2019-2023 Marine Thread: Maybe the 2017 Army thread with a new coat of paint

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Internet VFW > 2019-2023 Marine Thread: Maybe the 2017 Army thread with a new coat of paint

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Viva Miriya: Jan 9, 2007

Vahakyla posted:

Aight bois, wish me luck, I did BAR; fought to get cleared, poo poo's all done. I jump tomorrow morning to the dolomites. poo poo is gonna rock.

AIRBORNE

# ? Feb 20, 2019 22:06

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# ? May 2, 2024 09:22

Naked Bear: Apr 15, 2007; Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!

Vahakyla posted:

Aight bois, wish me luck, I did BAR; fought to get cleared, poo poo's all done. I jump tomorrow morning to the dolomites. poo poo is gonna rock.

# ? Feb 20, 2019 22:27

Flikken: Oct 23, 2009; 10,363 snaps and not a playoff win to show for it

Vahakyla posted:

Aight bois, wish me luck, I did BAR; fought to get cleared, poo poo's all done. I jump tomorrow morning to the dolomites. poo poo is gonna rock.

Didn't you have a severe back injury recently?

# ? Feb 21, 2019 03:58

Vahakyla: May 3, 2013

Yeah caused by the last jump but that was year and two months ago.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 04:53

Hekk: Oct 12, 2012; 'smeper fi

Vahakyla posted:

Yeah caused by the last jump but that was year and two months ago.

Good luck you dumb bastard.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 07:27

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

Vahakyla posted:

Yeah caused by the last jump but that was year and two months ago.

Semper Fi devil dog you do the best jump you can do and make Chesty proud.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 08:18

Viva Miriya: Jan 9, 2007

PenisMonkey posted:

Semper Fi devil dog you do the best jump you can do and make Chesty proud.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 10:45

Wasabi the J: Jan 23, 2008; MOM WAS RIGHT

PenisMonkey posted:

Semper Fi devil dog you do the best jump you can do and make Chesty proud.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 13:15

thetechnoloser: Feb 11, 2003; Say hello to post-apocalyptic fun!; Grimey Drawer

Penisgrinder posted:

Semper Fi devil dog you do the best jump you can do and make Chesty proud.

FRESH MEAT FOR THE GRINDER, EH KID?

# ? Feb 21, 2019 13:26

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

He did it and Chesty is indeed proud.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 14:46

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

Chesty Puller sounds like a porn name.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 14:53

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

Well the man did have the biggest dick ever to grace a life form.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 14:54

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

PenisMonkey posted:

Well the man did have the biggest dick ever to grace a life form.

12 inches if I remember the cadence right.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 15:02

Vahakyla: May 3, 2013

I have landed and retain full control of my bladder and bowels. Feels nice.

# ? Feb 21, 2019 15:24

TheFonz: Aug 3, 2002; <3

What the gently caress is this?

# ? Feb 21, 2019 15:28

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

Some army dude jumped out of a plane

# ? Feb 21, 2019 15:33

Viva Miriya: Jan 9, 2007

Vahakyla posted:

I have landed and retain full control of my bladder and bowels. Feels nice.

what are you, some kinda force recon dicksuck?

# ? Feb 21, 2019 18:34

Flikken: Oct 23, 2009; 10,363 snaps and not a playoff win to show for it

Viva Miriya posted:

what are you, some kinda force recon dicksuck?

Nah he's an army medic that is currently lost.

# ? Feb 22, 2019 16:21

Nostalgia4Butts: Jun 1, 2006; WHERE MY HOSE DRINKERS AT

Flikken posted:

Nah he's an army medic that is currently lost.

marines are like 40% of the national guard so im pulling a liz warren here

# ? Feb 22, 2019 16:25

Asbury: Mar 23, 2007; Can't post for 6 years!; Hair Elf

Turns out that crazy coast guard officer that wanted to literally kill everyone was prior service marines, lol

:thunk:

# ? Feb 22, 2019 16:31

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

Spirit of Charles Whitman lives on.

# ? Feb 22, 2019 16:50

PathAsc: Nov 15, 2011; Hail SS-18 Satan may he cleanse us with nuclear fire

PISS TAPE IS REAL

Chesty would be proud

# ? Feb 22, 2019 21:11

Viva Miriya: Jan 9, 2007

Flikken posted:

Nah he's an army medic that is currently lost.

No one tell him he's been reassigned then.

# ? Feb 22, 2019 23:18

J.A.B.C.: Jul 2, 2007; There's no need to rush to be an adult.

So, my grandfather just passed away. He had a stroke a few weeks ago, was recovering up until this morning, and then fainted. Blood pressure dropped, organs started failing, and he slipped into a coma. He passed about an hour ago.

Had to head back into the office to sign some hand receipts, 1SG and Commander see me, ask me if I'm alright. Tell me I'm still going to JRTC, which I expected. 1SG then says that when he first heard me talk about this, he thought it was some sort of ploy to get out of it.

My 1SG thinks, or thought, that I faked my grandfather's death to get out of a month-long rotation. To get out of two measly weeks in the box. As if I haven't spent years deployed away from my family, or as if I wasn't able to take emergency leave when by brother-in-law died, or as if I haven't already deployed with this unit before. And now two weeks is what I fake the death of my family for. Two weeks.

loving AAA+ Leadership right there!

# ? Feb 23, 2019 00:22

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

That�s my Corps!!!!!!

# ? Feb 23, 2019 00:28

PathAsc: Nov 15, 2011; Hail SS-18 Satan may he cleanse us with nuclear fire

PISS TAPE IS REAL

Going on that side of senior SNCO makes you turbo retarded

# ? Feb 23, 2019 00:35

spacetoaster: Feb 10, 2014

J.A.B.C. posted:

So, my grandfather just passed away. He had a stroke a few weeks ago, was recovering up until this morning, and then fainted. Blood pressure dropped, organs started failing, and he slipped into a coma. He passed about an hour ago.

Had to head back into the office to sign some hand receipts, 1SG and Commander see me, ask me if I'm alright. Tell me I'm still going to JRTC, which I expected. 1SG then says that when he first heard me talk about this, he thought it was some sort of ploy to get out of it.

My 1SG thinks, or thought, that I faked my grandfather's death to get out of a month-long rotation. To get out of two measly weeks in the box. As if I haven't spent years deployed away from my family, or as if I wasn't able to take emergency leave when by brother-in-law died, or as if I haven't already deployed with this unit before. And now two weeks is what I fake the death of my family for. Two weeks.

loving AAA+ Leadership right there!

I decided early on in my career that I'd rather have someone pull one over on me than be that kind of leader.

# ? Feb 23, 2019 03:51

EBB: Feb 15, 2005

Vahakyla posted:

I have landed and retain full control of my bladder and bowels. Feels nice.

good job high speed you missed the dz and landed in the marine corpse thread

# ? Feb 23, 2019 07:02

Vahakyla: May 3, 2013

EBB posted:

good job high speed you missed the dz and landed in the marine corpse thread

Never jump with red light.

# ? Feb 23, 2019 07:39

Internet Wizard: Aug 9, 2009; BANDAIDS DON'T FIX BULLET HOLES

At that point I�d try to get a Red Cross message to the command just out of spite to that dickbag

# ? Feb 24, 2019 19:20

Hekk: Oct 12, 2012; 'smeper fi

J.A.B.C. posted:

So, my grandfather just passed away. He had a stroke a few weeks ago, was recovering up until this morning, and then fainted. Blood pressure dropped, organs started failing, and he slipped into a coma. He passed about an hour ago.

Had to head back into the office to sign some hand receipts, 1SG and Commander see me, ask me if I'm alright. Tell me I'm still going to JRTC, which I expected. 1SG then says that when he first heard me talk about this, he thought it was some sort of ploy to get out of it.

My 1SG thinks, or thought, that I faked my grandfather's death to get out of a month-long rotation. To get out of two measly weeks in the box. As if I haven't spent years deployed away from my family, or as if I wasn't able to take emergency leave when by brother-in-law died, or as if I haven't already deployed with this unit before. And now two weeks is what I fake the death of my family for. Two weeks.

loving AAA+ Leadership right there!

Immediate family ( SPOUSE, mother, father, brother, sister, son, or daughter) are the only family that commanders MUST allow a service member emergency leave for (at least in the Marine Corps). However, the vast majority of the time accommodations are made for the grieving service member because the hit to unit morale otherwise is usually pretty severe. It seems silly that you wouldn't be able to go to the funeral and meet up with everyone afterwards. I would have just had you pack your poo poo and have it sent out with your platoon sergeant or whoever and had you meet your gear in the field.

Hekk fucked around with this message at 19:38 on Feb 24, 2019

# ? Feb 24, 2019 19:33

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

I think spouse is also in that list.

# ? Feb 24, 2019 19:37

Hekk: Oct 12, 2012; 'smeper fi

PenisMonkey posted:

I think spouse is also in that list.

Yeah of course. Sorry I missed that.

# ? Feb 24, 2019 19:38

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

Hey I wouldn�t put it past our beloved corps to not include them considering how many hard chargers get married just to get out of the barracks.

# ? Feb 24, 2019 19:39

PathAsc: Nov 15, 2011; Hail SS-18 Satan may he cleanse us with nuclear fire

PISS TAPE IS REAL

PenisMonkey posted:

I think spouse is also in that list.

IF THE CORPS WANTED YOU MARRIED THEY'D HAVE ISSUED YOU A SPOUSE OORAH

# ? Feb 24, 2019 19:40

PenisMonkey: Apr 30, 2004; Be gentally.

My parents had to get written authorization from General Barrow himself in order to conceive me.

# ? Feb 24, 2019 19:51

Internet Wizard: Aug 9, 2009; BANDAIDS DON'T FIX BULLET HOLES

My last master guns tried to argue that the Corps doesn�t incentivize getting married because moving out of the barracks isn�t that great at all actually.

# ? Feb 24, 2019 19:53