[Cooking] man I'm so stoked for food

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Plinkey: Aug 4, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

bob dobbs is dead posted:

I heard that loving twee fife ditty as soon as i read "townsends"

wut

# ? May 17, 2019 05:01

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# ? Apr 29, 2024 03:16

bob dobbs is dead: Oct 8, 2017; I love peeps; Nap Ghost

He only has the one pre video song so it gets in your head

# ? May 17, 2019 05:34

Plinkey: Aug 4, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

bob dobbs is dead posted:

He only has the one pre video song so it gets in your head

oh i know what you mean, songs dont get stuck in my head, there's too many other demons there

but i get it

# ? May 17, 2019 05:36

crazy cloud: Nov 7, 2012; by Cyrano4747; Lipstick Apathy

# ? May 17, 2019 05:48

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

who has got some hot salad tips for me

I suck at making salads

# ? May 17, 2019 13:06

augias: Apr 7, 2009

twoday posted:

who has got some hot salad tips for me

I suck at making salads

Use salt, olive oil,and balsamic vinegar (not rhe realexpensive kind).

# ? May 17, 2019 13:08

Crakkerjakk: Mar 14, 2016

Crakkerjakk posted:

Let's talk about salads.

First, let's talk cost. Greens are one of the most overpriced things you can buy at the grocery store, and also frequently have problems with e. Coli outbreaks due to lovely industrial farming practices (hello Romaine).

Greens also happen to be pretty much the easiest thing in the world to grow. They don't require much sun, much soil, they grow pretty quick, and you can clip off a few leaves at a time so you don't have to get the whole plant to maturity to eat it, and there are an amazing variety of different greens that you will never see at the store because they don't ship well in trucks. Plus fresh greens from your garden are way fresher and more tender than what you buy at the store.

How to grow greens:

1) Get a shallow windowbox to set inside a window that gets some sun but not direct sunlight all day. Preferably something with a tray on the bottom so if you over water the water will pool in the tray instead of in the bottom of the windowbox.
2) Fill with 4" of potting soil.
3) Scatter a seed packet of whatever greens look cool at a garden store, or ask a friend if they have some, or a lot of libraries will host a seed exchange and give away free seeds February-ish.
4) Water, then rake lightly to get some dirt on top of the seeds, but just a light covering.
5) Keep watering every couple days to keep the seeds moist until they sprout.
6) Once they have several leaves, chop the smallest ones off at the surface until you have a few of the bigger plants that are spaced at least 6" apart.
7) Start harvesting leaves off the outside of the plant as they look tasty, but never take all the leaves off the plant.

You can do this in pretty much any climate.

Also sweet potato greens are tasty and pretty and you can plant a sprouted sweet potato from the store in a small pot full of soil and hang it from your ceiling as a decorative houseplant that you can eat.

gently caress iceberg lettuce. It's devoid of any real nutritional value and way harder to grow.

Grow some fuckin' greens. They're good for you, tasty, and it'll make you feel like a dirt-wizard.

Back to actually making salads. How to not suck at salads:

1) Make your own dressing.
2) Put lots of stuff in it.

Okay, so store bought dressings are expensive as hell, and way too many of them are full of sugar. You can make a WAY better dressing yourself, and you can make a bunch of it and it'll keep in the fridge.

Take a mason jar or any empty glass jar with a good lid you've saved and try any of these:

Mustard Vinaigrette:
1 tbsp lemon juice
1 tsp Dijon mustard
1 tbsp white wine vinegar
1 minced garlic clove
1/2 cup olive oil
Sea salt
Ground black pepper.

Put in jar, shake the hell out of it. Double or triple to fill jar, shake the hell out if it again if it's been sitting in the fridge for a while.

Balsamic Vinaigrette
1/2 cup olive oil
1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
2 tsp Dijon mustard
1 clove minced garlic
1 tbsp honey
1 tsp salt
1/4 tap black pepper

Put in jar, shake.

Creamy Italian:
1/4 cup mayo
2 tbsp red wine vinegar
2 tbsp sour cream
2 tbsp olive oil
1 tsp Italian seasoning
1 clove garlic
1/4 tsp salt
1 tbsp chopped parsley

Put in jar, shake the hell out of it.

Asian Sesame:
2 Tbsp apple cider vinegar
1 tbsp honey
1.5 tsp peeled grated ginger
2 tbsp sesame oil
1/3 cup vegetable oil
1/2 tsp salt
Pepper
1/4 tsp garlic powder

Peanut-lime
1/4 cup peanut butter
2 tbsp water
Juice of one lime
1 tbsp rice or white wine vinegar
1 tbsp chopped peeled ginger
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp honey

Put in jar, shake.

Step two to good salads: lots of stuff.

lovely restaurant salads have iceberg lettuce, slivered carrots, a few tomatoes, and some cheese or some poo poo on top. gently caress that.

What do we want in a salad?

1) Colors
2) Textures
3) Protein
4) Fat

Colors are pretty, and full of nutrition. Textures give a variety of mouth feel so you're not just scarfing down leaves. Protein helps keep you full. So does fat.

First, fill a big bowl at least halfway with greens.

Then, chop up some different colored veggies and put em on top. Purple cabbage, carrots, tomatoes, onion (not too much, raw onion tends to be strongly flavored), peppers, cucumber, summer squash, roasted winter squash or tubers, green peas, radishes, broccoli, corn, etc.

Now throw some legumes on it. Cooked lentils it beans. Cubed tofu. Protein. Meat if you're a person that eats that, I suppose.

Now add fat. Avocado, all of the dressings I listed earlier. A handful of seeds or nuts (good for texture as well). Cheese if you must.

If you want, some cubed or sliced fruit works too, sometimes. Apples, oranges, pomegranate seeds, dried stuff like raisins or cranberries or apricots.

Don't eat sad lovely salads.

You can even add in some whole grains to beef it up more.

Anyway. Toss it all together, and eat. I like to make a big salad without dressing, put half in a big bowl, the other half in a casserole dish in the fridge, and add dressing to the bowl, eat it that day and the casserole dish the next day, so all that prep work can go towards a couple meals.

From the first couple pages.

# ? May 17, 2019 13:40

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

Oh thanks, I was looking for that

# ? May 17, 2019 14:24

i say swears online: Mar 4, 2005

the best salad is 90% crouton

# ? May 17, 2019 15:36

Plinkey: Aug 4, 2004; by Fluffdaddy

i say swears online posted:

the best salad is 90% crouton

they better be texas toast garlic crutons

# ? May 18, 2019 20:46

snoo: Jul 5, 2007

anchovies

# ? May 18, 2019 21:28

snoo: Jul 5, 2007

I found out I enjoy fresh corn in salads, so there's that

also I like to kind of quick pickle thin slices of red onion in rice vinegar and salt (less than 5 minutes needed) to cut the harsh flavor but still be tasty

# ? May 18, 2019 21:31

Moot .1415926535: Mar 24, 2006; Yep, that's pretty much it.

raw broccoli florets make for good crunchy salads just wash them shits first

# ? May 18, 2019 21:34

HUGE PUBES A PLUS: Apr 30, 2005

snoo posted:

I found out I enjoy fresh corn in salads, so there's that

also I like to kind of quick pickle thin slices of red onion in rice vinegar and salt (less than 5 minutes needed) to cut the harsh flavor but still be tasty

corn and black bean salad is one of my favorites.

# ? May 19, 2019 03:09

i say swears online: Mar 4, 2005

southwestern salads own. Mix a little cilantro and lime into ranch dressing

# ? May 19, 2019 16:21

bird with big dick: Oct 21, 2015

twoday posted:

who has got some hot salad tips for me

I suck at making salads

every salad needs pickled jalape�o slices, hard boiled eggs, sunflower seeds, and some kind of cheese.

# ? May 21, 2019 15:23

i say swears online: Mar 4, 2005

I WISH I liked hard boiled eggs, it would open me up to so much more midwestern food

# ? May 21, 2019 15:41

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

There has been some kind of crazy blueberry surplus lately, they have been insanely cheap and on sale for months, the shops are overflowing with them

Does anyone have a recipe for a pie or a jam or some other interesting blueberry ideas? How is pemmiken made?

# ? May 21, 2019 17:46

Doc Walrus: Jan 2, 2014; Cryin' Chris is a WASTE.; Nap Ghost

twoday posted:

There has been some kind of crazy blueberry surplus lately, they have been insanely cheap and on sale for months, the shops are overflowing with them

Does anyone have a recipe for a pie or a jam or some other interesting blueberry ideas? How is pemmiken made?

http://www.thegourmetgourmand.com/pork-tenderloin-with-blueberry-sauce/

You could also make a blueberry BBQ sauce to go with some pulled pork or a glazed lamb chop.

# ? May 21, 2019 19:09

i say swears online: Mar 4, 2005

classic cobbler is just great if you do those flour/brown sugar/cold butter crumble crunchies too

# ? May 21, 2019 19:34

Willie Tomg: Feb 2, 2006

twoday posted:

Does anyone have a recipe for a pie or a jam or some other interesting blueberry ideas? How is pemmiken made?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQZj1-lSilw

# ? May 21, 2019 19:37

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

how is pemkin formed

# ? May 21, 2019 20:05

Moot .1415926535: Mar 24, 2006; Yep, that's pretty much it.

twoday posted:

how is pemkin formed

I believe it is generated and stored in the balls

# ? May 21, 2019 20:42

Agean90: Jun 28, 2008

Puree the blueberries and make fruit leather

# ? May 21, 2019 20:54

Moot .1415926535: Mar 24, 2006; Yep, that's pretty much it.

https://twitter.com/crazygoose/status/1129836426437320704?s=21

# ? May 21, 2019 21:34

HUGE PUBES A PLUS: Apr 30, 2005

bird with big dick posted:

every salad needs pickled jalape�o slices, hard boiled eggs, sunflower seeds, and some kind of cheese.

Real potato salad consists of boiled diced potatoes, diced fresh cucumber, diced onion, diced hard boiled eggs, celery seed, pepper, generous dollops of mustard of choice and REAL mayonnaise. Miracle Whip is Satan and should be thrown back into the pit of hell where it was spawned from. anything else and you are not making potato salad.

Today I will buy fresh asparagus from a roadside stand. Will 5 pounds be enough?

# ? May 25, 2019 13:29

Doc Walrus: Jan 2, 2014; Cryin' Chris is a WASTE.; Nap Ghost

Moot .1415926535 posted:

https://twitter.com/crazygoose/status/1129836426437320704?s=21

good to know instant ramen can undo what it does to a toilet

HUGE PUBES A PLUS posted:

Real potato salad consists of boiled diced potatoes, diced fresh cucumber, diced onion, diced hard boiled eggs, celery seed, pepper, generous dollops of mustard of choice and REAL mayonnaise. Miracle Whip is Satan and should be thrown back into the pit of hell where it was spawned from. anything else and you are not making potato salad.

Today I will buy fresh asparagus from a roadside stand. Will 5 pounds be enough?

Let's talk about what an asparagus salad would entail

# ? May 26, 2019 00:31

Doc Walrus: Jan 2, 2014; Cryin' Chris is a WASTE.; Nap Ghost

https://www.cookingclassy.com/asparagus-tomato-feta-salad-balsamic-vinaigrette/

# ? May 26, 2019 00:34

Duscat: Jan 4, 2009; Fun Shoe

welp i had plans for memorial day but my non-cliff wife got us invited to somebody else's cookout so i guess this is happening now

dinner will be late

e:

also, serving them with this

Epic High Five posted:

actually it's a broccoli salad with almond slivers and raisins and no I will not share that recipe either, plz consider yourself defeated and humbly return the title belt to your nearest shitter depot

except with pecans and dried cranberries, but we didn't have dried cranberries so it's raisins after all, BUT IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE

Duscat has issued a correction as of 21:05 on May 26, 2019

# ? May 26, 2019 21:02

Doc Walrus: Jan 2, 2014; Cryin' Chris is a WASTE.; Nap Ghost

Ooh keep us updated. I forgot to take pictures becuase I got a little stressed out about it, but I made my ginger snap fried chicken idea! I brought it over to my parents' house and they were very pleased with it.
It included:
-King Hawaiian buns
-fresh spinach/ fresh basil mix
-Spiced yogurt marinated chicken breaded with panko and ginger snap crumbs
-Beefsteak tomato
-spiced cucumber raita

They weren't as spicy as they should have been, but they were very juicy and delicious. I'll try again sometime with more ginger and some chili paste in the marinade.

# ? May 27, 2019 01:40

Duscat: Jan 4, 2009; Fun Shoe

well these took way too long so we ended up just having chicken thighs for dinner anyway

gonna cut them in half and freeze for quick dinners later: mix a can of black beans, a can of pinto beans, some bbq sauce and salsa in a large pan, put your half rack of ribs on top, cover and simmer until thawed & heated through, and you have your warm ribs and really nice, smoky, pork fatty bbq beans for a side, just add mashed potatoes and a vegetable

# ? May 27, 2019 01:48

i say swears online: Mar 4, 2005

i just realized a lil taquiera next to me does elotes by the quart and now i wanna fork those ribs into a bucket of that stuff so bad

# ? May 27, 2019 06:45

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

HUGE PUBES A PLUS posted:

Today I will buy fresh asparagus from a roadside stand. Will 5 pounds be enough?

Asparagus season is a special time. That seems like a lot, but I can't blame you. What are you going to do with it?

Besides just cooking it as a side, I like to make asparagus quiches with ham or salmon

# ? May 27, 2019 10:32

Crakkerjakk: Mar 14, 2016

Home pickled asparagus is bomb too. I like em spicy with some red pepper flakes.

# ? May 27, 2019 12:42

Amazing Zimmo: Jan 27, 2006; That's quite a load you got in them diapers

poo poo. I tripped and bumped something.

# ? Jun 10, 2019 07:15

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

twoday posted:

Yesterday I was getting drunk in the park and I came across a temporary market and there I met a spice merchant who specialized in peppers from across Asia, but also had all kinds of crazy spices from Africa I had never seen or heard of. I spent �20 for 3 bags and two vials of exotic spices and then walked around through a field drinking cider for two hours, pausing to take a nap in front of a windmill. I arrived at a dinner party and offered some of the spices to my host, and it turns out she was absolutely obsessed with exotic pepper varieties and we started trading, and now to make a long story short I am some kind of unexpected spice merchant

Does anyone know what the gently caress to do with any of these, I�m in over my head here

# ? Jun 10, 2019 07:17

i say swears online: Mar 4, 2005

what the gently caress

do you have a mongol-era passport tablet

I think I only recognize grains of paradise. grind it into a chicken or pork marinade

# ? Jun 10, 2019 07:37

twoday: May 4, 2005; C-SPAM Times best-selling author

Look, I don�t understand my life either, it just keeps happening

# ? Jun 10, 2019 07:44

Prav: Oct 29, 2011

have you tried smoking them

# ? Jun 10, 2019 16:45

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# ? Apr 29, 2024 03:16

SymmetryrtemmyS: Jul 13, 2013; I got super tired of seeing your avatar throwing those fuckin' glasses around in the astrology thread so I fixed it to a .jpg

twoday posted:

Does anyone know what the gently caress to do with any of these, I’m in over my head here

I recognize long pepper, or pippali. It's good stuff, useful in Indonesian and Indian cooking. It's like a sweeter black pepper, kind of.

Edit that's the cheaper but still excellent Javan species. It's a little sweeter than the Indian one.

# ? Jun 10, 2019 17:34

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