Star Citizen: Death of a Space Thread?

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > Star Citizen: Death of a Space Thread?

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

Wrecked Angle posted:

One of the things that is consistently amazing to me about Star Citizen and CIG is how they seem to be massively incompetent at just about everything and yet somehow also running a whale-milking operation almost to perfection.

It really does make me wonder sometimes who or what is really behind all this.

Everything is just soooo spot on to exactly what you would do if you wanted to extract maximum ongoing funds from backers it's uncanny! The 'limited' ship sales, the CCU and 'ship melting' systems, the grey market, the subscriber system, evocati and concierge, the list goes on.

Then you've got the delays, but sometimes they almost seem like scripted delays, they wait and wait and wait and then just as things start to get to a tipping point there's something produced which is just enough to satisfy the uprising.

Again with the ship sales ask yourself this, are they desperately hawking everything for a quick buck or could you see that actually all these sales are being 'expertly' managed to generate a certain amount of revenue? We all know that if they wanted a few million quid overnight they could put "Banu Alienship 2.0" on concept sale without even showing any design and they'd rake it in, so why don't they? Someone there has some marketing savvy and we know it's not Crobbler himself.

It's just remarkable how we all assume that all the evidence points to CIG being completely incompetent when actually we're missing the point. CIG are completely incompetent at making a computer game, but they're massively shrewd and accomplished at making nerds part with their cash.

I've noticed this before too, friend.

I know Sandi claims it all, but there's somebody or multiple somebodies helping them along in the shadows. We'll probably never know who they are and that's how they operate. It's probably some people at Turbulent, but I have no idea who is setting it up.

And then again it could just be dumb luck; but I'm not sure. Stuff like Road to Citizencon or whatever seems to imply that somebody knows what's about to happen is going to be bad, and there needs to be some kind of "save our rear end" plan in reserve depending on how bad it is.

Star Citizen's biggest problem of all the problems it has is the fact that it's release is bad for business. :shrug:

There's no incentive for SC to release. There's never even been the talk of plans of how they could possibly support a multinational group of companies once it releases. All signs point to CIG going under a few months after SC release just due to potential server costs and no income besides game sales and maybe people paying for a subscription.

The instant players get the ability to use the in game economy to buy ships, CIG is done for.

Similarly, the instant CIG even begins to explain how much it costs for ship X to be purchased for in game money, even before it's possible, they'll have a PR shitstorm on their hands. It doesn't matter how much the ship will cost in game, people will be pissed.

# ? Jul 21, 2017 23:45

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# ? May 6, 2024 03:43

Mirificus: Oct 29, 2004; Kings need not raise their voices to be heard

TheGremlich on Pluto

Wikipedia on Pluto

# ? Jul 21, 2017 23:47

MinorInconvenience: Feb 24, 2017; Criminal lawyer or criminal, lawyer. Yeah. No difference.

Wrecked Angle posted:

Actually, I can totally see them doing that. In fact, I would probably go one further and say I could see them releasing a 3.0 which not only doesn't have space to planet transitions but also has 'moons' where you can't explore the full surface of the sphere.

I can almost hear Chris's voice saying it now...

'We've uh, still got some blockers on the uh, procedural planetary tech which we're uh,still trying to get ironed out but I don't want to keep the backers waiting any longer so we've uh, decided to give you some landing zones to explore, *rapturous applause* j-ju-just as a taste while we're smashing these bugs that allow us to deliver the full planets. So uh, have fun in these zones for now and we'll release the full planets in a month or so.'

Of course the full planets never come.

Maybe. But then that reveals the "lie" of working seamless transitions shown in the "live-play" video last year, right? I think that would lose them a lot of remaining goodwill. Hurt sales. Yada, yada.

# ? Jul 21, 2017 23:48

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

Bofast posted:

It's ice. You just happened to suffer a bad hit

Oh man.

# ? Jul 21, 2017 23:48

Crazypoops: Jul 17, 2017

Hav posted:

You know, this CCU stuff could get them into trouble. They're loving around with other people's money here.

In any other industry I would say yes, they are going to burn, but the gaming industry gets away with so much poo poo it astounds me.

Fraud, Illegal Gambling, Misappropriation. I mean gently caress, pick out any F2P game and you could probably find 4-5 felonies just in the god drat advertisement!

How the gently caress every other industry gets regulated the poo poo out of, but the gaming industry which brought in $91 billion dollars last year gets a loving shrug and a pass.

This whole loving thing with Crobbles shows that the gaming industry absolutely requires government intervention and regulation. What's happening with CIG is incredibly destructive and will have dire ramifications down the road for anyone involved in the industry.

I mean, they already dismantled Crytek. I can only imagine the havoc Crapples has caused to the industry over there. These things don't exist on a island separate from the world. It has a wake that spreads through everything it touches.

What if some shitflam man came in and hosed around with ID back in the day, the way shitberts is with Amazon and Cry, where would the industry be now?

Crazypoops fucked around with this message at 00:07 on Jul 22, 2017

# ? Jul 21, 2017 23:52

trucutru: Jul 9, 2003; by Fluffdaddy

Wrecked Angle posted:

One of the things that is consistently amazing to me about Star Citizen and CIG is how they seem to be massively incompetent at just about everything and yet somehow also running a whale-milking operation almost to perfection.

It really does make me wonder sometimes who or what is really behind all this.

Everything is just soooo spot on to exactly what you would do if you wanted to extract maximum ongoing funds from backers it's uncanny! The 'limited' ship sales, the CCU and 'ship melting' systems, the grey market, the subscriber system, evocati and concierge, the list goes on.

Then you've got the delays, but sometimes they almost seem like scripted delays, they wait and wait and wait and then just as things start to get to a tipping point there's something produced which is just enough to satisfy the uprising.

Again with the ship sales ask yourself this, are they desperately hawking everything for a quick buck or could you see that actually all these sales are being 'expertly' managed to generate a certain amount of revenue? We all know that if they wanted a few million quid overnight they could put "Banu Alienship 2.0" on concept sale without even showing any design and they'd rake it in, so why don't they? Someone there has some marketing savvy and we know it's not Crobbler himself.

It's just remarkable how we all assume that all the evidence points to CIG being completely incompetent when actually we're missing the point. CIG are completely incompetent at making a computer game, but they're massively shrewd and accomplished at making nerds part with their cash.

To be honest, to me it seems like they just got lucky and the whales auto-selected themselves. Every single publicity stunt or money-making idea but ship-related stuff is ridiculously incompetent. If they were actually any good at extracting money (and not just lucky to have been at the correct place and time) then you wouldn't have complete disasters like their appearances at citizencon or gamescon.

It's not CIG, it's the loving idiots that convinced themselves that CR is the messiah. It's similar to our favorite comparison: a cult. You may think that the leader must have super-human charisma but they are usually complete (creepy) hacks that somehow attracted the critical mass of fools required for spontaneous ignition and have been riding high from them on.

# ? Jul 21, 2017 23:52

D_Smart: May 11, 2010; by FactsAreUseless; College Slice

trucutru posted:

Well. I find that AI amazing. Imagine, it has to control each muscle individually on each leg and arm to climb those stairs and interact with the ship controls.

loving morons. That's a pre-determined path spline that the NPC is following. Like every game with NPCs has stuff like this.

Jesus H. Christ, how dumb are these chucklefucks?

xXAdmiralBekHarXx posted:

Almost all tasks delayed 2 weeks. Release date doesnt budge lol

It's almost as if it's all bogus.

https://twitter.com/dsmart/status/888529328396546048

# ? Jul 21, 2017 23:57

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

Crazypoops posted:

(Interestingly here, the "accomplices" are also the marks, as the shills for CIG are duped themselves).

Now this will be the interesting part that we'll probably never know.

We learned about Oasis and that Wolf guy purely by accident, and he runs an internet marketing firm which uses public forums and twitter and such to create interest for a paying customer.

Even bad press creates interest, and even our MoMA does enough to stir the pot and keep people talking.

No doubt even this thread has caused people to buy in just to "experience" the train wreck themselves and be a bigger part of it. Peter Gabriel probably spurred people into buying in with his funny videos, if just so people think they too could make funny videos like his and become YouTube famous.

I bet this thread, even with the attention on refunds, creates more revenue for CIG than it hampers.

Now I could always be wrong about it, but it's just my opinion.

Though do bear in mind that even with revenue being generated, that still may not be a sufficient amount of revenue to keep the doors open. So things could still close down, especially since there is so much negative press these days.

But even then, the Roberts' and friends are already all millionaires. So does it even matter anymore?

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:03

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

Crazypoops posted:

What if some shitflam man came in and hosed around with ID back in the day, the way shitberts is with Amazon and Cry, where would the industry be now?

Probably since it is viewed as "entertainment" like Hollywood and its accounting methods.

And while $155 million is a lot of money, it's not A LOT of money compared to other disasters such as Theranos, Madoff, etc.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:12

Rudager: Apr 29, 2008

MinorInconvenience posted:

Maybe. But then that reveals the "lie" of working seamless transitions shown in the "live-play" video last year, right? I think that would lose them a lot of remaining goodwill. Hurt sales. Yada, yada.

I dunno, that's some pretty simple mental gymnastics by Citizens standards.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:13

D_Smart: May 11, 2010; by FactsAreUseless; College Slice

Here we go again. It's like 2015 all over again

"First man on the moon: hands-on with Star Citizen Alpha 3.0"

Of course, once again, information like this is behind a media paywall instead of being shown to backers who gave them $155M to date.

At least they confirmed "seamless transition from space to planet". now we wait to see if that's what they deliver or

D_Smart fucked around with this message at 00:27 on Jul 22, 2017

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:16

Crazypoops: Jul 17, 2017

D_Smart posted:

Here we go again. It's like 2015 all over again

"First man on the moon: hands-on with Star Citizen Alpha 3.0"

Of course, once again, information like this is behind a media paywall instead of being shown to backers who gave them $155M to date.

*not pictured: game

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:22

thatguy: Feb 5, 2003

D_Smart posted:

Here we go again. It's like 2015 all over again

"First man on the moon: hands-on with Star Citizen Alpha 3.0"

Of course, once again, information like this is behind a media paywall instead of being shown to backers who gave them $155M to date.

I like how the next article is "Star Citizen's 3.0 alpha scheduled for June 29 release".

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:22

Wrecked Angle: May 12, 2012; "JURASSIC PARK!"

Rudager posted:

I dunno, that's some pretty simple mental gymnastics by Citizens standards.

Exactly! It's so easy to sell this poo poo to the faithful. They just come up with something loosely related planets and call it a blocker...

[Chris] Unfortunately the Physicalised Atmospherics system is causing us some headaches right now...

[Backers] See you stupid goon. Space to Planet is done, Procedural planets are done, we're just waiting on 'Physicalised Atmospherics' to be done and then we'll get the whole lot released in one go. I expect we'll see it before the end of the year.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:24

JugbandDude: Jul 19, 2016; Remember when you were young, you shone like the sun

Shine on you crazy diamond!

Colostomy Bag posted:

https://www.diffchecker.com/au6DOJ98

https://robertsspaceindustries.com/schedule-report

Two weeks.

I called it :smug:

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:26

thatguy: Feb 5, 2003

PC Gamer posted:

they're adding locks to ship doors

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:27

Tippis: Mar 21, 2008; It's yet another day in the wasteland.

thatguy posted:

PC Gamer posted:
they're adding locks to ship doors

Ooh. If they keep this up, they will eventually have as many spaceship features as FTL.

�but still nowhere near as nice-looking graphics.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:33

peter gabriel: Nov 8, 2011; Hello Commandos

thatguy posted:

Hopefully they disable no clip as well, or :lol:

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:35

Theotus: Nov 8, 2014

Alright, Commandos! Listen up!

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Squad development will begin as soon as the customization milestone is met after Level 1, with priority being given to our Concierge Chat Participants. Don't miss your opportunity to provide us with your input!

So fall in and let's Goon our way to victory.

:xcom:

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:36

Sarsapariller: Aug 14, 2015; Occasional vampire queen

D_Smart posted:

Here we go again. It's like 2015 all over again

"First man on the moon: hands-on with Star Citizen Alpha 3.0"

"I landed on a moon in a build of the upcoming 3.0 update, and did not get any footage of it. Here's a sizzle reel!"

What a shame! Better buy another spaceship.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:40

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

I just love this whole fiasco.

1) No delta patcher
2) One player model
3) Might get a lock on your chariot
4) Constant delays
5) 6 years, $155 million. PROFIT

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:46

Crazy_BlackParrot: Feb 1, 2016; Christ Roberts is way better than toilet lord...

Colostomy Bag posted:

I just love this whole fiasco.

1) No delta patcher
2) One player model
3) Might get a lock on your chariot
4) Constant delays
5) 6 years, $155 million. PROFIT

lmao, actually I had forgotten this. they still have no females ingame.
Well that's game development for ya.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:48

Dementropy: Aug 23, 2010

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:52

MinorInconvenience: Feb 24, 2017; Criminal lawyer or criminal, lawyer. Yeah. No difference.

D_Smart posted:

Here we go again. It's like 2015 all over again

"First man on the moon: hands-on with Star Citizen Alpha 3.0"

Of course, once again, information like this is behind a media paywall instead of being shown to backers who gave them $155M to date.

At least they confirmed "seamless transition from space to planet". now we wait to see if that's what they deliver or

Yeah. A "seamless transition from space to planet" only after a "quantum jump." I wonder what happens if after the quantum jump you try to fly back up into orbit around the planet instead of descending.... Hidden load screens, baby.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:55

Percelus: Sep 9, 2012; My command, your wish is

that pcgamer article was making it seem like being able to land your autism chariot on a barren rock seamlessly is something impressive

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:57

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

Crazy_BlackParrot posted:

lmao, actually I had forgotten this. they still have no females ingame.
Well that's game development for ya.

I've always thought they could roll out the females anytime...but literally are afraid of what would happen when you have 20 minutes of gameplay and 100 Sextillion Km to explore combined with shall we say are an odd bunch.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 00:58

Crazy_BlackParrot: Feb 1, 2016; Christ Roberts is way better than toilet lord...

MinorInconvenience posted:

Yeah. A "seamless transition from space to planet" only after a "quantum jump." I wonder what happens if after the quantum jump you try to fly back up into orbit around the planet instead of descending.... Hidden load screens, baby.

if done right not so bad.
Like the bucket drop move from Battlestar Galactica
http://www.geekinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/bucket-drop.gif

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:00

Xaerael: Aug 25, 2010; Marching Powder is objectively the worst poster known. He also needs to learn how a keyboard works.

Currently in Meridian's X-Com....

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:03

Percelus: Sep 9, 2012; My command, your wish is

i bet 3.0 fixes none of the existing bugs and adds lots of new ones but backers and the gamer press will sing praises for croberts finally having a moon in his broken techdemo. imagine how apeshit they'll go if croberts figures out how to add a second solar system or add all the planets and moons to the existing one

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:04

AbstractNapper: Jun 5, 2011; I can help

Percelus posted:

that pcgamer article was making it seem like being able to land your autism chariot on a barren rock seamlessly is something impressive

Hmm, PC Gamer has quite a history of articles (so, so many for a pre-alpha game still in development). One seemed maybe critical, but it actually concluded that "yes, SC is fun!".
Probably means nothing at all.

AbstractNapper fucked around with this message at 01:08 on Jul 22, 2017

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:05

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

D_Smart posted:

Here we go again. It's like 2015 all over again

"First man on the moon: hands-on with Star Citizen Alpha 3.0"

Of course, once again, information like this is behind a media paywall instead of being shown to backers who gave them $155M to date.

At least they confirmed "seamless transition from space to planet". now we wait to see if that's what they deliver or

I'm looking forward to seeing it.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:07

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

Colostomy Bag posted:

I like how they renamed "armor" to "armour", and the website shows it changed in one place but "armor" still exists three other places.

That'd be a British tax relief word right there, friend! :homebrew:

Edit: British cat artwork taken from the poster with Big Ben. Copyright by CIG do not distribute.

The Titanic fucked around with this message at 01:23 on Jul 22, 2017

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:09

Combat Theory: Jul 16, 2017

e: taxe

Combat Theory fucked around with this message at 01:17 on Jul 22, 2017

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:11

MinorInconvenience: Feb 24, 2017; Criminal lawyer or criminal, lawyer. Yeah. No difference.

Crazy_BlackParrot posted:

if done right not so bad.
Like the bucket drop move from Battlestar Galactica
http://www.geekinsider.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/bucket-drop.gif

I'm not knocking load screens, mind you. I think Elite Dangerous does it is pretty drat cool and I've never felt "not immersed" when landing on a moon. Just calling out the standard Croberts' bullshit.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:18

ewe2: Jul 1, 2009

Hav posted:

Of course it's the latter.

Enron was working on things right up and past the point where their leadership was sentenced to jail. Individuals themselves were as much victims of the leadership as the loving customers. Cymelion is fond of strawmen.

- http://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2007/01/08/open-secrets-3

OK minor history rant:

That article took a lot of words to explain that using circumstantial evidence and mass detail to prove a theory isn't as effective as primary evidence. For example, the British didn't just do "better guesswork", they had primary evidence leaked to them which they used to correlate actual photography and deduce that even if they didn't have the specifics of how they worked, the Germans were successfully testing rockets. The V1 was easier to spot because of the ramps, but the V2 intelligence success was even greater. They knew the testing site, they picked up radio transmissions during V2 tests and even diagrams of the facility drawn for them by spies.

That didn't stop some caremad scientists/bureaucrats who felt they'd been left out of the hunt to make wild claims about the rockets that would have made them unworkable just to win a point and discredit the scientists who made the discovery. If they had succeeded in their petty bureaucratic battle, it's likely we would never have heard of the British V1/V2 rocket coups because the ensuing disaster of unpreparedness would have ensured that the files would be lost in a "mysterious" fire.

Star Citizen however is different: the "mystery" is a tactic, the detail a smokescreen, and the primary evidence is as clear as it ever was with DNF years before the end. It may not fly so well in a court of law, but the court of public opinion will be in no such doubt.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:19

Dementropy: Aug 23, 2010

D_Smart posted:

Here we go again. It's like 2015 all over again

"First man on the moon: hands-on with Star Citizen Alpha 3.0"

Of course, once again, information like this is behind a media paywall instead of being shown to backers who gave them $155M to date.

At least they confirmed "seamless transition from space to planet". now we wait to see if that's what they deliver or

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:21

Dial A For Awesome: May 23, 2009

Star Citizen: Goons Opposing Roberts' Farce

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:25

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

Sarsapariller posted:

"I landed on a moon in a build of the upcoming 3.0 update, and did not get any footage of it. Here's a sizzle reel!"

What a shame! Better buy another spaceship.

I think this is good! PCGamer going on record as saying a feature exists and is actually playable.

So I have some questions for you smart boys and girls:

Why is CIG stealing photographs of real places and photoshopping their artwork into it instead of just taking screenshots right out of their engine for these things? Like the car recently.

Why have there been no leakers talking about planetary landings being in right now and playable?

You could say the PCGamer guy is lying but that doesn't seem to make sense? Also you could say he's playing some magical build the rest of the world will never see but that also makes no sense because now there is real people saying they did These Things People Want. If CIG were to not have actual seamless landings that would make everybody look stupid.

So what's the deal now?

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:30

D_Smart: May 11, 2010; by FactsAreUseless; College Slice

Dementropy posted:

It's cute that he thinks me, an investor, is actually getting paid; instead of me having put in quite a bit of my own money into Alganon since 2010. Moron.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:36

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# ? May 6, 2024 03:43

Raskolnikov: Nov 25, 2003

TheAgent posted:

I've been up all night creating an entire neighborhood for the roberts and smart roomie experiment. traits and looks were assigned randomly to thread crew peeps

I've got:
Chris Roberts, Sandi, Erin Roberts
Ben and Alexis Lesnick
Brian Chambers
Derek Smart
WTFOSaurus

then:
me

then:
the titanic and raslovinikov

then:
the mod squad (beer and beet)

then:
the thread crew 1 (hav, XK, AP, meridian, pgabz, tijuana bib, colostomy bag, zen)

still putting the finishing touches on lazrin, moma, and other thread regulars

just thought I'd update y'all that about something I thought was significant:

Bless you.

# ? Jul 22, 2017 01:40

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