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boviscopophobic
Feb 5, 2016

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Flarpy
Aug 13, 2016

Dongicus posted:

anyone got some funny graphs

Nickelback
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sIlNIVXpIns

ZekeNY
Jun 13, 2013

Probably AFK

thatguy posted:

Why is our hero Arf only getting sixers? Step it up Beer/Beet.

And/or probation anyone who replies to him.

Sillybones
Aug 10, 2013

go away,
spooky skeleton,
go away

What we learn here is that despite being a complete clusterfuck, it still caused people to pull out their wallets.

Kakarot
Jul 20, 2013

by zen death robot
Buglord

ArfJason posted:

Hey guys, reminder that i got doxxed by the chillotopia that is the star citizen megathread because i pointed out its not normal to spend months carefully and obsessively following people online to laugh at their family, posting graphs because the number is funnier than the other numvber or doxxing people, which has happened before in this thread by an ex mod. I hope you all realize how insane this is.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

lol

Rad Russian
Aug 15, 2007

Soviet Power Supreme!

Sillybones posted:

What we learn here is that despite being a complete clusterfuck, it still caused people to pull out their wallets.

5 years from now it will be just a sleleton crew of Crobbler, Sandy, and the fatman streaming themselves from a couch for 3 hours talking gibberish and the leftover 1000 broken true believers pledging to pay for their housing and food for yet another year.

Amarcarts
Feb 21, 2007

This looks a lot like suffering.
I just hope it doesn't turn into some Jonestown sort of thing

HycoCam
Jul 14, 2016

You should have backed Transverse!

ArfJason posted:

Hey guys, reminder that i got doxxed by the chillotopia that is the star citizen megathread because i pointed out its not normal to spend months carefully and obsessively following people online to laugh at their family, posting graphs because the number is funnier than the other numvber or doxxing people, which has happened before in this thread by an ex mod. I hope you all realize how insane this is.
The ship I recommend to help with your lack of doxxing skills: https://vimeo.com/171601888

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Amarcarts posted:

I just hope it doesn't turn into some Jonestown sort of thing

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

TheLightPurges posted:

Tijuana you have to own her too its only fair after the roasting I got


Haha! You got me. :)

Sunswipe
Feb 5, 2016

by Fluffdaddy

Amarcarts posted:

I just hope it doesn't turn into some Jonestown sort of thing

Jared: It is ready, oh Wise and Powerful Crobbler. 1000 glasses of poisoned Kool-Aid, all laid out and ready to transport you and your faithful to the Promised 'Verse.
Chris: Uh um paaarp yeah
*Chris waves his hands wildly, knocking a robed acolyte from the raised altar*
Sandi: And my glass?
Jared: Oh High Priestess of Marketing, your glass is prepared. It is the finest the world has ever known. Hand-crafted by the finest glass-blowing machines in all of China, encrusted with the finest fake cubic zirconia. No expense has been spared. The... The Backers Will Never Know.
*Jared chokes back a sob at saying the holiest of holy words for the last time and performs what he knows will be his final ritual T-Pose*
Chris: Yarp burr whurm up.
Jared: I... er...
Sandi: He means "get on with it," you oaf!
Jared: Of course, your skinniness. To the Room of Ascension!
*Jared leads them through the space door. 999 empty paper cups litter the floor*
Jared: What the...? The faithful aren't here yet, who's drunk all that? Who COULD drink all that?
*Ben belches loudly in the corner, and puts the expensive bling-encrusted glass on a table*
Jared: Son of a... I should've used Diet Coke, he'd never have touched that.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:


Nice. The well has run dry yet tears will flow forever.

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

TheLightPurges posted:

When I graduated high school I moved out of state to a fairly well paying industrial job. I got bad social anxiety and depression so it wasn't exactly the best experience. I moved up there by myself, lived on my own, and didn't know anybody up there. I think if anyone else was given the opportunity of a clean slate with a well paying 9-5 job they would excel; not me though.

I don't got much experience talking to anyone, more specifically the ladies. I'm addicted to porn and I hate it. I often masturbate 4 times a day to any fetishes you can imagine. So since this was the first time I lived on my own, I decided to get a little frisky and buy a toy.

I bought this giant replica rear end/vagina replica of some porn star I can't remember and a couple starter dildos for the prostate off Adam and Eve.

Well the dildos came in first so I used them. I was feeling a little constipated earlier in the day but didn't think nothing of it. After reaching climax I took the dildo out, stood up and there was a small puddle of poo. Instead of cleaning it up I just slept on the opposite side of the bed for 4 months.

I was really excited when my rear end came in. I named her Susan. I had never used anything like it before, the pleasure was amazing. The first 6 times were great, but after a while she started to stink because I didn't clean her out.

I remember leaving one weekend to visit my family back home and when I came back it was like a horror scene. Fruit flies were everywhere, they were coming straight out of Susan's Anus. The stench of dried lube and rotten cum was too much....

I spent well into the triple digits on Susan though so I got one last round in. It was weird taking that shower and having to wash off dead fruit flies off my dick.

Anyway, that was about 8 years ago now and Star Citizen is still the most hosed up thing I've ever seen.

:stare:

That came out of nowhere!

Spatial
Nov 15, 2007

They took down the stream video from Youtube, but I saved it yesterday. If anyone wants it I'll upload it somewhere.

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

Samizdata posted:

I like the hell out of you, but, I have to ask... WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE LIKE THAT? Tell me to not imagine something? I am going to have to go take a shitposting break to scrub myself bloody under scalding hot water (I doubt it will make the shuddering pass though).

I'm not sure. :ohdear:

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Spatial posted:

They took down the stream video from Youtube, but I saved it yesterday. If anyone wants it I'll upload it somewhere.

Do it to youtube and title it Star Citizen 2016 Holiday Live Stream

grimcreaper
Jan 7, 2012

ArfJason posted:

Hey guys, reminder that i got doxxed by the chillotopia that is the star citizen megathread because i pointed out its not normal to spend months carefully and obsessively following people online to laugh at their family, posting graphs because the number is funnier than the other numvber or doxxing people, which has happened before in this thread by an ex mod. I hope you all realize how insane this is.

(USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)

How did you get doxxed? I tried hard to get people to doxx me and no one did. You should doxx me next. Dooooooo eeeeet! I demand to be doxx ed privatly.

grimcreaper
Jan 7, 2012

Don't doxx me. Unless you want to. That's your choice. But it's bad. ArfJason is bad. Don't be like him.

Thoatse
Feb 29, 2016

Lol said the scorpion, lmao

spacetoaster posted:

Do it to youtube and title it Star Citizen 2016 Holiday Live Stream


Perfect.

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

Samizdata posted:

Have I mentioned killing anyone? :pgabz:, are you :argh: again? Titanic, are you currently fueled by your boundless rage?

Oh, wait, no. YOU are the only person talking about killing people. Go away, sit in your corner, and wank yourself to sleep thinking you are even cohabiting the same reality we are.

My anger and rage against this game is .. not there at all. I'm not sure if I'm doing it right. :ohdear:

I don't even care about the Christmas video thing being a disaster for either side.

I think most everybody knows what's going to happen, just not the how, and not then when. I'm patient so it can go on as long as it wants. :shobon:

Though the fyad guy is really try hard. If it were funny it'd be ok. The tane guy was redeeming but this one is just really corny. But if it helps him sleep at night, more power to him I guess. He's just creepy. I hope he's getting lots of :lol:s and Internet fame for it though so it's not just shameful all around. Good luck, fyad friend! :3:

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Thoatse posted:

Perfect.

He should expect a lot of negativity though.

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

peter gabriel posted:

The idea that Chris Roberts even for a millisecond listened to, let alone valued the opinion of his customers is truly hilarious

Agreed.

The man doesn't care about his backers, only the money. It's still up in the air if he even wrote the famous Escapist response.

He doesn't post on his own forums, the one time he did play the game it was like he never saw it before, he's on video describing distinct systems in his own game as "this thing" and "that thing" like he doesn't know what they are outside of what they look like. His only passion for the project has been directing actors.

How any backer thinks that he reads their concerns on his own forum, or anywhere else, is hilarious.

He just wants the money. Don't mean to burst dream bubbles, but that's the cold hard truth. He's a used car salesman trying to sell a Ferrari without an engine for the full price of a real Ferrari by never opening the hood, starting it, or letting you hear the purr of the motor. It's a lie, and a fraud, and it's so blatant I'm still shocked it's taken this long for people to see it. :shrug:

Thoatse
Feb 29, 2016

Lol said the scorpion, lmao

spacetoaster posted:

He should expect a lot of negativity though.


Christ Roberts negtivity scenes seem to be common this year.

Runa
Feb 13, 2011

The Titanic posted:

My anger and rage against this game is .. not there at all. I'm not sure if I'm doing it right. :ohdear:

I don't even care about the Christmas video thing being a disaster for either side.

I think most everybody knows what's going to happen, just not the how, and not then when. I'm patient so it can go on as long as it wants. :shobon:

Though the fyad guy is really try hard. If it were funny it'd be ok. The tane guy was redeeming but this one is just really corny. But if it helps him sleep at night, more power to him I guess. He's just creepy. I hope he's getting lots of :lol:s and Internet fame for it though so it's not just shameful all around. Good luck, fyad friend! :3:

I mean, that metal gear codec post was pretty good imo

alf_pogs
Feb 15, 2012


hahaha did that open letter to cig get deleted? i cant see it anymore

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

Rad Russian posted:

5 years from now it will be just a sleleton crew of Crobbler, Sandy, and the fatman streaming themselves from a couch for 3 hours talking gibberish and the leftover 1000 broken true believers pledging to pay for their housing and food for yet another year.

I think once the money stops pouring in Chris & Sandi will leave the project while the leaving is good. Probably the shell companies will go away to with other staff because that'll be the remaining amounts of money. There might be a tiny amount left but not enough to actually complete Star Citizen.

At one time I figured they'd at minimum deliver Sq42, because it was an arena shooter with distinct levels separated by fmv or real time cutscenes. That's not exactly ground breaking technology. However after seeing those ship ads literally ripping off another car show, the animation and models are from 2006 or so.

They're not close to even Witcher 3 that used pretty nice phonetic morph targets, much less something more dedicated like Tomb Raider. With Chris trying to "set the bar" and he's so heinously behind in everything, and apparently has next to nothing done for Sq42 (Vandull rebuilds this late in the game != almost done game), I doubt we'll even see that.

I'm also starting to doubt if the MVP will even be an MVP. It might just be a P (a Product, maybe?). The minimum may be so very low that it isn't even functional all the way through.

The higher the curtain rises, the angrier the backers will get. I think we're all going to be in for a treat when we all see just how painfully little $130 million dollars, 13 international companies or so, and around 300 employees have done. This may be one of the biggest flops in video game history, where even a game the quality of an Early Access title isn't even produced.

The Titanic fucked around with this message at 05:05 on Dec 18, 2016

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

Xarbala posted:

I mean, that metal gear codec post was pretty good imo

Yeah that one was ok. :)

Beer4TheBeerGod
Aug 23, 2004
Exciting Lemon

spacetoaster posted:

Do it to youtube and title it Star Citizen 2016 Holiday Live Stream

Risc1911
Mar 1, 2016

"Thanks for the configuration tips"

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

Risc1911 posted:

"Thanks for the configuration tips"


Aw man. He forgot:
code:

ENABLE_COMPLETE_GAME = 1;
OVERLAY_CODE_ON_IDEAS = 1;

These guys might not know as much about game development as they think. I think they need to go back to Roberts Space University and actually finish their degrees instead of just say they have one. Everybody knows that only works in marketing and marine biology.

Tokyo Sexwale
Jul 30, 2003

Risc1911 posted:

"Thanks for the configuration tips"


yeah I wonder if that guy has ever told anyone they don't understand game development

Tippis
Mar 21, 2008

It's yet another day in the wasteland.

thatguy posted:

Why is our hero Arf only getting sixers? Step it up Beer/Beet.

Because that's all they can give him — any more and FAU reverts it because he thinks that making GBS threads up a thread with no-content troll posts and backseat modding is very good and completely what everyone wants from SA.

spacetoaster
Feb 10, 2014

Spatial posted:

They took down the stream video from Youtube, but I saved it yesterday. If anyone wants it I'll upload it somewhere.

Have you uploaded it to youtube yet?

nawledgelambo
Nov 8, 2016

Immersion chariot


lol, the fuckin backwards logic of these people

Mr Fronts
Jan 31, 2016

Yo! The Mafia supports you. But don't tell no one. Spread the word.

Risc1911 posted:

"Thanks for the configuration tips"


pgabz, look at all these people hacking their cfg files! Look what you've done - you should be ashamed of yourself.

Beer4TheBeerGod
Aug 23, 2004
Exciting Lemon

Tippis posted:

Because that's all they can give him — any more and FAU reverts it because he thinks that making GBS threads up a thread with no-content troll posts and backseat modding is very good and completely what everyone wants from SA.

FAU does not give enough of a poo poo to put forward that much effort. I don't know who reverted the last one, but if we want to give more than six hours we have to submitted request that doesn't always get approved.

I.N.R.I
May 26, 2011

AlbieQuirky posted:

I.N.R.I, I took your post to heart and did do some soul-searching, and realized that the reason I do terrible, terrible things like look at a picture of a lady and take two minutes to add up the estimated retail value of her clothes and jewelry in response to someone's question about that is because

MY PARENTS ARE DEAD

So, I.N.R.I, will you adopt me? I promise I will call you every single day.

Help me, I.N.R.I, you're my only hope

:mrgw:

boviscopophobic
Feb 5, 2016

Thoatse posted:

Christ Roberts negtivity scenes seem to be common this year.

They don't even seem seasonal anymore, it practically seems like a year-round thing nowadays.

Decrepus
May 21, 2008

In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.


Am open mind is like a fortress with its gates unparped.

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Breetai
Nov 6, 2005

🥄Mah spoon is too big!🍌
Top placement.

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