Phoenix Command: The Commandering

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Let's Play! > Phoenix Command: The Commandering

Phi230: Feb 2, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

Popete posted:

So did we allocate buying rounds for the mortar or should we each buy 1 a piece?

Also I've been practicing my 2x4 swing.

Prices include enough ammo to not worry for a long while

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:14

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 18:30

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

Phi230 posted:

In the mean time, on this holy day of THORS DAY there shall be a THUNDERDOME

I posted it before, but Grimace and his bum leg are sitting out the Thunderdome. I'll relinquish whatever command role we're fighting for to prevent further injury.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:21

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

Zaodai posted:

I posted it before, but Grimace and his bum leg are sitting out the Thunderdome. I'll relinquish whatever command role we're fighting for to prevent further injury.

*snickering from rest of the mercs*

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:23

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

Alright, you've convinced me to joint he thunderdome. I'll forgoe the 2x4, and instead bring the 1911 we have sitting in the tupperware container. Whoever can take a shot to the knee without crapping themselves gets to be leader.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:25

Phi230: Feb 2, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

We'll have to make a new bracket as noted coward Grimace backs out

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:24

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

Phi230 posted:

We'll have to make a new bracket as noted coward Grimace backs out

Realtalk: I backed out before the bracket was made.

Also, Grimace is the only person to get wounded in service of this Clown Fiesta. I don't think the guy too weak to manage to put an M60 on the ground gets to snicker. :v:

[EDIT] Alternatively: You're the cowards, having to fight a one legged man in an rear end-kicking contest.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:27

Phi230: Feb 2, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

Zaodai posted:

Realtalk: I backed out before the bracket was made.

Also, Grimace is the only person to get wounded in service of this Clown Fiesta. I don't think the guy too weak to manage to put an M60 on the ground gets to snicker.

140,000 emotional damage inflicted on popete

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:28

Telsa Cola: Aug 19, 2011; No... this is all wrong... this whole operation has just gone completely sidewaysface

Its okay Grimace, If i win I will make you my second who can quickly fix all my bumbling mistakes.

Or not, who knows how this will turn out.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:34

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

Excuse but those bipods are really slippery, I'd like to see you try attach one well slowly sauntering into position.

Don't blame us for getting yourself shot by a computer janitor :smug:

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:38

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

PIAT, I need to requisition one of those frags.

Also, can someone point me to the direction of Popete's bunk? I need to... leave him a message.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:41

Popete: Oct 6, 2009; This will make sure you don't suggest to the KDz
That he should grow greens instead of crushing on MCs; Grimey Drawer

I've updated the bracket to remove Grimace who will instead be delegated to serving lemonades to the thirsty gladiators.

just messing with you Zaodai

http://challonge.com/tournaments/bracket_generator?ref=EPIUFm3BgQ

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:42

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

Popete posted:

just messing with you Zaodai

It's all in good fun.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:48

Yvonmukluk: Oct 10, 2012; Everything is Sinister

Phi230 posted:

This is the Company's Table of Equipment as of now:

We don't own anything not on this list, until you purchase more guns, equipment, etc...

What about the looted AKs? Having some stuff that loads up Soviet ammo might be a good backup plan in case or long-term field ops where resupply might be problematic, especially since AKs are likely to be ubiquitous in a lot of potential operation zones. Then again, I suppose in those cases you can just swipe the enemy's gun, rather than just the ammo...

Although I'm sure there are better choices available, of course.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 21:49

Rockopolis: Dec 21, 2012; I MAKE FUN OF QUEER STORYGAMES BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH MY LIFE THAN MAKE OTHER PEOPLE CRY

I can't understand these kinds of games, and not getting it bugs me almost as much as me being weird

The M16 is a decent enough gun, and it's one you already have a pile of. Maybe spend the money on the accessories rather than new guns? There were some suppressors and laser sights that'd go nicely with what you've got.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 22:25

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Rockopolis posted:

The M16 is a decent enough gun, and it's one you already have a pile of. Maybe spend the money on the accessories rather than new guns? There were some suppressors and laser sights that'd go nicely with what you've got.

Depending on how realistic this game is, it's got a few issues for general purpose use:

* Long and awkward to use indoors or from a vehicle.

* Has less raw power at long range than a .30 caliber battle rifle.

Seeing as how we're likely going into an AO that involves long distance fighting (Africa) in addition to the building clearing we've already done, it may be prudent to buy specialty weapons like carbines and 7.62x51mm rifles so we can better tailor our loadouts to the environment.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 22:41

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

And shotguns. The only reason people didn't use them much is because they're sort of technically a warcrime. You want to put a man down in a hurry? You hit him with a 12 gauge.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 22:44

Gnoman: Feb 12, 2014; Come, all you fair and tender maids
Who flourish in your pri-ime
Beware, take care, keep your garden fair
Let Gnoman steal your thy-y-me
Le-et Gnoman steal your thyme

Zaodai posted:

And shotguns. The only reason people didn't use them much is because they're sort of technically a warcrime. You want to put a man down in a hurry? You hit him with a 12 gauge.

Shotguns are fully legal for military use under all international treaties, so long as you don't use hollowpoint slugs. On what insane basis do you think they are "technically a warcrime".

# ? Apr 20, 2017 22:53

Telsa Cola: Aug 19, 2011; No... this is all wrong... this whole operation has just gone completely sidewaysface

The Germans wanted to make it one in WW1 because the pellets made infection super likely and made surgery a bitch to do. But that didn't pass and thats the only example I can think of.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 22:56

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Germany in WW1 tried to have them declared illegal for the wounds they caused, but it was never accepted. In part because Germany was complaining while simultaneously using flamethrowers and gas.

E:fb

# ? Apr 20, 2017 22:57

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

^^^^
Yeah, and they really didn't like them in WW1 either. Good ol' trench brooms.

Gnoman posted:

Shotguns are fully legal for military use under all international treaties, so long as you don't use hollowpoint slugs. On what insane basis do you think they are "technically a warcrime".

We stopped using them in WW2 (despite being brutally effective) because the Germans filed complains about them being inhumane. Which stopped basically everyone except the Australians, who eventually had to be forced out of it by the higher ups in the UK. Which is why I said "sort of technically".

Up until ballistic plates became popular, shotguns with proper ammo were still pretty effective against body armor. Copper core slugs would punch through most kevlar vests, and even if they didn't they were still going to incapacitate the target enough to move in for a follow up shot.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 22:57

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

We've used shotguns in every war since the American Revolution. Even today, we issue the Benelli M4 as the M1014.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 22:59

Gnoman: Feb 12, 2014; Come, all you fair and tender maids
Who flourish in your pri-ime
Beware, take care, keep your garden fair
Let Gnoman steal your thy-y-me
Le-et Gnoman steal your thyme

Zaodai posted:

^^^^
Yeah, and they really didn't like them in WW1 either. Good ol' trench brooms.

We stopped using them in WW2 (despite being brutally effective) because the Germans filed complains about them being inhumane. Which stopped basically everyone except the Australians, who eventually had to be forced out of it by the higher ups in the UK. Which is why I said "sort of technically".

Researching the incident (which happened in WWI, not WWII), the complaint was rejected out of hand and use continued. Britain and France elected not to use shotguns at that time because the one they had available was not suitable for field use.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:00

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

I meant stopped using in the conflict. Or at least on paper. Not like they could go and tell every individual soldier to stop using his shotgun.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:01

Telsa Cola: Aug 19, 2011; No... this is all wrong... this whole operation has just gone completely sidewaysface

chitoryu12 posted:

Germany in WW1 tried to have them declared illegal for the wounds they caused, but it was never accepted. In part because Germany was complaining while simultaneously using flamethrowers and gas.

E:fb

To be fair everyone was using flamethrowers and gas at that point I believe. It was just the Americans who were using trench guns. I don't think all of the parties would have accepted dropping the use of gas and flamethrowers but having one party drop the use of one weapon wouldn't be too much of a stretch.

Telsa Cola fucked around with this message at 23:06 on Apr 20, 2017

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:04

Gnoman: Feb 12, 2014; Come, all you fair and tender maids
Who flourish in your pri-ime
Beware, take care, keep your garden fair
Let Gnoman steal your thy-y-me
Le-et Gnoman steal your thyme

Zaodai posted:

I meant stopped using in the conflict. Or at least on paper. Not like they could go and tell every individual soldier to stop using his shotgun.

They did NOT stop using the shotgun. At all. They flatly refused to do so, telling the Germans that the weapon was perfectly legal, and if Germany carried out their threats to mistreat American troops captured using shotguns then retaliation against German prisoners would take place.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:05

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

Historic spergery aside - My point was we should buy shotguns.

The autism apparently backs my play regardless. All in favor, fire wildly into the air.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:07

Dandywalken: Feb 11, 2014

Lmfao those whacky Krauts

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:19

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Telsa Cola posted:

To be fair everyone was using flamethrowers and gas at that point I believe. It was just the Americans who were using trench guns. I don't think all of the parties would have accepted dropping the use of gas and flamethrowers but having one party drop the use of one weapon wouldn't be too much of a stretch.

The problem was that if Germany successfully got shotguns declared war crimes, the Entente would be free to do the same with all the bullshit Germany pulled. Since they threatened to start executing POWs captured with shotguns, the Americans would basically be free to execute any German soldiers who did something vaguely war crimey.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:48

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Either way, I think carbines would be better for close combat than shotguns. They're plenty powerful in close quarters, but they struggle with penetrating armor that a rifle would churn like butter. They also tend to have low capacity and most have tube magazines so they're slow to reload as well.

My suggestion? AKS-74U.

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:52

Zaodai: May 23, 2009; Death before dishonor?
Your terms are accepted.

chitoryu12 posted:

Either way, I think carbines would be better for close combat than shotguns. They're plenty powerful in close quarters, but they struggle with penetrating armor that a rifle would churn like butter. They also tend to have low capacity and most have tube magazines so they're slow to reload as well.

My suggestion? AKS-74U.

We could use 1 for blowing open doors if we had to. And game hunting if we run low on supplies! :pseudo:

# ? Apr 20, 2017 23:57

Strrrrront: Feb 7, 2011

Don't forget to buy some grandfather clocks!

# ? Apr 21, 2017 00:55

xthetenth: Dec 30, 2012; Mario wasn't sure if this Jeb guy was a good influence on Yoshi.

I'll just throw all my money back in the pool if I can get my hands on that hella sweet M2HB. If not I'll probably snag some marksman-y rifle.

# ? Apr 21, 2017 00:57

George Rouncewell: Jul 20, 2007; You think that's illegal? Heh, watch this.

What we needs is a good supply of Kalashnikovs with proper ammo. 7.62 or 5.45, no matter.

After all, when you absolutely, positively need to kill every motherfucker in the room...

# ? Apr 21, 2017 01:13

simplefish: Mar 28, 2011; So long, and thanks for all the ~~fish~~ gallbladdΣrs!

Coupla things:

1) I want to buy all the headsets out of my stipend
2) If there's some sort of advanced medkit that Bogdan forgot to list, I'd like to buy that too
3) I want to buy all the grenades possible with whatever I have left after 1 and 2
3b) also all the armour if there's anything left after that

4) I'm sticking with my M-16, it does the job just fine plus I want the M203 so I need to keep it
5) speaking of under-barrel stuff, all those wanting shotguns should consider under-barrel shotguns, like the Ciener Ultimate Over/Under, KAC Masterkey, or the M29. They aren't on Bogdan's list right now but maybe we could ask him to get some if some weapon cards are written. That way we get to keep our rifles too

5) communal pool of guns is fine, I think if you were the one who listed something to be bought, the rest of us should give that person first dibs. It does make things easier just to say we all get 12k then nobody overspends and we can all get what we want in our stores in a fair way.

6) Phi could you clarify what you meant by Bogdan's cousin being $50k if we bought the range? I'll add quotes in here in a min
E:

simplefish posted:

Where does it say that?
I'm reading it as:
CIA instructor 200k
Range with Macedonian instructor 125k

And while anybody we hire and anything we build may well have upkeep costs attached to them, I haven't seen it said what they will be, or if there will be any at all, but if Bogdan's cousin is cheap to hire, I imagine he'll be cheap to keep. After all, gonna want to keep us sweet and buying guns from the family.

Zaodai posted:

He's $75,000 to hire, then $50,000 to have him be a range instructor. So it's $125,000 for him, PLUS the $75k for the range.

simplefish posted:

That doesn't make sense to me. I mean, if he's our one and only Training Dude and good at guns, he'd train us on guns with or without a range. Why would we have to pay again to have him do his job of training us on guns, just because we bought the range? It makes more sense to me to read it as "if you package buy him and the range you save $25k"

Zaodai posted:

I guess we'll need a clarification from Phi. I mean if he's only 50k and we can have 2 training guys maybe it's worth it.

7) As stated before, I will not be taking part in Thunderdome. I have no desire to be the leader, we didn't buy the EOD so I guess it's just sticks and skin and I don't want to catch a permanent injury, and you're all going to need someone to path you up after (although I guess we do have a hospital now with nurses sexier than me)

simplefish fucked around with this message at 01:31 on Apr 21, 2017

# ? Apr 21, 2017 01:25

Phi230: Feb 2, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

" A good ol' thunderdome huh? This takes me back...."

WELCOME TO THE FIRST ANNUAL HIRED GOONS THUNDERDOME!

12 Hired Goons enter, 12 Hired Goons leave. Two get promoted!

Rules of the DOME:

1. First to get knocked over LOSES

2. First to get knocked out LOSES

No killing, and no touching of the hair. Weapons will be selected at random from a garbage can. LETS BEGIN!

ROUND 1 - FIGHT 1 - POTATO V. DWAYNE "THE DWAYNE" DWAYNE

FIGHTERS

PRE-FIGHT ANALYSIS

Special Guest John Madden posted:

Well yah see, uh, the best way to play thunderdome is uh hit the other gladiator more than they hit you. Some hits is better than, uh, none hits.

Thank you John, now, the key to the bloodsport of Thunderdome is in the reflexes as Commander Snake would say. You gotta be fast, and you gotta be quick. Potato has chosen a stick as his weapon of choice, while Dwayne has chosen a 2x4. Very comparable weapons here, it's gonna be a good fight I say.

FIGHT!

Impulse 2

The gladiators move toward eachother cautiously...

Impulse 3/4

Potato cautiously advances, and Dwayne makes a lightning fast strike!

code:


Dwayne Short Strike Slashes Potato!

Potato Parries!

Attack Level  3. Parry Column 9. Defensive Skill Level 3. 

 22% chance to hit - Rolls 36 - Potato Parries Successfully!

The strike is parried skillfully by Potato's stick. Potato responds with a short strike of his own while Dwayne is reeling from his failed strike!

code:


Potato Short Strike Slashes Dwayne!

Dwayne has NO CA left, cannot recover, cannot parry!

Attack Level 3. Parry Column 2. Defensive Skill Level 3. 

Automatic Hit! Dwayne is slashed by Potato!

Potato Damage Bonus = 3. 
Short Strike = .5 Damage.
 Damage Roll = 1d10 +5.
 Rolled 5. 
(5+5) x 3 x .5 = 15 Impact Damage (Blunt). 

10 + 3 (Dwayne Skill Level) = 13. 15 > 13. Dwayne slightly dazed, -1AC next Impulse. 

Dwayne Struck in Left Shin! Disabled!
100 PD Inflicted. 
Healing Time = 51 days.
92% Chance of Recovery After 25 Days (Field Hospital)

Dwayne FAILS Knockout Roll (Rolled 35, Needed 98) 
Incapacitated for 58 seconds

Potato's expert riposte strikes Dwayne in the shin and breaks the shinbone! Dwayne promptly passes out for about a minute and is stretchered off to the brand new Field Hospital. Glad you guys bought that huh? Gonna make those Doctors work for their money.

Potato Awarded 2 Hand-to-Hand XP.
Dwayne "The Dwayne" Dwayne Awarded 1 Hand-to-Hand XP.

Congratulations to our Eighth Seeded Gladiator, Potato, on his big win tonight. He advances to face Spanky in Round 2.

Next fight is Popete v. Actuary!

Phi230 fucked around with this message at 01:56 on Apr 21, 2017

# ? Apr 21, 2017 01:46

Phi230: Feb 2, 2016; by Fluffdaddy

simplefish posted:

7) As stated before, I will not be taking part in Thunderdome. I have no desire to be the leader, we didn't buy the EOD so I guess it's just sticks and skin and I don't want to catch a permanent injury, and you're all going to need someone to path you up after (although I guess we do have a hospital now with nurses sexier than me)

YOUR FATE HAS ALREADY BEEN DECIDED

# ? Apr 21, 2017 01:46

simplefish: Mar 28, 2011; So long, and thanks for all the ~~fish~~ gallbladdΣrs!

Phi230 posted:

YOUR FATE HAS ALREADY BEEN DECIDED

No, really though, I don't want to

# ? Apr 21, 2017 01:49

Telsa Cola: Aug 19, 2011; No... this is all wrong... this whole operation has just gone completely sidewaysface

Watch him be the champion.

# ? Apr 21, 2017 01:50

Anta: Mar 5, 2007; What a nice day for a gassing

LMAO the whole force except one is going to be out of action for a month.

I imagine our Chinese staff just going :wtc:

# ? Apr 21, 2017 01:52

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# ? Apr 27, 2024 18:30

Quinntan: Sep 11, 2013

Sorry about your shins

# ? Apr 21, 2017 01:54

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