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Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE


Welcome to the opening match of the FIFA World Cup 2018. Our Russian hosts will play against fellow group A members Saudi Arabia



Kick off will be at 16:00 GMT.

Russia should be able to win against Saudi Arabia. The Saudis only won two world cup matches, both in the 1994 WC in the US. Russia has home team advantage, and refs are known to be kind to host nations in the group stages.

The Saudis only have an orb.



Still, our resident Russian and Russia expert, Alexeythegreat, is pessimistic about his team's performance. So perhaps we can have an exciting 1-0, where the ref gifts Russia an insane penalty in the 93rd minute.

At least Portugal will play Spain tomorrow, so we can expect to see at least one actually decent game.

Let's get this over with!

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Literally Lewis Hamilton
Feb 22, 2005



Lol if you think Russia are going to win, the Saudis are going to dick all over them

Gigi Galli
Sep 19, 2003

and then the car turned in to fire
Russia is definitely going to win, and it will be a 92nd minute VAR penalty (or penalties).

shut up blegum
Dec 17, 2008


--->Plastic Lawn<---
The Russians will win 1-1

oliwan
Jul 20, 2005

by Nyc_Tattoo
let's all hope for the sink hole

chaoslord
Jan 28, 2009

Nature Abhors A Vacuum


The ref crew for the opening game

Ref: Nestor Pitana (ARG)
AR1: Hernán Maidana (ARG)
AR2: Juan Pablo Bellati (ARG)
4th: Sandro Ricci (BRA)
RAR: Emerson de Carvalho (BRA)

VAR: Massimilano Irrati (ITA)
AVAR1: Mauro Vigliano (ARG)
AVAR2: Carlos Astroza (CHI)
AVAR3: Daniele Orsato (ITA)

Pitana and Ricci were the likely candidates to get this opening match and FIFA found a way to put them both on it. I'm a little surprised Pitana was preferred for the whistle, though. IMO he is CONMEBOL's #1 and throwing him on the opener could go sideways fast (Nishimura in 2014, anyone?), so I'm shocked he wasn't saved for a bigger game than this snoozefest. And then when you add in that Ricci has a lot more experience using VAR it seems like he would have been the easy pick. If anyone remembers the last world cup, Pitana had Russia/Korea, USA/Portugal, Honduras/Switzerland, and France/Germany.

There are four VAR officials. Here is the breakdown of how they are used:

VAR: In charge of everything. The only one who communicates with the referees on the field of play.
AVAR1: While VAR is doing a review, AVAR1 watches the live monitor in case anyone decides to be an idiot while play is stopped and/or is monitoring live play while VAR decides whether or not to stop it.
AVAR2: An AR, they are the offside expert in the group to assist with those decisions.
AVAR3: Hanging out in case something happens to one of the other three folks.

Bogan Krkic
Oct 31, 2010

Swedish style? No.
Yugoslavian style? Of course not.
It has to be Zlatan-style.

hello yes the world cup is about to begin

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
Saudi Arabia winning would be really funny so I hope that happens

Bogan Krkic
Oct 31, 2010

Swedish style? No.
Yugoslavian style? Of course not.
It has to be Zlatan-style.

i watched a couple of saudi arabia games in the qualifiers and i still couldnt name a single member of their name

Tortilla Maker
Dec 13, 2005
Un Desmadre A Toda Madre
Hope the opener is Diana Ross level bad.

blue footed boobie
Sep 14, 2012


UEFA SUPREMACY

Jose posted:

Saudi Arabia winning would be really funny so I hope that happens

Allahu akbar

Flayer
Sep 13, 2003

by Fluffdaddy
Buglord
This is probably going to be the only game the Russians win before they crash out in the group stages.

irlZaphod
Mar 26, 2004

Kiss the Joycon to Kiss Zelda

I hope Russia lose all their matches in an embarrassing fashion.

ChrisXP
Nov 25, 2004

"In football, time and space are the same thing."
Kick-off is at 15:00 GMT, OP
We aren't using GMT here in glorious Britannia, as we declare less than 50mm rain per day as 'Summer Time'

Lenin Riefenstahl
Sep 18, 2003

That's enough! Out of here, you tubs of beer!
Russia will win this poo poo game

HJB
Feb 16, 2011

:swoon: I can't get enough of are Dan :swoon:
Hype hype hype

Weaponized Cum
Aug 31, 2004


This post brought to you by the finest Miami cocaine money can buy ----->
HARAM

Omnikin
May 29, 2007

Press 'E' for Medic
This poo poo gon' be good

Bape Culture
Sep 13, 2006

Ouhhh you better believe I’m hype and also billing for this weak rear end match :twisted:

Torrannor
Apr 27, 2013

---FAGNER---
TEAM-MATE

ChrisXP posted:

Kick-off is at 15:00 GMT, OP
We aren't using GMT here in glorious Britannia, as we declare less than 50mm rain per day as 'Summer Time'

Oh, sorry for that mistake.

Anyway, it begins in roughly 75 minutes :)

Gigi Galli
Sep 19, 2003

and then the car turned in to fire
Sneaking beers at work to watch this horrible poo poo.

peanut-
Feb 17, 2004
Fun Shoe
I've got football fever and the only cure is GOALS

So I may be hosed for this match

Jose
Jul 24, 2007

Adrian Chiles is a broadcaster and writer
My train is delayed and I can't even sit with a beer and watch the march in case I miss it

Bape Culture
Sep 13, 2006

Jose posted:

My train is delayed and I can't even sit with a beer and watch the march in case I miss it

Watch it on your phone idiot

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
ill be sitting in a dentist chair dreaming about watching some poo poo cloggers kick each other in front of millions of screaming russians while this match is going on op

vyelkin
Jan 2, 2011
imo my dentist should make like a russian prison and put a tv in the room so patients can watch the world cup

Aphex-
Jan 29, 2006

Dinosaur Gum

Jose posted:

Saudi Arabia winning would be really funny so I hope that happens

inshallah

ass cobra
May 28, 2004

by Azathoth

Jose posted:

Saudi Arabia winning would be really funny so I hope that happens

:agreed: op

vivisectvnv
Aug 5, 2003
i am very hype OP, russia is mostly wastemen, but hopefully smolov/golovin/dzagoev have one moment of magic in them

Rockybar
Sep 3, 2008

All Hail Orb.

TyrantWD
Nov 6, 2010
Ignore my doomerism, I don't think better things are possible
We are only 5 minutes into the preshow and I’m already sick of Fox. They seem to have a shoestring production budget because that intro animation looked at least 15 years old.

mila kunis
Jun 10, 2011
this is going to be the all time worst opening match at a big tournament

Omnikin
May 29, 2007

Press 'E' for Medic
my coworker wants to celebrate losing a bunch of weight by-get this- going to a bar for lunch & drinks and I'm trying to find a way to make it wait until the game is over

EST time kinda sucks for this tournament

Omnikin fucked around with this message at 15:10 on Jun 14, 2018

Omnikin
May 29, 2007

Press 'E' for Medic

tekz posted:

this is going to be the all time worst opening match at a big tournament

counterpoint: South Africa v Mexico with the vuvuzelas

Gigi Galli
Sep 19, 2003

and then the car turned in to fire

TyrantWD posted:

We are only 5 minutes into the preshow and I’m already sick of Fox. They seem to have a shoestring production budget because that intro animation looked at least 15 years old.

After the US failed to qualify I imagine their budget got cut significantly. The run up to the tournament was not nearly as full of ads for it as last time. At this point they're probably hoping they recoup their losses.

Loving Africa Chaps
Dec 3, 2007


We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.

Omnikin posted:

counterpoint: South Africa v Mexico with the vuvuzelas

There was a sick goal in that match

Kurtofan
Feb 16, 2011

hon hon hon
oil vs gas

TheBigAristotle
Feb 8, 2007

I'm tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money.
I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.

Grimey Drawer
I took a few days off work so I could sit around watching the World Cup but I didn't realize I'd also have to listen to Alexei Lalas what have I done

ass cobra
May 28, 2004

by Azathoth

Kurtofan posted:

oil vs gas

shitaly isnt in this tournament op

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mila kunis
Jun 10, 2011

Omnikin posted:

counterpoint: South Africa v Mexico with the vuvuzelas

vuvuzelas are cool

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