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just scratch the kid if you don’t want them to play, you don’t have to hurt them
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Jan 4, 2020 03:17
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I tried dropping a turd in his helmet, but I'm old and ran out of stool softener a few days ago.
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Jan 4, 2020 03:53
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I remember the one time I accidently hit a good slap shot and got a little air that was a good day
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Jan 4, 2020 04:17
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Slap shots in beer league are dumb, wrist it and keep it on the ice.
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Jan 4, 2020 04:22
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xzzy posted:Slap shots in beer league are dumb, wrist it and keep it on the ice. Is this a joke or what. Always drop bomb-rear end clappers. Especially on kids. Then break their stick.
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Jan 4, 2020 04:37
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If you're not yelling rip it every time someone gets the puck at the blue line you're playing wrong
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Jan 4, 2020 04:48
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 the div 8 beer leagues are dead tomorrow
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Jan 4, 2020 05:42
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Henrik Zetterberg posted:Don’t ever pass up the opportunity to drop some howitzers on kids. https://twitter.com/Uppercut_Slut/status/1142950354528677890
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Jan 4, 2020 07:17
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Jesus Christ, hahahaaha. Mark Scheifele owns.
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Jan 4, 2020 07:21
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I feel vindicated.
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Jan 4, 2020 07:48
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Last night's game was really weird but probably one of my favorite games ever. It was our first playoff game this session. We finished last in the league and were playing the #8 seed to enter the quarterfinals proper. We'd just played them the week before to close out the regular season, winning 5-1 Went down a goal within the first three minutes but really quickly got it back. It was pretty even until about halfway through the 1st, when they got a few quick goals in succession to make it 4-1. Frequently in this situation we fall apart and lose like 8-2. Not last night though. We got back to work and got another one before the end of the 1st. Then I got my first on a rebound into a vacated net off a nice hard shot from the point. By the middle of the second we'd tied it up 4-4, but they got another two in the second half of the 2nd to end the period up 6-4. We managed to tie it back up (technically we scored three times but the refs blew a call on a goal that bounced hard back into play off the inside top of the net). I got that tying goal when my center fed me a clean puck from under the goal line right into the low slot. I barely got anything on it but it bounced in over the right pad. Unfortunately, they scored again with about 5 mins left to make it 7-6. We tied it up again with less than 3 on the clock. I hopped on the ice for what I assumed was my last shift in regular time at about 1:30. We managed to get it into the zone with under 15s left and I put a hard shot low glove side that just died in the crease. The goalie started scrambling and was down and out, but they'd collapsed all five of their players into the house and tied up all our forwards. Cue our defenseman showing up out of nowhere to backhand chip the puck over the sprawling goalie. I looked up at the clock just in time to see the final second tick off and the buzzer go. According to people on the bench, he scored the 8-7 game winner with 1.2 seconds left. Wild. The other team started complaining about the net being off and the refs huddled up. I told our team to just start the handshake line and the other team grudgingly did the same. Eventually I guess the refs determined that the other team had knocked the net off and hadn't gained possession, and it wasn't off enough to change whether it was a goal? I'm not so sure about that, but I didn't notice the net come off at all and I'll take the win. bgreman fucked around with this message at 06:17 on Jan 5, 2020 |
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Jan 5, 2020 06:14
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Another fun story from the rink where beer league players get healthy scratched: On Sunday my team decided to actually play as a unit with some good passes and dominated the guys we were playing. They were getting pretty angry about it, mostly bitching at their own teammates for various minor mistakes. In the second period one of their better skaters completely gave up and looped around in the neutral zone cherry picking. Then during a stoppage (it might have been between periods, can't remember anymore) we noticed him headed to the locker room. After the game I asked a guy I knew if he was hurt and he told me the team kicked him out of the game for not playing. 
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Jan 8, 2020 02:08
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Our game on Sunday they had 18 on the bench vs our 8. They had so many guys that they couldn't all sit down. I think I saw a guy play for a shift or two the entire game. They also had a lot of good skaters and barely beat us.
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Jan 8, 2020 03:22
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18 what the gently caress
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Jan 8, 2020 03:24
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Seriously. 15 is Max. This ain't the nhl
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Jan 8, 2020 03:26
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The "captain" even posted a team picture after their win on Facebook. One of their better players left during the third because it was a cluster gently caress. He did say he was interested in joining us next year. I told him as long as he drinks beers with us afterwards he's on the team.
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Jan 8, 2020 03:34
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Finally found a good adult power skating course I think. I've been taking different learn to play classes since I started playing 5 years ago, and for the past 3 years or so I'm generally one of the better skaters and get put into the "advanced" group (or if the teacher sucks there are no groups.) Went to this one last night a couple towns away and the instructors immediately spotted a ton of things I'm doing wrong and put me in the lowest group. My crossovers in particular are dog poo poo so I'm really looking forward to going back to basics with people who know what they're talking about. Hopefully in a few weeks I'll unlock the power of this supposed "outside edge"
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Jan 8, 2020 15:45
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I healthy scratched the outside edge of my skates so I don’t have to work on using it.
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Jan 8, 2020 19:17
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calandryll posted:The "captain" even posted a team picture after their win on Facebook. One of their better players left during the third because it was a cluster gently caress. He did say he was interested in joining us next year. I told him as long as he drinks beers with us afterwards he's on the team. We've evolved our team to having pre-game pints (at bar), locker room beers and then post-game pints (at bar). Maximize the hockey and all things included. When I skate on my left inside edge, it feels to me like the whole blade bends outwards. When I look at it, the rivets are fine and the tower/blade structure seem sturdy. Is it just my bad skating?
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Jan 8, 2020 20:38
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18 people ON THE BENCH? So like...23 altogether? either way, what the gently caress
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Jan 8, 2020 20:46
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V for Vegans posted:I healthy scratched the outside edge of my skates so I don’t have to work on using it. I healthy scratch any basic skills I may have, same reason.
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Jan 8, 2020 20:49
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Tank44 posted:We've evolved our team to having pre-game pints (at bar), locker room beers and then post-game pints (at bar). Maximize the hockey and all things included. I would love to do that but we have guys show up 10 minutes before puck drop. I think it was 18 total. The team will bench guys during a power play and overtime to maximize the win. They're pretty ridiculous.
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Jan 8, 2020 22:07
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poo poo we're lucky to have 9 or 10 most nights
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Jan 8, 2020 22:29
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9 or 10 is the ideal and perfect number of skaters. Anything more than two forward lines sucks poo poo unless you're playing for longer than an hour.
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Jan 8, 2020 23:16
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calandryll posted:I would love to do that but we have guys show up 10 minutes before puck drop. As a captain, I'll set up a specific line for powerplays or overtime for playoff games only, and only if we're trailing. I've asked the team and the players who sit beforehand (as part of the season welcome information) if that's reasonable and only once has someone objected. I let him play his normal shift on a PP while we were behind in a playoff game. Communication and shared objectives are the key there. I'd never force someone to sit if they weren't on board with it unless they were a non-roster sub.
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Jan 9, 2020 21:29
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Overtime?
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Jan 11, 2020 00:30
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Bradf0rd posted:Overtime? In one of my leagues, we get a five minute overtime in the playoffs before it goes to a shootout.
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Jan 11, 2020 03:13
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Nah we get a short ot and shootout in playoffs up here too Regular season is definitely "Oh you're tied? Cool no one cares get off the ice."
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Jan 11, 2020 03:17
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Just left my first ever hockey class! It was extremely fun but holy gently caress am I terrible. Two questions: When I try to stop, especially on my left side the skate, like, stutters? I do eventually stop (or just eat it) but this feels really unstable. Any tips? I also can’t stop at speed I just skate into the boards lol Secondly, they had us doing a lot of balance drills (skating on one foot, getting down on one knee and getting up again). It always feels like I’m gonna fall on my face when they tell us to get lower and I don’t know where on my foot or where I should have my booty/torso to be balanced correctly.
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Jan 11, 2020 07:24
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Stuttering means you’re not putting enough weight on that edge to stop, generally. Keep your back straight and your head up. Bend your knees and stick your butt out like you’re doing a squat. Your weight should be on the balls of your feet. It’s not easy to learn, it’ll take time.
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Jan 11, 2020 16:03
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Also ankle strength. People with weak ankles (usually new skaters) notice that shutter or wobble while skating straight or trying to stop but it goes away the stronger your legs and ankles get. Watch people who never work out try to do a squat in a bosu ball. Their weaker leg will usually shake uncontrollably. Just make sure you're trying to practice on both legs equally. Verman fucked around with this message at 00:08 on Jan 12, 2020 |
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Jan 11, 2020 22:11
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Chemmy is right. it’s class one. Stopping doesn’t come easily or quickly for almost everyone. Keep practicing, then with more speed, and you’ll get there (and eat it a bunch)
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Jan 11, 2020 22:31
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It took me like 8 weeks to learn how to stop on my good foot and over a year to learn how to stop on my weak foot. I think maybe it would've gone faster if my skates were the right size but regardless, skating is really hard! Be prepared to suck for a long time (or, like many of us in this thread, forever)
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Jan 12, 2020 05:42
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The one time I captained because the regular guy was out, when we went on the pk I wouldn’t know or remember what position the guy in the box played so I just randomly would say left or right wing sits and tries to keep it even. I enjoy the idea of beer league pp lines as if any team in beer league history has been better a man up than even strength or even on the pk. I mean I guess unless you have 5 players who are actually good at passing.
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Jan 12, 2020 20:59
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We score more on the pk than pp. We joke that we really should just run 4 guys the entire game. It probably also helps that 80% of our team have played defense. I used to play d till this team but I find myself enjoying wing more. It's also nice because most of the offense have no issues falling back if the d pinches.
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Jan 12, 2020 21:39
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Scored short handed with ten seconds left to win our beer league game against the Cop team with thin blue line Punisher mask uniforms.
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Jan 13, 2020 03:54
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z0331 posted:. I agree, power play is a magnifying glass on team play to me (over individual play) My teams wheee goal were often 2 assists from the offensive half of the ice? Those teams power plays whipped rear end and it was super fun and good to learn from having time in the zone.
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Jan 13, 2020 11:51
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For those with kids, when did you strap skates on them? Our 16 month old was at my game last night, the other team was a no-show so we got free ice time, and my daughter and wife sat in the penalty box watching. Our daughter loved it, she likes watching with me when I watch on TV. Figure get her used to skates early so she can be a lot better skater than I will ever be.
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Jan 13, 2020 12:04
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At about that age. He likes it but can’t stand on his own so I annihilated my back bending over to hold him up. I don’t think he learned anything from it but he had fun. He’s almost three now and we’re starting to take him to learn to skate class on his own.
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Jan 13, 2020 15:28
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This is the first time I didn't have to draft anyone for the upcoming season. 13 of our 16 players are returning from last season, with 2 more who played on our team in previous seasons, and only 1 new guy who's a friend of a teammate. We've been below average the last two seasons record-wise, but we all mesh really well and games are fun with this crew, which is all I really want out of a beer league. That said, 6 of our losses last year were by 1 goal, so I think we've got a good shot at bouncing back and having a winning season.
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Jan 13, 2020 17:00
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