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Cough Drop The Beat posted:My [22/F] boyfriend's [23/M] mother [50s/F] recommended a self-help book for me. Am I crazy for being wildly offended? ...  for gently caress's sake, dump your boyfriend before he cheats on you with his mom
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Mar 9, 2017 22:54
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It's 3 A.M. she won't put out Let's go make out with my mom Make out with my mom's mom
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Mar 9, 2017 22:55
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Cough Drop The Beat posted:My [22/F] boyfriend's [23/M] mother [50s/F] recommended a self-help book for me. Am I crazy for being wildly offended? amazing I'm just going to assume that "your lack of a strong male role model warped your sexuality" is code for "you never had a goonish/abusive father or uncle imprint on you in adolescence that it was Always Your Duty To Put Out even if you were on antibiotics for a goddamn UTI" Also, belatedly: the only way Dog Heelys would be better, both in comedy value and in potential profit, would be if they were Horse Heelys.
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Mar 9, 2017 22:58
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ArbitraryC posted:It's 3 A.M. I keep trying to match this to the MB20 song and it's not working, help me out here e: thanks! VVVV Rockman Reserve fucked around with this message at 23:15 on Mar 9, 2017 |
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Mar 9, 2017 22:59
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food court bailiff posted:I keep trying to match this to the MB20 song and it's not working, help me out here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6HHFNOrAyQI
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Mar 9, 2017 23:00
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Aww baby she won't put out, you want mommy to help?
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Mar 9, 2017 23:00
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Antivehicular posted:Also, belatedly: the only way Dog Heelys would be better, both in comedy value and in potential profit, would be if they were Horse Heelys. this would be an extremely efficient way to kill a horse
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Mar 9, 2017 23:02
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Cough Drop The Beat posted:My [22/F] boyfriend's [23/M] mother [50s/F] recommended a self-help book for me. Am I crazy for being wildly offended? Run for the hills! Also, change all passwords, warn all Facebook friends, etc. Also, hit him. Like, hard. Use knuckles, aim for the nose, not the jaw. Make him cry and run home to mommy. Please, it'll be funny. loving pathetic excuse for a man. Makes a person ashamed of having a y-chromosome.
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Mar 9, 2017 23:02
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ArbitraryC posted:It's 3 A.M.
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Mar 9, 2017 23:03
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mommy kiss your dick all better?
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Mar 10, 2017 00:05
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Pick posted:mommy kiss your dick all better? Ever see the Little Britain sketches with the adult who breastfeeds? That is what I'm picturing in this situation Bitty
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Mar 10, 2017 00:07
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54 40 or gently caress posted:Ever see the Little Britain sketches with the adult who breastfeeds? That is what I'm picturing in this situation i haven't seen those but I did just google "adult breastfeeding" bc apparently I hate myself and want to introduce madness to my brain http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/features/inside-the-misunderstood-world-of-adult-breastfeeding-w436234 quote:Their home appears cozy and comfortable, and Garett works long hours while Ellie stays home and tends to household needs. They also engage in what they call "feeding" – Ellie induces lactation and produces breast milk for Garett to consume.  whatever floats your boat I guess...
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Mar 10, 2017 00:11
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Got a sister of a friend who breastfeeds her 3 year old still. Her 3 year old is also unvaccinated, has never eaten cooked food that family members didnt smuggle her, and has never slept through the night. I could fill a thread with her bad decisions but basically dont take life advice from people who breastfeed things that can talk.
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Mar 10, 2017 00:15
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Barudak posted:Got a sister of a friend who breastfeeds her 3 year old still. Her 3 year old is also unvaccinated, has never eaten cooked food that family members didnt smuggle her, and has never slept through the night. it shorted my furby
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Mar 10, 2017 00:16
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Awww did my widdle boy not get to give his girlfriend the cummies, you know mommy will always want them.
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Mar 10, 2017 00:16
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Pick posted:it shorted my furby May May oh-no. Edit: Gonna go evaluate my life, double checked the Furbish for accuracy. Barudak fucked around with this message at 00:24 on Mar 10, 2017 |
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Mar 10, 2017 00:21
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If you want to nurse from your partner's bosom then that's your business and TBH I don't know if I even think that's all that weird compared to other kinks. All that said, nobody really needs to hear about it. So just… c'mon, pervs.
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Mar 10, 2017 00:26
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ArbitraryC posted:Awww did my widdle boy not get to give his girlfriend the cummies, you know mommy will always want them. Plz stop
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Mar 10, 2017 00:28
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fruit on the bottom posted:If you want to nurse from your partner's bosom then that's your business and TBH I don't know if I even think that's all that weird compared to other kinks. IIRC as long as you are breastfeeding regularly you can't get pregnant due to the hormones too so free birth control? 
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Mar 10, 2017 00:40
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ArbitraryC posted:Awww did my widdle boy not get to give his girlfriend the cummies, you know mommy will always want them. I actually whimpered like an abused dog when I read this, thanks
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Mar 10, 2017 00:41
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54 40 or gently caress posted:IIRC as long as you are breastfeeding regularly you can't get pregnant due to the hormones too so free birth control? Its good birth control but it aint flawless by any means. Dont use it as your only method. Instead, rely on the fact that you are breastfeeding a grown adult and therefore not having sex to avoid babies.
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Mar 10, 2017 00:42
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My bf [21m] has a sex tally including one dedicated to me submitted 9 months ago quote:We've been dating for less than a year and a few months ago decided to take our relationship seriously. Looking through her post history, there's a treasure trove of sexytimes: [advice] denied oral on moral grounds submitted 1 year ago quote:I [f/18] have been having sex with someone for maybe 5 months now. Early on I had asked to receive oral however he said no due to his culture which denigrates males giving it and while we're raised in a rather sexually liberal country he concluded with 'maybe later on', and expected me to give him oral. I somewhat intrinsically accepted this notion and gave him oral occasionally without any expectations. Will he commit (or why won't he) ? (self.fPUA) submitted 1 year ago quote:I have been seeing/dating this guy for maybe 10 months now. We have a good connection, growing attraction and lots of good sex. A few months into this thing, he once randomly brought up that he's not ready for commitment, is a better person as he is now etc etc, and I simply replied with 'okay that's fine' and asked if he doesn't trust me cause of his past where a girl cheated on him to which he said kind of.
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Mar 10, 2017 00:50
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Dude is counting down the fucks until they set him free.
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Mar 10, 2017 00:53
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Cough Drop The Beat posted:My [22/F] boyfriend's [23/M] mother [50s/F] recommended a self-help book for me. Am I crazy for being wildly offended? oh man this is amazing. "Mommmmmmmyyyyyyy she won't put my dingaling in her hoohah, what do?"
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Mar 10, 2017 01:01
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a man who won't eat pussy is a shameful man imoareyoucontagious posted:I actually whimpered like an abused dog when I read this, thanks same 
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Mar 10, 2017 01:04
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Fullhouse posted:this would be an extremely efficient way to kill a horse You say that like it's a problem, instead of a brilliant opportunity to cross-market the product for people whose children/partners bought horses they can't support and are looking for any plausible way to get rid of these loving things Horse Heelys: For When You Can't Sneak Freckles Into the Slaughter Truck
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Mar 10, 2017 01:06
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My take on the Aussie couple is that boyfriend's main fault was passive-aggresively telling OP "you're being immature if you don't acquiesce to my will and abandon your sister  " instead of just admitting he can't handle it and has to leave.Cough Drop The Beat posted:My [22/F] boyfriend's [23/M] mother [50s/F] recommended a self-help book for me. Am I crazy for being wildly offended? Mommy issues aside, you have to be an amazingly cruel and stupid jackass to think your girlfriend is obliged to let you gently caress her UTI.
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Mar 10, 2017 01:10
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Moridin920 posted:a man who won't eat pussy is a shameful man imo There should be a dating service that hooks up people who absolutely won't do oral
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Mar 10, 2017 01:12
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Mirthless posted:There should be a dating service that hooks up people who absolutely won't do oral OKStupid
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Mar 10, 2017 02:02
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Lone Goat posted:That's not what "goes dark" means, you dummy I was talking about a black man from Africa "inevitably" being a deadbeat dad. Absent all other relevant information that assumption seems pretty drat racist to me. Hopefully you were just making a joke but sometimes it's hard to tell around here
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Mar 10, 2017 02:06
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Khorne posted:Smart people, like all people, are often wrong. In fact, to be smart you have to realize when you are wrong or potentially not right. Realizing when you're wrong or out of your depth and keeping that in mind, accounting for it and using that to temper your decisions is generally referred to as wisdom. Often people who know a lot of poo poo and can do complex things and are very intelligent haven't a single drop of wisdom. "The ancient Oracle said that I was the wisest of all the Greeks. It is because I alone, of all the Greeks, know that I know nothing." Sow-crates
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Mar 10, 2017 02:07
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Pick posted:it shorted my furby I was throwing my furby around because let's be honest furbys are loving dumb and it shorted out and started squealing all of this gibberish, eyes and mouth gesticulating like it was having a seizure. It was kind of scary. Then I skinned it and made a cute little hat for my dog. Ah, childhood
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Mar 10, 2017 02:16
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ArbitraryC posted:It's 3 A.M. I love you.
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Mar 10, 2017 02:21
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I cannot believe you goddamn retards: THE SISTER AND HER BOYFRIEND ARE UNEMPLOYED AND HAVE BEEN FOR YEARS THEY LIVE OFF HER PARENTS THE BOYFRIEND HASN'T EVEN PROPOSED AND JUST SAID "WHOAH CAN'T GET IN THE COUNTRY AS A STUDENT, HOLD ON A BIT TOTES WORKING ON THAT" THE BOYFRIEND DIDN'T APPLY FOR WORK, JUST SCHOOL THAT SOMEONE ELSE WOULD BE PAYING FOR THEY ARE BRINGING A GODDAMN BABY THERE'S NO GUARANTEE THE BOYFRIEND GETS IN THE COUNTRY OR EVEN WANTS TO
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Mar 10, 2017 02:25
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Pvt.Scott posted:Realizing when you're wrong or out of your depth and keeping that in mind, accounting for it and using that to temper your decisions is generally referred to as wisdom. Often people who know a lot of poo poo and can do complex things and are very intelligent haven't a single drop of wisdom. Yeah, in everything besides like math and science there isn't necessarily a simple answer. All the bad boyfriends in the world calling things "illogical" have trouble understanding that you can't simplify most things in life down to a provable theorem. After a young adulthood with a lot of lying, evasion, and avoidance I've made a real effort to not say anything that I don't know is completely true, to not make promises I'm not positive I can keep, and to basically sprinkle qualifiers everywhere. Even my long-term girlfriend I can't promise her something like "we'll be together forever", the most I can say is "it's going well right now and I don't see that changing." It might not be quite as romantic but at least it's honest; I can't stand people throwing around absolutes. The most honest way to answer a question is usually "I don't know, but this is what I think:" Of course it's different on the internet, I can lie to you useless fuckers ALL I WANT 
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Mar 10, 2017 02:26
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Gumbel2Gumbel posted:I cannot believe you goddamn retards: I think about half of these things are straight up wrong or just assumptions. In any case it was fun to have one with so little consensus but we should probably move on
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Mar 10, 2017 02:28
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Play posted:I think about half of these things are straight up wrong or just assumptions. In any case it was fun to have one with so little consensus but we should probably move on Spiders, kangaroos and venomous platypuses will probably kill everyone involved anyway.
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Mar 10, 2017 02:32
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I[23F] just found out my boyfriend[24M] poops in urinals for fun.
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Mar 10, 2017 02:37
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Smirking_Serpent posted:I[23F] just found out my boyfriend[24M] poops in urinals for fun. You know, some things would be less weird if they were just a sexual fetish. I can totally buy someone getting off of urinal-pooping, but who could enjoy this platonically?
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Mar 10, 2017 02:46
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Smirking_Serpent posted:I[23F] just found out my boyfriend[24M] poops in urinals for fun. How short are these guys poops or does he got off on seeing people walk in on him, stare confused for a second, and slowly back out?
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Mar 10, 2017 02:46
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