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SlothfulCobra
Mar 27, 2011

He actually screwed up and got gizzard instead of liver.

Very different organ.

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frankenfreak
Feb 16, 2007

I SCORED 85% ON A QUIZ ABOUT MONDAY NIGHT RAW AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS LOUSY TEXT

#bastionboogerbrigade
Yeah, I imagine that doesn't go nearly as well with onions as liver does.

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


I just had to Google that, my grandma used to make delicious tomato soup with chicken gizzards.
Absolutely different way of cooking from livers obviously.

Vorkosigan
Mar 28, 2012


e;f;b

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


I fuckin hate gizzards. There are good organs to eat, stop serving the one that's like chewing on rocks and tastes bad. Plate of chicken hearts instead please.

NachtSieger
Apr 10, 2013


Gizzards own hard, they're fun as hell to eat and flavorful.

Samizdata
May 14, 2007

Grand Fromage posted:

I fuckin hate gizzards. There are good organs to eat, stop serving the one that's like chewing on rocks and tastes bad. Plate of chicken hearts instead please.

When my grandma (RIP) would make fried chicken, she would do the neck, gizzards, and hearts to give me to stop bugging her about when it would be done. My dad (also RIP) had dibs on livers.

Rockopolis
Dec 21, 2012

I MAKE FUN OF QUEER STORYGAMES BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO WITH MY LIFE THAN MAKE OTHER PEOPLE CRY

I can't understand these kinds of games, and not getting it bugs me almost as much as me being weird
My grandmother made some pretty amazing chicken gizzards by marinating them in soy sauce.
Chicken feet, on the other hand, only she seemed to like those.

By popular demand
Jul 17, 2007

IT *BZZT* WASP ME--
IT WASP ME ALL *BZZT* ALONG!


Gizzards in soy sauce sounds good enough that I'm totally gonna gizz!

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

Next time, tell 'em fake crabmeat is not only yummy but also super-healthy: http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20180126-the-100-most-nutritious-foods

angerbot
Mar 23, 2004

plob

quote:

12. CELERY FLAKES (v)

319kcal, $6.10, per 100g

Celery that is dried and flaked to use as a condiment. An important source of vitamins, minerals and amino acids.

NUTRITIONAL SCORE: 68

11. DRIED PARSLEY (v)

292kcal, $12.46, per 100g

Parsley that is dried and ground to use as a spice. High in boron, fluoride and calcium for healthy bones and teeth.

Health, but at what cost?

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

angerbeet posted:

Health, but at what cost?

Actually now that you mention it how is celery so unnutritious that you burn more calories eating it than you get out of it, but celery flakes make it onto this list?

I wanna accuse the Illuminati of something

Randaconda
Jul 3, 2014

by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Grand Fromage posted:

I fuckin hate gizzards. There are good organs to eat, stop serving the one that's like chewing on rocks and tastes bad. Plate of chicken hearts instead please.

:wrong:

JacquelineDempsey
Aug 6, 2008

Women's Circuit Bender Union Local 34



angerbeet posted:

Health, but at what cost?

I was kinda amused/saddened by all the entries for fish that came with notes like "This stuff's rich in nutrients and omegas! Oh, but not if you're pregnant. Also, eels have toxins in their skin mucus."

On a weird side-note: I'm currently taking a class to get FDA certified as a canned goods processor. "Canned" means anything that gets processed and hermetically sealed, so that includes cans, jars, pouches, aseptic boxes, etc. Anything shelf stable in your pantry, really.

Anyways, I was a bit taken aback to learn that in the US, we only got government regulation on that sort of thing as late as 1971. So that means any MRE (any canned food, really) made before then had absolutely no govt oversight on the processing. I know we think of MREs as being nigh-indestructible, no-expiration forces of foodstuffs, but that poo poo could've been bad the day it went into the pouch. Just be safe if anyone dares to try some vintage stuff like some of those Youtubers, m'kay? :ohdear:

On a more relevant-to-the-thread note: I also learned that the greatx-grandfather of canning was Nicolas Appert, who was tasked by Napoleon to come up with a way to get food to the front without it spoiling. He was the first dude to come up with "hmm, maybe I should boil it in jars, then cork it really quick". Later, Pasteur got on the right track, then Underwood (of the deviled ham company by the same name) figured out shelf stability in 1895. But today, the highest award given to folks in the canning industry is the Appert Award.

Suspect Bucket
Jan 15, 2012

SHRIMPDOR WAS A MAN
I mean, HE WAS A SHRIMP MAN
er, maybe also A DRAGON
or possibly
A MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
BUT HE WAS STILL
SHRIMPDOR

JacquelineDempsey posted:


Anyways, I was a bit taken aback to learn that in the US, we only got government regulation on that sort of thing as late as 1971. So that means any MRE (any canned food, really) made before then had absolutely no govt oversight on the processing. I know we think of MREs as being nigh-indestructible, no-expiration forces of foodstuffs, but that poo poo could've been bad the day it went into the pouch. Just be safe if anyone dares to try some vintage stuff like some of those Youtubers, m'kay? :ohdear:


Steve1989 once opened a tinned meat that grew noticeable mold over the course of the video, it was amazing.

Trauma Dog 3000
Aug 30, 2017

by SA Support Robot

Suspect Bucket posted:

Steve1989 once opened a tinned meat that grew noticeable mold over the course of the video, it was amazing.

link

JacquelineDempsey
Aug 6, 2008

Women's Circuit Bender Union Local 34



Suspect Bucket posted:

Steve1989 once opened a tinned meat that grew noticeable mold over the course of the video, it was amazing.

:aaaaa: :stare: [what's the barfing smilie?]

Mold won't kill you (and of course is key in making many cheeses and sausages), but molds eat acids, and acids are what keeps C. botulinum from becoming botulism.

Which can kill you:



Mom didn't can her peas right, served them up at a dinner party, and wiped out nearly the whole family. :(

If you open any product and it already has mold in it, for the love of god throw that poo poo out.

fishmech
Jul 16, 2006

by VideoGames
Salad Prong

Nebakenezzer posted:

Actually now that you mention it how is celery so unnutritious that you burn more calories eating it than you get out of it, but celery flakes make it onto this list?

It isn't. A typical medium celery stalk has just 6 calories in the thing, but you would burn 1 calorie or less in eating and digesting it. On top of that when you make it into flakes, you're really trimming and throwing out a lot of the undigestible fiber bulk and the water content. That listed 100 gram portion of celery flakes is a) a pretty huge amount of tiny diced matter to eat at once and b) being made out of several kilos of raw celery.

The "celery is basically negative calories" thing is just something that was thought up by people selling diet books, so they could list something with a very small amount of calories, and then oversell it a bit.

Reiterpallasch
Nov 3, 2010



Fun Shoe
Old-timey metal rolling technology being what it was, the cans that Appert supplied to the Grand Armee had to be opened with a hammer and chisel, and the process was apparently something of a hazard to soldiers new to mess duty.

Tunicate
May 15, 2012

fishmech posted:

It isn't. A typical medium celery stalk has just 6 calories in the thing, but you would burn 1 calorie or less in eating and digesting it. On top of that when you make it into flakes, you're really trimming and throwing out a lot of the undigestible fiber bulk and the water content. That listed 100 gram portion of celery flakes is a) a pretty huge amount of tiny diced matter to eat at once and b) being made out of several kilos of raw celery.

The "celery is basically negative calories" thing is just something that was thought up by people selling diet books, so they could list something with a very small amount of calories, and then oversell it a bit.

Hmm... medium celery stalk is about 20 grams? Heat of fusion for water is 80 cal/g, 37 cal/g to move from frozen to body temperature...

You can burn a full 2 kCal just by freezing your celery before you eat it! That cuts the calories by a third! #lifehacks

JacquelineDempsey
Aug 6, 2008

Women's Circuit Bender Union Local 34



Reiterpallasch posted:

Old-timey metal rolling technology being what it was, the cans that Appert supplied to the Grand Armee had to be opened with a hammer and chisel, and the process was apparently something of a hazard to soldiers new to mess duty.

Really? Not calling you out or anything, just that the gist I got from our brief history overview was that Appert was sticking corks in glass bottles, tin/aluminum cans as we know 'em weren't in the picture for a ways yet.

Gnoman
Feb 12, 2014

Come, all you fair and tender maids
Who flourish in your pri-ime
Beware, take care, keep your garden fair
Let Gnoman steal your thy-y-me
Le-et Gnoman steal your thyme




JacquelineDempsey posted:

Really? Not calling you out or anything, just that the gist I got from our brief history overview was that Appert was sticking corks in glass bottles, tin/aluminum cans as we know 'em weren't in the picture for a ways yet.

You're correct, Appert was using bottles to preserve things. Canning in tin was invented in England the year after he started doing so, and canned rations for the Royal Navy began in 1813.

Loomer
Dec 19, 2007

A Very Special Hell
Yeah, Appert wasn't involved with tin cans at all. He was a glass man. He actually made a point of avoiding tin because French tin at the time was, uh, well. poo poo, frankly. It probably would have killed everyone who ate his food if he'd used it. It was the english who figured out the tin can component a couple of years later.

fishmech
Jul 16, 2006

by VideoGames
Salad Prong
Which person was it who finally figured out a way to reliably solder on the lids in a way that would stand up to shipping and handling in rough conditions, but also didn't have the big risk of lead and other nasties leaching into the food and ruining it?

Reiterpallasch
Nov 3, 2010



Fun Shoe
Huh. Coulda sworn that tidbit was in Swords Around a Throne but I just text searched it and nothing. That'll learn me, I suppose.

SlothfulCobra
Mar 27, 2011

Nebakenezzer posted:

Next time, tell 'em fake crabmeat is not only yummy but also super-healthy: http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20180126-the-100-most-nutritious-foods

If fake crabmeat is so good, it should just sell itself as whatever it is instead of pretending it's crab.

I don't want my lunch to be a house of lies.

Grand Fromage
Jan 30, 2006

L-l-look at you bar-bartender, a-a pa-pathetic creature of meat and bone, un-underestimating my l-l-liver's ability to metab-meTABolize t-toxins. How can you p-poison a perfect, immortal alcohOLIC?


Some of the good fake crab from Japan is pretty much indistinguishable from the real thing. The cheap stuff is lovely tho.

It's made from real fish, pollock usually, so it's still seafood.

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

So this isn’t actually military food. However, it’s interesting to note that Poland has produced a commercial canned meat product that heavily resembles the worst Eastern European military rations and has overt military branding.









I made it edible with plenty of minced onions, Creole seasoning, and chipotle hot sauce.

FrankZP
Nov 11, 2015

AIGHT SHITBIRDS, IT'S EXPLOSION TIME!
I'm afraid to imagine what the private's pork loaf looks like.

ContinuityNewTimes
Dec 30, 2010

Я выдуман напрочь

FrankZP posted:

I'm afraid to imagine what the private's pork loaf looks like.

Less appetising than the muzzle of your AK.

Darkest Auer
Dec 30, 2006

They're silly

Ramrod XTreme

FrankZP posted:

I'm afraid to imagine what the private's pork loaf looks like.

It's a potato

Nebakenezzer
Sep 13, 2005

The Mote in God's Eye

SlothfulCobra posted:

If fake crabmeat is so good, it should just sell itself as whatever it is instead of pretending it's crab.

I don't want my lunch to be a house of lies.

Check out this dinner of lies

DaStampede
Feb 8, 2018

Darkest Auer posted:

It's a potato

That might be better than actual pork loaf

sleepy.eyes
Sep 14, 2007

Like a pig in a chute.
I dunno, it doesn't look so bad to me. I also like Spam and deviled ham and that crap, for what it's worth.

ContinuityNewTimes
Dec 30, 2010

Я выдуман напрочь
The mystery meat in polish rations is actually really nice.

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

DaStampede posted:

That might be better than actual pork loaf

Indeed.

Phanatic
Mar 13, 2007

Please don't forget that I am an extremely racist idiot who also has terrible opinions about the Culture series.

JacquelineDempsey posted:

I was kinda amused/saddened by all the entries for fish that came with notes like "This stuff's rich in nutrients and omegas! Oh, but not if you're pregnant. Also, eels have toxins in their skin mucus."

On a weird side-note: I'm currently taking a class to get FDA certified as a canned goods processor. "Canned" means anything that gets processed and hermetically sealed, so that includes cans, jars, pouches, aseptic boxes, etc. Anything shelf stable in your pantry, really.

Anyways, I was a bit taken aback to learn that in the US, we only got government regulation on that sort of thing as late as 1971.

Hrm?

McNary-Mapes Amendment's from the 1930s. There were plenty of regulations regarding canned food that predate 1971.

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc

JacquelineDempsey posted:

Really? Not calling you out or anything, just that the gist I got from our brief history overview was that Appert was sticking corks in glass bottles, tin/aluminum cans as we know 'em weren't in the picture for a ways yet.

It's almost entirely wrong hth

OXBALLS DOT COM
Sep 11, 2005

by FactsAreUseless
Young Orc

Phanatic posted:

Hrm?

McNary-Mapes Amendment's from the 1930s. There were plenty of regulations regarding canned food that predate 1971.

I assume it is some sort of deliberate misinformation troll

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Random Axis
Jul 19, 2005

Negrostrike posted:

I couldn't help but laugh my rear end off when he mixed water with the cassava flour.

Kind of late to this party, but as a serious question what should he have done with it? I don't think anyone handing me that ration to eat is expecting I have a pan to make cassava bread.

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