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Waterslide Industry Lobbyist
Jun 18, 2003

ANYONE WANT SOME BARBECUE?

Lipstick Apathy

Toshimo posted:

I don't see beer.

I used 2 cans of Hite

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Toshimo
Aug 23, 2012

He's outta line...

But he's right!

Good, but go darker, imo. Something malty and rich for flavor.

Waterslide Industry Lobbyist
Jun 18, 2003

ANYONE WANT SOME BARBECUE?

Lipstick Apathy

Toshimo posted:

Good, but go darker, imo. Something malty and rich for flavor.

The brewery hosting the cookoff made a chile stout, I used it for a test batch but it came out not great.

Waterslide Industry Lobbyist fucked around with this message at 06:01 on Apr 23, 2017

coyo7e
Aug 23, 2007

by zen death robot

Ranter posted:

Can you go into more detail on this? Can you provide a specific brand? An actual Mexican supermarket chain in California sells the stuff you say is poo poo, but also carries like 10 brands, so knowing some brands you think are good would be really useful.

Why is a bakery selling meat products?
I dunno about bakeries, but I assumed he was referring to the stuff made by the butcher at your local latin grocer. There are two near me, one I have gone to for decades, and one which smells so bad I only buy canned stuff or bagged spices there.

I really am not a fan of pastries and mexican pastries are especially not my thing, so I avoid them like the plague

bewbies
Sep 23, 2003

Fun Shoe
So here's a chili challenge.

I'm in the process of moving a couple states away and nearly all of my cooking gear and spice collection including all of my fancy wonderful chili powders are boxed up. I'm alone in my new house for a couple of weeks. I have a small skillet, a medium size pot (with lid) and a grossly overpowered six burner pro gas stove.

What are the bare minimum ingredients necessary to make a decent batch of chili? I'm thinking something like:

Chuck roast and chorizo
Onion
few fresh peppers
Gebharts
Cayenne
Cumin
Oregano

Ben Nevis
Jan 20, 2011

bewbies posted:

So here's a chili challenge.

I'm in the process of moving a couple states away and nearly all of my cooking gear and spice collection including all of my fancy wonderful chili powders are boxed up. I'm alone in my new house for a couple of weeks. I have a small skillet, a medium size pot (with lid) and a grossly overpowered six burner pro gas stove.

What are the bare minimum ingredients necessary to make a decent batch of chili? I'm thinking something like:

Chuck roast and chorizo
Onion
few fresh peppers
Gebharts
Cayenne
Cumin
Oregano

If stripping it to the bare minimum, I wouldn't call Chorizo necessary.

bewbies
Sep 23, 2003

Fun Shoe
The grocery store here has really good uncased chorizo and I figured that'd be an easy/cheap way to get more flavor without having to use lots of spices.

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts
Since you're hitting up the grocery store, throw in a can of chipotles in adobo

Elizabethan Error
May 18, 2006

bewbies posted:

The grocery store here has really good uncased chorizo and I figured that'd be an easy/cheap way to get more flavor without having to use lots of spices.
A cheap and easy way to get more flavor is not overcooking the poo poo out of your chili meat this time

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts
Can Goulash talk go in this thread or no

bewbies
Sep 23, 2003

Fun Shoe

Elizabethan Error posted:

A cheap and easy way to get more flavor is not overcooking the poo poo out of your chili meat this time

I don't follow....

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts

bewbies posted:

I don't follow....

Don't use tri tip like last time

Bob Morales
Aug 18, 2006


Just wear the fucking mask, Bob

I don't care how many people I probably infected with COVID-19 while refusing to wear a mask, my comfort is far more important than the health and safety of everyone around me!

bewbies posted:

The grocery store here has really good uncased chorizo and I figured that'd be an easy/cheap way to get more flavor without having to use lots of spices.

I tried chorizo last time I made chili, I didn't feel like it really added anything.

xiansi
Jan 26, 2012

im judjing all goons cause they have bad leader, so a noral member is associated whith thoose crasy one

Personaly i would quit the goons if i was in cause of thoose crasy ppl
Clapping Larry

Ranter posted:

Can Goulash talk go in this thread or no

Sure, why not, it's slow-cooked beef in a spicy sauce - close enough!

Was skiing in Austria earlier this year, had rindsgulasch (along with dumplings you would kill for) in a lovely little restaurant, and it was amazing. Eastern Europe tends to be quite heat-averse with food, and even 'hot' paprika really isn't, but it's a great flavour, and comes in lots of different varieties, just like chilli. The one thing they all have in common when powdered is not lasting long - use that stuff fresh, otherwise it'll be stale & weak.

As ever, Serious Eats has got you covered for a great starting point, and like with most stews you can dick about with ingredients and not mess up too badly.

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts
That seriouseats recipe doesn't really do it for me. It's a good jumping off point, but I'm thinking it needs:

Way more onion
More vinegar
Caraway seed (toasted, ground not whole)
No fish sauce, add MSG instead

My housemates picked this up for me in Budapest and so I'll do a little effort post when I use it:



Hooplah
Jul 15, 2006


I made a vegan chili with tempeh last night. I'm really happy with how it turned out. It's a hard to cook chili for a vegetarian girlfriend who can't handle even jalapeno-level spiciness, but I feel like I succeeded. It was also the first time I've made chili completely without tomatoes. The lack of acidity was kind of strange and alarming to my Minnesotan palate when I was cooking it, but once the flavors finished melding I approve. Does traditional Texan chili have any acidity to it?

I'll throw my spur-of-the-moment ingredients list down here for critique:

saute in oil first:
1 yellow onion
4 cloves garlic
2 poblanos

after onions go translucent add:
12 oz or so? of tempeh
2 carrots
2 small-ish yellow potatoes

deglaze with a splash or two of bourbon

add paste consisting of 4 dried anchos, 6 dried guajillos, rehydrated and blended in the rehydration water
add spices
add a couple cups soaked, cooked cranberry beans
add about half of a fat tire, drank the rest
a few splashes of tamari, for some extra umami

spice mix, not really measured:
1 tbsp toasted cumin
pinch cinnamon
1 tsp coriander
2 tsp smoked paprika
pinch cracked black pepper
pinches thyme, oregano

I also added enough water to fully cover the beans, which was a cup or less. The rehydrated peppers added a significant amount of liquid, so I didn't even bother opening a thing of stock/bouillon as I had been planning on doing. I should have just added more beer instead but I drank it and wasn't sure if adding too much would impart weird flavors.

I started this on the stovetop, but did most of the cooking in the oven at 300F. Only cooked for like 3-4 hours because I started way too late.
money shot:



It's probably too beany for the purists, but I couldn't have my meat so I needed lots of other protein, dammit

Elizabethan Error
May 18, 2006

Hooplah posted:

I made a vegan chili with tempeh last night. I'm really happy with how it turned out. It's a hard to cook chili for a vegetarian girlfriend who can't handle even jalapeno-level spiciness, but I feel like I succeeded. It was also the first time I've made chili completely without tomatoes. The lack of acidity was kind of strange and alarming to my Minnesotan palate when I was cooking it, but once the flavors finished melding I approve. Does traditional Texan chili have any acidity to it?

I'll throw my spur-of-the-moment ingredients list down here for critique:

saute in oil first:
1 yellow onion
4 cloves garlic
2 poblanos

after onions go translucent add:
12 oz or so? of tempeh
2 carrots
2 small-ish yellow potatoes

deglaze with a splash or two of bourbon

add paste consisting of 4 dried anchos, 6 dried guajillos, rehydrated and blended in the rehydration water
add spices
add a couple cups soaked, cooked cranberry beans
add about half of a fat tire, drank the rest
a few splashes of tamari, for some extra umami

spice mix, not really measured:
1 tbsp toasted cumin
pinch cinnamon
1 tsp coriander
2 tsp smoked paprika
pinch cracked black pepper
pinches thyme, oregano

I also added enough water to fully cover the beans, which was a cup or less. The rehydrated peppers added a significant amount of liquid, so I didn't even bother opening a thing of stock/bouillon as I had been planning on doing. I should have just added more beer instead but I drank it and wasn't sure if adding too much would impart weird flavors.

I started this on the stovetop, but did most of the cooking in the oven at 300F. Only cooked for like 3-4 hours because I started way too late.
money shot:



It's probably too beany for the purists, but I couldn't have my meat so I needed lots of other protein, dammit
looks pretty good(not that I've cooked tempeh before). some things I can see: add the spices to the oil with the onion so they bloom, and don't add the garlic so early, you won't taste it.
also coriander and cumin are the same plant fyi, so watch that unless you like cumin VV Doh

Elizabethan Error fucked around with this message at 23:12 on May 22, 2017

SymmetryrtemmyS
Jul 13, 2013

I got super tired of seeing your avatar throwing those fuckin' glasses around in the astrology thread so I fixed it to a .jpg

Elizabethan Error posted:

looks pretty good(not that I've cooked tempeh before). some things I can see: add the spices to the oil with the onion so they bloom, and don't add the garlic so early, you won't taste it.
also coriander and cumin are the same plant fyi, so watch that unless you like cumin

Coriander and cumin are totally different plants. I think you're thinking of coriander and cilantro, which are different parts of the same plant.

iospace
Jan 19, 2038


Do coriander and cilantro cause the same reaction in certain people?

Asking for a friend.

Hooplah
Jul 15, 2006


iospace posted:

Do coriander and cilantro cause the same reaction in certain people?

Asking for a friend.

No, coriander tastes completely different. I wouldn't even recognize them as the same plant if I didn't already know.

Elizabethan Error posted:

looks pretty good(not that I've cooked tempeh before). some things I can see: add the spices to the oil with the onion so they bloom, and don't add the garlic so early, you won't taste it.
also coriander and cumin are the same plant fyi, so watch that unless you like cumin VV Doh

Yeah, thanks. Those were kind of oversights, as I chopped the veg to saute at the same time and threw them all in the same holding bowl without realizing what I'd done. And I forgot to prep the spices before starting the saute. When should I add garlic? I typically add it halfway through the onion saute.

Also, is there such thing as adding too much beer, outside of making it too watery?

Tezcatlipoca
Sep 18, 2009
Use lime juice for acidity. It can help ease some of the spiciness too (gently caress people who don't want to sweat while eating chili.)

Hooplah
Jul 15, 2006


Ah! I knew I forgot something!

Tezcatlipoca
Sep 18, 2009

Hooplah posted:

No, coriander tastes completely different. I wouldn't even recognize them as the same plant if I didn't already know.


Yeah, thanks. Those were kind of oversights, as I chopped the veg to saute at the same time and threw them all in the same holding bowl without realizing what I'd done. And I forgot to prep the spices before starting the saute. When should I add garlic? I typically add it halfway through the onion saute.

Also, is there such thing as adding too much beer, outside of making it too watery?

He's talking about the ~1/8th of people who taste something completely different than the rest of us when they eat cilantro. I've heard it described as an overwhelming soapy taste. I have no idea if the seeds do the same thing, I doubt it though.

Edit: Too much beer can make your food bitter and lime juice can help with that too.

I just roast a head of garlic and add it in after the water/stock. If you're sautéing it though it usually only needs a minute or two at medium heat after you add the spices.

Tezcatlipoca fucked around with this message at 23:50 on May 22, 2017

Upsidads
Jan 11, 2007
Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates


1/3 cashews
1/3rd dehydrated beans:black,garbanzo, whatever
1/6th cheap rear end sala (i try just about all kinds)
1/6th fake meats(tempeh, tofu, fake ground beef

Add habanero powder:to taste
Add some other chili powder seasonings
1 baby can of that Adobo sauce
1 soy chorizo (or not)

Start with slow cooking overnight dehydrated beans on low, add a few inches of water over them. Caution adding too little water is bad adding too much is kinda impossible.
You can add the cashews too, why not now?

Go to bed

Next morning add garbanzo beans from a can because I think I dreamt that dehydrated garbanzo beans are real.

Stir it up. Add seasonings cover whole mess with fake meats an cover entire thing like it's a lasagna with like 1 cm of salsa (your fav cheap salsa, don't use sala you hate but keep it simple)

Did you remember to pick up that soy chorizo from trader joes? toss that in now.

Add that baby can of chipotle with adobo sauce on top and don't stir it in
Make sure there is enough water in that it's like a cm from the top.

Put it on for like another ten hours on low and open a window your house smells like chili take a nap with a window open.

After a few naps stir up the chili around the chipotle adobo on top and open some more windows your eyes are starting to burn (sometimes I use some ground up ghost peppers now)

Take a cocktail fork and fish the chipotle on top out of the chili because jesus christ eating those make my friends gently caress up a toilet like a litter box. Leave as much of the sauce in as possible though that's good stuff.

20 hours later you should notice the whole pot is turning a few shades darker and the cashews are soft.

Take a half a cup of dark roast coffee and toss it in add like a few tablespoons of agave to taste and you are done!

Its pretty dang good hot, its amazing the next day cold, right out of the refrigerator

I call it Insufferable Vegetarian Chili, It might be vegan I don't know I'm not a doctor

EDIT SPELLING

Upsidads fucked around with this message at 06:09 on May 23, 2017

coyo7e
Aug 23, 2007

by zen death robot
Yeah you can buy dried chickpeas, check in the bulk section of your local market.

Also, you misspelled vegetarian. ;)

Upsidads
Jan 11, 2007
Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates


coyo7e posted:

Yeah you can buy dried chickpeas, check in the bulk section of your local market.

Also, you misspelled vegetarian. ;)

Gonna look for them. Aldis failed again!

von Braun
Oct 30, 2009


Broder Daniel Forever
Try using jackfruit in chili for chewiness.

Suspect Bucket
Jan 15, 2012

SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR
In not-meat chat, has anyone tried that grilled watermelon thing the internet's been on about?

Upsidads
Jan 11, 2007
Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates


Suspect Bucket posted:

In not-meat chat, has anyone tried that grilled watermelon thing the internet's been on about?

wha?

Submarine Sandpaper
May 27, 2007


people are finding out when you brown things it tastes like your browned something.

Suspect Bucket
Jan 15, 2012

SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR

http://www.liveeatlearn.com/pan-seared-watermelon-steak/

Elizabethan Error
May 18, 2006

Junkie Disease posted:

1/3 cashews
1/3rd dehydrated beans:black,garbanzo, whatever
1/6th cheap rear end sala (i try just about all kinds)
1/6th fake meats(tempeh, tofu, fake ground beef

Add habanero powder:to taste
Add some other chili powder seasonings
1 baby can of that Adobo sauce
1 soy chorizo (or not)

Start with slow cooking overnight dehydrated beans on low, add a few inches of water over them. Caution adding too little water is bad adding too much is kinda impossible.
You can add the cashews too, why not now?

Go to bed

Next morning add garbanzo beans from a can because I think I dreamt that dehydrated garbanzo beans are real.

Stir it up. Add seasonings cover whole mess with fake meats an cover entire thing like it's a lasagna with like 1 cm of salsa (your fav cheap salsa, don't use sala you hate but keep it simple)

Did you remember to pick up that soy chorizo from trader joes? toss that in now.

Add that baby can of chipotle with adobo sauce on top and don't stir it in
Make sure there is enough water in that it's like a cm from the top.

Put it on for like another ten hours on low and open a window your house smells like chili take a nap with a window open.

After a few naps stir up the chili around the chipotle adobo on top and open some more windows your eyes are starting to burn (sometimes I use some ground up ghost peppers now)

Take a cocktail fork and fish the chipotle on top out of the chili because jesus christ eating those make my friends gently caress up a toilet like a litter box. Leave as much of the sauce in as possible though that's good stuff.

20 hours later you should notice the whole pot is turning a few shades darker and the cashews are soft.

Take a half a cup of dark roast coffee and toss it in add like a few tablespoons of agave to taste and you are done!

Its pretty dang good hot, its amazing the next day cold, right out of the refrigerator

I call it Insufferable Vegetarian Chili, It might be vegan I don't know I'm not a doctor

EDIT SPELLING
congrats, you've created Salsa Fake-Chicken.
:barf:

Upsidads
Jan 11, 2007
Now and then we had a hope that if we lived and were good, God would permit us to be pirates


Elizabethan Error posted:

congrats, you've created Salsa Fake-Chicken.
:barf:

Its got Chili Beans my Polish grandma called it Chili and its Chili

spider wisdom
Nov 4, 2011

og data bandit
Long-time lurker, first time poster itt. Here's what I just put together in no particular order

2.5lbs stew beef
Tube of pork chorizo
Ancho, arbol and guajillo, powderized
White & yellow onion
Chicken stock
Something like 8 garlic cloves, can't get enough
Cumin, oregano and toasted coriander seed
A roma tomato on the verge of bad
Half a can tomato paste
Most a can of chipotle peppers & adobo
Not even a tsp of honey
Half pinch cinnamon
Can of Lobo Negro
Surprise can kidney beans because gently caress you I like them in my chili

I haven't made chili in so long. I forgot how incredible dried chiles smell, god. Might add pics once it starts coming together.

e: good but kinda one-note. Maybe a day in the fridge will help.

spider wisdom fucked around with this message at 13:24 on May 28, 2017

Bald Stalin
Jul 11, 2004

Our posts
Maybe add some MSG or fish sauce to elevate it. Otherwise sounds really good.

Missing Name
Jan 5, 2013


I made "gently caress, I need meals for the week" chili with poo poo I had around the house.

1 lb of ground beef I found in the freezer, browned
3 jalapenos, charred over the gas burner
2 onions
3 tomatoes that needed to go
3 cloves of garlic
A fuckton of cumin
Dash of cinnamon
Pepper
Handful each of cayenne and paprika
Half a can of Yuengling Black and Tan
Enough beef stock to cover everything (also the main salt source)
Some fresh cilantro I forgot I had

Stew for two hours, throw in take out containers with brown basmati rice, throw in freezer for easy lunches at work. Except the one still hot container I ran out the door with.

This is truly the worst chili I have ever eaten. Except for the really cheap canned stuff.

coyo7e
Aug 23, 2007

by zen death robot

quote:

this looks as good as it tastes.

quote:

And finally the edible flowers. LOOK AT THEM. I mean, they’re optional, but this dish is fancy as haaayyl, so why wouldn’t you throw in some edible flowers?

Suspect Bucket
Jan 15, 2012

SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR

Do you have something AGAINST pretty things? Because I'll happily eat all the adorable stuff you don't want. Watermelon chili served with a bouquet of alliums and borage. Then I'll have some ginger and hibiscus flower pink lemonade with my little pony friends.

inspire
Nov 24, 2004
Eyyy!

Hooplah posted:

No, coriander tastes completely different. I wouldn't even recognize them as the same plant if I didn't already know.
Are you talking about seeds vs leaves?

I don't enjoy the leaves but fuckin love coriander seeds.

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Hooplah
Jul 15, 2006


Yeah.

I don't think the seeds contain the chemicals some people find gross that are found in the leaves. I think both are excellent, but for different reasons.

Also I'm sure that grilled watermelon tastes just like it looks

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