hifi posted:

jerry richardson is going to stumble on blacked.com and mandate circumcision as well as no tattoos

MC2552John posted:

I expected this to be like Worldstar Hiphop and it wasn't. It wasn't at all. The circumcision bit makes more sense now.

Malachite_Dragon posted:

So basically another white-noise poster to add to the ignore list

Much like my own posting, but with more screaming

mind the walrus posted:

To be completely fair Weird Al has made a good go of it... Even though he's got musical chops and is pretty much the only really successful artist at that form...

KomodoWagon posted:

I'm the giant block of big latin+greek words applied to communicate "dude did coke, ruined his own butthole with acid"

mind the walrus posted:

This is better as a non-sequiter:

KomodoWagon posted:

How about comparing it to other languages that aren't specifically derived and simplified from Latin? Such as, say, Arabic or Mandarin or rear end eating.

Avshalom posted:

i am the last and greatest prophet of israel. oh lord, oh lord lend your strength to my voice. in the year 2018 hillary clinton is a low-earth orbit angel. bernie sanders has become one with the mountains and the sky. barack obama is a smear of sacred poo. vladimir putin hunts death from the back of a mule. ariel sharon is still sleeping. george w bush has given himself over to the worms. i am with child. trump strangles the world with the insatiable tendrils of his body; he bleeds oil and shits diamonds and into his maw whole countries vanish and he grinds them up into a red slurry of bones and gravel. the elephants are extinct. the whales are extinct. my libido is extinct. my naked body is as sleek as polished soapstone but my vagina has contracted into nothingness. it's an anti-space, a niche so tight and unwelcoming that its presence inverts and undoes space itself - a black hole into which trump will be sucked, drawn out into fleshy strings and annihilated forever

The Saddest Rhino posted:

weird al is only good sometimes and not beyond criticism

Dr. AA Hazredstein posted:

Weird Al is very talented and very dedicated to his art, but I wouldn't say his lyrics themselves are the strongest point.

A guy who named himself after an MST3k character, in 2006 posted:

Have you ever noticed that the “Weird” in “Weird” Al is in quotations? That’s because he’s not weird. Following this convention, he could also be called “Funny” Al or “Profitable” Al Yankovic. But “Weird” Al is weird in the same sense that inserting hilarious uses of the words “cheese” and “monkey” into your dialogue would be. Spam! If you laughed at that, turn your computer off and leave this place. There is nothing for you here.

If “Weird” Al provides any service to this world, it’s that he shows us who is truly developmentally disabled. Do you know someone who still listens to “Weird” Al? Is this person over fourteen? If you answered “yes” to both of these questions, sever all ties, burn all evidence, and strategically use a claw hammer on different parts of your skull to eliminate all memories(you may want to read a book about this practice first). “Weird” Al’s parodies are supposed to be the gateway drug to real music, and the denial of Al’s music marks a passage into adulthood where one may say, “I would like to listen to this song, but I no longer want it to be about potatoes.” If real music is sex, then “Weird” Al is the clumsy unfinished preteen handjob, although “Weird” Al fans may not understand this analogy for obvious reasons. I know what you’re thinking, “But my really cool science teacher in middle school loved ‘Weird’ Al and he wore novelty ties and one day he melted a penny with chemicals!” Take a minute to think about this person. I don't know how long you've been away from home but I guarantee you his obituary read "single man slips while mopping studio apartment; eaten by housecats before he can make it to pre-paid cell phone."

If you think “Weird” Al has a place in the fast-paced music world of today, I have news for you: he’s been irrelevant since the invention of karaoke. And since karaoke was invented before he started performing(thanks Wikipedia), Al has always been irrelevant. The day a townie got high in his Camaro and changed Boston’s “More than a Feelin’” to “More than a Peelin’ (being about bananas or some such poo poo)” should have been the day Al vanished from existence, or dropped his musical aspirations to become something more fitting, like the office cut-up at a large packaging firm or the world’s most interesting compost heap.

Snooze Cruise posted:

It's funny how someone describing something "monkey cheese" has turn more into an indicator for that person than what they are describing.

1stGear posted:

Weird Al slipped a cunnilingus joke into one of his songs, so he's okay in my book.

TheBigAristotle posted:

It's gonna be real slow at work today, gotta figure out what I can pull off with 3 action figures and a bat'leth letter opener.

laserghost posted:

Most of the ISIS videos, probably

Dr. Arbitrary posted:

Buy "Time Management for System Administrators"

Collateral Damage posted:

I bought that, I haven't had time to read it yet.

Bhodi posted:

Counterpoint: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUQDzj6R3p4

LORD OF BOOTY posted:

does anyone have the story of the guy who drained his rear end cyst with a shop-vac

Solice Kirsk posted:

Of course you'd want that.

MilitantBlackGuy posted:

gonna be Dragon/Steel with his 'Bulletproof' ability and metal lookin' scales

oddium posted:

check out these metal scales (as in guitar). once rocksmith finishes downloading. sorry it's almost done. sorry

Improbable Lobster posted:

Burt Sexual posted:

Idgi

wants to gently caress robots 2 posted:

This anime girl mask is the worst thing that ever happened to me and my best friend. I needed to get my oil changed one day and we decided to go since there was nothing else to do. The Jiffy Lube is sort of in a bad area of town and it was also right next to a porn store. We had to kill time so whatever, we went and browsed porn in a nice air conditioned building.

There was a clearance bin of opened items and on top of the pile was this anime mask and body suit. You're probably thinking hell no I wouldn't buy anything opened at a porn store. But Halloween is coming up and it was five bucks for the set. Maybe someone hosed in it, so what. I bought the anime mask and suit, and my bro bought the white rabbit one.

An anime girl suit, I mean when have you seen that on Halloween, it's great.

We pick up my car and got back to my place. I tried it on to make sure it fit, and it's sort of spandex-y so yeah it fit. My bro tried on his rabbit body suit and it was pretty funny. We posed in front of the bathroom mirror taking selfies for snapchat and poo poo, and I hopped around and made the little ribbon part on the back of the skirt flip into the air like in the animes.

I was totally messing around and acted like I was teasing him with my butt. I bumped him with my hips and put my hand over my mouth and did my best impression of an anime girl laugh. That's when I felt something and noticed he wasn't laughing. Motherfucker popped a boner at me dude.

I'm not loving gay, alright. I know my bro isn't either. Maybe it's the masks, I don't know, but we froze for a second and neither of us pulled away. Suddenly the scene in the mirror was of a dude in a bunny mask and an anime girl looking like she wanted to gently caress. The best I can describe it is I wanted to see them gently caress too, and I just pretended I wasn't the one in the anime girl mask.

I leaned over the counter and I was facing the mirror so I couldn't see what he was doing, but I felt it I guess. It was like a POV porno except I could feel what the anime girl felt as I watched in the mirror.

It was weird because I didn't want to talk, otherwise that would break the illusion that I wasn't there, and that I was watching a real anime girl in the reflection. We didn't talk. I stayed in the anime girl suit while he got changed and left.

That was three weeks ago and we still haven't said a word to each other.

A couple days later he showed up as usual but with a backpack, and I knew what was in it. And I was okay with it. I changed into my anime suit and by the time I got back to the living room he was already changed into his getup.

I say it's the worst thing that ever happened to me and my best bro, but then again we're both getting hosed on the regular now and anime girls with dicks is sort of a thing, so. I guess it's not totally bad, it's just really loving weird.

I'm pretty sure if I wanted to not do this anymore I could break the illusion by taking the mask off and showing my face. And you know, talking. If he still wants to keep doing this after that I swear to god I'm going to kick his rear end for being a fagot

Moon Slayer posted:

Context: The Something Awful Forums › Discussion › Debate & Discussion: You have a constitutional right to be a dumbass › C-SPAM › Trump Toxx: "Grab 'em by the pussy" - President Trump













There's a lot more after that, but you get the idea.

The MSJ posted:

Solice Kirsk posted:

Of course you'd want that.

LORD OF BOOTY posted:

I'm asking about it because I just found out that that dude might be a friend of a friend, I wanna send my buddy the post and see if it's the same dude

e: if it's not the same dude, that means there's more than one SA goon who's used a shopvac to bust open a cyst on their rear end, which sort of terrifies me