irregular but I don't think they're a bad idea per se. However, the probably not going to work on the kind of woman that these are going to end up being given to
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Sep 3, 2016 16:06
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How hard is it to just go up to a girl and say "Are you interested in a romantic relationship with me?"
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Sep 3, 2016 16:09
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Pick posted:They are irregular but I don't think they're a bad idea per se. However, the probably not going to work on the kind of woman that these are going to end up being given to How do you mean? Tbh, I picture then being given out like confetti. Guy Goodbody posted:How hard is it to just go up to a girl and say "Are you interested in a romantic relationship with me?" Saying it like that is just as spergy
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Sep 3, 2016 16:12
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I've known only one person who handed these out. It was at a party, and this cute woman who was really quirky handed me a card. Her autism was kind of endearing until about a month later she's calling me looking for a place to stay because she was kicked out of her house for spraying mace on her roommates.
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Sep 3, 2016 16:18
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Ante Christ posted:I've known only one person who handed these out. It was at a party, and this cute woman who was really quirky handed me a card. Her autism was kind of endearing until about a month later she's calling me looking for a place to stay because she was kicked out of her house for spraying mace on her roommates. The sad reality of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl.
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Sep 3, 2016 16:28
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I'm the guy who has a fax machine
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Sep 3, 2016 16:43
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SaltLick posted:I'm the guy who has a fax machine Well, hello, Mr. Alex Bender.
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Sep 3, 2016 16:47
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Benny Harvey posted:Saying it like that is just as spergy I've never tried to initiate a romantic relationship, but if I did, that's what I'd say. Short, to the point, no room for misunderstanding. The woman can just say no and then I'll leave
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Sep 3, 2016 17:12
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Guy Goodbody posted:I've never tried to initiate a romantic relationship, but if I did, that's what I'd say. Short, to the point, no room for misunderstanding. The woman can just say no and then I'll leave How about, "would you like to grab a coffee?", rather than coming across needy and clingy af with the romance comment right off the bat ?
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Sep 3, 2016 17:19
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crackton posted:How about, "would you like to grab a coffee?", rather than coming across needy and clingy af with the romance comment right off the bat ? Either way I'm gonna get the same answer, so might as well go with the quickest and least ambiguous option
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Sep 3, 2016 17:21
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crackton posted:How about, "would you like to grab a coffee?", rather than coming across needy and clingy af with the romance comment right off the bat ? She might think you're just being friendly. Gotta be up front, otherwise you're a Nice Guy
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Sep 3, 2016 17:21
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Guy Goodbody posted:Either way I'm gonna get the same answer, so might as well go with the quickest and least ambiguous option Nice guy spotted.
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Sep 3, 2016 17:22
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Guy Goodbody posted:Either way I'm gonna get the same answer, so might as well go with the quickest and least ambiguous option Or you could just say nothing
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Sep 3, 2016 17:22
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Benny Harvey posted:Or you could just say nothing Yeah, that's what I do. I was just speaking hypothetically.
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Sep 3, 2016 17:23
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Benny Harvey posted:She might think you're just being friendly. Gotta be up front, otherwise you're a Nice Guy In that case just skip all the dating crap and carry a ring in your pocket and Lemme know how that goes for you.
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Sep 3, 2016 17:25
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CONSULT ME ON SPOONING BUSINESS is going to get me so many right swipes on Tinder!
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Sep 3, 2016 17:40
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Guy Goodbody posted:How hard is it to just go up to a girl and say "Are you interested in a romantic relationship with me?" Guy Goodbody posted:I've never tried to initiate a romantic relationship, but if I did, that's what I'd say. Short, to the point, no room for misunderstanding. The woman can just say no and then I'll leave Guy Goodbody posted:Either way I'm gonna get the same answer, so might as well go with the quickest and least ambiguous option how many fedoras do you own
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Sep 3, 2016 18:35
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"Let's start a relationship" = "I don't know jack poo poo about you but I'm confident in my ability to plow through any incompatibilities with denial and guilt-tripping, and will consider it a full breakup if we discover next week that we don't really have any chemistry." "Let's get coffee" = "I want to find out if we're compatible for a real relationship, and actually care whether you and I will enjoy each others' company vs merely tolerating each other in exchange for sex. Also, I operate on a fairly high-context level, so I have plausible deniability if you reject me and so that if you don't do high-context communicate we can rule out a relationship quickly, since this is a major communication roadblock any time it occurs between two members of a relationship." "Let's get coffee and see if we'd enjoy dating each other" = "I want to find out if we're compatible for a real relationship, I don't do high-context hinting around, and if we go on a coffee date and discover that you have nine cats and hate David Bowie, I will bow out gracefully with zero drama." "I don't know you, but let's gently caress" = "Your vagina is all I care about, I don't care to disguise that fact, and I don't realize that promiscuous sex is extremely socially risky for women so I'm virtually guaranteed to get shot down unless you're impaired or make HORRIBLE life decisions." Staring silently from across a coffeeshop while sweating, red-faced, over your latest poem about her eyes = "I am gonna wear your skin."
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Sep 3, 2016 18:37
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WampaLord posted:How can you not include _ MAYBE here? drat, I knew I was forgetting something. Too many years since elementary school.
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Sep 3, 2016 18:49
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Leroy Dennui posted:If I was an old-timey lady, I would definitely consult the spooning business guy. The other old ones are pathetic while the new ones are creepy and reek of social ineptitude. Social ineptitude is fine tho. It seems like every third goon has some crippling social anxiety or something. Social anxiety doesn't make you a bad person, a bad friend, or a bad romantic prospect, it just makes it harder to get started. A shy boy and a shy girl might be a perfect match, but if they are both too shy to make a move the world just ends up with another cat lady and another bitter incel instead.
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Sep 3, 2016 18:55
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Uh, usually guys who want to be clear they're interested in casual sex introduce themselves less forwardly than that.
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Sep 3, 2016 19:04
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elise the great posted:"Let's start a relationship" = "I don't know jack poo poo about you but I'm confident in my ability to plow through any incompatibilities with denial and guilt-tripping, and will consider it a full breakup if we discover next week that we don't really have any chemistry." Does this count if you've been pretty close friends with the person for a while and you tell them you like them? Edit: grammar Beelerzebub fucked around with this message at 20:01 on Sep 3, 2016 |
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Sep 3, 2016 19:53
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Sep 3, 2016 20:14
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im the grease thumbprint
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Sep 3, 2016 20:15
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Why don't any of these dating cards include a dick pic cut to the chase dudes
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Sep 3, 2016 20:26
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CharlestonJew posted:Why don't any of these dating cards include a dick pic cut to the chase dudes It's on the back.
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Sep 3, 2016 20:27
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Pick a dick, any dick. Ah the 2 of chodes, nice choice
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Sep 3, 2016 20:34
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nigga crab pollock posted:im the grease thumbprint Being RMS, that probably ain't grease
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Sep 3, 2016 20:37
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Beelerzebub posted:Does this count if you've been pretty close friends with the person for a while and you tell them you like them? You could totally skip all that if you're pretty sure you've both had a chance to suss out your compatibility. It is, however, VERY IMPORTANT to make sure she doesn't feel like you're gonna do the Saran Wrap cling right out the gate. There is a natural and critical period at the beginning of a relationship where you haven't committed yet and are just trying things out. Some relationships bypass this because they have uncontrollable raw sexual energy and by the time you both come up for air you already know whether you like each other's music. (You will know if this is happening.) Most relationships, however, benefit from losing the idea that as soon as you go on a date you're in a relationship. The reason this (and other signs of desperation) freaks people out is that, for most of us, when we start dating someone we have to also consider whether the social and emotional risk is proportionate to the investment. If we're looking at investing two coffee dates, things might go well and warrant more investment, or they might go badly and cost us our investment. If the cost of a bad outcome from two coffee dates is a guilt-tripping, crying, clinging "ex-boyfriend" who has already said "I love you" and will maybe self-destruct when we bail, we want nothing to do with that. We don't want to be responsible for your misery and we don't want to have to explain to our parents who that guy is on our Facebook wall calling us "whore oval office slags." If you're p sure the worst outcome is an awkward latte and a cordial split, there's no reason on earth not to give it a chance. e. This goes triple if you're already friends. She's primed to say no because this dramatically increases the implied investment, which means you're within your rights socially to escalate that risk pretty far. Making it clear that you plan to keep the risk low makes it MUCH easier for her to invest. Of course if you're already hopelessly in love with her and definitely gonna weep like a Louisiana seawall if it doesn't work out, it's all a matter of how much risk she and you are both willing to run. elise the great fucked around with this message at 20:57 on Sep 3, 2016 |
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Sep 3, 2016 20:53
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Varg posted:how many fedoras do you own 
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Sep 3, 2016 21:03
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E1M1 posted:I treated a female cashier like a human being one time and she went "huh durr durr durr what do you want a cookie?!", but to be fair this was at Mrs. Fields and she was profoundly disabled This is from a while back, but it bears repeating. Guy Goodbody posted:I've never tried to initiate a romantic relationship We can tell.
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Sep 3, 2016 22:54
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maybe we combine the best of both worlds and have negs printed on cards I can imagined "heyy girl i bet you're TOO dumb to even want fukk?" with a nice, tasteful cream background.
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Sep 4, 2016 01:11
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Negging is just the dumbest poo poo. Never met any actual PUAs, but I simply can't follow their reasoning. "Oh man, she is totally out of my league! Wait a sec! If I make her feel like complete puketrash and destroy her entire day's worth of self esteem and pride, she won't care about herself at all anymore and I can swoop in and gently caress her!" It's like, do you hear yourself, you slug-eating amphibian? You're actually insulting yourself, you despicable shitbrain.
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Sep 4, 2016 01:26
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Calico Heart posted:maybe we combine the best of both worlds and have negs printed on cards With a dick pic (scaled up of course) on the back
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Sep 4, 2016 01:29
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phasmid posted:Negging is just the dumbest poo poo. Never met any actual PUAs, but I simply can't follow their reasoning. i think their train of thought isn't that they are pursuing people out of their league*, it's that women are "Whore bitches" and are turning them down for any number of reasons that are the woman's fault, not theirs. Negging them therefore doesn't make the guy think he is the bad one bringing someone down to his level, just that he has given a woman the equivalent of a social slap in the face and startled her into servicing him It's the same concept as those bone structure guys. They don't think they are ugly they are just saying women are creatures of instinct that are attracted to specific shapes of skull without conscious thought, justifying why they (a perfectly attractive person in their opinion) is being passed up for other less attractive guys *(I don't know much about PUAs so if the negging thing is literally based around shooting out of your league then ignore what i said)
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Sep 4, 2016 01:30
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There was this one show I loved called The Pick Up Artist because the entire premise was a cool sex dude teaches fat nerds how to pick up women, but the guy they picked was the scrawniest, dorkiest, weeniest guy they could have loving found. He never once sounded remotely confident in himself or what he was saying, he dressed like a complete twat complete with fluffy top hat and magician vest and went by the name "Mystery". I constantly wondered if the girls who were into him at clubs were plants because he just came across as the biggest loving clown. The reason I bring it up is because in an episode Mystery explained that a neg was "an innocuous comment that made you seem taken/uninterested in a girl so she wouldn't feel threatened by you and you'd have more fun". Dumb? Yes! But nowhere near as malignant as what we consider negs now. I wonder if the insulting negs maybe grew out of dorks not getting that concept for real though mystery is king dork  even in this publicity photo he looks like a rabbit in the headlights
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Sep 4, 2016 01:38
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