- Smirking_Serpent
- Aug 27, 2009
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AITA for siding with my girlfriend in this situation?
I live with my girlfriend of 2 years (I'm 22M, she's 26). She has decided to leave her period supplies on a bath shelf in the open, with a little note to feel free to take some if you need for our guests with a period. She had this idea after we had my little sister over a few months ago and she asked for some pads and there were none available in sight (she used to keep them stashed away). My little sister seemed a bit embarrassed, so my girlfriend thought this would minimize discomfort for our future guests. She asked me if I'm fine with it and I definitely was.
Moving forward to today. I'm still in university (started a bit later, worked so I could save money) and my uni mates are roughly 18-19. They can be a bit immature but we (used to) get along fine. I had a group of guys over for a study session in the living room, and my girlfriend was working in our office. While I was making coffee in the kitchen, one of the guys brought the basket with period supplies in the living room and they started putting tampons up their noses, sticking pads to their faces. I got very angry and demanded they put it back immediately and replace the supplies. They were laughing, saying I can't take a joke, at which point I demand (loudly) that they leave and everyone gets serious. My girlfriend came into the room to check what's going on and was shocked, left teary-eyed and called the guys assholes. I demanded once again they pack up and leave, which they eventually did.
One of the guys texted me that I'm an rear end in a top hat and not fun anymore. I'm a bit worried since I have no other friends at uni, but I didn't realize this group of people are so immature. So, AITA? Could I have handled this better?
EDIT: Seems like the general consensus is that I'm NTA. That is very reassuring, and I will try to meet other people at uni, won't waste too much time over a bunch of immature assholes. Also, since it seems having period supplies available is appreciated (and they can get expensive), I will also pitch in next time we're shopping for them. Thank you all! 
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Jan 30, 2020 05:58
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- Adbot
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Apr 29, 2024 10:41
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- Beachcomber
- May 21, 2007
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Another day in paradise.
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Slippery Tilde
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AITA for siding with my girlfriend in this situation?
Fake. No one that well adjusted posts on Reddit.
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Jan 30, 2020 06:03
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- Clearly A Dog
- Jun 14, 2017
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woof o_o
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AITA for siding with my girlfriend in this situation?
Kinda cute tho rite?
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Jan 30, 2020 06:04
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- Pirate Radar
- Apr 18, 2008
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You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!
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From AAM:
quote: My current employer (a quasi-governmental corporation with over 10,000 employees) sends out company-wide emails every time an employee or customer is arrested for or convicted of a crime. These emails describe — often in lurid detail — exactly what the person was accused of doing.
Here’s a snippet from an email I received today:
Former [company] employee [name], [age], of [city], was sentenced yesterday to two years of judicial diversion supervised by the [state] Department of Correction. [Name] plead guilty to solicitation of a minor after facing charges for aggravated statutory rape. He was ordered to undergo psychosexual evaluation and will be on the [state] Sex Offender Registry.
[Name] was arrested on [date], after arranging to meet with an individual he believed to be a fifteen-year-old girl for a sexual encounter. The individual with whom [name] was communicating was, in fact, an undercover [city] Police Department investigator.
I get emails like this about every month or so. Sometimes, they describe specifically the tactics used by the criminal on their victim(s), such as this clip from another email I received recently: “[Name] exposed himself and masturbated while seated next to a female [at a highly specific location on company property].” (Sidebar: Do they want copycat predators to learn where gaps exist in the company’s surveillance system?) A mug shot of the person often is included, especially if the criminal was caught by cameras before, during, or after the incident. They all turn my stomach to read.
I’ve worked in four other professional settings, all of which had thousands of employees and served millions of customers, so statistically speaking all of them must have had their fair share of criminals walking around us at any given time. Yet none of the others went out of their way like this company does to make sure we all know that guy in accounting didn’t just get fired — he was also involved in some kind of sex crime too.
I assume they are legally allowed to divulge this information once the person has been convicted, but what about when they’ve just been arrested and nothing has been proven yet in court? I also have to believe the company thinks doing this promotes employee safety in some way. Otherwise, it just seems very voyeuristic and frankly kind of prurient: They never seem to go into as much detail when the crime isn’t sexual in nature. As for today’s Criminal of the Month, the crime occurred several states away, the guy no longer works here and everyone outside his department didn’t know him anyway, so it’s highly unclear to me how much threat he poses any of us anymore.
What exactly am I supposed to do with this information I keep getting about the people around me occasionally committing crimes? How does having this level of detail about their crimes improve my performance at work or increase my safety outside of work? Can I ask them to simply send out one-sentence emails like “Former employee John Doe was convicted of solicitation of a minor and indecent exposure in Narnia County Court yesterday,” maybe followed up with a generic “if you see evidence of coworkers or customers committing a crime, report it immediately to X” and let the people who actually worked with him do their own research if they care to know more?
The first line of the response is “This is EXTREMELY STRANGE”
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Jan 30, 2020 06:19
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- empty sea
- Jul 17, 2011
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gonna saddle my seahorse and float out to the sunset
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I dunno, I would just feel gross loving my sister's ex. And I honestly can't imagine approaching my obviously deeply depressed sister and asking her to be a god mother or do anything for me and her ex, especially since I knew their history and her trauma with infertility. What the gently caress.
I don't love my step-sister, exactly, but I would never do this kind of poo poo to her, ever. It's like she's just goading her sister into loving suicide and the ex is helping.
"Fell pregnant" is the most gross term ever. They got pregnant because they were loving without protection, probably because he wanted to and she wants to keep it, even though this will probably make her sister suicidal, if she isn't already.
Selfish, gross assholes.
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Jan 30, 2020 08:32
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- SilvergunSuperman
- Aug 7, 2010
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quote:but then i fell unexpectedly pregnant
Really gotta watch your step.
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Jan 30, 2020 09:05
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- Private Cumshoe
- Feb 15, 2019
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AAAAAAAGAGHAAHGGAH
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Really gotta watch your step.
Maybe she was walking around barefoot?
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Jan 30, 2020 09:06
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- thatguy
- Feb 5, 2003
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From AAM:
The first line of the response is “This is EXTREMELY STRANGE”
How has that not been widely reported by now, that's so hosed up you'd think somebody would have blown that up already. That makes me think it's a medium sized US govt contractor, I just have no idea who it would be
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Jan 30, 2020 09:08
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- Pirate Radar
- Apr 18, 2008
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You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!
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I fell instantly and unexpectedly anger pregnant
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Jan 30, 2020 09:10
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- Darkhold
- Feb 19, 2011
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No Heart❤️
No Soul👻
No Service🙅
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Found a distressing one:
AITA for asking my sister to throw my baby shower party when she is suffering from infertility
She gets thrashed in comments
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Jan 30, 2020 10:30
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- Serephina
- Nov 8, 2005
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恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー
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THE LEDE, I FOUND IT
AITA for messing with my husband in order to prove a point?
quote:
Pertinent background information: I am a stay at home wife. My husband makes more than enough so that I don't have to work, but I do contribute monetarily bc I receive a disability check each month. Not nearly as much as he but the point is I contribute through monetary means. I also contribute by keeping the household running smoothly ie cooking, cleaning, paying the bills, doing the laundry, running errands, and so on.
Our finances are joined our checks both go into the same account. But as a courtesy, I always ask him before I spend money on myself for a splurge every once in a great while. My particular vice is computer games, I thoroughly enjoy them however I never spend all day on them.
Inciting incident: recently one of the games I've wanted went on sale for 30 bucks which I thought was a steal so I asked my husband if I could get. The gist of the conversation was him asking why I wanted it, me explaining the above, and him saying he didn't think it was a good enough reason this kind of pissed me off. I say it's our money if I want to get myself something I should be able to. He tells me well it's not like you contribute as much as I do monetarily. This reply floored me, I said yup you're right I don't contribute in other meaningful ways at all. He starts to give me the silent treatment which went on for days. In soife of my best efforts to speak with him about the situation he wouldn't discuss it or budge. After day four of it I decider to do the following.
What happened next: after that conversation I decided to teach him a lesson about just how valuable the things I do are to the running of our household. I stopped cleaning, every time he would say something about it I would say I don't contribute anything remember? I stopped doing laundry, cooking, and even taking care of the finances. He loves taking naps in the chair I'd drop something heavy bear his chair and wake him up from the loud noises. I felt if he was going to be passive-aggressive then so could I.
End event: (and why I may be more of TAH.) /Finally after doing this for the last week he comes home and says fine you win now will you start taking care of things again? I get up to walk to the fridge and pull out a bottle of ketchup setting it in front of him. And I say ok now you can eat your words. In my defense, it was a joke albeit maybe a little bit of a jab at him. It wasn't meant to be serious.
Well, now he thinks I'm the bigger AH here because all he did was say no and not talk to me. And what I did (all things mentioned above) were far worse than him being controlling with what I can and can't buy for entertainment purposes. I, on the other hand, feel he was being controlled and I shouldn't have had to justify wanting something that would nowhere near break the bank lays I reasonably contribute to our funds. We are at a stalemate, so Reddit which one of us is TAH here? Or do we both just suck?
Clarification; I'm 22 he is 37.
Edit: to add his take-home pay is 8k a month between retirement from his first job and his current check. I bring in 1500 a month for disability.
Ok.because it keeps getting asked. I have to ask permission for anything I spend money on that's not essential. I have to have receipts for the essential things so he can review what was bought and make sure it's not something that we don't need. He sometimes also earmarks money when I asked he had not told me to set aside any money for that week this far so I thought it would be ok. He deemed me getting the game as a nonessential and a waste.
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Jan 30, 2020 11:40
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- welcome to hell
- Jun 9, 2006
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My [22M] wife [36F] practices non-monogamy, I walked in on her having sex in our living room. Please help me get over this
quote:
We've been married for 3 years and started this arrangement a year and a half ago. Our marriage is open for both of us to see others for sex but she is the only one who does. I thought I was okay with this, up until now we had an agreement that I would not ask and she would not tell. It was going fine until this past weekend when I came home from a sports meet up to find her and this one guy she has been seeing having sex on the living room couch. She only noticed me when I walked into the living room through the door and the guy quickly got his stuff and left.
I feel awful right now. I know she didn’t do anything wrong because this was within the boundaries of the relationship we agreed on together. I think it’s my fault because I should have made it clear that our house is off limits to bring others back to. But part of me feels like she should have known not to do this. The worst thing is the other guy had a penis the size of a baseball bat and I am 4 inches myself so now I can’t get the thoughts of my wife enjoying this other guy so much out of my head. I haven’t spoken to her about this yet because I don’t know if I’m ready to. She’s tried to initiate conversations but I have been distant. I know I am treating her unfairly by not talking to her but I don’t want to end up saying something I’ll regret due to feeling hurt. Reddit can you offer me any advice or talk some sense into me before I speak with my wife? What should I do going forward?
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Jan 30, 2020 11:42
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- Barudak
- May 7, 2007
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Ive entered into an open barn door arrangement
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Jan 30, 2020 11:46
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- avoid doorways
- Jun 6, 2010
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'twas brillig
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Gun Saliva
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Cant seem to end my marriage
quote:(F38) been married 10 years (M37) and have a 7 year old kid. We are both "on the spectrum" but diagnosed late, in our 30s. I have much better masking and executive functioning than him so I'm successful in my career and he has struggled his whole life to hold down a job or finish a degree and flits from idea to idea. He has been a loving and devoted stay at home dad for the past many years pursuing whatever special interest he though was going to be his next big break, but nothing ever seems to stick.
We were really happy and I was fine with being the bread winner...until 2016 when Trump was elected BECAUSE HE SUPPORTS TRUMP (admires his entrepreneur-ness, don't even get me STARTED). We almost divorced that year but I managed to hold it together for the sake of our kid. We have had a rocky few years since then, with him finally being diagnosed with Asperger's after being fired from his first job in years for trying to blackmail the CEO (they were doing shady poo poo). A few other incidents caused by him since then have given me a great deal of anxiety, and I don't see that changing.
Oh yeah, and every time marriage gets hard he starts looking for other women. (3 times in the past 3 years) He can't land them, because even though he is very attractive most women notice his crazy aspie side right away and run for the hills (I guess I'm just naive? I thought "he's quirky like me, he has an interesting brain" etc) I don't really blame him. I want to do the same thing sometimes. I don't really feel threatened because I'm awesome and he's lucky to have me and he's just being silly, but still, REALLY? Grow up and let's separate first. we've been talking a lot about separating but I always lose my nerve.
I don't know if it's hysterical bonding or what, but whenever I decide that I can't do this anymore and we need to divorce I change my mind again at the thought of throwing away everything we have that's good (and there is good) and get all emotional and just want him to hold and comfort me because divorcing will be so SAD. I just don't know if the bad really outweighs the good. I need a freakin spreadsheet! What is wrong with me?!
TL;DR: a couple of Aspies have been thinking and talking about divorce since 2016 but can't seem to follow through.
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Jan 30, 2020 11:53
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- Pirate Radar
- Apr 18, 2008
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You're not my Ruthie!
You're not my Debbie!
You're not my Sherry!
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https://twitter.com/sixbrownchicks/status/1222578526651604993?s=21
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Jan 30, 2020 14:42
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- teen witch
- Oct 9, 2012
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quote:
AITA for not wanting my (future) stepdaughter to read a poem dedicated to her deceased mother at my wedding?
u/gotmildew4h
Sorry for another wedding post. Throw-away of course.
So my fiancé (37M) and I (30F) are getting married in April. He has a 15 year old daughter who currently lives with us but will be moving in with her grandparents soon for school.
Her mother (my fiancé’s first wife) passed away 2 years ago from cancer. I met my fiancé while he was married but nothing romantic happened between us until after she passed. However just the fact that I’ve met his daughter as a family friend during that time has made her incredibly distrustful of me, even though we never had an affair and I’ve made that very clear to her.
Anyways, recently she told my fiancé that she’d like to read a poem at our wedding during the speech portions. It’s one based on loss and family, and is quite a nice poem, but she’d like to publicly dedicate it to her late mom with a short speech after.
I read the draft of it and am incredibly unhappy with how it sounds. Essentially she wants to talk about how happy her dad and her mom used to be while she was alive, and how their marriage was the stuff of fairy tales. She ends it with a “I hope [me and my fiance] will have a fairy tale of their own” which is a nice sentiment if that was only thing she’s reading. Basically, I feel like she’d be using our wedding to reminisce how my fiancé’s last marriage was the unobtainable stuff of fairytales and I’d just be lucky to get a tiny piece of what they had. It sure feels like a intentional jab towards me.
I get that she’s still grieving and she’s a kid and all that. But I really don’t want this read at our wedding, which I want to be a celebration of new beginnings, not death or grief or ex wives. I’ve talked to my fiancé and he sees 100% NOTHING wrong with the speech which has frankly upset me beyond what I’d imagined. I feel like he’s insisting on prioritizing her during a day that should be about me and him ONLY, not his kid or ex.
I’ve mulled over asking her directly to cut the speech portion and just read the poem, perhaps with a nice “dedicated to my mom” at the end and nothing more. AITA if I do this or something similar?
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Jan 30, 2020 15:06
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- Ghost Leviathan
- Mar 2, 2017
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Exploration is ill-advised.
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I feel this one is something for the ages too
https://twitter.com/SixBrownChicks/status/1222578527771512833
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Jan 30, 2020 15:53
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- Fuck Your Website
- Nov 29, 2003
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FUCK YOU, AND FUCK YOUR WEBSITE
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My employer wants me to remove an offensive sticker from my truck
quote:I recently broke up with my girlfriend and to retaliate, I put a sticker across the front windshield of my truck that says “Lift it! Fat girls can’t jump.” (My truck is raised or “lifted” really high. You have to climb up to get in. The sticker makes fun of fat girls not able to get in my truck.) It was funny to me and my friends.
I drive the truck to work every day, and about the end of the first week, my manager came and asked me about it. I explained and he asked if I would take it off since some people had told him they found it offensive and embarrassing. I said I would park at the end of the lot and face it away from building. He came back next day and asked again if I would remove it. I said I would cover it up when coming on the property. The next week, HR approached me and reminded me of the anti-harassment policy. I am holding my ground on offering to cover it up but not removing it. I spent $150! I am waiting on what will be decided but what do you think I can expect?
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Jan 30, 2020 16:00
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- Mr. Fall Down Terror
- Jan 24, 2018
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by Fluffdaddy
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"ugh, my casual bigotry has negative consequences! how can i assert myself to my employers over this trivial matter without having to change the offensive message on my vehicle or otherwise modify my behavior at all, while also avoiding any of the personally harmful outcomes of my provocative decisions? help!"
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Jan 30, 2020 16:09
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- rotinaj
- Sep 5, 2008
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Fun Shoe
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My employer wants me to remove an offensive sticker from my truck
This dude needs to replace it with a big sticker that says “I EAT rear end”
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Jan 30, 2020 16:12
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- Mr. Fall Down Terror
- Jan 24, 2018
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by Fluffdaddy
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"removing the insult from my vehicle is NOT an option, it was a very expensive insult!"
vvv he doesn't want to gently caress fat women, and you need to know this as an essential part of his personality
Mr. Fall Down Terror fucked around with this message at 16:17 on Jan 30, 2020
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Jan 30, 2020 16:13
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- henkman
- Oct 8, 2008
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I don't understand what that's supposed to be a retaliation against
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Jan 30, 2020 16:14
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- Explosive Tampons
- Jul 9, 2014
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Your days are gone!!!
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dunno, maybe try spending 150 on something actually funny at least next time you wanna be offensive, like the I EAT rear end guy
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Jan 30, 2020 16:22
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- avoid doorways
- Jun 6, 2010
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'twas brillig
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Gun Saliva
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Help, there are signs my mother is flirting with my husband
quote:Mother(53f)
Husband(40m)
Me(27f)
We are married for 3 years now and know each other for 5.
So, since these two met for the first time, their interactions are nothing like how they interact with other people. First thing she did, she looked very deep into his eyes and said mmm you are good looking. Then every other time they are in the same room, there is this weird tension in the atmosphere. I'll give you two examples.
She continuously talks about how beautiful she was in her youth, which is true, and sometimes in the same sentence says how I don't look like her at all. One time she brought her old albums and after making him look at like 150 pictures, she almost showed him a half naked photo.
She offered to help me with my child, but every time she comes here, she and him argue like they are the couple, talking to each other way more casually than e.g my father or sister talk to him, and suddenly talking to me as if I am a child.
On top of that, 2 of my male friends who met her, in separate occasions, openly told me that she flirted them and if I think that's OK. At the time I didn't believe it but said yes, it's OK.
The final straw is that when I discussed this with the therapist I'm going to, he didn't disregard me as he always does. Normally I say stuff like 'people were rude to me at the supermarket today, I think they don't like me' and he never believes it, he says I have to change my perception. This time he said that well, my mother hasn't had a boyfriend in years, she's worried about growing old, so maybe that's why she's trying to prove she's worth something, by being flirty. I was horrified.
What am I to do? I didn't say anything to my husband about this yet.
Tl;dr: It seems like my mother is flirting my husband, she's flirted my friends before, I want advice please.
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Jan 30, 2020 16:30
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- Meme Poker Party
- Sep 1, 2006
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by Azathoth
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My employer wants me to remove an offensive sticker from my truck
Can't believe a guy with giant lifted truck is a stupid rear end in a top hat.
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Jan 30, 2020 16:58
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- Slowpoke Rodriguez
- Jun 20, 2009
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dunno, maybe try spending 150 on something actually funny at least next time you wanna be offensive, like the I EAT rear end guy
I suggest a "Honk if you're horny" bumper sticker.
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Jan 30, 2020 16:58
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- Beachcomber
- May 21, 2007
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Another day in paradise.
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Slippery Tilde
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Can't believe a guy with giant lifted truck is a stupid rear end in a top hat.
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Jan 30, 2020 17:24
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- Adbot
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ADBOT LOVES YOU
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Apr 29, 2024 10:41
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Jan 30, 2020 05:58
